The First Noble Truth

Know it hurts.

Know that you learnt ways to not feel hurt.

However you were disciplined in denial.

Perhaps you still remember the first rush of anaesthetic.

The blessed numbing.

And yet still,

It hurts.

And there's nothing wrong with you.

Pain is at the root of human experience.

Welcome.

You belong here.

In the humility of the earth,

Not because you deserve to suffer.

But because you grew out of the same soil as all earthly beings.

Ground rich with the compost of ancestors.

Whose light drew us out of our seed.

And whose unfinished struggles injected bitterness into our leaves.

Your hurt is real.

However you came by it.

However you participated in or resisted,

Fought or allied with it.

Pain is unavoidable in this life.

Pause.

Listen to what rises through the sediment.

Layers of opposition inside yourself,

To yourself.

The voice of nothing that bad has really happened to me.

No matter how nice your life,

Or how bright the bright side.

You were watered with tears as well as rain.

Planted in the mud of karma,

As well as entrusted with the bud of liberation.

You are root and fruit.

There is no way to the sweet nectar but through the bitter rind.

So feel with blind hands and searching breath for the part of you that is shut tight.

Protected by addiction and aversion.

That sick place in your stomach.

That clenched fist in your chest.

That gripped tension in your throat.

Bow at the holy place your body has brought you to.

The seat of suffering.

And birthplace of healing.