Topics-Staying Focused, Etc. (Live Q & A From 1/28/21)

Thank you very much.

Hola.

Where are my people at?

My Thursday night group.

Oh,

Now you're starting to come in.

My Thursday evening crew,

How are you?

Welcome to the show.

Ask me a question.

See my ticker?

Welcome.

If you have a question I can help with,

Put it in the comments and I will answer it live.

My ticker comments.

So everybody,

Welcome,

Welcome.

Today I was going to start off and please say hi,

Throw in your comments.

I'm going to start with something about staying focused.

Tools and strategies to stay clear and focused.

So,

Yeah,

To stay focused.

We live in a fast paced world out there,

People,

And things are spinning fast.

I read Autobiography of a Yogi a little while ago and he was talking about how he came over to the United States in 1920.

And he was remarking how it was difficult to get people in the United States to slow down enough to hear spiritual teachings.

Like to,

You know,

To really teach spirituality to them.

It was difficult to get them to slow down enough.

Because they're just moving so fast and just so fast paced life.

And that was in 1920.

You know,

That was 100 years ago.

Just think how much faster we're going now.

So there is a very fast pace to life.

And hello Sarah,

Thank you for joining.

I love the people that are here every week.

It just gives me the warm and fuzzies.

I love it.

So,

Yeah,

We're moving in such a fast paced world and it's so largely unconscious.

And I'm talking about those,

Including those of us that have woken up spiritually to some level.

We are unconscious still many times in our lives going,

Doing things and stuff.

We fall into unconsciousness,

You know,

Pretty regularly.

It happens.

So there's so much unconsciousness in the world.

There is so much pull to live the way that we've all been taught to live.

We've been domesticated to.

We've been society's teachings that obviously if we look around,

You know,

If you look around,

Most of society is living in a fairly consistent way.

And most of society is unhappy.

So the way most people are living is not working.

But it's got a strong pull to it anyway.

I mean,

Because we're all doing it.

We're all taught to live this way.

So to sort of break away from that,

We need to consistently drop back into our consciousness,

Drop back into a mindful state.

So,

You know,

There's tricks that I've used over the years to do that.

And,

You know,

A lot of it is just capturing our attention to snap us out of the unconsciousness.

Once you recognize,

Once you just pause for a moment and realize where you are or what you're doing or that you are unconscious or something,

You know,

You've automatically broken it right then.

So it's just about becoming aware.

So one thing that I like to do is ask for help.

This is a wonderful thing to pray for because,

You know,

I think a lot of people pray in the wrong way.

You know,

We don't really,

A lot of people are running around asking for what they want.

And,

You know,

There's that very famous saying that God will,

God cannot do for us what we can do for ourselves.

And there's two sides to every coin.

So God will do for us what we can't do for ourselves.

So,

You know,

So we need to look at both sides of that coin.

And oftentimes we don't look at the other side.

We just go,

You know,

We only look at one side.

So God will do for us what we cannot do for ourselves.

If you don't believe in God,

Then the universe will.

You know,

Because it's rooting for you to expand as a being,

So it expands.

So one of the things that we can ask for help with is awareness.

Because if we're not aware,

How are we supposed to make the adjustments that we're supposed to be making?

We're unaware.

There's no hope for us to make any adjustments.

So when you ask for awareness,

That's something that if you believe in God,

That God cannot do for,

That we cannot do for ourselves.

So therefore God will do for us.

You know,

So the trick is,

Is that when we will get awareness,

If we ask for awareness,

Please help give me awareness of when I'm acting unconsciously,

When I'm not centered.

Please let me notice this quicker so I can come back to the present moment quicker.

If we ask a prayer like that,

If we put out an intention like that,

It's going to come to fruition.

It's going to happen.

And as it happens,

The trick of it is,

Is to when our attention is grabbed,

When we notice that we are being unaware,

Now all of a sudden it becomes our responsibility to follow through.

And if we do not do that,

The gift of awareness will slowly diminish until it's not there anymore,

Because we're not utilizing it.

We're not doing our part.

And what I mean by our part is when that awareness arises,

When we go,

Oh,

Like,

Geez,

I'm caught up in something or I'm,

You know,

Where was I?

A lot of times the tendency is just to dismiss it,

To say,

Well,

I'm too busy.

I'm working right now.

I'll play with this spirituality stuff about being present when I'm home,

Not doing anything,

And it's more convenient.

That's the tendency we have,

And usually we don't verbalize it that specifically,

But that's what it means.

That's what our actions show,

Our actions.

We rationalize why we can dismiss it and why we're not going to do it right now,

So we can get back on track of being busy.

And if we do that,

It's not going to work.

So when the awareness comes,

Even when it's difficult,

And we don't have to do it perfect,

But we have to really put effort into it,

As often as possible,

Just going,

Wait a minute.

