Moving From Fear To Deep Peace (With A Meditation)

So let's talk about fear.

Fear is inherently human and natural.

It's part of our experience,

But it has,

For many of us,

It's gotten away from us to the degree that it can be something that we don't want to feel.

And conversely,

It's something that we can get trapped in.

And it's this not wanting to feel it that can compound the fear and make it hard to be in our bodies or be in the moment.

We can,

In essence,

Be running from fear.

We can,

With any emotion within us,

Become really averse to it.

And fear is one of the main ones that we become averse to.

And that makes sense because it's scary and it's hard to be with fear.

But when we're averse to it,

It tends to compound and become stronger.

And we can start squirming and desperately want to cover up that fear.

And that makes perfect sense because it's hard to experience fear.

And we have a lot of ways that we cover up fear.

As we all know,

Our phones,

Shopping,

Ice cream,

Wine,

Drugs,

Sex,

You name it,

There's a billion of them.

And all of those things can very much be an escape,

A way that we distract ourselves.

And it makes sense that we want to distract ourselves,

Especially if that fear is old fear and it's fear that we haven't found a way to work with.

And so I'm hoping today some of what I share may help you work with that fear and find greater peace with it for it's being okay with and being at peace with,

And by that I mean allowing into our experience,

Not only fear,

But every emotion and every experience.

And the greater that we have the ability to do that,

The more we're going to live in a state of wholeness and a state of peace.

And we're going to live much more in the present moment for when we're resisting and covering up something like fear,

We're ultimately resisting life.

And when we resist life,

When we resist anything,

We suffer.

The Buddha said,

All unhappiness arises from a non-acceptance of what is.

And if you find a $20 bill on the sidewalk,

For example,

There's probably not a lot of resistance to that.

Or if someone says,

Hey,

I want to take you out to lunch,

Or if you win the lottery or,

You know,

All these things that we want.

I'm saying this because it's this disparity between wanting experiences and not wanting them that leaves us hung up,

That leaves us in a state of craving and aversion.

And it's in extricating ourselves from that state of craving and aversion that we can find true peace.

And it's in the act of embracing whatever's arising,

Whether it's something we want or don't want,

By taking little baby steps towards doing that,

By allowing life to arise within us with all these uncomfortable emotions or in this external world that we reside as well.

The greater our acceptance,

The greater our inner peace.

So,

Specifically talking about fear,

It's a big one because it doesn't feel good and it creates a lot of experience in our body that can be overwhelming.

And the first thing we have to do is slow down because,

As you know,

When we experience fear,

Things can get really sped up.

We can get into our heads and we can start thinking and start squirming and unconsciously covering up that fear with things that may not ultimately be serving us.

They may serve the purpose of covering up the fear,

Like if we run to the fridge and grab that pint of ice cream or whatever it is,

It works,

But it's only a temporary fix because the fear doesn't go away and the pleasure of the ice cream,

For example,

Doesn't last.

And then we can feel guilty on top of it and sugar crashed as well if we eat too much.

So the main thing to begin with when we feel fear is to slow down.

And realize that we are in control,

Even though the fear can be so big and we feel it and then we're gone,

We're not present,

We shut down,

We cover up or we speed up or we distract ourselves.

And so the first thing is to slow down and it takes great courage to acknowledge that there's fear in us,

Even though we know it,

Even though we feel it and for many of us,

It can be a very frequent visitor and that's okay.

And it's important as we slow down to recognize how we greet that visitor.

Do we push that visitor away?

Do we never open the door to fear?

Even though it's knocking and it seems like it's knocking so loud sometimes that it's all we feel and it's in the act of slowing down that we can find power.

We can reclaim a sense of power in the face of fear and other challenging emotions.

And the reason is because when we slow down,

We are consciously choosing to do something perhaps different than we have in the past in the face of fear and anxiety.

So when we slow down,

We're taking a conscious choice in the face of these old patterns that often make us tighten our body,

Make us go into thought and make us run to the fridge or the phone or the liquor cabinet or,

You know,

Humans.

We have lots of ways to make ourselves feel good.

And it isn't about feeling bad,

But it's about saying,

Okay,

I need to get a handle on this because I want to feel good authentically.

I don't want to just feel good temporarily.

And so when we slow down and we say,

I'm feeling fear,

When we simply just say,

I'm feeling fear and we notice how the mind wants to stir up,

How the body wants to tighten,

How these old patterns,

It can be something as simple as just whenever we feel fear,

Busying ourselves,

Cleaning the house.

