Soul Retrieval - When Your Soul Comes Knocking...

Okay,

So I was talking about how a pregnant woman has one eye on her inner experience and one eye on the outside.

Most of us walk around with two eyes on the outside and lots of us are actually numb to our inner experience.

Now,

When we start to become less numb,

It can hurt and actually become quite shocking.

So,

Soul retrieval,

The whole issue of soul retrieval,

It needs to be handled very gently,

But deeply,

With kind of a loving mothering energy that helps make us feel safe enough to acknowledge the parts of ourselves we've left behind.

Because this is what's happened to us.

We've left a lot of ourselves behind.

And a soul retrieval is the process of going back,

Just temporarily going back to pick up something that we left behind.

And when we bring it in,

It changes everything.

If you think of like a kaleidoscope.

When you bring in some part of yourself that's been left behind.

It's like it turns the kaleidoscope.

So that a new,

So that all the pieces are reorganized in a new way.

And that new way is a kind of quantum leap we make when we experience a real soul retrieval.

And we will be taken basically from,

You know,

The world is ending,

My life is a mess,

To,

Oh,

I'm clearer than I thought.

Life's better than I thought.

Before a soul retrieval,

When our soul steering us towards one,

It's like think of looking through a kaleidoscope and everything looks dark.

And then we're brought down to this part of us we left behind and we pick it up,

Allow it back in,

And then the kaleidoscope is full of bright colors.

We will go through this process over and over again.

And this really spiritual training is walking with someone until they learn how to do this process safely.

Or even know that it can be done.

I'm sending love to all your hearts,

I can feel your gentle,

You know,

You might feel fragile hearts,

They're not fragile at all,

They're just kind of vulnerable,

The vulnerable part of the loving human being.

Okay,

There's something I really want you to understand.

That is,

And maybe you've heard me say it before,

But it might come through more clearly now to you.

In ancient times,

You know,

Our moms would carry us for a couple of years,

And while they were busy doing chores or working in the fields,

We'd be on their backs.

They'd be talking to us,

There'd be little groups of people and we would,

As little toddlers,

We would start running,

You know,

From person to person with other little kids around,

But it was a very kind of safe place with a lot of people who were partial to us,

Who were oriented towards responding to us,

Who were happy to be interrupted.

Okay,

Now,

By about six,

With that kind of an upbringing,

You know,

Abraham would say,

You can let go of the hand,

Meaning that the child is bonded enough to their,

True self,

That they can,

You know,

Steer themselves a lot.

Okay,

So we don't pay any attention about this.

And,

And so as a result,

We're still working with our wounded children in their 30s,

Because we don't pay attention to this period.

So,

Most of us,

We didn't have that kind of an upbringing.

Now,

The patterns associated with this for thousands and thousands of years are incredibly subtle.

They're so subtle that it's easy for us in modern day to say those patterns don't exist.

They have no power,

But actually,

They have enormous power.

And when they're not met,

The child is left with a vacuum,

Which tends to get filled with fear and alienation and separation.

So,

Remember when I'm saying all this,

This is the state of the world.

This is why we're in such trouble.

And at this time,

It is possible to heal.

With just the attitude of looking at everything that happens,

Like it's a soul retrieval,

Like it's your education,

You are being shown how to embrace how you are and make room for who you were born to be.

Okay,

Now,

Listen,

That's really key.

You embrace who you are in a love embrace,

And yet you make room for who you're born to be.

And that kind of attitude,

As you sort of steer that way,

And it over time becomes your attitude,

It will create the fastest moving trajectory for your dreams coming true.

It's easy for me to love you.

And to see how beautiful you are.

And where,

You know,

You might feel like your ego is getting in the way.

I just see it like we all start off as kind of abused children,

All of us start off alienated to our true nature.

And it's nobody's fault.

It's just what we're faced with right now.

And it comes in part from what I talked about,

You know,

One of my favourite topics that the feminine energy is not valued enough.

And so this is why this situation is happening,

Because we're not valuing the feminine realm of,

You know,

Pregnancy and early child rearing.

You understand that just by turning up for this,

And or watching it later,

You will,

You're opening the door to your true energy.

And please learn how to say,

May it come in as gently as possible with as much support as I need.

Because if you say that to the universe,

The universe will hear it.

And you will get it gently.

You know,

My years where I had such difficulty,

I had,

You know,

The zero to 100 attitude.

It was kind of like,

It was like I dealt with it like,

I don't know.

I was very extreme,

But if I had the attitude of the may it be gentle as possible,

And as supported as possible,

It would have been totally different for me.

But I was so alienated from the universe that I didn't understand that,

That were heard and responded to.

You know,

This is a big session somehow last night,

I,

I had a tumultuous night.

And in the morning woke up with this incredible,

Incredible kind of off the charts yearning to unite with God,

You know.

Here in the physical even more,

However much I've gone,

But just more.

So,

May this yearning be transmitted to you.

Because,

I tell you,

Part of you is already yearning,

Yearning for this.

