A Journey To Silence (Live: Replay No. 2)

So thank you very much everybody,

I can see several donations have come through there and that's really appreciated both for myself and Insight Timer.

So this is the second live that I've done on Insight Timer,

Hundreds of lives elsewhere,

Some of you are well aware of that and the harp music I use is from my friend Tara Cook who created a lot of the harp tracks actually I use were from after her attendance at these events the music kind of started to come through spontaneously and that track was called Seeking.

So tonight's is to take you a little bit further from the prior session which I looked at specifically what does it really mean to go within and I want to take that further tonight by looking at what I'm calling a journey to silence and it's for those of you who didn't attend last time I discovered after the stream that they're not automatically available on replay on Insight Timer which was a surprise to me but fortunately I was able to download the audio and I've uploaded that as a standalone track but that's not going to be available until mid January I'm told but in any event that it will eventually be available for anybody who wants to catch up but just a brief recap of what I covered last time and then to take things a little bit further I was using the metaphor of going within essentially like us being this a point of light here and considering ourselves as one of these points of light and most of the time we're looking out into the world and meditation is essentially about looking down the fiber optic lamp principally firstly to become aware that this as the source of all the light or spheres of light as I call it the pure state I am I not personal I which must so most often used to referring to and the state I am is beingness universal beingness and what I was seeking to point out that even as subtle as this is this I am this this beingness this aliveness it can be sensed or witnessed from a deeper presence that I called the silent witness that sees the state I am and all other phenomena whether that be thoughts feelings emotions physical sensations and so forth and it's the recognition of this silent witness that sees this is a key step in the meditative journey because this silent witness eventually in itself as I guided you into the meditation and I'll do again later also dissolves into the power that drives the light or the I amness and that's the infinite silence which on this metaphor is the battery down at the bottom here except that in truth it's across the whole universe so that was pretty much all of the last session in a few moments there just bear with me a moment I'll just have a sip of water and it's coming to this absolute space of stillness infinite silence as it emerged in the realization the infinite silence that is the realization of the true self or that which we truly are and this essence this infinite silence you'll find as your meditation journey deepens always remains untouched unmoved and unblemished by the appearances or the phenomena in life and that is essentially what the meditative journey is about is about coming to that recognition that realization now one of the insights I didn't focus on a lot last time but I used it in the meditation is something that I say in the meditation and it's a direct pointing to self-realization and it's this in silence you will realize your truth and in truth you will realize you are silence and this you is you as non-personal awareness or infinite silence terms I use interchangeably now most often in daily life when we think of silence we're simply thinking of the absence of sound and that's okay you know the sound and then the silence but actually there's all sorts of other phenomena just in our bodies physical sensations emotions and so forth now the infinite silence that I'm referring to in is the absence of all phenomena all phenomena a place of such profound stillness profound silence that words cannot describe it and that's why the word infinite before the silence is very important for as that is realized it will be seen recognized that one is this infinite silence and what happened typically can happen is the dropping of first all of the focus on the external phenomena most commonly our thoughts feelings emotions eventually are like a body awareness will also drop and they're simply just awareness remaining or infinite silence and if meditation has their goal and it doesn't because eventually we realize we are the meditation it's the recognition or more accurately realization realization of this and that's why the term selfly are like and so it's before and beyond all all phenomena not just sound not just sound and this infinite silence is the power the essence from which all things and your body is a thing even beingness is thing thoughts are things they arise and they return to silence essentially all phenomena from a universal perspective are simply vibrational patterns or waves appearing on the green screen of consciousness now when we're meditating focusing on phenomena and analyzing those phenomena we won't go as deep as as if when we're just recognizing that phenomena are here but not attack any importance or analysis to the accepting of the participant whether that be a feeling an emotion a thought or whatever it may be so all of meditation all of meditation is about recognizing realizing this touched and unblemished awareness that in truth has never actually gone anywhere it simply has always been here never not been here there's never been a time and there never will be a time that this awareness is not here but because our attention is typically focused up here like in the fiber optic lamp in the phenomenal world this is why we miss the blindingly obvious there's a phrase in English that we use if you know it might be that you stood in front of a a fro forest and we sometimes say you can't see the wood for the trees it is so blindingly obvious this awareness that it's so easy to miss because of this focus on all peer in the phenomenal world rather than resting one's attention in