And that's fine.

You know,

Not all of these ways we cover up fear are inherently bad or destructive in whatever way.

But on the spiritual path,

We have to see fear as an opportunity and we have to see it as an opportunity to reclaim our wholeness.

And it's in reclaiming our wholeness that we can find true peace.

And we can't find it when we're running from ourselves,

When we're running from life,

From the reality of whatever's arising in any moment.

And so when we slow down,

When we say,

OK,

I'm just going to relax here a little bit in the face of this storm,

We make a very profound and courageous choice to not be having that fear control us.

We can start to reclaim,

Get our hands back on the wheel because we know when it's when we're in a state of fear,

We can be lost.

And it's like we don't have any grounding.

We don't have any power.

And so by slowing down,

When we notice fear,

It's the first step we can take to reclaim our power and not be chased around by the fear.

And once we've slowed down,

Then we come into the body and the breath.

We anchor ourselves.

We really,

Really,

Really gently come into the body as best we can,

For it's in the body that we can heal.

We want to get out of our thoughts and come into our body as best we can.

And that can be scary if we've been living in fear for a long time.

And all it sometimes takes is feeling our feet on the ground and just moving them.

And that can remind us that we have a choice,

That we can bring our awareness where we want it to be.

And it's in bringing our awareness where we want to be that we start to walk down a new path of reclaiming our power from being lost in fear,

Anxiety,

Desire,

All of these emotions.

And by coming into our bodies and just feeling what's there,

We're not seeking the fear per se.

We're not seeking pleasure per se.

We're just gently feeling the feet,

The legs,

The midsection,

The torso,

The head.

We're grounding ourselves here and we have to ground ourselves.

As human beings,

If we're not grounded in the body or at the breath,

If it's hard to be in the body,

We can just choose to come back and stay at the breath.

Or what we're seeing or feeling or hearing.

By doing that,

We start to reclaim our power.

We start to choose to be where we want to be.

And by be,

I mean our awareness.

It's so easy to be lost in fear or lost in these old patterns of stuffing emotions,

Of running from ourselves,

Of running from life.

And the reality that fear is part of life.

There's a lot of stuff that arises within us and outside of us that we don't want.

And that's a big reason why when we slow down,

Come into our bodies or stay at our breath,

Stay anchored here,

We start to let what we don't want be there and start to maneuver around it because it's so easy again to get locked in resistance to fear.

And it's so easy to get lost in these old patterns,

These ways that we have for years perhaps met fear that aren't serving us,

That aren't freeing us.

And it's in slowing down,

Coming back to our body and our breath that we can start to make a choice to extricate ourselves from these old patterns.

And then once we've done that,

We can start facing our fear.

We can start meeting it.

And we do that with mindfulness and with loving kindness.

When fear arises and we notice it,

And that's why slowing down,

It helps us step away from the fear.

It helps us step away from the busy mind and it helps us remember that we have a choice.

And when we slow down and when we come into our bodies,

We slowly start to create distance between this fear and our awareness.

We start to observe it.

And the more that we do that,

The more we can start to create a healthy distance where we see that fear is something that perhaps up till now has been all consuming,

But we can start to notice by slowing down and staying grounded within ourselves that fear isn't constant.

It may seem it,

But there's varying degrees of fear.

And then we can start to perhaps realize that if this fear isn't constant or if it ebbs and flows,

That means that it's not permanent.

It's not permanent.

It may seem like it,

Especially when it's so scary and overwhelming,

But the more we're able to step back and observe the fear very,

Very courageously and lightly,

Gently,

Noting,

Okay,

There's fear,

There's fear,

And noting the quality of it.

What does it feel like in the body?

How does it affect our breath?

This is why we come down away from the mind into the body and at the breath.

And it's in this process of slowing down that we can really start to learn to pay attention to how fear affects us.

How does it affect my breath?

I know for me,

I hold my breath if I'm feeling fearful.

And I know my body gets tight.

And it's in slowing down,

Coming into the body and at the breath,

I can start to recognize how fear affects my body and my breath.

And there are very wonderful barometers that we can use to not only regulate how something like fear affects us,

But we can start to anchor ourselves there and start to perch and look at fear when it arises.