And,

But often we're numbed out to this part of us.

That so wants to allow love and truth into our minds and bodies.

And to gradually allow our minds to dissolve.

You know,

In the East,

They,

They call it mind we,

We say ego,

And in the East,

They say it's mind and mind is actually bigger than the ego.

So,

The mind is also how you experience Mother Nature.

How you experience breathing.

It's your full,

It's a source of all your thoughts,

Basically.

And so when the mind dissolves or the ego dissolves and you have silence,

And as your ego and mind gets smaller,

You get more and more silence,

More and more peace.

As all these parts of yourself,

Come back,

And you make room for them in your heart.

Now listen,

In case you didn't know,

But you probably know.

When you're picking up parts of yourself you left behind,

They are repulsive.

It's just like a child who's just covered in grime,

Hasn't had a bath in two years,

Never been treated well.

It's kind of,

You know,

Hostile and aggressive,

And untrusting.

Sort of like trying to love a child like that.

That's what it's like when we bring these parts back.

It's often like our worst nightmare.

Seems like our worst nightmare,

Or something that we you know really wanted to avoid.

I mean,

I remember with the boys when they started off at Waldorf and I remember it was like my worst nightmare for them,

You know that I'd be so alienated from this system that I'd be homeschooling them,

And I was really scared of that.

I was really scared of being so far out that I homeschooled my kids and of course it happened.

And,

You know,

By the time it happened I was really happy to homeschool them.

I embraced more and more of my soul,

More and more of my true nature.

And that's why like what looks like bad news becomes good news.

So I'm feeling in you all.

It's like a desire and developing willingness to feel.

It's like the birth of feeling,

You know,

Our soul communicates through feeling.

You know,

We'll get the feeling to do something,

We'll get the feeling about somebody.

That's soul.

Okay,

Just knowing that will help you.

So I'm feeling that you guys are all making more room to hear your feeling,

To contact your deeper feeling.

It's actually what you're all,

All of you are moving into more respect for yourselves.

And so you're opening to put your arms around your feeling more around the true data that you're getting.

Right.

Because,

You know,

Getting ungrounded which I'm sure all of us know what that feels like.

That happens when we're scared to know what we really think and really feel.

And when we're ungrounded,

It makes us kind of silly,

Stupid,

It makes us like blind to data.

It's,

You know,

Without a solid connection to the ground,

We can topple easily.

I can feel how much you guys don't want to topple.

So,

Then it's to have the courage to stay with your feeling.

You know,

Soul retrievals are really kind of like surfing.

You're just,

You know,

Something happens to you,

It's kind of like a wave of something hits you.

And the more,

You know,

Sort of,

I don't know,

Economic trouble,

Relationship trouble,

Whatever.

And the more you can flow with it and go,

Okay,

This is coming to help me,

The more you can surf the wave and almost enjoy it.

The more surrendered you get,

The more you enjoy these waves.

Or at least become neutral.

Because you go like whatever is happening and whatever the outcome,

It's part of a soul retrieval,

It's part of my education.

See,

You guys,

We think we're real and we're not,

You know,

We're just like dream figures,

Part of a hologram.

What's eternal in us is what we're feeling.

Our feeling comes from what's eternal.

I'm not talking about feeling emotions,

I'm talking about our feelings about things.

It's coming from our eternal part and it is also the realm of the feminine to feel like that,

To feel,

You know,

To be in touch with feeling,

To pay attention to feeling.

And this is why,

Like with the feminine energy not being particularly respected,

It hurts us.

It hurts women particularly to be out of touch with their feeling.

So don't allow it.

You know,

You can become like an ancient human being in this 21st century world.

It's where I function.

I can cope with everything.

That's it.

That's it,

You too.

You are already an ancient being.

You are the fulfillment of thousands and thousands and thousands of generations and years of human experience.

You're the culmination of humanity.

And it's just a matter of putting your almost your left arm out to embrace all the realm of your feminine side that's been neglected and this bigger ancient understanding.

And the spiritual realm comes in through the feminine side.

So we grow.

We make these spiritual shifts of understanding through our feminine.

And it's still what we really need our masculine.

It's all good.

It's all good.

I'm just emphasizing the feminine because it's so neglected.

You know,

I want to put a big red flag here on something.

It's something that I've seen in so many students like that gets in the way.

And it is an underlying attitude of what's in it for me.

Yeah.

It's just kind of a knee jerk.

Okay,

What's in it for me?

And the thing is that,

You know,

Our me is basically illusory.

And when we think that way,

Anything that comes to us will basically be temporarily satisfied.

But if we can go forward with how can I serve?

And how can I self purify?

Then we can have our dreams come true without selling our souls.

Now,

You know,

Maybe all of us have trouble with the self purifying,

Because we all start off going like,

You know,

I'm an angel food cake,

Everybody else is like a devil's food cake,

But I'm the angel food cake.

So,

You know,

Being willing to see your own darkness,

You know,

And give it over.