Oh,

No,

I can't take a moment right now.

I'm right in the middle of something.

Wait a minute.

Just it's just a couple seconds.

Just hold on.

Just center.

Just come back to the present moment a little bit.

Now,

Can I continue doing what I'm doing in a more controlled way where I'm not just doing,

Doing,

Doing,

Doing it like in a centered way?

There.

OK,

I'm still completing my task on the computer.

I'm still doing what I need to do.

Yes,

Maybe I'm moving a little bit slower right now because I'm doing it more mindfully.

But as you get better at it,

You can function at faster paces without losing the sensation of being centered.

And that's how you can train yourself.

You know,

Take little moments.

And sometimes it's going to last three seconds and sometimes it'll last longer.

But it's about breaking the monotony of the constant pull.

And by doing that,

We regain control of our lives.

Our brain is just used to spinning.

That's why it spins,

Because that's what it's used to.

So the more we can just stop it.

And then stop it and then stop it whenever we want.

Now,

All of a sudden,

We're regaining control over our mind and our consciousness.

And we can start stopping it whenever we want,

You know,

And that's really what we're trying to achieve here.

And of course,

Not only stopping it whenever we want.

So when we go,

Hey,

I need to calm,

We go whoo and drop right down into the centered space and relax very quickly.

We'll get much better at that.

But we'll also be able to function and perform tasks more while centered.

You know,

You can practice this brushing your teeth.

Try to brush your teeth without losing the sensation of being centered.

And so that might help to the sensation of being centered.

If you're still,

I have a better,

I have better luck hanging on to a sensation,

A feeling than I do keeping my mind still.

As some of you may have guessed,

You know,

I'm like ADHD,

My mind's bouncing around and stuff.

So getting it to be still is not easy for me.

I have a better,

I have better luck not latching on to thoughts that go by than I do actually stopping them.

You know,

So that's one thing.

But what I'm talking about is I have a better,

Right now I'm talking about having,

I have better luck staying in a sensor centered space and staying connected to the feeling of being centered,

Which is a peaceful,

Calm feeling like I'm feeling it now just talking about it so I can do this and I can move around and pick up my phone.

But I picked up my phone a little too quick there and I wasn't paying attention and it went away.

But as soon as I recognized that it went away,

I put my attention back,

A portion of my attention,

And it came right back.

So now I'm centered again.

And it's like now I can feel that sensation as I'm doing it,

Moving my arms and turning around.

And you can actually learn to function centered,

You know,

But it just takes practice.

So that's some of the ways you can do it.

Do it when you're in a shower.

Experience the water falling over you instead of thinking about the 32 things that you're going to do when you get out.

You know,

Ask yourself,

Where am I a lot of times throughout the day?

And I don't mean physically,

You know,

Mentally.

Where am I?

A lot of times you're doing things and you're thinking about other things.

And it's like,

Am I here?

You know where I'm here,

I'm in my office,

In my house.

It's OK.

Just anchor into the moment.

So that is and guys,

Fire in the questions,

Man.

Questions.

The other thing I want to mention was little physical tricks,

You know,

Like,

Like for me,

I didn't wear like jewelry really at all.

So I would wear a bracelet,

Especially like a heavy bracelet or something.

And then when when it would move,

I would feel it.

And that would be a reminder of me to center myself.

I have an app on my phone.

That's called Mind Bell that goes off.

You can set it every hour,

Every two hours,

Randomly every hour,

Randomly every two hours.

So it just kind of you know,

It's not exactly on the hour and it just goes off.

And most people that know me personally know about my mind,

Bill,

Because they've heard it.

I mean,

You know,

I've been using it off and on for years.

And I say off and on because after a certain period of time,

My brain numbs out and I don't pay attention to the sound anymore.

So then I stop using it,

You know,

Because it's just background noise.

But that usually takes quite a while.

But yeah,

I have a wonderful app called Mind Bell.

Yes,

Exactly,

Sarah.

That's the same one I have.

So it's you know,

It really I thought you were reading my comment.

Oh,

Yeah.

No,

It's.

Yes.

So Sarah's got the Sarah's got the same app that I have.

That helps her.

And yeah,

I mean,

It's awesome.

I used to I got a kick out of it.

And honestly,

I used to get a kick out of it like when my son was growing up,

Because like,

You know,

Like soccer games were great because they'd always be new parents there,

You know,

Like from the other team or something or or somebody that was sitting close to me that hadn't sat close to me before or something or a family member.

And every once in a while,

My mind bell would go off.

And it's just this tone that is so peaceful.

But yet it captures people's attention almost everywhere I am,

Because I mean,

I've got my phone on me all the time,

So I could be in a store,

Soccer games anywhere.

