Mini-Retreat: September Reflect & Reset Ritual

Hello and welcome to Centered with Abbey.

My name is Abbey and I'm a licensed professional counselor,

A yoga instructor,

An embodied arts facilitator,

And today I have another mini retreat for you.

So this retreat is going to be what I call a reflect and reset practice.

I personally like to do this type of practice periodically,

Maybe once a month or once a season,

Whenever I think of it,

In order to take an honest assessment of how things are going in my life and to set intentions for what I'd like to change moving forward.

The goal of this practice is to help you engage in some honest non-judgmental reflection and to take some time to think about what you want the next month or so to look like.

Then we'll set some goals and intentions and send you on your way.

I know that life can be totally chaotic.

Time can feel like it's speeding by and if we're not careful it can be so easy to feel stuck on autopilot and to realize that we're not focusing our time and energy on the things that we actually care about.

We're not really prioritizing the things that are actually important to us.

We're feeling stuck.

This is so common and I've certainly been there many times.

So I think that it can be an amazing practice to set aside a little time every month or so to just take stock.

Reflect on your priorities,

Reflect on your progress,

And reflect on how you'd like to be spending your time moving forward.

I want to be clear that this exercise is not meant to be self flagellation.

This is not a time to beat yourself up for not being where you'd like to be in life.

Of course you're allowed to feel disappointed or frustrated if you do realize things aren't going the way you'd like,

But please don't be too hard on yourself if you aren't happy with your reflections.

I encourage you to approach this with compassion and curiosity.

Knowing that the only way to learn is to examine what's present with openness and honesty.

Now on to the actual practice.

I have some reflection questions for you today and the most straightforward way to use them is to view these as prompts for a journaling exercise.

I'll read you the questions and you can take some time Now I'm a fan of actually writing things down because one,

It can help you think about things in a different way.

You can get a little distance,

A little more clarity,

And two,

For this practice in particular,

It can be really helpful to have the ability to look back on your answers and kind of track them over time.

However,

If you'd rather not journal,

I do have a couple of alternatives for you.

So first,

You could use this as a purely self-reflection practice.

So rather than writing down answers,

You can just ponder these questions in your own mind.

Perhaps you could take this podcast on a walk and give yourself some time to reflect.

Or,

If you'd like to take this retreat with a friend or a loved one,

These prompts can be great discussion questions.

I can sometimes be a verbal processor,

So I know I would enjoy doing this with a friend or a loved one.

You can use this podcast as a prompt for conversation and you can answer these questions out loud with someone you love and trust.

This variant is great because now you have a built-in accountability buddy and a support system for the goals and intentions that you set today.

So take a moment now and just decide how you'd like to use this practice and take some time to set yourself up.

If you're journaling,

You can grab your journal.

Maybe take a moment to set up your space,

Make it feel cozy and comfortable.

Maybe grab a cup of tea.

I know it's starting to feel like fall a little bit here,

So warm beverages are feeling amazing to me this week.

Wherever you are and whenever you're ready,

I invite you to take a nice expansive inhale and let all of your air out with a big exhale.

Doing that a few times if that feels good and not trying to force your breath in any way.

Rather thinking about creating space,

Letting go of gripping or tensing or trying to control and just allowing your breath to do what it naturally wants to do.

Settling in.

Maybe taking a stretch or a movement of some kind.

It can feel nice to kind of sway side to side.

Our nervous system likes that.

Any kind of movement that would feel good to your body.

Maybe take a moment to notice the feeling of your feet on the ground.

Maybe notice any other areas where your body is connected to something.

The ground,

Your furniture.

Maybe pursing your lips into an O shape like you're blowing on some hot soup.

Maybe inhaling through your nose and maybe taking a nice long exhale like you're blowing out of a straw.

See how long you can make your exhale go without straining.

Maybe doing that a few times if that feels good.

Settling in.

Dropping into the present.

You can feel free to take any other movements or stretches here.

Anything that will help you come into the moment and start to feel centered.

For our first prompt I'm going to pose a few questions and just give you some time here to free write or ponder or discuss.

I'll leave some blank space in the podcast so that you can do this in real time with me.

But for the sake of length of the podcast I'll keep our writing or reflecting time to just a minute or two.

So you might well find that you'd like to pause and take more time and that is totally okay.

Here's the first prompt.

I invite you to spend a little time reflecting on the last month or so.

If you're doing this in real time it is the first week of September.

So perhaps start by answering or completing the following sentence.

For me August was.

.

.

For me August was.

.

.

Of course if you're doing this at some time in the future you can change the phrasing to match the month that you're reflecting on.

Or if you'd like to reflect on more than just August you could say for me the summer was.

.

.

For me August was.

.

.

Finish the sentence and just free write and see what comes up.

Or if you're not writing just use this as a jumping-off point for your own internal exploration.

There's no right or wrong just seeing what comes up when you reflect on the last month.

We'll get a little more specific in the upcoming prompts so just let yourself be broad and just explore.

For me August was.

.

.

If you're still going feel free to pause now and take all the time you need.

Otherwise we'll move on to the next question.

What were the top three highlights of the last month?

What were the top three highlights of the month?

These don't have to be anything huge.

They can be little moments that made you smile.

Things that make you excited or hopeful or grateful.

Or they could be big things if you want.

Top three highlights of the month.

And if you want to do more than three that's okay too.

I won't tell anyone.

But do try to come up with at least three.