And as we do so,

Again,

We start to create a bit of a distance and objectivity where we see that fear isn't permanent,

It ebbs and flows.

It can be super intense a lot of the time,

But there's other times that it's not.

And when we start to see that ebb and flow,

Even just for a moment,

Part of us can start to recognize the fact that this fear isn't constant.

Just like pleasure isn't constant.

Nothing that arises within us or outside of us is constant.

This is one of the truths of Buddhism.

Everything is impermanent.

And everything is not self.

It's not ultimately who we are.

And the more we can slow down and stay in our bodies and at our breath and observe whatever's arising,

But in this case,

We're talking about fear,

And feel how it feels in the body.

Where do I feel it?

Notice how the mind wants to squirm around and cover it up and hop on our phones or whatever it is and just stay gently.

We can start to find a degree of empowerment in the face of fear,

Where we can note the objectivity of it,

Where we can note the impermanence of it,

And we can really note these old patterns,

These unconscious patterns of how we meet it.

And on this spiritual path,

It's so important to meet what is arising with a degree of acceptance.

It's really hard with something like fear to do that,

Especially if we've been resisting it for so long.

But the more that we can meet it with acceptance,

And we do that simply by observing,

How is it affecting my breath,

My body,

Acknowledging the reality of fear,

We can start to begin acknowledging the reality of life.

And the more we practice just slowing down and staying in our bodies and breath and noticing the fear,

Then we can bring in another element that's a real game changer,

And that's loving kindness.

This Buddhist practice that the Buddha said is half of Buddhism.

This practice of loving kindness is,

I can't understate the importance of it,

And it goes like this,

When fear arises,

Rather than stuffing it away with cookies or wine or whatever we want to do,

We stay grounded,

Softly,

Slowly,

And then we start to meet it with compassion and love.

This is a really,

Really critical element in this path towards healing our old relationship with fear,

And from getting out under its foot.

Instead of cowing to fear and covering it up,

Running from it and ourselves and life as it presents itself in our emotions,

We can start acknowledging our emotions,

And we can start meeting them,

Not just with sitting here watching them take us over,

Even as they ebb and flow,

We can rise up within us.

We can instigate an inner revolution of love,

Of self-love,

Of acceptance,

And kindness with whatever emotion arises,

And in the case of fear and anxiety,

They can be flat out overwhelming.

They can make it so that we are pinned to the wall in the face of them,

Where we can feel helpless.

I know this so well,

And this process of slowing down,

Coming to the body,

The breath,

Our anchors,

What we're seeing and feeling,

Helps us reclaim this power,

And this power that we can lose so easily in these strong emotions,

These old habitual patterns of fear and anxiety.

And it's this act of slowing down,

Doing our best to stay in our bodies,

Noting the sensations,

Noting our breath,

And noting as fear arises,

That fear is arising,

Turning towards it instead of running from it,

Because every time we run to the fridge,

Every time we buy that new pair of shoes,

Or tidy the house because we're distracted,

We're not staying open to life,

We're resisting life,

And the more we do that,

The further away we get from the present moment,

And the more that we can acknowledge fear and slow down,

Or any emotion,

And meet it with a courageous sense of compassion.

For when we're experiencing fear,

We're suffering,

Right?

And when we're suffering,

You know,

We have two choices.

We can either ignore the suffering and cover it up,

And engage in whatever modality that we choose to feel good,

Or we can start holding our ground,

And we can rise up within and be bigger than that fear,

And we can meet it with a profound degree of gentleness and kindness and love.

It's this act of choosing love in the face of fear,

That we can start to realize the profound capacity that we have to not only stay present with fear,

But we can recognize that we're bigger than fear,

And we can start to infuse our being with this sense of courageous love,

Of compassion.

And when fear arises,

We can recognize that we're suffering,

And when we're suffering,

We have a choice.

We can either distract ourselves so we don't feel the suffering,

Or we can meet it.

We can meet our fear,

And we have to,

Because it's not going anywhere,

It'll just keep coming back until we welcome it home,

Until we accept it.

And that's a hard task,

I understand that so well,

Because it's so easy to be overwhelmed by fear and anxiety.

I know this so well,

And that's why turning towards fear,

Slowing down,

Staying grounded,

Turning towards it,

Acknowledging the reality of it,

Even though we don't like it,

Softening,

And holding that fear with kindness,

Like we would hold a wounded child.