And the thing goes off.

So and people are just like.

They hear it and they're like,

What the heck?

And they start looking and it's just soft enough where a part of them thinks they might be going crazy.

So which is which is hilarious.

And they start they start looking like,

Do you hear that?

Like,

Yes,

I hear it.

It's not in your head,

You know.

So so like,

You know,

And then,

You know,

It's always fun with people that aren't into spirituality to be like,

Yeah,

That's my mindful bell.

It like helps me come back to the present moment.

And they're like,

Oh,

OK.

OK,

Special Glenn.

Like,

You know,

They think I'm a little bit whacked,

Which I usually get a kick out of.

So.

Which is wonderful.

Sarah,

I've got all my friends trained to breathe with me.

Nice.

That's it.

You know,

Pass it along.

Hey,

If they're open to it,

You know,

If they're open to it,

Then.

You know,

Give it to them,

Show it to them,

And if they pick it up and use it,

Great.

If not,

That's cool,

Too.

They know where to find you.

You know.

That's what I like.

You know,

It's they teach you this in recovery.

It's it's attraction rather than promotion.

And I believe that to be true in anything spiritual,

Anything good.

Attraction rather than promotion.

It's.

We don't need to convince people to be spiritual or talk to talk people into being spiritual.

Like life will do that.

Life does a really good job at getting people to seek out spirituality,

Especially right now.

You know,

Because that's what that's what suffering does.

It's you know,

I don't like to see people suffering,

But it's.

But when they start talking to me and their suffering,

I get excited because it's like,

Yes,

Hopefully they're ready now.

You know,

And all we got it.

All we have to do really is just be love.

I know I've talked about this a lot lately,

And it's true.

Just be love.

We have to just continue just being who we want to be.

And I'm really taking it to a whole nother level in my personal life.

It's like this is that's my whole focus.

I mean,

Of course,

I still take action.

I'm on here on a Thursday night at seven o'clock in the D.

R.

.

So,

I mean,

I'm taking action.

I'm out here.

I'm sharing thoughts and sharing,

You know,

Things that I've learned.

I do my you know,

I'm continuing to release my podcast.

I'm continuing to work with my clients,

All that stuff.

But that is giving from the overflow and I'm diving into my own work more and more and more and just being love and letting go of all the noise that's out there.

And it's funny,

The more I do that,

The happier my life is and the better things go externally.

You know,

My business is going better and better and opportunities are coming and things that I've been trying to work through on my own here and there are just kind of opportunities and options are just falling into my lap.

And it all falls into place and comes together so much easier.

When I'm just focused on doing my work,

When I'm just focused on on just,

You know,

Being love in all situations,

Being calm in all situations.

And I don't mean to say that I do it perfectly,

You know,

But but I'm trying like heck.

And the more I put that effort into me,

You know,

I've been saying self all work is self work.

That's the fun one.

Well,

Kind of like foundation of a lot of my teachings.

Like happiness is not external.

It comes from within.

But there's always unless you're floating around all day every day and just pure peace and contentment.

And I have done that through periods of my life and I haven't done that in other periods of my life.

But unless you're there doing that,

Like,

You know,

We can go within more.

We can go within more.

And it's not to say that we're never going to experience anything negative.

That's that's not what I'm saying.

What I'm saying is that when we're really centered and we're really anchored into the deep,

Peaceful,

Loving energy that I'm talking about,

When we're really anchored into that,

When we get upset,

It's it's not we still get upset,

But it's just it doesn't own us.

It doesn't knock us off our center.

We're sitting there like,

Yeah,

I'm pissed.

OK,

Well,

You know,

If somebody is there,

They'll be like,

Well,

You are right.

You're like,

Well,

Yeah,

Fine,

But I'm just pissed.

But so you're OK being pissed?

Yeah,

I guess I am.

Yeah,

I'm OK being pissed.

And it's the same thing with sad.

You know,

We can still be sad.

Things can make us sad,

But they don't own us.

We're anchored into that deep,

You know,

That deep spirituality.

And that is actually.

Stephanie,

Kind of we're talking about this a little earlier.

It's that difference between the high and the deep.

The high is the high highs.

It's like,

Well,

You know,

My God,

Life's awesome and this is great.

And that is not maintainable.

And it's not what we're looking for.

It's not even that wonderful.

I mean,

Of course,

It's fun as all hell.

And I'm a big fan of experiencing it.

I mean,

You know,

I love doing things that get me there.

Like a lot of times life doesn't get me there.

You know,

Like I'm not one of those people that.

That like when something really good,

Like life changingly good,

Like,

I mean,

Moving to the D.

R.

,

Like I was very excited to move to D.

R.

I was like,

Holy cow.

Oh,

My God.

I'm changing my life.

How amazing.

How wonderful.

