So What Do You Really Want?

How are you,

My friends,

Welcome to this unique opportunity we give ourselves every week to stop the rush,

Hold hands and walk the path together,

Reminding ourselves what is most important for us,

Driven by the tension that hides between the question and the answer,

Our mutual longing for the truth.

So that's your opportunity to contribute,

To shine,

To share your question,

Your wonder,

Your doubt,

Your fear,

Your anxiety,

Your difficulty,

Anything you feel that might be standing between you and an awakened consciousness.

Or a wonderful insight that you had that can enrich other people.

We are here to share these.

So who wants to be the first one to jump into the waters?

What is it that you want?

Barbara is saying,

An obstacle for me is judgment.

I find myself categorizing everything,

Good,

Bad,

Ugly,

Beautiful,

Tasty and yucky.

Why is that an obstacle?

You know,

What you see is actually your intellect performing as it is designed to.

That's what our intellect is designed to do,

To judge,

To categorize,

To make sense,

So we can have a better sense of control.

That's why the intellect was invented.

So the fact that it is happening is not an obstacle,

It just means that you are functioning as the creator intended.

It becomes an obstacle when you believe those judgments to be true.

Then the whole drama begins.

You believe that these judgments determine the right from wrong.

You believe and then you're trapped.

Not because the intellect is doing its job,

But because you believe the outcome of this analysis.

You say,

It's an obstacle because I want to be right in my judgment and I create gaps.

Intellect creates gaps.

Yes,

All the time,

Intellect creates gaps.

It has an opinion.

It has endless opinions about everything.

You should,

You shouldn't,

This is good,

This is bad.

I want more of this,

I want less of that.

Right?

This is what the intellect does.

Yes,

Of course,

It's not a problem.

It becomes a problem when you believe this judgment.

You believe,

If this is a thought you meet in your mind,

Created by your intellect,

Judgment,

Opinion,

You find,

Ah,

I have this idea now,

It must be true.

Why?

Because the idea is there.

You should not speak to me like that.

Okay,

Yeah,

That's the absolute truth.

Why?

Because I've just thought about it.

You know,

That's when the invitation to grow comes,

No?

Recognizing the realm of phenomena as a mirage.

It's not real.

All our ideas and thoughts,

Opinions,

These are just phenomena that we are invited to experience because they are there.

I have that thought now in my head.

That's it.

I have that thought.

I can experience that thought.

I can meet that thought.

But I don't have to believe it.

That's the key.

I don't have to believe it.

Who?

The one who doesn't need to believe the experience as true.

You see the difference?

Stop judging yourself for judging the world.

It's also an idea.

No,

No,

I should know better.

I shouldn't judge the world.

Why not?

Who said so?

You are judging the world.

Your intellect does.

No?

Now the intellect goes and learns a new idea and start criticizing that,

Himself.

Himself.

That's a bottomless pit.

Right?

We used to blame others.

Now we blame our own intellect.

Yeah,

If you see a gap,

Close it.

That's all.

Close the gap.

And we learn how to do it.

Just do it.

Close the gap.

You don't have to believe that thought.

Just close the gap and that's it.

Remember,

The last step in closing.

Okay,

There are three steps in closing the gaps.

The first step is add humility.

You don't truly know if it's good or bad.

This is an illusion.

You don't really know.

Shouldn't you speak to me like that?

I don't know.

Okay,

Second step is adopt an opposite paradigm.

Instead of believing you should not speak to me like that,

Now I believe that's exactly how you should have spoken to me.

I choose a paradigm that is describing reality instead of opposing it.

That's how you close the gap.

Okay,

Because now there is no difference between the opinion and the reality of it.

And then remember,

Last,

The third stage is drop the paradigm.

Realize your opinions are not important.

And it doesn't matter if they promote reality or oppose reality.

Your opinions about it is not the key.

This is not where the secret is hidden.

Stop trying to tame your intellect to produce only the right judgment.

It might be,

You know,

A station on the path,

But that's not the final station.

Yeah,

We adopt an updated story about ourselves,

About reality,

A story that is more useful for us and actually promotes growth instead of prohibits growth.

But eventually you'll need to drop that story.

That's an inevitability.

Drop it.

Realize it's not important what you think.

People are so hung up with their thoughts and ideas and opinions.

Who cares?

You see what I'm saying,

Barbara?

It's not about taming your intellect.

It's about realizing.

Thoughts have no power.