But on the other hand,

We can be too much looking for our own darkness.

Okay,

So you don't want to do that.

I mean,

I've done that lots.

It's a mixture of like desire to self purify and having faith in yourself.

But this,

What's in it for me is just like I just see people tripping and falling all over the place with this.

Whatever you give will come back to you.

If when you give what,

You know,

Amma says it's the soap that cleanses us.

So,

You know,

What happened to me would be lots like I'd be working helping people,

And then,

You know,

I realized that I was helping them too much,

And that they needed to,

You know,

I get sort of pushed back by their ego or,

And then I'd be sort of thrown back on myself.

And then I'd,

I'd purify,

I'd become clear.

I'd see like,

Oh yeah,

You can't,

I can't over help people.

We need to help themselves more,

Or whatever it was,

Or sometimes I saw like a grabbyness in myself.

It's because I gave that,

That,

Then the love comes back and it would show me my impurities,

Or it would show me my strengths.

You know,

The way of the Tao,

If we live like the Tao Lo Zou was,

You know,

He was a Christ figure back in China,

In ancient times,

And he wrote,

He said,

You know,

Words,

You can't get there through words,

But somebody asked him to,

You know,

Leave a book before he cycled off.

And so he did.

And it's the way of the Tao is the simplest account of truth,

The most unblemished account of truth.

I think there is.

In the way of the Tao,

You go forward with an open heart and an open mind.

And then,

You know,

When you do that,

Your whole life becomes like a big soul retrieval.

You know,

You're always working with your,

With giving and then also,

You know,

Self purifying.

And,

You know,

The soul retrievals,

What happens is,

You know,

Okay,

In the way of the Tao,

They say,

If you want to get rid of something,

Allow it to get very big.

And the whole thing will be just before it leaves.

So it's the same with us,

You guys.

So you might be going through a period where you're just seeing say you're where you sabotage yourself or,

You know,

Whatever it is or darkness just comes up and it just fills up your whole vision.

Everything looks so dreary and,

You know,

Terrible.

So it's the darkness is getting really big.

And it's by,

You know,

It gets really big.

You keep up basically an attitude of prayer.

Help me,

Help me,

Help me with this.

And it will start to get smaller and smaller and disappear.

And suddenly you will be more illuminated.

Your understanding will go up.

And it's kind of having the courage to walk through those really wobbly periods.

To take care of yourself,

To do what you need for yourself.

You know,

I'm go siyama.

And yet,

There's a very deeply and all of you,

There's a question about whether you're good enough coming up,

And you are.

That's it.

There's a feeling of futility coming up to around.

Oh,

It's sort of like,

Is it ever going to be solved?

Is there any way through this life that can live it in a really valuable way?

See,

Part of the magic of this is I'm just putting words to some of your really deep material going on that is obstructing you on deeper levels.

And so I'm putting words to it.

And so it's clearing.

And so what will happen is,

After this talk,

It will show itself.

It will come up gradually,

It will just come up in your life,

And you will move through it.

Because actually,

You've already moved through it right now in your blueprint.

Some of you are doubting yourselves.

I read a.

.

.

No,

I heard somebody was talking about with the socialization of children,

That these experiments,

And they just recording parents,

And the parents were far more to the female students,

The female children,

They're far more likely to say,

Oh,

Be careful,

Don't fall,

Than they were to the males.

That's kind of what I'm feeling in you.

It's kind of like,

Oh,

This is allowed.

Oh,

It's like,

Yes,

It's allowed.

We have to be brave.

And if we didn't learn how to be brave when we were young,

We have to learn when we're older.

That's it.

Women are incredibly resilient.

And men too.

But women give birth and,

You know,

We,

You know,

Maybe we're in a village and the marauders came and they killed our husbands and we had to like go off with the new guys and,

You know,

So they didn't kill our kids and we had to deal.

Women couldn't,

You know,

Get through anything.

There's a real love power wanting to be born here.

And you're banging up against some old beliefs.

This is I can feel it in everybody,

Beliefs.

They're more,

Not quite Old Testament,

But harsher,

Harsher,

Kind of.

It's like what I'm talking about with these women in the time with the marauders and like having to cope.

It's like,

You know,

It's pretty black and white.

They did it or you died.

Kind of like that.

And it's as if what you're forgetting right now is you can call on God right now.

This is a time when the energy of the universe is really available for us.

That's it.

It's a time of great polarization.

So if you're turning toward love,

Seeking love to express love,

Unconditional love,

You get helped.

You know,

180 percent,

A thousand percent.

Because,

You know,

For the survival of the human race,

For,

You know,

Our souls,

I mean,

We're the children of our souls.

I mean,

They just love us like way off the charts.

So when you turn toward your soul energy with an attitude of surrender,

You just get colossal help.

And half of our problem is we have to open our minds to allow the gift of how much our souls want to help us and heal us.

And maybe some of you might be feeling something happening in your base chakra as we're talking around,

You know,

The survival energy and basically,

You know,

Will my true energy be supported here?