I'm going to live in paradise.

All these wonderful things where,

You know,

Like I felt them.

But like if somebody was like,

Well,

Are you excited?

Like,

I don't really know how to answer that question.

I don't.

I can't go like,

Yeah.

Oh,

My God.

I'm so excited.

And then like jump up and down like that.

Just I'm just not that person.

You know,

Some people are.

And God bless them.

I'm not that person.

But I do do things to experience high highs.

You know,

Adrenaline stuff does it for me often.

I think that's why I do it.

You know,

Go jump out of an airplane.

That's a high high for me.

And and going to waterfalls and like all kinds of stuff.

So you can experience that.

And it's fun.

And I highly recommend experiencing fun,

High,

High,

Enjoyable stuff.

But that's not that doesn't have anything to do with spirituality.

It's not spirituality.

Spirituality is a deep like contentment,

Gratitude based,

Foundational.

You can't knock me off of this.

I'm good feeling.

And like if that doesn't really sound that great.

You're not understanding it.

Yeah.

I'm sure you will.

But like because it's the best,

It's way better than a high high.

Just feeling like this centeredness of love and that you are cared for and that you're safe and that just everything's OK.

That I'm freaking good,

Man.

Like just that deep,

Deep,

Deep.

And you can feel it through your entire body.

That is what we're after.

That's what we're seeking.

That's spirituality.

That's the most powerful thing in the universe is that that that deep,

Authentic,

Autonomous.

Just.

I got this,

You know,

So we don't get knocked around by life all the time and we don't take things so seriously.

And then when we're in that vibration and we're really anchored and we're not taking things so seriously,

We can have more of those high highs.

Because it's why not just go have fun.

I mean,

It's not that big of a deal.

We're not worried about our safety and repercussions.

And oh,

My God,

What's going to happen?

We're not waiting for the other shoe to drop.

We're not like we don't have this sense of impending doom that we're going like,

Oh,

No,

Like,

Oh,

I'm happy,

But it's going to end at some point.

Because we're not taking things so seriously because life doesn't sway us around.

We're just anchored.

You know.

Come on,

People,

Where you at tonight?

I know you're watching.

I see some of you,

But I'm not seeing any questions or comments.

Sarah is helping me.

Thank you,

Sarah.

I once got people in mind at the store to download it when they heard it.

Yeah.

So Sarah is getting people to download Mind Bell in a store.

She's I should see if I could become an affiliate for Mind Bell.

I don't think so.

I don't think so.

But it is it is a great app.

Sometimes you get a mess with your phone,

Though.

Like when I first got it,

It worked really well.

And then it kind of hit a thing with all the I think it was that battery saving things that the phones do nowadays.

Let's see what we got.

I sometimes feel like people in general prefer pessimism,

Dread.

Yeah,

Well,

A lot of people do.

You know,

We do.

I mean,

Just it's kind of easy to see that,

Like whenever when someone's in bad space,

The only thing that is going to sound right is more bad space.

They're vibrating at a negative vibration.

So the only thing that matches that is the same vibration.

So,

You know,

A lot of times it's amazing how people will how hard people will fight for their right to be miserable.

You know,

Like it's you'll you'll you'll start talking to them and you'll be like,

Well,

You know,

They're like,

Oh,

Well,

You know,

My life's messed up because of this.

And you go,

Oh,

Well,

You could try that.

No,

That won't work because of this.

You know,

Oh,

OK,

Well,

What about this?

No,

That won't work because of this.

And it just batting that you can tell you haven't even finished a sentence yet.

And they've just been they haven't been listening to see if it would actually work.

They're listening to see to try to find a reason to bat it away as soon as you shut up.

You know,

So it's I mean,

It happened and I mean,

This is like I'll leave it.

I'll do it,

Too.

I'll do it.

That's why I tell people don't like if I'm if I'm really in crappy headspace,

I don't usually I generally stay away from people as much as possible.

I like go home and check out.

And if I'm with anybody,

I'll just be like,

I'm in bad headspace.

It's just nothing is going to sound good to me right now.

I'll tell them.

You know,

And then get out of it.

But it's you know,

We we we kind of.

We're so used to being a victim of life,

Because that's basically what society has taught us,

That we're victims of life.

And if a lot of people,

Even though they don't like their life,

It's a big leap to actually all of a sudden being in control of it.

And they don't think they can and they don't know how.

And it's too big of a problem to solve.

So that it's just easier to say stay as a victim,

Even though they don't like being a victim.

You know,

This was a podcast I did,

One of the first podcasts we did.

We're talking about this.

And I was and Ben and Dave,

My producers were had never heard me talk about this before.

And we're laughing so hard that we had to stop recording because we couldn't speak.

But like it's your own pile of crap.