The story that I tell about myself,

About the world that I meet is just a story.

It's not real.

It's a story,

A fictional story.

An awakened consciousness,

Stop telling stories.

So it is available to experience directly the truth,

To become an expression of the truth.

Barbara is saying,

Ah,

Laughing at myself.

Good.

Don't laugh,

You know,

But laugh like,

Oh my God,

This is so entertaining.

When you laugh,

That's a sign you don't take yourself too seriously,

Don't take life too seriously.

It's just a game.

It's a joke anyway.

Remember to enjoy it.

Yes,

Laugh with a full heart.

Hmm?

What do you say?

Is there anybody here for the first time?

Any brave soul who is ready to expose himself through the virtual world?

Yes,

Jessica,

Welcome.

Wow.

It's an honor to have you with us.

Imagine yourself.

Good.

Denise,

Sorry,

Sorry,

Denise.

Imagine yourself walking on the beach.

And from the sand,

You find buried in the sand,

A lamp,

An oil lamp.

You take,

You dig it out of the sand and you clean the sand off its surface and then a genie pops out of it and ask you,

What do you want?

What do you want?

What would you tell this genie?

Denise,

The first thing that comes to my mind is that I would want the genie to feed the poor in the world.

That's very altruistic of you.

And to take away people's suffering.

What about your personal suffering?

That would make me happy because I feel like there would be more peace.

You know,

We want to generate world peace.

We believe the world will be better when people would stop suffering.

That's beautiful.

Denise says,

I don't want anything for myself.

I'm one of those people that feels people's pain and energy.

Very good.

That is called compassion.

The only thing we need to make sure that we don't fall into the trap,

Believing that other people's pain should disappear.

It's not good.

It shouldn't have been there.

When will this world become better when other people will stop suffering?

Hmm.

Then we just create another trap to ourselves.

Compassion.

What is compassion?

Compassion is being sensitive enough to experience other people's pain and pleasure.

But remove the idea that that pain or pleasure is a mistake.

When you are in that gap,

Believing that other people's pain is a mistake,

And you can be at ease,

You can rest only when their pain is gone,

Then you just create another trap.

Expand your compassion.

But don't identify with the pain.

What's the difference between being compassionate and identifying with the pain?

You know,

When you identify with the pain,

You take that burden and load it on your shoulders.

You just add fuel to the fire of drama.

Just release yourself on the idea that this is a mistake.

People should not feel pain.

People should not face difficulties.

Cruelty.

No.

The first stage to close the gap is remind yourself.

You don't know.

You don't know what people should have experienced.

And what experience is good or bad.

Not for you,

Not for them.

You don't know.

Be compassionate.

But don't identify with that.

Then it's just saying,

Oh no,

We are always learning from our experiences and all on our own paths for a reason.

So the genie is still waiting to understand what is good or bad.

What exactly do you want?

The pool will be taken care of.

Don't worry.

What do you want?

Peace and love.

Is this something the genie can give you?

I hope.

Peace,

Love,

Joy.

These words describe the nature of what you are.

Unfortunately,

Not something to be gained from the outside.

Life or the genie doesn't owe us anything.

And as long as we reach out of ourselves,

Trying to fulfill some need.

I need love.

I need peace.

I need this or that.

And life is an unfulfilled promise.

Of all the things that I lack.

This is an invitation for misery.

If you ask the genie for peace and love,

The only thing he can tell you is,

Wake up.

Wake up.

What you seek,

You are.

When will you realize that?

When you stop seeking.

When you wake up,

You are that.

It's like a beggar,

Begging for a quarter,

Sitting on a mountain of gold,

Golden coins.

But unaware of the treasure that he sits on.

Because he's too focused on what other people can give him.

Wake up.

Wake up to realize that.

So you realize that.

Yes,

It is within myself.

But the genie is getting old out there.

What's going on?

What do you want?

Denise is saying,

Waking up is the work.

Good,

Good,

Good,

Good.

Waking up is the work.

The work that we are gathered here to do.

Yes?

Every day,

Every moment.

Just one thing.

As you are waking up,

Don't persuade yourself.

It is a process you need to go through.

It's a life's work.

It's a life's work.

You have so much to learn.

You have so many obstacles to overcome.

You need to mature in this way and that way.

You need to evolve.

A much better,

More evolved version of you needs to materialize.

Only then you can claim the work to be done.

That's an illusion.