stillness or silence so you remember last time and it's probably worth doing it again it's worth an exercise that's worth repeating this to start to open you up the who am I exercise I did let's just do that now again because it's a very quick and very very powerful exercise so just close your eyes and firstly just simply noticing any phenomena that are here and don't judge them just accept them whether it's physical sensations emotions feelings and recognize that over time through your life all of these phenomena come and they go come and they go so the question is what is it what is it that sees the arising of a phenomena an emotion say and then its disappearance what is it that can see that and you'll eventually come to see that is untouched awareness because what you will see as though although the phenomena such as emotions are changing moving increasing in intensity decreasing in intensity physical sensations are arising thoughts are coming in and going this awareness that is able to report them share them with the world and others always remains untouched and unmoved so if you still got your eyes closed at the moment start being open to recognizing that there's an awareness a presence within you a witnessing presence that I call the silent witness that is just simply watching without any judgment and it's untouched and unmoved by the passing phenomena now as we do that and are open to that which is your eyes closed we're going to do that same exercise again ask the question inside who am I who am I who am I and just see if anything emerges there who am I and if nothing comes that's okay just be rid that just resting in this witnessing presence still and now let's ask the question who am I without memory who am I without memory and just be with that good and again it doesn't matter if anything arises or not just accepting what's here and I just want to now just check in with you and see if anybody wants to share anything what if they observed anything with those two questions the who am I first anybody got anything there just put it in the comments and then second the who am I without memory now on the first one if you're not familiar with the exercise what I typically can find is people might start to focus on role or their name or you know I'm a mother I am a woman I am a man or sometimes they get words like love as you go to the second one this tends to open people up a little bit further because what this does loving awareness great Nicole thank you for sharing that I'm guessing that's possibly the first one we'll come back to that in a moment the reason the second one so important is because we tend to live from our memory or imagination our memory or imagination and what you're doing by taking away the opportunity for mind to go to memory is to move into a deeper stillness a deeper presence because essentially what we're calling mind is built up of thoughts plus belief thoughts so let's suggest a note here thoughts plus belief is a simple metaphor for mind thoughts plus belief in those thoughts is a simple metaphor for mind or ego mind to take the memory part away essentially taking that out of the equation and use your awareness starts to open up to recognize this deeper presence so what I just now look at a few of the comments and just offer a bit of insight on those so Nicole Amber said loving awareness and John has said nothing personal apparently my ego is not impressed with that and Polly said energy and light they be said energy aware and D has said open awareness to who am I and second she heard be silence as in no sound so loving awareness actually this is a really good arising because awareness is indeed loving and it's not loving in the kind of romantic sense actually that which we call love and the true nature of love actually is what I call the perfume of the infinite silence gratitude so loving awareness is a great thing for you to have got Nicole from that because that is the net it's like a flower has a perfume love peace grace are perfumes of infinite silence looking at John's he said nothing personal apparently and this is so true you see we're so focused on the identity as this body mind that actually we forget that for even for this to exist there has to be a non-personal state or essence to the awareness and he also added the ego wasn't impressed with that and it couldn't be because ego is always trying to get in on the act and always trying basically on a journey of self-preservation that's a small s self-preservation it goes always trying to preserve that by it's likely to resist so John got a recognition that the ego was not impressed with this idea of taking away its identity it won't die the ego has a function but it's the identification with the ego that's a very important word and the attachment to it and the belief in it as to who you are most important word there is belief that causes all of the suffering but when that drops and the awareness is simply recognized that that's the point at which the suffering dissolves so this the ego doesn't like because he equates this realization of the self as infinite awareness or infinite consciousness or infinite silence with death the death of its identity and it equates that with the death of the body vehicle but actually it's not the death of the body vehicle it's simply the death of identification with a small idea of who you really are so that's the reason why the ego is not impressed with this process looking at some more comments these mentioned open awareness and then she's got second I heard be and silence as in no sound and it's not actually just as I mentioned earlier silence is infinite silence it's the absence of all phenomena this is very very important in self realization not just sound but the absence of all phenomena for there to be any phenomena there has to be an essence that is absent of all phenomena and that includes time space form being from which all phenomena arise you think about it logically that actually makes sense because then all vibration and everything ultimately is vibration must automatically return to silence so