And it stinks and it sucks,

But it's yours and you're used to it.

So like you you hang on to it.

You know,

Like it's you'll it because you're comfortable in it and it's warm and it's your crap.

And you're used to it.

So even though it stinks and it's horrible and it's bad for you,

There's a comfort level there.

So it's it's a lot of times it's easier to stay in your own crap than risk going out there.

And then,

You know,

What if I can't fix my life,

Then I'll really get depressed,

You know.

So it's that that's the leap.

That's why that's what suffering usually pushes you to.

This is why pain pushes until pleasure pulls.

So often pain pushes us to want to change.

Suffering pushes us to want to change.

Once we start making the changes,

Then the pleasure of that change starts pulling us.

And that's much more pleasurable.

So but,

You know,

When somebody is not willing,

Yeah,

There's really nothing that you can do.

And Kate says,

Cozy prison.

Yeah,

It's your cozy.

We make our own prison.

It's it's it's a cozy little spa and it's ours,

But it's of our own making.

So let's see.

Nicole's asking,

How do you deal with people who bat suggestions away?

Do you give up?

Good question.

I I the short answer is yes.

Yeah,

I just don't look at it as giving up because that is such a negative connotation.

So I don't call it giving up.

I just call it,

You know,

Like seeing the writing on the wall.

It's,

You know,

The definition of insanity,

Doing the same thing over and over,

Expecting a different result.

If somebody shows you that their mind is closed,

Why are you going to waste your time and their time and actually end up pissing them off more by constantly giving them suggestions?

That,

You know,

If they're batting them away,

They're saying,

I don't want to hear that.

I don't want to hear suggestions.

I don't want to hear suggestions.

I'm not going to listen to your suggestions.

That's what they're saying when they bat them away.

So listen to them.

They're they're telling you that they are not interested in hearing your suggestions.

So,

You know,

So I just usually with me,

You know,

Like I've been doing this for a while.

I've been doing this for a while and I'm such a life coach.

It's just who I am.

Like I like I try to fix shit.

That's who I am.

It's what I do.

It's such a part of me that like it spills out into a lot of my life.

So I,

You know,

I have to be careful with friends and stuff like that,

That I don't dive into it too much.

But like everybody kind of knows that's who I am.

So I,

I think I have the ability to be more honest with people and upfront with people than maybe the normal average person does.

You know,

Most people,

I think I would suggest to most of my clients and people listening that you just kind of change the subject or drop it.

Just don't you know,

If they're batting your suggestions away,

Just let it go,

Man.

I mean,

If they want to be miserable,

Let them be miserable.

It's OK.

You know,

They'll come around.

There's going to be a time when they want the suggestions,

You know.

So faith's laying down with me.

Hi,

Faith.

Let me see if I can show you guys.

Faith,

There she is.

So,

Yeah,

I have like oftentimes I'll just call it like it is.

I'll just tell people,

I'll be like,

You know,

Especially if it's one of my clients,

I have to.

I have to call them on it.

Like that's my job,

Literally.

So like if it's one of my clients and it's like,

OK,

Well,

You know,

What I'm doing is I'm giving you options and you're just batting them away.

Like I,

You know,

I have to call them on it and kind of hold them.

That's so,

You know,

Again,

I don't recommend this in most situations out there.

But if if you're close with somebody,

Maybe it's a close friend and they know you're really trying to help,

You might be able to break through that by kind of holding them there.

A lot of what I do is really hold people still in very uncomfortable places as they try to squirm out of them and use all their rationalization techniques and defense mechanisms and just hold them there and hold them there and hold them there.

And just not allow their defense mechanisms to work or not allow their rationalizations to work and just hold them in their comfortability.

And then after a little while,

It's like you can feel the energy just kind of release and they relax a little bit.

And then I can give them the the the solutions and help them through,

You know,

Which that.

Usually it goes well because I'm doing it with life coaching clients and life coaching clients come to me because they want help.

So that dynamic is there.

So if I'm holding people somewhere,

Usually most often they will stay there with me.

And and plus my energy is coming from love and they can feel that.

So usually they'll stay with me and then we'll we'll break through it so that it works at least probably 95 percent of the time.

Every once in a blue moon,

There is somebody that has a wall of fear that they are just incapable of breaking through at that time.

And I'll hold them there and I'll hold them there and I'll hold them there.

And eventually they just lash out.

And then everything's my fault,

Usually.

I mean.

You know,

It's it's well,

It's directed at me in some way.

It has to be because it has to be because I'm the only other one there and it ain't their fault.

So so it's either you know,

It can get ugly.

They can actually lash out at me in an ugly way.

Or oftentimes they'll just lash out in a way where it's like I'm just either I don't understand or I.

I'm not I'm not good at what I do.

And I'm not phrasing that exactly right,

But I'm incapable of helping them or something like that.