If our child was running down the road and skinned their knee,

We wouldn't just say,

Oh,

You're in pain?

Here,

Go on your phone.

Here,

Eat a pint of ice cream.

We would hold that child,

We would comfort them in pain.

We would hold them in their pain,

We can't take away their pain,

But we can be with them.

We can help them hold their pain,

And we can help ourselves hold our pain,

Our fear,

By holding it and ourselves,

Like we would a child.

And this is a choice that we have,

And this is a choice that can accelerate our spiritual growth,

Because by choosing to slow down,

Stay grounded,

And meet what's arising with a courageous acknowledgement of the fact that there's stuff going on in me that I don't like,

Lots of it,

Often,

Not just fear,

Jealousy,

Anger,

All these things,

We have a choice to turn towards them and meet them with gentleness and compassion.

For when,

Again,

We're experiencing fear or anxiety,

Or any challenging emotion,

We're suffering,

We're in pain,

And it's in this act of recognizing that we're suffering and choosing to turn towards that pain with gentleness and softness and love,

That that pain starts to slow down,

Because when we resist it,

When we run to the fridge or the phone or busyness,

When we're feeling these challenging emotions,

It just keeps them away,

And they just knock louder on that door,

These emotions just want to be integrated within us,

And it's hard to just say,

Okay,

I'm going to be okay with fear.

That's why loving-kindness is a superpower,

It gives us,

It gives me something to do,

It helps me not just sit with the fear,

But meet it with courage and compassion.

And as I do that,

I start to feel good,

Because I'm nurturing myself,

And the fear starts to slowly abate.

And the bonus,

The big bonus,

Is I get out of the small,

Tight experience of being lost in fear,

These old patterns,

And it's this practice of meeting this fear with love and compassion,

I start to become love and compassion.

They start to be my response to not only fear and anxiety,

But everything in life.

This is something that we can do in every moment,

Because these emotions,

They arise,

And we have a choice,

And that choice is turning to them with gentleness and compassion,

Turning to ourselves and the pain that we're in.

And if we all did this,

This whole world that we've created of products and consuming and achieving and striving and selfishness and all this stuff would come down,

Because when we're grasping and running and distracting ourselves,

We're just running from ourselves,

You know.

And I say this because when we are in a state of peace,

We don't need from the world in the same way,

As you know.

You know,

If we've meditated at home for half an hour,

Or done yoga,

That urge to go down and grab an ice cream or stay busy,

We can notice,

Even in that half an hour,

That everything slows down,

And we're more okay.

And it isn't because our outer situation has changed,

Really,

In that half hour,

Most likely.

It's because we've come into our bodies through yoga or meditation,

We've started to settle in to ourselves,

And it's this act of meeting what's arising with compassion.

For again,

When we're experiencing fear,

It's no fun,

We're suffering.

And it takes great courage and wisdom and insight to recognize that and to say,

You know what,

I'm not going to push those feelings away,

I'm going to embrace them,

Little bite-sized bits at a time,

We don't need to do the whole ball of fear at one time,

And I don't think it's possible,

Nor advisable,

Because these are old conditioned patterns that we have of resisting inherently natural emotions.

And on this spiritual path,

It's a profound act to acknowledge whatever's arising,

And it's this practice of loving-kindness that not only,

Again,

Helps us meet whatever's arising,

But it helps it integrate,

And it helps us drop our resistance to life.

For these emotions are life,

We don't like them.

I don't like fear,

I don't like jealousy,

I don't like all these things.

You know,

They're not as comfortable as feeling good.

But it's not about feeling good either,

Good in terms of getting what we want or feeling pleasure.

This spiritual path is about wholeness,

And it's about growing in peace.

And the more we can accept these different emotions,

The more we can grow in wholeness,

And the more we can grow in peace.

And the more we do that,

The more we're going to be living in the moment,

And we're going to be experiencing a depth of peace and ease and love within us that feels way better than any pleasure,

And it feels way better than any fear.

And so it's coming on to this middle path,

This path of acceptance,

Of compassion and gentleness,

And acknowledgement of reality as it's arising,

That we can start to find a way out of it.

So we grow in wisdom by being,

By slowing down,

By recognizing how we interact with these emotions,

And then we build this practice of loving-kindness by being aware of the meeting ourselves,

Meeting whatever's arising with compassion and love,

And together they can help us awaken to a greater and deeper reality,

To true peace that can only be found by running to ourselves instead of the fridge,

Or away from these challenging emotions that we maybe have done for a long time.