If you feel there is still work to do,

Good,

Do the work.

But let go of the fact that only when the work will be done,

You can be whatever.

Completed,

Enlightened,

Or whatever idea you have in your head.

AJ is saying,

Showing up is the work.

Good,

Thank you for showing up.

Showing up to be available to experience the present moment.

That's the full sentence you meant to write there.

Showing up to be available to experience the present moment.

This is where the best version of you is waiting.

Not in the future.

Sometime later when the work is done.

No.

In the present moment.

Are you awake?

Right now.

Are you awake?

Mo is asking,

Could you tell about the emotion of being powerless?

The emotion of being powerless.

I would say it's not an emotion as much as a realization.

Powerless.

You know,

Our consciousness matures in two stages.

The first stage of matureness is realizing I am nothing.

I have nothing.

Everything I associated with I is an illusion.

I have no control.

I have no power.

I actually doesn't exist.

And everything that was associated with that I drops.

It loses its meaning.

Everything I used as a reference to identify with,

To create a personality,

An identity.

All those things fall.

Whether because I am sincere enough in my seek,

In my focused attention on a liberated consciousness,

Or because I reached to the point where I became so desperate that I had nothing to lose anymore.

So I just let go.

I let go of all the things that I was holding on to,

To create some sense of meaning,

Some sense of stability,

Of security.

All these just drops.

They lose their meaning.

I realize powerless is what I am.

It's not an emotion.

It's a realization.

Then,

When I'm completely free of attachments,

I can wake up to realize my nature.

I can wake up to realize I am everything.

Because there's nothing bounding me anymore.

No definition bounds me.

You see,

Because by definition,

Definition is something defined,

Right?

It's true up to here,

And from here it's something else.

Right?

In Hebrew,

The word definition means a fence.

It's a fence.

You can go up to the fence.

If you go beyond the fence,

It's something else.

Yeah?

So when you are not defined anymore,

There is no definition,

Then you can realize,

Oh,

I'm everything.

Wow.

I'm not defined.

I'm not bounded.

The I expands into everything,

Into the wholeness.

Then you realize,

Whoa,

Who was asking if it was powerless or powerful?

Who is that person?

Omnipresent,

Omnipotent is the nature of yourself.

Realized.

And this is saying,

I believe we have many lives,

So you get to the point you're at here,

And then you go on to the next.

In the next life,

But always evolving.

Like when I got to so scared and worried that I didn't have the energy to do it anymore,

And had to just let go of what I can control.

Sorry,

For what I cannot control.

Let go of what I cannot control.

What I cannot control,

I have to let go of.

So here you realize,

You cannot let a control of anything.

So let go of everything.

How about that?

There is nothing you can control.

It's an illusion.

Wake up to realize that.

Control is an illusion.

You influence,

Definitely.

You are influencing and being influenced.

But you are not controlling the outcome of that influence and how it manifests as reality.

Realizing that,

Let go.

Let go of everything.

Let go of your journey.

And allow it to unfold naturally.

Embrace it with a whole heart and a willing soul.

That's the true meaning of surrender.

Surrender is what?

Your ability to embrace with no agenda,

No fear.

Embrace reality.

Mo is asking,

So is it okay to be powerless?

It's not just okay.

Realizing powerless is a sign of maturity.

Stop trying to control life.

Stop trying to ride the horse.

Let the horse lead you.

The horse knows the way.

Stop trying to control where the horse goes.

You don't know.

You have many ideas,

But you don't know.

It's okay to be wrong,

To make mistakes.

Don't judge your decisions or how life unfolds in these criterias.

That's my recommendation.

There are no mistakes and life is not wrong.

Ever.

Mistake is an illusion.

Mistake is you believing you know better what should have happened.

Mistake is you believing what should have happened.

And because reality is not what you believe,

Reality doesn't align with your idea.

It's a mistake.

Do you see that?

Drop that.

Prefer reality.

Even if it contradicts your expectations.

Prefer reality again and again and again and again.

And then you realize it's not just okay,

It's perfection.

You find God.

You find divinity in the present moment.

But you need to be available to do that.

Vacant from preconceived ideas and opinions.

Do you see what I'm saying?

Denise is saying have self-compassion.

Yeah.

Compassion is like oil in the machine.

Without oil,

The machine cannot really work harmoniously,

No?

Starts squeaking and malfunctioning.

What else?

So there was Denise who came here for the first time and then there was.