Usually that's what it comes out comes to.

If somebody has just such a wall of fear where they've decided to where they were trying to open when I was holding them there and then it came decision time,

They either pop open or they lock back down.

And some people,

Every once in a blue moon,

The pain is just too much and they just lock back down tight.

And that's when that happens,

Which is fine,

You know,

At least there,

You know,

That's where they are.

And then sometimes they come back a year or two later and they're like,

Hey,

You know what?

I wasn't ready.

You know,

Sometimes people just aren't ready.

They think they're ready,

But when they really face that that wall of fear,

They're just like it's just too big and it's just they tighten back up.

They have to go out and experiment a little bit more.

They have to go out and,

You know,

Run into a few more brick walls and then they come back and they're like,

Oh,

OK,

Now I fully understand that there is no other way I have to go through,

You know,

Which is great.

I love when people come back to me like that because that's like they are ready,

Man.

If you like you say jump,

They go how high,

You know,

Those are the that's it's great working with people like that because they're just so ready.

And that's when that change really happens so quickly.

You know,

The change happens.

The more you implement what is talked about,

You know,

Like so we you know,

I've just been talking for over a half an hour about stuff and there are going to be two types of people.

You know,

Some people are going to listen to this and they can go,

Wow,

That was good.

You know,

Well,

I guess three types of people.

One part one group is going to be like he's full of crap.

He's a me.

Then there's the other group that's going to be like,

Wow,

I really like that.

That kind of makes sense.

It resonates with me.

I get it.

I understand what he's saying.

Okay,

Cool.

And then they'll just go back to their everyday lives.

They might try to implement it here and there if they think of it,

If they're not too busy.

And their life may or may not get a little bit better,

But it's really not going to be that big of a deal.

And then those people will either,

You know,

Like get into more suffering and then actually make some changes.

Or some of those people get addicted to information.

And because the information makes you feel better,

Listening to this type of stuff makes you feel a little bit better,

A little bit more hopeful.

This is not spirituality.

This is a signpost towards it.

You actually becoming spiritual,

Actually becoming happier is implementing the stuff into your life on a daily basis.

That's what actually changes your life.

So the more the people do that,

Their lives will change dramatically in a very short period,

Which is very exciting.

That's why I get excited the more suffering somebody is in.

It doesn't have to come through suffering.

It just usually does.

If somebody comes to me and they're not suffering that much,

But they're just like,

Man,

I got a taste of what is out there and it is awesome.

It is beautiful.

It is love.

And I want it.

I'm going to chase it,

Man.

I want everything.

Just tell me what to do and I'm gone.

And they go with that attitude like that.

It's awesome.

It's awesome.

So let's see.

Sarah said,

Hi,

Faith.

Did she?

There she is.

Hi,

Faith.

You got a hi.

She's walking around.

See.

And Sarah,

It might be too late for this.

I know you commented like 10 minutes ago or more.

That ties into what you talked about last week.

If it's still pertinent,

You can expand on that if you want.

Nicole,

Do you have any clients in the DR?

I do.

I do have some clients here.

Yeah.

Yeah,

It's.

It's cool.

I was actually just talking to somebody today about.

Possibly creating something.

I mean,

It was,

You know,

It's just like a very brief conversation and I'm sure we'll talk about it more.

And if it comes to fruition,

Great.

But but,

You know,

We're talking about how wonderful it is living here.

And he's from the States,

Too.

And it's just like,

Wow.

It's just,

You know,

So many people could change their lives experiencing.

Someplace like here and some people.

It's easier to transition your life over here than people realize.

And it's like so many people thinking outside the box,

We might try creating something where we kind of help people,

Not only in a.

Just in all senses,

Like move their life over to here,

You know?

And of course,

I would be the life coaching part of that because I mean,

You it's not what we do.

Like if if you're unhappy in the United States and you're going to come to the DR and think you're going to be happy,

It ain't going to happen.

I can tell you that right now.

That's not how it works.

You know,

We used to say in recovery,

If an asshole gets on a plane in Massachusetts,

An asshole gets off the plane in Florida.

There's no geographical cures.

I mean,

That's not that's not how it works.

No matter where you go,

There you are.

So so the the the work is.

Is internal,

You know,

So that's kind of why if we design something,

Then I would bring in the life coaching aspect of that and be like,

You know,

Let's make sure your intentions are right.

What what type of life are you trying to create?

How do you want to create that?

What does that look like?

So once you get a clear intention and you understand how to bring happiness into your life,

Because I mean,

This sounds it sounds kind of silly.

But,

You know,

I've heard Oprah talk about it and other people talk about it.

And it's it's like if you ask people,

What do you want out of life?

They'll I want to be I want to be happy.