let's just look at a few more the comments patties got silence that's great news patties and delighted you got that what's just looking at clint's here social justice in nh it with fear ah hit with fear quaver on the second question so what this is showing us clint is is actually part of the process I was pointing at that in relation to john's experience you see as as one starts to open up to this infinite silence or infinite awareness the identity of the ego mind doesn't like it and actually live typically lives in fear of that because of the its equation with its dissolution and perceives itself to be dying so the reason a fear wave will arise is because it's there's a cut there's a seeing that started to open up and the ego has perceived its days are numbered in charge front and centre stage and this will bring up a phenomena which we call fear in the body but if we let that phenomena arise and simply watch it no matter how intense it might be what will actually happen is the silent awareness will look at that and see that and it will transform and transmute it back to silence without any effort on your part without any effort on your part now I'm going to be looking at that particular thing I've just stated there that insight there in much greater depth as part of the ongoing live stream self-realization program in 2022 begins on the 1st of January I call that process transmuting fear into love and we're going to look at that in stages throughout that program but I'm going to look at that is very very important what I've just said there in a few words but simply this witnessing of the phenomena arising and then letting that happen is naturally going to take you on a journey to silence and stillness so this is a very important thing that Clint has shared there about this fear arising it will happen as part of the realization process but if you understand what's happening then you don't need to live in fear of the fear if you see what I mean on the who am I without Maria like myself and said wow what the hell happened to get into this physical state and then looked at myself yeah that's that's also a really good awareness to share there that Todd because sometimes and it didn't no matter how long you've been meditating unless you've actually asked this question in any should we say seriousness it can be quite revelatory to go whoa there's more to life than this physical body there is more to life than this physical body there's nothing wrong with the physical body because it allows you to experience and express life and actually allows the greatest realization of life to emerge for without this physical form that realization wouldn't get to experience itself and then realize itself as the infinite awareness or the infinite silence so this that you're talking about plotting to point out there what the hell happened to get into this physical state this physical expression actually a simple pointing there is that the universe let's call it that the infinite silence the infinite conscious actually at some level chose let's put it that way to express itself as stars planets all life forms to come to know itself in its own experience for without that there would be no phenomena there would be no time no space no form that would just simply be awareness infinite awareness or infinite silence aware of itself as that so in order to experience itself the universe creates this incredible if you like trick to first bring forth beingness then form and creates the trial of consciousness beingness form your body physical phenomena and infinite awareness and the interaction of these three is what creates the experience that we have in the physical and then in the physical domain and they're not separate from one another so if you ever wondered why you're here in this body it's simply for this to realize experientially that which you truly are and you'll do that in a way and a time that's perfect and right for you there's no wrong or right way for this to emerge so in engaging in your meditation practice your spiritual practice the ultimate end point if you like of that journey is the realization of that which never left one insight when I was reflecting on sharing this with people a few years ago on a flight back home from a holiday I was starting with the words in my consciousness of in the beginning and as I close my eyes to recognize the silence there the words that next emerged were this so we started with in the beginning was the end in the beginning was the end what that means is the beginning and the end are like the alpha and the omega in the Greek alphabet it is one and the same oh my gosh I have been this infinite field of consciousness or infinite field of awareness forever for all of eternity and the embodiment in this form has led to a forgetting of that and then a coming back to the realization of this like the hero's journey if you've heard of Joseph Joseph Campbell it's like this life in this form is like a hero journey we go out on an outward journey and eventually come back to the place we started the recognition that we are life itself we collectively are life itself and this life this infinite silence this infinite consciousness or infinite awareness is eternal and you don't the beautify beauty of this is that actually you don't need to believe anything I say about it because when it's realized it's unequivocal unmissable it is the clearest clarity that one will ever have about anything and actually it's not personal and from that the peace the grace the love the gratitude the silence the stillness these are the perfumes like the perfumes of a flower that naturally arise from that now that little exercise we just did I would highly recommend you use that in your meditation practice and the more you get used to using it the more you'll start to open up and eventually you'll be able to get to the point where you just don't need to go to the word who a deeper awareness will be a present and then you'll move even beyond that and it will simply be a recognition that this unchanging awareness this unchanging field of stillness