Right from the beginning tonight,
Exploring this topic of faith,
Confidence,
And of course because we're exploring this topic from the point of view of the Buddhist teachings,
And of course it's going to be something very direct,
Very immediate,
Something like do we feel safe in our own skin?
Is it safe to be connected with our experience?
And you don't have to impose any answer to that question,
But just being really respectful of the question,
Is it safe?
Can I trust this experience,
This experience of being sensitive to the way that it is right now?
Can I trust this?
And of course as we settle and make any adjustments that might need to be made,
At least at times one of the distinct obvious aspects of our experience is a profound sense of not knowing,
Not knowing what I'm supposed to be doing or not knowing what this is,
Even this experience of being sensitive,
Not knowing how to define it.
So can that be trusted,
That not knowing,
Not knowing in the sense of not knowing how to define it,
Not knowing how to tell myself a story about who I am and what's happening.
Can we have confidence that this uncertainty,
We don't need to try to fill that void or fix that uncertainty?
Confidence that this experience can be left undefined and open,
Not fixed.
Okay.
So easy to think that we have to get somewhere or fix something or have a particular kind of experience.
This very ancient presumption,
This conviction,
This faith that the mind often has that life is a struggle.
It's just the right,
The important question is how to struggle,
Not whether we need to struggle or not.
So just notice that in our sit tonight,
The habitual confidence you can notice in the mind that struggle is important,
I need to struggle.
Especially in those moments when you've been distracted and then all of a sudden the mind is aware again.
You might notice that habit,
Okay,
I've got to get my act together.
How to make effort,
How to struggle,
How to do what I'm supposed to do.
Don't assume that that's completely wrong,
That instinct or that habit,
But just begin to notice it.
And the presumption that the mind knows how to make effort or what to do or how to struggle.
So tonight I thought it would be useful to take a few minutes at least,
Some of you might take longer.
But in a very simple and kind way to review for your mind as if you're talking directly to your heart,
What the mind understands about taking care of itself.
We have this time,
This meditation period,
Presumably we're all interested in a resonant happiness,
The happiness of release,
The release of stress.
Just begin to review.
What do I know about the experience and the causes for stress and what do I know about the experience and the causes for release?
Be prepared if you find,
Hear yourself saying something,
Just ask in a really kind way,
Do I really know this to be true?
Is this me just parodying something I've heard?
Or is there a lot of confidence,
A lot of faith in the rightness of what I'm saying to myself?
And remember even knowing that you don't know can be a very powerful experience of faith.
That can be a huge powerful step.
I know that I don't know.
But others might have some clarity that has come out of your years of practice.
And as you clarify causes for release,
Causes for stress,
Then naturally observe how the mind begins to act on what the mind has confidence in.
Remember this can be very simple like,
Oh honey,
You don't need to think about that now.
You don't need to worry about that now.
You can put that down and simply notice the sounds coming and going.
So that might be an instruction where you see a lot of confidence.
Like I'm pretty sure I don't need to do that.
Don't need to think that.
Don't need to obsess here.
What do I know to be true?
What has life and meditation practice studying the mind?
It is the cumulative understanding at this time.
What do I know about taking care of my heart at this time?
And then just see what comes to mind.
And then immediately experiment with what you're saying to yourself and see if your actual experience backs up the conclusion the mind had.
So we'll continue in silence now for a while.
We can hear you?
.
.
I want to tell this to become a very simple and natural exploration.
What do I know at this time?
What do I know about planting seeds that lead onward to release and happiness?
What do I know about activities,
Ways of relating that lead to stressful bound up states?
And we remember to value what doesn't work,
The confidence in what doesn't work just as much as we value confidence in what we've learned does help.
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