OK,

How much have you how much effort have you put into into being happy?

Like,

Well,

What do you mean?

Yes,

Exactly.

So everybody wants to be happy,

But oftentimes we don't know what it looks like and we don't know how to achieve it.

You know,

So I mean,

We're kind of bouncing around ideas of of trying to help people with that,

Help people find the courage needed to make those big changes.

Absolutely.

It's part of it,

You know.

Oh,

And Sarah said what we're talking about last time,

Wanting to help people who aren't ready.

Right.

Yeah.

If they're just not ready,

It's OK,

Man.

Let them let them continue living their life when they are ready.

They will want to change.

And now let's see,

We've got I don't know if I know Jennifer struggling,

Struggling with health anxiety,

Living fear based because of childhood trauma.

Any tips for intrusive thoughts and catastrophic thinking?

Yeah.

You know,

I mean,

Obviously this is this is big.

Let me just see what I'm you know,

I mean,

This is I could go on for a couple hours on this.

It's just so juicy.

So I'm just going to try to get still and see,

You know,

What really wants to be addressed or what I should address now.

So I think it's the intrusive thoughts and catastrophic thinking,

Because it kind of this it kind of points back towards the health anxiety and fear based because of childhood trauma anyway.

You know,

But I do I got to touch on the childhood trauma because this flashed in front of me earlier.

Maybe that's why Jennifer is asking this question.

So the childhood trauma,

You know,

The thing that we have to understand about childhood trauma is that it's not as hard to get over as people think it is.

I shouldn't say that it can be it can be hard to get over.

It's not easy.

I don't mean to imply it's easy.

It can be difficult to get over.

But it's simple.

And I think that that is one of the biggest things that people don't understand about about a lot of spiritual work,

Including childhood trauma.

The system is rigged for us to to survive,

To thrive,

To to work through this stuff.

The whole point that like there would not be childhood trauma on this planet unless it was pushing us towards where we wanted to go.

That's what suffering does,

Is it pushes us towards where we want to go if we allow it.

And trauma is I get it.

It's hard,

Man.

I'm not you know,

I'm not trying to minimize the childhood trauma.

I mean,

It's it's big.

It's huge.

I get it.

But it doesn't mean that it can't be our catalyst.

Like this is this is what this is one of the main things I learned.

This is this is why I can help people.

I swear to God,

This is one of the biggest insights I've ever gotten.

And it's why I am capable of helping people is because I at some point when I woke up,

I understood that it doesn't matter the flavor of the dysfunction.

It doesn't matter that much if you're if you're talking about like a garden variety,

Not feeling good about yourself in a fairly functional household.

And childhood trauma.

They're very different externally.

They feel very different.

The manifestations are very different.

The levels of suffering are dramatically different.

I get that they're very different in many,

Many ways externally.

And the way we're used to looking at them,

They're very,

Very,

Very different.

But that's not where the solution is.

That's where the problem is.

The problems are very,

Very,

Very different.

But when you stop looking at the solution,

The solutions are the same.

And that's spiritual law.

So if you have a dysfunction,

You can transcend it.

Now,

Some are going to be harder than others because of the external and the grip that they have and all that stuff.

But the dynamics are the same.

So it like I can sometimes it's easier to pull somebody out of a childhood trauma than it is to pull somebody out of a garden variety.

I don't feel good enough because the suffering is more and the suffering will push you to do anything to not experience it anymore.

Where over here,

People who haven't suffered that much,

They're like,

Yeah,

It hurts,

But they don't have the push that people that have trauma have.

So if you use it in your favor and you understand that it's I get it,

It's hard,

It's been difficult.

But the dynamics of shifting something are not complicated.

It's not complicated.

Like it just,

You know,

We can go in there and work through childhood trauma in a very specific way.

All it takes is opening.

That's it.

It just takes opening to to look at things differently.

So these are the three things that are necessary for change and open mind,

Open mindedness,

Honesty and willingness.

You have to be open minded even when somebody is saying like childhood trauma has such a such a hard pull.

It's so much energy.

It's so negative.

That that like it's hard to stay open through that,

But if you can,

That's where that's where the changes.

If you say if you can stay open minded to to understanding that you can be beyond it,

That's open minded.

There's a possibility.

That's all you need.

Just understand.

Just opening.

Just the crack.

Just enough to know,

Just to hope you don't even have to know,

You just have to hope that maybe possibly someday if the stars align just perfectly,

Maybe there might be another way to live that's beyond that trauma.

Maybe that's all you need.

That's open mindedness.

That's the little slot that's needed for the solution to squeak through.

That's it.

That's all you need.

Open mindedness.

And then the other two things is you need to honesty and willingness.

You need to be willing to stand any uncomfortability that I was talking about earlier,

Because I will hold you there.