Yes,

It can be.

You just have to learn to allow it.

That's it.

That's it.

OK,

A big flag here around the key to soul retrievals is to allow.

So when these parts of ourselves that have been long neglected or rejected,

When they come in,

Our ego mind will start yapping away with,

Oh,

I'm so bad,

I'm so clumsy,

I'm so whatever.

I'm such a mess.

We just have to allow that.

Allow that self-hatred to surface without trying not to buy into it.

Part of you might buy into it a bit,

But just keep holding this,

Holding the space for what your soul is wanting for you.

But your soul's wanting to bring you.

Like even make sense,

Even make space for,

You know.

The terrible,

Ugly spots like don't,

You know,

Try not to buy into them.

But when stuff is clearing,

It's,

You know,

It's pretty.

It's like manure.

It's like the mud of the lotus.

It's like repellent.

It's like little children who've been horribly dirty and maybe covered with feces and they're not attractive.

You know,

Be patient,

Patient,

Actually lead them to the bathroom.

If you judge them,

You won't get anywhere with them.

You have to love them.

You have to love the things in yourself that you just find incredibly repellent.

Because it just came from basically disruption with the bonding,

This life and then patterns from other lives that you're not responsible for.

You're responsible for allowing the human,

But you as a personality did not do what people,

You know,

Parts,

You know,

Other lives,

What you did in other lives.

You know,

Our era,

If there's a new breakthrough in something,

Immediately what will happen is there will be moved to tax it and surround it with rules.

See,

We have trouble just letting things grow without interference.

We're really big on measuring and controlling.

So this is what we do to ourselves,

You guys.

And,

You know,

I'm gonna say this big shift we're in is a return to the nurturing female.

And basically we have to over time,

You have to learn how to become like this incredibly loving mother to yourself.

This flappable mother who just loves you through thick and thin,

No matter what you do.

And,

You know,

If you know Ama,

That's great,

But also you have to do it for yourself.

And so,

You know,

The mental distress,

Mental illness,

Nervous breakdown is all soul retrieval.

Now in the East,

They say mental illness is just a transition state to a bigger spiritual understanding.

So we tend to freeze it.

Freeze people in it.

Freeze ourselves in it.

Each car has a speed that if you drive that car at that particular speed,

It will start to fall apart.

So you either have to go below that speed or go above it.

So with any mental distress,

You either will be pushed down towards,

You know,

Pills,

Diagnosis,

Getting used to living as an invalid or going right through it.

Seeing it as a soul retrieval and coming to an expanded,

Rounded,

Balanced life over time.

So don't make any kind of mental distress part of your identity.

It's really important,

Especially for people in their 30s.

There's this wave of from our culture that's just it's pseudo love.

It's like pretending to be caring.

You know about this mental distress,

But it's like,

You know,

It's not.

Not caring at all.

It's coming from control.

You know,

Have your identity be I'm a divine being in human form.

You know,

I might have insomnia or I might have anxiety attacks sometimes,

But.

But it's really neither here nor there.

It's all solvable in surrender to truth.

That's that's my example.

That's what I've lived.

There's another part of this,

Which is.

You know,

We can expect sometimes because just because we got hurt,

We can expect that loving means that we're going to get damaged.

Because that's what the child,

You know,

Tried to bond to the flawed parents,

You know.

Experience.

So when we turn in love,

We can.

We can be terrified because we're going to.

Of our hearts broken or be damaged somehow.

If we don't protect ourselves.

And really,

You know,

With loving,

We're not damaged.

It's like.

What happens is when we love our our own wounding comes up to be healed.

So even if a friend or lover,

You know.

Does the worst and it's a total betrayal,

It's just healing us of how our own egos.

It's our egos that actually are the betrayers,

Because when you're launched in your soul energy,

You just are living in unconditional love,

And so nobody can take anything from you.

Nobody can really hurt you because you're.

So just.

You are love.

How can you hurt love?

You can't.

So it's our job over time to become more and more like that.

And,

You know,

We don't.

We can't see how our egos betray us.

It's only when we see it reflected where we get betrayed that we'll see what inside is happening to us.

You know,

Then victimhood.

In our cultures,

You know,

This can encourage us to be like victims with this kind of phony love and concern.

And it's like there are no victims.

We're just getting basically back what our ego does to our soul,

And we get our own karma coming back.

So it's not to blame ourselves,

But.

You know,

A victim place is just kind of like it's the I don't want to grow chair.

And it's not very safe.

You know,

One of the things I noticed in my life is everybody gets tired of victims and,

You know,

You get abandoned and you get abandoned because really your own ego is abandoning your soul.

So that's why you get abandoned in the in the outer life.

You know,

However,

Your life is is basically a snapshot.

What you're doing to your soul.

Or a snapshot of.

The state of your soul.

It's just kind of.

A nonverbal picture of your state of being.

Now,

Think of it like that.

You know,

Real spiritual growth,

It takes time.