If you're still going you can take some time to pause and finish up.

Or if you'd like to move on I'll read you prompt number three.

Our next prompt is.

.

.

What was hard about the last month?

What was hard?

What were some challenges,

Some frustrations or setbacks that you faced?

What didn't go your way?

What felt hard?

We'll go ahead and pause.

And just take a moment here to validate those emotions that might have come up.

Validate your frustrations or hurt feelings.

Telling yourself that it's okay to feel that way.

Offering yourself a little compassion.

It's important to acknowledge the things that maybe haven't gone so well.

It's important to name the hard things.

But we also don't want to get stuck there.

We don't want to dwell or ruminate.

So just take another moment to let yourself feel the feelings that are coming up.

And then we'll try to move on to the next prompt.

Number four.

What lessons can you draw from the last month?

What lessons can you draw?

What did you learn about yourself or the world?

What did you learn from your challenges or frustrations?

And what do you want to take with you to make the next month better?

What did you learn?

What were the lessons?

What do you want to take with you?

If you need more time you can go ahead and pause.

Or if you're ready we're going to start looking ahead to the next month.

Question five.

Is I want September to look like dot dot dot.

Finish the following sentence.

I want September to look like.

And of course again if you're not doing this in real time just say I want the next month to look like.

Or I want the next season to look like.

Let yourself brain dump,

Dream,

And explore.

And if you need more time you can pause.

Or we'll move on to question six.

What are three things that you would like to focus on this month?

What are your priorities?

And where would you like to place your time and energy?

What are three things that you would like to focus on this month?

Where do you want to place your time and energy?

Now these can be broad categories like health or friendship.

Or they can be specific like I want to get outside every day.

Or I want to join a particular group or activity.

What are three things that you would like to focus on this month?

You could simply make a list or you can take some time to write about it and explore it more deeply.

But no need to think too hard or overanalyze.

Just notice the first thing that pops into your head.

We'll go ahead and pause if you need more time.

And when you're ready,

Question seven.

We're going from broad to narrow here.

So taking into account your previous answers,

Let's try to narrow down to one overarching intention or theme that you'd like to set for the month.

This is going to be like a shorthand reminder of where you'd like to place your focus this month.

It can be a word,

A phrase,

Or a sentence.

Basically something to anchor you,

To help you remember what you'd like to prioritize this month.

And as I've been talking,

Maybe something has already immediately come to mind.

And if it has,

Go ahead and write that down.

But if it hasn't,

I have a few suggestions to help you find your intention.

So first you can read what you wrote for questions five and six,

Or reflect on your answers if you aren't writing this down.

And ask yourself,

Are there any themes?

Does anything stand out to you in your answers?

Sometimes your intention is obvious in what you've already written.

Sometimes a theme is just jumping out from the page.

Second,

You could ask yourself where you would like to grow this month.

And is there a word or a phrase or a sentence that would help you remember that growth area?

Third,

You can imagine that it's a month from now,

And you're doing a similar practice in a month's time.

And you're reflecting over this last month,

September,

If you're doing it in real time.

What would you like to have focused on as you reflect back?

What would you like the theme of your month to have been?

Working backwards can sometimes help.

Now your intention can be a word,

Like presence.

It could be a phrase,

Like progress over perfection.

It could be a sentence,

Like I will prioritize making time for my creativity.

Just take a moment and land on something.

And the good news is,

If you get halfway through the month and you don't like your intention,

You can always change it.

So this is pretty low-stakes.

If you need more time,

You can pause now.

Or if you're ready,

Let's finish up with our last prompt.

Number eight.

I invite you to take a look at your intention,

Your theme,

And reflect on some small action steps that you can take this week to make your intention a reality.

I invite you to list one to five small action steps that you can take to live out this intention.

These steps should be easily achievable.

They should be practical.

They should be small enough that they're doable even when you're tired or stressed or busy.

But at the same time,

We want them to be big enough to feel like they're actually helping you move in a direction.

So there's a balance there.

What are some small doable action steps that you can take?

If you need more time,

Go ahead and pause.

Otherwise,

Let's finish up together.

So that was your reflect and reset ritual.

I hope that it was helpful for you and I hope it helps you move through the next month with more clarity and intentionality.

So maybe just take a moment to check in with yourself.

Notice what's coming up for you now.

Notice what that experience was like.

Notice any insights or takeaways.

Anything surprising or interesting.

How is this sitting with you?

And are there any final things that you'd like to do to make this retreat feel complete?

This is your time.

So if there's anything else that you're craving,

Feel free.

Otherwise,

Let's take another nice expansive inhale and a big sigh.

Maybe stretch your arms up to the sky.

Maybe exhale to bring your hands to your heart.

Pausing.

Enjoying a moment of silence and gently releasing.

Wonderful work today.

So a couple of notes.

If you did use this as a journaling practice,

I encourage you to keep these pages somewhere handy where you might be able to review it from time to time over the course of the next month.

Maybe even set a specific time to look over your answers once per week,

Like on a Sunday evening,

And check back in with your intention.

If you didn't write things down,

Or even if you did,

I also invite you to consider writing down just your intention or maybe your action steps on a sticky note and placing that note somewhere that you will encounter it from time to time,

Like a bathroom mirror or your bedside table.

Use it as a reminder to center yourself in your intention and let that intention guide the rest of your month.

Thank you for joining and I hope you enjoyed that monthly reset ritual.