Loving-kindness can give us,

It's a beautiful tool,

And when we practice it,

As we'll do at the end here,

We're not focusing on accepting the emotions as much as we are imbuing our being with compassion and love,

So that our focus,

While these emotions are arising and through mindfulness we're aware of them,

It's through loving-kindness that we can direct our energy,

And it's in directing our energy in that way,

And meeting whatever arises with an open heart,

With gentleness and courage and compassion,

That we can start to find acceptance.

And we don't even have to directly do that per se,

It's focusing more on the compassion.

And then the acceptance,

It's hard to accept when we're scared,

When we don't know what else to do,

And when we're grounded in loving-kindness and in ourselves,

That the body and breath then we can start to accept,

Because then we can realize we're bigger than these emotions and we can meet them with our true nature,

Which is love and compassion and kindness.

We're here talking about finding liberation from suffering,

From being in our heads.

We're talking about finding a way to live in a state of peace and presence,

And it's these two wings of awakening,

Wisdom,

Born of mindfulness,

And love,

Born of loving-kindness,

That can help us do that.

They can help us find a reality that we perhaps don't even know exists within us,

Because it's been so covered up by fear for so long,

And this practice of mindfulness and loving-kindness,

They can help us embrace these emotions that we've been running from and lost in and smothered by for so long,

And they can lead us to peace and presence.

This path of awakening is one that includes fear.

It has to,

Because fear is part of reality,

Yet no one taught me,

No one taught us this is what you do when you're experiencing fear,

And 57 years in,

There's old patterning,

Old ways of being that,

You know,

From childhood,

Just tightening,

Resisting,

Covering up.

It's what we do as humans,

But there's another thing that we can do as humans,

There's another way to be human,

And it's much better,

Because we know being lost in fear sucks,

And running from it doesn't work,

Covering up doesn't work,

So what does work,

Slowing down,

Acknowledging the reality of it,

And even when it's overwhelming,

Doing our best to come into the body,

Stay at the breath,

And meet it with compassion,

And again,

By focusing on the practice of loving-kindness.

Not so much the emotions,

They come and go,

It's building this capacity to be with what's arising that can free us,

To acknowledge it,

And be with it with gentleness,

We can open our hearts and our minds through this practice of loving-kindness and mindfulness.

We can start to find our way out of these old,

Deep,

Often overwhelming experiences of fear and anxiety,

And we can start to,

By this practice of loving-kindness,

Come back again and again and again to abiding in a state of compassion and love.

And we can,

And this is something that we have a choice,

But we have to want to find a different way.

Just keep in mind,

When you're experiencing fear,

When I'm experiencing fear,

Or any other challenging emotion,

We're suffering.

Really try to keep that in mind,

Because it's so tempting,

When we are suffering,

When Jeff is suffering,

I want to cover it up,

And I see these old ways,

You know,

It's what we do,

There's a different way.

And when Jeff is suffering,

When Jeff,

This being,

Is experiencing pain,

Just imagine,

Imagine it's a child,

Imagine yourself as a child.

This is very healing work,

In my experience,

This is self-love.

And we can start to,

Instead of resisting these parts of our experience,

Hating them,

We can start to accept them,

And we can start to love ourselves.

And then we go down a path of love and compassion,

That whatever we experience,

Instead of getting frustrated or covering it up,

We turn towards our experience,

Ourselves,

And we meet it with gentleness and love,

And then we grow,

That becomes our way of being,

In my experience.

And then these old ways of tightening and distracting ourselves and running and covering up,

Running from ourselves is replaced by running to ourselves,

With love,

With gentleness,

With compassion.

And that's why loving-kindness is so big,

For we start to be gentle with ourselves,

And then all of these emotions,

They start to be welcomed into our experience.

And our heart opens,

And our capacity to love and to be with what's arising deepens,

And that becomes our new way of being.

And then no matter whatever arises,

We can turn again and again to this practice of meeting it with gentleness and ease.

And there's great power and strength and effectiveness as we do that,

For when we're lost in fear,

We're scrambling,

We're like a chicken running around with our heads cut off.

Our decision-making capacity is diminished,

Our creativity is diminished,

Our capacity to not only welcome these emotions,

But any situation is diminished.