And our lives are complicated.

We have to earn our living mostly.

And we're in this.

You know.

Whatever midnight of Kali Yuga,

We're,

You know,

Kind of the culmination of the darkest time.

So we could like have some patience and.

Self forgiveness,

You know.

We're not really expected to ace it,

You know,

We're expected to just do our best.

Yeah,

Okay,

Forgiveness,

Self forgiveness.

Please,

I'm seeing,

You know,

I'm seeing interesting.

I'm seeing your soul.

This is all of you.

Your souls are wanting you to get the self forgiveness more.

And it's like trying to come in and trying to like.

Root in you more.

It's trying to root in your earthly reality more.

Okay,

Please like open your ears to this.

Get this.

It's trying to connect up with your earthly reality.

This this whole energy of a.

It's very golden of self forgiveness.

So you can seamlessly move into self forgiveness,

Please.

What I'm seeing is this kind of a darkness that's kind of walling it off.

So this is your mistaken beliefs about yourself or about life.

It's where you,

You know,

Having trouble loving yourself,

Having trouble loving life.

And you can forgive yourself for that.

Okay,

Good.

Okay,

Good.

Good is coming in.

Even if you can't feel it,

I can see it in all of you.

Wouldn't it be nice to walk around with more self forgiveness?

Then you wouldn't be so hard on others to.

See,

Sweetie pies like because I know just women are attending this.

I'm going to say like when we're inhospitable to feminine energy,

It makes it harder.

For females to love themselves and forgive themselves for being female.

I mean,

What a joke.

We have to forgive ourselves for being female.

When you see how like crazy it is,

It makes it easier to forgive yourself.

You go like,

How deluded.

We are.

That's it.

That's it.

Okay,

That's it.

Coming in very powerfully.

That's it.

Right.

This is what's been my journey when I realized that a lot of the trouble I had with myself was just.

Reflecting this aversion to feminine energy that was running.

And it's insanity.

It's what will take us to extinction if we don't do something.

So,

Yeah,

Self forgiveness in spades.

Being a female this time.

For having struggles with it.

That's it.

No,

I go around through my life and I'm just it's my normal.

Right.

And every so often I get like.

I see kind of what I've done.

You see like.

The empirical evidence.

And just in funny,

Small ways.

So I'm wanting you guys to look for it.

Look for your own signs of progress.

Okay,

And give yourself medals a lot.

I helped my son move.

On Friday.

So I'm 69.

He's 38.

No,

37.

And he was more puffed than I was.

The loading.

I had more juice.

He was carrying heavier things,

But still.

I'm going like,

Wow.

That's pretty cool.

You know,

And I'm going,

Yeah,

Like this is what love power does.

You know,

Not quid.

Not quid.

It stays like this and gets more.

Look for any sign and you know,

During soul retrieval,

You might feel really old like.

You guys haven't seen me on days where I'm like be struggling and I would look in the mirror.

I would be as old as Methuselah.

I would look like.

88,

You know.

I go through a phase of like for weeks where I was like 88.

And then suddenly I would be younger.

Okay,

So all of you,

It's like almost the universe is asking all of you guys to.

Give up judging yourself so heavily.

Okay,

All of you.

Really.

All your souls are asking this.

Well,

Just say yes to yourself.

Yes.

Okay.

I will give up judging myself so heavily.

So be it.

May it be as easy and as supported as possible.

Now remember,

You know,

In a week or so after saying something like this,

You might feel more self judgment coming up and it's like the clearing of the pattern.

Comes up.

It's just clearing.

So,

You know,

I've talked to you about Bruno Groning.

So when he worked with people in Germany and he did this,

You know,

Healing work that he would.

Sort of mobilize a wave of healing energy that would.

Include the hundreds and even thousands of people who were assembled and he'd set in motion this big healing energy and people would.

You know,

He'd say stand up and people would just stand up.

But often they would feel just before the healing an electrical painful,

A painful exaggeration of their illness.

Something would hurt in strongly.

So that's what it's like when something's leaving.

It's like the way of the towel.

It comes up really strongly.

It's sort of like the pain gets exaggerated.

But it's leaving.

So in something like this that we're doing.

My soul energy will be helping to oversee the change in all of you understand,

So my soul energy will be walking with you,

Particularly while you let go of this self judgment.

That's how it works.

Just need to come along for the ride just need to say yes.

One of the things I learned from Ama is,

Or when I spending time with Ama was that whatever.

Like if I was faced with a difficulty.

But no matter what the difficulty was.

It was like the healing was inside the difficulty like,

You know,

You could look at it like well,

Ama would make sure that it was healed like Ama was in charge of the healing.

Or you could say,

Okay,

The solution is inside the problem.

It doesn't matter how you think of it.

But just understand that it's already solved.

Your life's are already solved in embryo.

It's already there.

It's just for you to open your heart and mind enough that you can begin to receive the answers the healing.

You know,

It is beautiful about the audio because,

You know,

At,

You know,

First Stephanie had the audio her audio button off.