.

.

Who was that before?

Jessica.

Come on,

Jessica.

Put yourself in the spotlight.

What is it that you still lack?

The Jimmy is there getting old,

Getting impatient.

He's about to go back to the lamp.

What do you want?

AJ is asking,

Please talk about individual choices along the path.

There is a whole talk.

Actually,

Yeah,

We had a talk about choices,

The illusion of choice a couple of weeks ago,

But I don't think it's ready yet for your listening.

There was an issue with the track.

So I'll try to make sure it's available as soon as possible so you can listen to the recording.

You can always find all sorts of recordings about many,

Many subjects in my Insight Timer page.

So I invite you to visit and check it out.

Practice,

Listen,

Practice,

Listen.

Guided meditations,

Talks.

Do the work.

Hmm?

So choice.

Choice is what?

Choice is an illusion that creates a drama that we are addicted to.

If we believe we need to choose between this and that,

I guarantee you are eluding yourself.

Why?

Because there is the natural flow of life.

And if you would be attuned to that flow,

The question would not have arised in the first place.

It's like a river flowing down from the mountain,

No?

If there's an obstacle,

The river doesn't stop and ask,

Should I go from the left side of this rock or from the right side of the rock?

It just flows.

It finds a way and flows without creating too much hassle about it,

Right?

If you're attuned to that natural flow of life,

You just flow.

You don't stop to ask,

Should I choose this or that,

Left or right?

You see,

The only reason we ask those questions is because we're still obsessed by profit and loss.

Where will I profit more?

Where will I lose less?

The ego is,

The ego element is dominant,

No?

So,

Wake up to realize it doesn't matter.

Jump off the rock,

Join the flow,

It doesn't matter.

You choose left or right,

Both ways you will reach the ocean.

Soon,

Way sooner than you think.

Yeah?

Consciousness of an ocean is not worried about your path,

The specific path you took to get back home.

It's a joke.

It doesn't matter.

Wake up to realize that.

Should I choose this or that?

I don't know.

This could be dangerous,

This could be easy,

This could be beneficial,

This could be harmful,

Lose,

Gain.

I'm not sure.

Let's wait.

I need to make a decision.

So,

What happens?

You are on the rock,

While life continues,

And you are glued to the rock.

Some people spend their life on the rock,

Waiting to make up their mind.

You know,

People can spend a lifetime with someone that they never really chose to be with,

Full-heartedly.

I'm not sure yet.

Can I truly commit,

Can I truly surrender to this choice?

I don't know.

Let's see.

It reminds me of a joke.

They asked a Chinese philosopher what he thinks about the French Revolution.

Was it a positive or a negative thing for the French society?

So,

The Chinese philosopher said,

It's too early to say.

My invitation to you is,

Jump off the rock.

It doesn't matter.

And if you don't know and you're still stuck,

I can give you a criteria how to choose where to jump.

Ask yourself,

What would I choose if there is no fear guiding me?

Barbara will write it down for you.

What would I choose if there is no fear guiding me,

No fear at all?

What would a fearless consciousness choose instead of me?

What would Jesus do?

No?

WWJD?

Only love.

That's it.

Where would love flow if it was in my shoes?

That's where you should go.

While you remember,

It doesn't really matter.

Just do it.

Join the flow.

Surrender to your choice and the consequences of that choice.

This is important.

That matters a lot.

Life is waiting for you.

But you need to get wet.

Yes?

Where would love flow if it were in my shoes?

But the trick is not to just peel away the first fear,

But all the fears.

Make sure you are completely fearless when you choose.

And I tell you,

Deep inside,

Every time you are on the stone trying to make up your mind,

You already know what is the right thing to do,

What is the right choice to make.

You know that deep inside,

But it's so covered with so many layers of doubts and fears about what will happen.

Then it's obscured.

But look deep,

Deep inside.

You know where to go.

You know that already.

Right?

You know that already,

Don't you?

Just be honest.

Be brave.

Courageous.

Yes.

So I would like to thank you for joining this session today and sharing your beautiful questions,

Your willingness to grow together,

Not just as individuals,

But as a united consciousness as well.

It is so powerful,

So important.

Thank you for your donations.

And let's meet again next week.

Bring a friend,

And we can make a party out of this.

And we meet again on Tuesday,

If you want to join us.

If you want to know how,

Touch base with me,

And I'll invite you.

Love you very much.

Bye-bye.