And it's by grounding and rooting ourselves in compassion and love and ease,

Kindness,

That we can start to extricate ourselves from these old patterns,

And we can grow in peace and presence and ease,

And that can be our new way of being,

In my experience.

With fear,

The greater that capacity that we have to be compassionate and present,

Then we can slowly start to be with it,

Meet it,

Accept it,

And let it go,

And realize that all these thoughts,

And this is important,

All these thoughts and all these emotional patterns they want to draw us in,

They're temporary.

This is what Buddhism teaches us.

And the pull is so strong,

Because their ego,

Right?

The ego doesn't care,

It wants us to suffer,

And we can let it go.

The more we're grounded in this state of loving,

Kind presence,

Of awareness,

The more we start to see the impermanent nature of everything,

And the more we can start to say,

You know what?

I'm not going to buy what you're selling.

You know,

If you're practicing meditation,

You can see the mind,

How it works.

It's so alluring.

And the more we're in this state of loving kindness and presence,

We see the falsity of that,

And we can let go of these fears.

We can ultimately let them go,

Because they're not who we are.

Ultimately,

We are awareness.

And it's by meeting these fears with mindfulness and being gentle and compassionate with them and creating this state of ease within us through this practice of loving kindness,

We can get better at being with it.

It is a process.

It takes time.

It's a practice.

But the more that we can,

Then we can start to dwell in a state of presence,

Of ease,

Of gentleness,

Of kindness,

Of love,

Of happiness.

These states that we perhaps have forgotten that have been covered over,

At least in my experience,

With the old conditioning and fear patterns and other patterns of desire,

All this stuff.

And the more we can dwell in this state of awareness,

Of loving kindness,

Then we can start to see that these experiences,

These thoughts and emotions,

They're not who we are.

Ultimately,

Who we are is,

We're awareness,

We're presence,

We are compassion.

These inherent states that we're not creating them,

We're opening to them.

This is who we are when we're present.

We're not encumbered by wrestling with and resisting fear.

This is our natural state.

Loving kindness can help us return to our true nature.

It can help us learn to abide in a state of ease and peace and gentleness and compassion,

Where there's great strength and great creativity and great peace.

But it's a practice.

And it's through this practice of loving kindness that we can start to abide and rest gently in the present moment,

In a state of love and peace.

But to stay in the moment,

We have to find a way to meet that fear.

And it's through the practice of simply being gentle with ourselves and meeting that fear as if it was a part of us,

A part of our reality,

Which it is that we have resisted for so long.

And it's in meeting that fear,

That visitor,

As Rumi said in his poem,

The Guesthouse,

With compassion and acceptance and gentleness,

That things can really start to change because then we're not resisting the reality of life.

We're not resisting these emotions.

And the more we're able to meet them from a place of loving kindness and gentleness and ease,

The more we become gentle and compassionate and easeful.

And we remember what it's like to not be stressed out all the time.

And then when we meet these emotions from that place of gentleness and compassion and ease,

Peace,

We begin to welcome them home and they start to integrate.

For when we resist,

They just persist.

So,

Let's practice a bit.

Let's practice a bit.

And the more we practice,

The more we'll start to wake up to these truths that Buddhism affords us.

And this insight and clarity can grow as can our capacity to meet whatever's arising.

And again,

There's much power in peace.

When we're fearful and trying to control the world,

It maybe feels good,

But there's not a lot of power there.

It's being grounded in the moment,

Within ourselves,

And meeting whatever arises within us and without,

With acceptance and with presence,

With loving kindness and ease and compassion that we can find a real sense of power.

This isn't just like,

You know,

All light woo-woo stuff.

This is courageous work.

This is the most,

Perhaps,

Challenging and important thing that anyone might ever attempt.

For this fear,

It's controlling us.

And we can flip the table and we can start to take control of our lives again.

And not only that,

We can create a life that's much deeper in meaning and experience,

In peace and in power and presence than we may have ever thought possible.

And fear is a part of that because,

Again,

When we're running from it and we're caught up in these old patterns of resisting it and covering it up,

We can't know peace.

And we want to know peace.

We can.

We can.

And we deserve it.

We deserve it.

We deserve it.

We deserve it.

We deserve it.

And we can find it.

We can create it within ourselves.

So let's practice doing that now.

So we'll work for about 15 minutes or so.

So just take a moment and get comfortable.

Whether you're sitting or lying down,

It doesn't matter.