And so,

You know,

It's like it is a metaphor for having trouble hearing and embracing,

And,

You know,

Stephanie is a very good student there's no,

There's no criticism.

This is just like what we're like all of us,

What I was like.

You know,

Deaf and dumb and blind to the ways of the soul just because we did not get what we needed really early,

And also the stuff coming from other lives.

And I know why I'm that this one is so good about being able to state truth in very simple form.

It's because I had such a complex labyrinth that the amount of terror.

That I had in my face,

In order for it to clear.

Now,

The great gift of that is the great simplicity of what this one is saying.

And it's got a unifying quality.

Just because this one was so split.

I look at you,

You're,

You're all my soul.

I'm just this one,

Your other ones,

And for you guys.

You think of me,

I'm part of your soul speaking to you.

I'm an aspect of you.

Nothing separate from you.

It's part of you.

If you can remember that resistance to anything makes things worse.

I remember one day I was having trouble,

Like,

Being a happy mother with my boys,

I remember like everything just seemed so hard,

And they were,

You know,

Behaving badly it just it was just agony,

Being a mother that day and my mom turned to me and she said,

Just pick up the burden.

And what she meant was stop fighting all this,

Just,

You know,

And I was just fighting it inside myself it didn't show,

But she could feel it.

Just pick up the burden,

And the day suddenly changed and became very easy.

You know,

Just flowed.

And I always remembered that,

And it's about everything.

Just pick up the burden,

Whatever it is you're facing.

Don't fight it,

Just pick it up and go,

Okay.

Okay,

Yes,

I am willing.

I'm willing to turn everything into a soul retrieval basically.

One of the things when you do that you start feeling really close to God.

You start feeling really close to any spiritual teacher,

Just feel closer.

Feel closer to Mother Nature.

The closer to goodness.

You know,

Spiritual teacher,

I mean,

Somebody who's really awake can walk through a jungle and not be harmed.

And,

You know,

Corey Tanbaum,

Who was the,

You know,

Worked with the resistance in Germany,

France,

I can't remember,

But she got released from the concentration camp through a clerical error.

Just before the women of her age group,

Which were mid 50s,

Were all put to death.

It's like the universe takes care of you.

Like,

Love is the safest thing possible.

We just feel threatened and abandoned when love is communicating something to us that we are having trouble understanding or we don't want to understand and things aren't going our way.

They don't seem to be going our way,

But actually everything is always going our way.

We're always in this ongoing education.

And you will always be getting snapshots of where you are.

That's what life is,

Sort of an ongoing snapshot of where you are.

And one of the things that's most,

You know,

If you can take little snapshots of how your fear gets in the way,

How it distorts your perceptions and how it causes you to not get your dreams.

How it just blows stuff.

You can take a snapshot of it and feel the sorrow of it.

Fear will leave and you'll be connected to love.

So I had majorly fear of change and also fear of missing something.

Like that I was going to miss out on alignment,

That I was going to miss out on stuff.

And it was pretty strong in me.

And over and over I was brought to sorrow at how,

Say,

My fear of change had gotten away or how with the fear of missing something,

How I pushed the river.

You know,

And over time of feeling the sorrow of that,

The fear got smaller and smaller.

It just hurts to do it,

You guys,

And you feel kind of lonesome when you're doing it.

But then it's over and your life gets better.

The other thing,

I want to see if anybody has any questions,

But before that I just want to say that you cannot make a mistake.

Okay.

Nothing in the big picture is a mistake.

It's all just data.

And we're either learning slowly or fast.

But it's all just giving us data.

It's not feedback.

It's not personal.

It's not like,

You know,

It is personal,

But I mean it's not like something that's like an assault or anything.

It doesn't have to be threatening.

It can just be data.

I'm feeling more and more stuck.

I'm getting more and more information about how much it hurts to be stuck.

Or I'm feeling the sorrow of having pushed the river.

Or being too intolerant.

Fear of missing something will make us intolerant of ourselves and others.

There's martyrdom,

Which will make us be slow to change,

Too slow to change.

It's kind of the belief that like sort of,

Oh,

I'll get it eventually.

But then sometimes we don't get it eventually.

You realize,

Look.

The fear is being worthless underneath.

Fear of worthlessness.

There's another fear,

Which is fear of vulnerability.

And this can get in the way of our spiritual journey because it makes us avoid vulnerability.

And in order to grow,

We have to be vulnerable.

There's the fear of lack,

And that makes us kind of greedy.

Around money or experiences or for love or whatever.

So if we can feel like how these things distort our perceptions and make us not get our dreams come true,

Feel the sorrow,

Then we can connect up with the love.

And the fear just comes from our little child self who didn't get her needs met.

Or his needs met.

Okay,

Does anybody have any questions or concerns?

Are you guys all wordless?

Can I ask a question from you?

Please.

Yeah.