has not moved in all of eternity and in front of it and I mentioned last time the green screen of consciousness all the phenomena including your physical form appeared just like in the movies you can project anything onto a green screen it's like that consciousness so all of these phenomena all of these expressions appear and eventually they simply return naturally to silence to stillness effortlessly and it's in the when we stop efforting to get to that stop believing in what I call the case of mistake mistaken identity as the body mind that the realization appears or flowers so I hope that all makes sense so just one other metaphor I referred to last time and I'll mention it again another way of looking at it apart from the fiber optic lamp just you can see on the screen there in the background is to think of it like a diamond a diamond have that has many facets and each one of these facets is to say like a you know an individual human being for instance and we get to experience the beauty of a diamond with the light glinting off the surface but notice all of the facets are connected to the whole diamond and they're not separate from it and the luminosity of the diamond which is the universe in the metaphor comes from within and that luminosity arises from the power of infinite awareness or infinite consciousness that you are you we all collectively are always have been always will be and this is and it is this that is seen and it is this for this purpose and this purpose alone ultimately that you are here you may take many journey points and they're all beautiful because they're all leading you to this realization so the reason I call it a journey to silence we will experience it over time as a journey we will gradually deepen deepen deepen deepen until one day when the beingness is ripe then this realization effortlessly and I do mean effortlessly and naturally flowers and it will simply be seen that not only are you life but actually you are in fact a living meditation a living meditation and thus the purpose of all your meditative practice is to increase your openness readiness and ripeness for this that's all but that's a very very big goal it's an infinite all and there is no greater realization than this and again just to emphasize there's nothing that you need to believe I say about this because when it's realized you will see that it is before and beyond belief it is before and beyond belief so sometimes I express it this way truth as in ultimate truth is unbelievable and that's kind of like a humorous way of saying it's before and beyond belief it doesn't require the energy of belief there is no thing for it is no thing yet infinite for you to believe in you simply are that always have been always will be it is ultimately so simple and so powerful and so profound the mind goes it can't be that simple surely there's something I have to do to be this to get this and actually the answer is no mind will never get it and it will never get it because simply you are already it and it's the dropping of that identification that attachment that belief totally and only cover plea that lets the realization of life flower like this like this and now enough words for now what I'd like to do is just take you on a meditation journey using the infinite silence meditation there are seven versions of this in fact there's even eight on my profile on insight timer but the seven that have been most recently uploaded vary from a quarter of an hour to an hour and a half the first one is fully guided almost complete guidance the hour and a half comparatively has very relatively little guidance it's still the same pointings the purpose is for you to use these in stages so you become familiar with recognizing this unchanging awareness within and the more effect if you get at that the less you'll need to use my guidance and the more it will just naturally be there so you can use them over seven days seven weeks seven months seven years whatever it takes you're here for this and this meditation emerged as part of the realization and it's what I call an awareness based meditation it's to take you out of the phenomenal world all the phenomena thoughts feelings emotions sensations into that unchanging essence that's what meditation is about so let's do this meditation now I'll be using a couple of key terms spheres of light this infinite I am this pure being just go with that I might say as spheres of light or just simply spheres just be open to that nothing you need to do just be open when I say that and then I'll use the term infinite silence which I've explained several times already it's a phrase that emerged in the realization for infinite awareness or infinite consciousness so let's close our eyes again and simply bring your attention to your body there may be physical sensations the breath there may be emotions just simply silently notice they are there without judgment without analysis and then just simply be open from your heart to the experience of spheres of light or simply the spheres nothing for you to do just be open just aware now of this state I am I am remembering that this I is a non-personal infinite I universal being recognizing that even this is a phenomenon it can be witnessed sensed an aliveness and this that sees the state I am is the silent witness so just allowing the attention to dissolve merge with this silent witnessing presence it's a little bit like you dived into the ocean and all has become still and silent and the waves of the ocean are appearing being watched and you as the silent witness like a sliver of ice are dissolving melting merging with the water effortlessly silently forming one with the water and the water is an ocean of infinite silence deeper stillness infinite silence be still well in silence you will realize your truth in truth you will realize you are silence infinite silence this rarified atmosphere of silence transforms transmutes dissolves all phenomena like a universal solvent all that remains is silence infinite silence infinite awareness eternity itself life eternal always this unchanging,