So wherever you are,

I invite you to gently close your eyes if that feels right.

Or you can just soften your gaze.

And I invite you to let go of thinking,

Let go of your day.

And I invite you to choose this time as we practice now as a gift to yourself,

As perhaps moving in a new direction of finding a way to be with parts of your experience that might be challenging historically.

So with your eyes closed or your gaze just softened,

Bring your awareness to your feet and maybe just move your feet just gently and feel them.

So when I say keep our awareness in the body,

It's a really felt sense,

A somatic sense.

And that's why this practice is so powerful.

Because when we're in the body,

Tremendous healing can happen on a deep level.

So just gently move your feet and just feel how that feels and maybe direct an inward smile at your feet.

We can bring some levity,

Some lightness here as well.

Even though this is courageous and profoundly important work,

We can bring a sense of gentleness and playfulness to it as well.

And now maybe just move your legs just a little bit and then let them sit and just see what sensations are there.

We're not exploring deeply here.

We're just really coming into the body,

Just really grounding ourselves here.

And slowly bringing your awareness to the buttocks,

The midsection,

The groin,

And the stomach and the chest area.

And if at any time it gets scary or uncomfortable,

It's okay.

You can just open your eyes and take a look around the room or move your body a little bit.

You know,

You're in control here,

Whatever works for you.

We're just slowly,

Slowly trying to get used to being in the body.

Feeling the lower back here,

Feeling the upper back.

Just coming home to ourselves,

Coming home.

Feeling the arms,

The hands and the arms and the shoulders and the back of the neck and the sides of the neck and the front of the neck,

The throat.

Just spending a moment here.

And now the back of the head,

Excuse me,

The sides of the head and the face.

Just checking in here,

Just noting what's alive for you in this moment,

In this part of your body,

What's going on.

And then slowly just sweeping gently all the way from the top of the head down through the shoulders and the chest,

The back,

The arms,

Stomach,

Low back,

Midsection,

Legs,

Feet,

And just feeling the whole body perhaps in this moment.

Just feeling it gently.

Now checking in with the breath,

Just allowing it to be as well,

Just noting it,

Seeing if you can stay grounded in the body,

Feeling the body while you observe,

While you feel the breath at the chest perhaps.

Feeling how the chest opens and relaxes.

Noting how the breath affects the body,

Noting how it can work in conjunction with an opening and a softening.

And thoughts may arise,

It's what they do.

And as humans,

It's part of our experience.

You can just smile at them and just let them go.

Even if they're screaming at you about something that you have to do or that you didn't do,

Just give yourself this time,

A little vacation from the thoughts.

And we do that by staying in the body and noting the thoughts and they'll come back again.

We don't need to pay too much attention to them.

They say 90% of our thoughts are repetitive.

And even when we go and think them,

They don't go away,

They often just get worse.

So see if we can give ourselves this gift of staying grounded in the body or the breath or both.

Sometimes it's possible to just feel the whole body and breath as one,

Just opening,

Expanding and softening,

Closing,

Opening and closing.

And we can slowly become used to staying in this gentle place within us.

This place of allowing whatever's going on to be and just staying very,

Very softly and gently grounded in the body and the breath.

And again,

If it gets too scary or uncomfortable,

You can open your eyes,

You can turn your head,

Do what you have to do to feel comfortable.

That's the most important thing.

And now let's infuse our being with this practice of loving kindness.

So no matter what you're experiencing,

Whether it's challenging thoughts or sensations,

Emotions that are arising,

What I'd like you to do is just maybe give them a little nod and say,

Hey,

I see you and it's okay that you're here,

It's okay,

I see you.

And what I want you to do is rather than letting those thoughts or emotions sweep you away into tightness or story,

And if they do,

It's okay,

We'll just come back,

But do your best to just,

As we move into this loving kindness portion of the meditation,

Really focus on what it feels like as we say these phrases,

These loving kindness phrases.

It's very important to feel what it feels like as we say these phrases,

Because we may have forgotten what it's like to be at ease and peace in this constant fear that many of us have experienced.

So as you're ready,

I'm going to say these five phrases,

May I be happy,

May I be healthy,

May I be safe,

May I live with ease,

And may I be peaceful.

And as best you can,

As I say them,

I want you to,

If it feels right,

You can repeat them silently to yourself,

But I want you to really try to feel what it feels like to be peaceful,

For example,

Or at ease.