It's just around the soul retrieval piece and I feel a little bit like,

Like I'm wondering,

I was thinking about something the other day,

I was talking about something the other day and then I felt this feeling in me,

In action kind of,

Of something that was like what I did as a child,

A kind of a negative feeling towards like children.

When I was a kid,

And then I felt that oddly towards an animal,

And it was like,

Oh God,

Like.

So when you were talking about solar tube last what came up for me was like feeling kind of disgusted or like horrible.

Right.

And yet knowing like,

I know why I had those feelings as a child like I know that.

But,

Yeah,

Then when it came up I was like,

Oh,

Okay.

Like,

That's so.

Is that what you mean because I'm thinking,

Should be disgusted by something that's that you just don't feel good about yourself.

Yeah,

I don't know if I'm doing this properly but yeah like it was understandable,

But I just felt disgusted with myself this morning when I thought that.

Sweetie.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I know.

It's like,

Right.

It's like it came back like out of the blue.

And I just thought,

I guess I,

In a way like if I really think about it I feel like,

Oh,

I thought I buried that you know what I mean or I thought I was,

I thought I knew what that was because it was,

You know,

Like I pegged it and said well,

That's what that was.

But then you don't realize it's still there.

It's actually still sitting there.

That's it.

You got to understand that we're all icebergs is huge amounts under now.

Yeah.

And with everything that comes up just use it like it's like that's the layer that's clearing.

So,

You see,

You can't really love yourself fully if you've got a,

If you've got like,

You know,

So this is showing like a self hatred right because,

You know,

Loving an animal and loving a child and loving yourself it's all the same thing.

Well,

It's pronounced with an animal because they're so right.

We all know it.

I don't know,

It just feels like it's very like they're innocent right there.

Yeah.

But,

You know,

So are we too.

No,

I know.

It's just,

It's more programming I feel like.

Yeah,

It's more.

Yeah,

You'd see it more in stark relief.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah,

So,

You know,

Made that clear,

You know,

As gently and as easily as possible and then you just get more open to deal with the subtleties that come up like really good you noticed it.

Yeah.

Well,

It must have wanted to clear like that's my,

Just listening to this whole talk it's like that must have just really wanted to clear because I just talked about it the other day.

Right.

Exactly.

But it was also part of Yeah,

What,

What made you even talk about it's like,

Yeah,

Moving into if you look at your life that you're moving that really you're moving into more and more levels of loving that that is your career really.

And then,

You know,

You make money on the side.

Yeah.

Yeah,

That's,

And then you can walk through incredible stuff with that kind of attitude,

More and more will come up to be cleared and you'll be going hey I'm doing it too.

Yeah.

That's it.

It's a good question.

Is that enough or do you need more?

No,

I know it just kind of know by talking about it and actually just feels like it really said it shifted and I just got really hot so I feel like burning off all this anger.

Okay,

So the anger.

Okay,

And Andrea This is really good because you see how just in the open hearted vulnerability stuff just clear open hearted open,

You know,

Honesty,

You know,

All of it,

It just clears.

I can't even see through my glasses they're so foggy right now.

That's good.

That is soul retrieval emotion and that's a good,

Good thing because often there will be you but your body might burn as a reaction afterwards.

This is part of unconscious anger burning off.

Yeah.

Yeah,

Fantastic.

It's a very deep process.

Yeah,

It's good because asking it just made it go into my head.

It just made it go into my body,

And that's what it felt like.

Yeah,

That's it and you,

You had to expose yourself you were a little more vulnerable that's fantastic.

That's it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's good.

Okay,

Anybody else,

You guys,

Please,

Please seize the moment,

Ask away.

I feel like there are a couple more questions you know that are wanting to come.

Is this something complete.

There's something wanting to come.

I have a question for Masuda.

Good.

I know that myself isn't really clear but I was thinking,

While you were talking about feelings,

Different than emotions.

Right.

Like trusting our feelings as data as truth.

Right.

And it,

It felt like a really good point like I'm glad you,

You stated the difference between those because that's something I'm often struggling with is,

You know,

Feeling emotions.

And especially when it's,

You know,

Something I'm telling myself is coming up to be cleared or,

You know,

A storyline.

That's all just not really true,

And to just witness it but not caught in the story.

But then to recognize feelings which are different than that and I know there's moments when I really do feel it and it's,

It's unquestionable that that's a true thing and it's not a storyline.

But there are a lot of other times when I'm,

I'm kind of second guessing myself like well.

What is this feeling,

Is it.

Is it instinct or is it my ego.

Which I'm sure is a big universal question.

Yeah,

Good,

Good,

Good.

Yeah.

Yeah,

It takes a certain amount of practice to be able to,

I'm just trying to feel into just I want to feel into your question a bit.

Hold on.

Okay.

All emotions are ego.

Okay,

If you get that,

That,

That helps,

You know.

And not for us to cripple ourselves with that like so that we don't respond to ourselves at all but if you just kind of know that all emotions are ego,

But feelings are are quite different,

You know,

It's like a feeling about,

Well you had one like that feeling about that,

About the children you know that play with your boys like the,

The quality of the child you get a feeling right about the child,

And about the influence on your thing just pretty much got stuff,

You know,

Like,

I had the feeling this soul retrieval.