Unmoving,

Unblemished essence the invitation of life is to be still and know always this that one already is and in a moment I will ring the tingsha bells three times just keep your eyes closed for now and as the sound of the bowels has gently faded away the silent awareness remains untouched and unmoved and all phenomena are simply appearing like watching a movie from the inside trusting this silent awareness alone becomes the knowing,

The realizing aware of your body the chair you're sat in or whatever you may be lay on the silent awareness remaining untouched and unmoved and whenever the moment is right for you gently and silently opening your eyes good good so that was a guided version of the infinite silence meditation the simplest version of that is simply to be open to that which is here presence the infinite silence all the other pointings all the other words of guidance you will experience as steps as recognizing the depth the infinite depth of that one awareness so just to remind you there are seven versions of that on my profile on insight timer from quarter of an hour highly guided through to an hour and a half the highly guided one gets you to move through those steps and start to recognize that awareness that is present and then as you move on from each one you'll start to become more familiar with it and deepen and an awareness-based meditation is the most powerful form of meditation you can have because you are infinite awareness and you don't need to believe me on that this will be seen it's about moving from phenomena to a silence that is beyond phenomena and hence those pointings and hence those steps starting on new year's day january 2022 8 p.

M uk time so same time as this but for a bit longer an hour and a half there are 11 to 11 weekly starting on saturday i think it is the 1st of january then wednesday and then saturday and then wednesday for 11 parts i've called it nothing special enlightenment and then each one has its own title like who am i really exploration of belief exploration of belief and its impact upon the realization of the self and the fact that it's actually the limiting factor more exploration of infinite silence the transmuting fear into love which is very very important in dissolving the emotional body which is a big block to the realization of the self life's questions so people have asked me thousands of questions over the years so i'll be looking at the nature of spiritual inquiry and what that really is and how you can use that effectively and use this meditation to be able to answer those questions for yourself trusting the heart not just your physical heart but the heart of the universe so we'll have a session on that another question that people come up with a lot is am i on the right path so we'll look at that in depth we will look at emotions in depth and blocks and actually the fact that they're invitations to a deeper truth we will look at relationships relationships are great fora for spiritual depth and opening to truth so we'll look at relationships Kundalini lots of people talk about Kundalini energy but actually in my experience very few people understand what it's all about so we'll have a session on that and then the final session i'm calling life meditation living life as a meditation not just when you sit down for five ten fifteen twenty minutes or whatever but life as a meditation so it's an 11 part journey in-depth journey looking at various aspects of spiritual self-realization so that starts as i say in a few days time first of january what a great way to start the new year all of the program is on insight timer and i'm very grateful for insight time and the new audience i'm reaching here having done hundreds of streams elsewhere and events in both in person and online around the world great opportunity to share on insight time i'm very grateful for all the donations very generous donations thank you for that it helps insight is a great platform with 20 million users elsewhere share what they do with the many people sharing various messages on there helping people live more peaceful more centered lives and it helps me in sharing this message with you and reach people around the globe right from the land down under in australia to as far north as iceland have been and all points east and west so thank you for that i really appreciate that and on behalf of insight time thank you so much for those donations as part of this 11 part journey i welcome questions at any point so if you've got a question at any point then you can pop it into the comment box uh whether it's related to what we're talking about then or if it's some other thing and i will and i will address it and if it's going to be explored in greater depth in a later session then i'll perhaps give an initial response and say that we'll look at that further you know at the next session or a future session or whatever i welcome that because what i found from the thousands of questions that have been asked over the years is that one person's question is everybody's question so people will often say to me i didn't even know i had that question but now it's been answered so that's that's part of the importance of spiritual inquiry there are two prongs really to the spiritual journey does the the what we call the practice of meditation and then the inquiry the inquiry part which is really looking at that question who am i but people have many questions related around their spiritual journey in life and why there are struggles in life and so forth so those questions as part of this 11 part journey are very welcome because it's through that inquiry and i'll be talking in depth about the nature of spiritual inquiry and how to use it effectively that we those two wings become one and we realize we realize the essence of that which we've all been looking for and all are looking for even if they're not aware that they're looking for and all are here to realize this so that whole journey is about that spiritual inquiry is very central element to it it goes hand in hand with your meditation and when you can integrate those two then we're really onto game changing moving into an awareness-based meditation is game changer number one spiritual inquiry if you like is game changer number two actually they're not separate so that's the journey we're going to embark upon you're welcome to join i hope that some of you will if you feel cold from your heart then do join us i am i discovered as i say after the last session that they don't do automatic replays on insight timer which was a bit dismaying fortunately i have the audio um and i've taken that down from the last session a week ago and mounted it as a track on insight timer so i'll do the same with this one so that once they start republishing in mid-january those audios will be available for replay i'm hoping at some point they will allow the replay of the videos as well because one thing i would say is that don't just listen to these ones listen to them again and again because each time you will get something different there are people watching this stream that i know i've been to many sessions with me both in person online and they tell me having listened again i've got so much more so it's through that repetition that you'll really start to open yourself up so i'll be mounting the audio is on the sync tracks as replays of the lives and i'm hoping at some point they will allow access for you to see the video i can see it but apparently you can't the replay which is a bit odd but anyway it is what it is fortunately we can we can make the audios available so i think that's pretty much everything i would say other than say thank you so much for joining i hope you enjoy the rest of 2021 and you feel the call to the invitation to join this 11 part program into 2022 it's a pretty intense like twice a week for well essentially six weeks 11 parts that will be going on and depending on how that goes we almost certainly do more streams after that to explore other aspects that people won't take further so that's pretty much it from me uh we've run over the hour a bit very grateful for the donations i'll leave you with a little bit more of the harp