And it's in this act of really feeling in our bodies these states that we can start to normalize these experiences,

These states of being at ease,

Of being peaceful,

Of being safe,

Healthy,

And happy,

These experiences that perhaps aren't familiar to us in all of our busyness and our resistance.

So as we say these phrases,

Which we'll do now,

Really do your best to feel what it feels like and want it as well,

Because again,

Fear can be so addictive,

And tightness,

Smallness.

We deserve to be at ease and peaceful and big,

But we have to want it.

We have to want to feel these things.

And so,

Because they may be new,

Maybe give a little bit of extra effort.

I find that's really helpful,

Like really want to feel peaceful.

Feel what that feels like in your body and send it,

Let it radiate through your body in a very somatic way.

Don't just say it in the head,

Feel it.

And it's in this way that we can build familiarity with these experiences and states of ease and peace,

Gentleness.

And they can become familiar to us to the degree that,

Especially as we notice the impermanent nature of fear and other emotions,

We can start to stay in this inner world that we create through love and kindness.

It can become our new reality,

But we have to want it.

And the best way to want it is to experience it,

And then we'll want it more.

So as you're ready,

I'm going to repeat,

I'll say these and you can repeat them.

And again,

Really feel it like willfully want it more than the fear in a very gentle way.

So you can repeat after me.

And we'll say these phrases a handful of times to let them really sink in.

And again,

If thoughts arise,

Just come back to the body and feel.

So repeat after me,

May I be happy and really feel the lightness of happiness.

May I be healthy.

May I be safe.

Really want it.

May I live with ease,

May I live with ease.

May I be peaceful.

And again,

May I be happy.

May I be healthy.

May I be safe.

May I live with ease.

May I be peaceful.

As best you can let go into those feeling states.

Again,

May I be happy.

May I be healthy.

Really want it.

May I be safe.

May I live with ease.

May I be peaceful.

And we'll do it two more times,

Softening the body as best you can.

May I be happy.

May I be healthy.

May I be safe.

May I live with ease.

May I be peaceful.

Really feel it,

Feel it,

Want it.

One last time.

May I be happy.

May I be healthy.

May I be safe.

May I live with ease.

May I be peaceful.

And it's in this way that we can familiarize ourselves with these inherently natural but often forgotten somatic states of being that are our true nature,

These states of ease and peace,

Of health and happiness,

Safety.

And it's in practicing in this way we can remember,

We can remember what it's like to feel peaceful,

We can become peaceful,

And it can become our new reality,

A reality that can afford us the perspective to meet whatever's arising with compassion,

And it can afford us the degree of awareness and presence and groundedness within ourselves that we can let go of fear when it arises.

We can integrate it,

And eventually we can let it go.

And we can choose again and again,

Over and over and over,

To be peaceful and at ease.

And that can become our new way of being,

Our new way of living.

And as it does,

We'll start to rest and be more present.

We'll start to rest in the present moment,

In a state of ease and peace and gentleness,

Compassion,

Safety and health.

But we have to want to,

And the old ways,

As we know,

The mind can be so strong.

But it's in this way that we can find a new path,

And we can learn to rest.

We can learn to rest in every moment,

And we can create this home within us that we can return to again and again,

That we can rest in.

And this peace is natural.

This peace is our natural state.

It's just one that we've forgotten,

Perhaps,

But we can reclaim it.

We can build it.

We can return to it time and again.

We just have to want to,

And the more we do,

The more we'll want to,

Because it feels so much better.

And we deserve it.

You deserve it.

We all do.

We deserve peace.

We can let go of our ways of being tight and small and resistant,

And we can do that over time by practicing being mindful and being kind and gentle to ourselves.

And no one can do this except we can.

Only we can do this.

Only we can give ourselves this compassion and love and gentleness and reclaim these felt sense states of ease and peace and lightness.

And it's worth it.

And we can find it.

We just have to just practice gently.

It just takes time.

It's a much better option than being caught in the old relentless waves of suffering and all the old fears.

And it's this practice like we did,

And that meditation will lead us.

It will lead us to greater wisdom and insight and clarity and peace.

It can help us awaken to our true nature and to the wonder that's in every moment.

And we can learn to rest.

We can learn to rest.

And that's perhaps one of the most beautiful things that we can experience,

To rest gently,

Alertly in every moment.

And we deserve it.

You deserve it.

You can find it.

You can.