Zoom was going to be a big thing.

You know,

And it was kind of a physical thing I registered physically.

Trying to feel how to,

How to get through to you on this.

That does make sense.

Yeah,

That sort of gut feeling versus an emotion that sort of swoops in and takes over.

Yeah.

Yeah.

The,

You know,

It will,

It will get clearer and clearer as you proceed the difference between feelings and emotions.

You know,

At the beginning,

You know,

In the early stages of the journey is harder.

Although,

You could think about your life like go back to,

You know,

When you felt something like how maybe if you look at your past history how you were steered by feelings.

You got the feeling to do something.

Yeah.

I can feel your mind like functioning like a microscope,

Putting stuff under like a microscope and it's kind of,

You know,

I know that that that we can do that we can get like to questioning and to analytical,

And we,

We get in our own way with that.

Yeah.

Okay,

I'm getting you,

You know,

When you,

When you go like is this ego,

Or a feeling.

I have the feeling that you just stand there with that but then you could ask okay universe is this really ask and expect an answer.

Is this ego or is this a feeling or you can expect that.

Yeah.

Is it,

You can expect the universe to answer.

It's like this,

This head with the microscope thing,

It's,

It's you're forgetting that the universe will answer you.

You don't have to put it under such a concentration microscope you can just make room to be answered.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah that.

Yeah.

That helps a lot.

So obvious when.

Yeah,

When we,

When we get it.

We go like what planet was I on,

Like,

Yeah.

Okay,

Good.

This is a breakthrough for you.

Yeah,

Because I do I just kind of get stuck there like okay well how do I figure it out.

How do I determine which is which and like it's all up to me and almost like I can't even like there are.

I,

I can't even.

It's not worthy of like asking for or praying for because it would be somehow not taking responsibility to solve my own problem.

If I did,

But okay,

Now this now I understand.

Yeah,

No,

It's really good.

And I'll tell you this is how we women we get crippled.

We don't.

It's like this is part of this dousing of the feminine energy the disrespect for feminine tree makes a self second guess ourselves to the point of like insanity.

Not that you're doing that but you know what I mean I'm just exaggerating for the.

Yeah,

You're.

Yeah,

We.

Yeah,

It's like yeah you have the you deserve the universal answer you.

Yeah,

Good.

And then you get more than you know noted in your journey that in your journal that the universe answered you so that you know the next time you know if you're flipping through your journal you can go Oh yeah I got answered that time.

You know I'll be shown again.

I read it a lot,

You know,

Just kind of going by the seat of my pants and then reading about how I solve something in my journal I go okay I can do that again.

Yeah,

Actually,

Alex I can feel that your head is like this is,

It's not very strong anymore.

I can feel it like you've,

You've done a lot of work like it's like you're really ready to get this that universe will respond to you,

Like it's good.

It's good.

Good work.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Yeah,

We do make progress despite ourselves,

You know,

Really,

And sometimes we don't realize how much progress we made.

Yeah,

It feels more believable in my body.

Yeah,

That's your shift.

Right,

That's what happens it feels more believable in your body that's beautiful that God exists,

And that you're loved.

That's it.

That's it.

The more it's in your body,

The more it's real.

And you can put like little notes up just to remind yourself in the short term,

Alex,

So that you're you validate it right so that you like put fertilizer on the shift and validate it.

Do you know what I mean support it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay,

I could feel like a little bit of,

I don't know about that.

But I'm just telling you what works.

I know.

That's what we're like,

You can put fertilizer and water this insight that then it will save you yours.

Yeah,

I mean that's what it comes down to is like how many years do we want to spend on the journey.

Oh God.

Good question.

Yeah,

It's good.

I feel like there's another one.

Thank you.

There's another one.

At least another one.

Okay.

I noticed with the last two questions they had a lot of body material like Andrea was talking about,

You know,

Feeling the burning in our body so that will often happen burning will come up physically as the unconscious anger brings off.

And when we clear unconscious anger,

Our lives get better.

Because most of the anger is unconscious we don't even know about it.

It just makes us feel separate from things separate from life.

And as we allow it to clear.

As we connect up,

And also what Alex said about that she noticed that it was more in our body.

That's it,

It's embodying work,

Soul retrieval,

Real soul retrieval,

You know,

Changes your vibration,

And you're,

You're more in your body.

And what you say comes more from your body comes more from your heart and body than from your head,

In a way,

Like I don't even speak from my head anymore.

I love you guys.

I'm so grateful you turned up.

I'm going to head off.

If nobody's got a question.

Stephanie will talk to you a bit more I think Stephanie.

There.

Yes,

I will.

Just a group actor Thank you so much for your wisdom always.

Yeah.

You guys you're so adorable.

Brave souls.

Love you all.

Okay.

Bye.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.