And you can transcend it,

But it's going to be uncomfortable and you're not going to like it.

And you're going to want to squirm away and lean back on old defense mechanisms that have gotten you this far.

But you have to be willing to stand in it and you have to be able to be honest with yourself.

I mean,

Honest with me?

Yeah,

Kind of.

But I can see through that.

So it's really not that big of a deal about being honest with me.

You need to be honest with yourself.

That's what you need to be honest with.

And,

You know,

And understanding.

So when I'm showing you stuff and those rationalizations and defense mechanisms come in that you want to lean on and squirm your way out to stay back stuck.

That you're able to be honest with yourself and go,

No,

That I'm just trying to rationalize my way out of this.

I know it's uncomfortable.

I know it's hard,

But I need to stay in it.

And that's basically it.

That's the open mindedness,

Honesty and willingness that it takes.

I'm hopeful and open.

I just tend to approach everything with fear.

Yeah,

Well,

That's of course,

Of course you do.

You know,

Because that I mean,

That's what childhood trauma does is it makes us approach everything with fear.

So,

You know,

I don't,

I'm going to try to keep this a little bit broad because I want everybody to get it.

And if I get too specific,

A lot of times without knowing the person,

I don't want to turn you off or other people off that are listening by getting too specific because there's multiple ways to come at this to get the same solution,

Depending on your belief systems.

See,

It doesn't,

That's what's beautiful about spiritual law.

It doesn't matter if you believe in God,

The universe,

Nothing.

I don't give a crap what you believe in.

It's like you can get to the same place.

It's law.

It's just universal law.

It's how things work.

So you get there.

You can get there.

So it's just a matter of learning about if you're approaching everything with fear,

Then you're fearful.

Right?

So what we need to do is understand where that fear comes from,

Maybe briefly,

But that's short.

Mostly what you have to understand is you have an old belief system,

Right?

So this was created usually between the ages of four and eight,

Like basically all our belief systems were.

Sometimes it changed or reinforced at later ages,

But,

And sometimes they're even created at other ages,

But like most of the time,

That's where they're created.

So having a little understanding on,

You know,

Our belief system is helpful,

But that's the problem.

We don't stay there long.

We're more focused on the solution.

So it's about understanding the solution.

And I don't believe,

I consider myself a spiritual realist,

So I don't want anybody to believe some woo woo crap.

Just let go and let God and like,

How,

Like,

How are you supposed to do that?

So,

I mean,

Really getting to a logical conclusion of why you shouldn't be fearful.

Why it literally makes no sense to be fearful.

That's where you need to get to in a way that you understand it,

Not in a way that I understand it.

I have my own understanding and I'm not interested in teaching you or anybody else my understanding.

I can use it as a guide and a hint and stuff like that to try to get you to figure out your understanding.

But I want you to understand,

You have to understand logically.

It has to make sense to you why you should be and you can,

And it makes sense to approach things without fear.

Once you get real good clarity on that,

Then you can start replacing the belief system of why you're approaching things with fear.

You know,

And it's,

It's really,

It's simple.

It's simple.

It's a simple thing to do.

Not always easy.

You know,

It depends.

It's,

I mean,

Sometimes we can blow through it in a day and then you just implement it and reinforce it.

It really depends on how ready you are.

You know,

I've been saying this a lot lately since I heard it in the time of the Six Sun documentary.

As soon as I heard it,

I was like,

I was with my friend and we're both like,

Wow,

I like,

I like the way that's phrased.

It doesn't take time.

It takes alignment.

You know,

Like we can blast through this stuff in very short periods of time.

My entire world spun around on a dime in three months.

I was a homeless alcoholic maniac doing drugs,

Getting in fights,

1400 miles from my son.

Couldn't hold a job mess every area of my life to completely hopeful walking around in peace and love.

People walking up to me going,

What happened to you?

They could see it from across the room.

Like I had a glow about me.

My entire world changed in three months.

A hundred percent.

So it doesn't take time.

It takes alignment.

You know,

That's why,

Again,

That's why it's so exciting and fun to work with people that are really ready because it's like,

They just drop into alignment so quickly that,

You know,

You see the light come on in their eyes and life come back and the hope and the spark and the enthusiasm.

It's a beautiful thing.

It's been my favorite thing since I woke up.

I used to say it when I was involved in AA and recovery all the time.

And I still say it to this day.

And you can hear it over the phone.

You can see it in zoom.

So I don't have to even be in person to experience it.

You can feel it.

It's energetic.

So you can feel it when people like,

When the light goes on,

You know,

Like really.

And they experience it.

You have to,

It's not just when I'm talking.

It's like when they go out in life and they implement it and everything goes and it,

And then they get back on the phone with you and they're like,

Oh my God,

This is,

You know,

Like you can feel that.

It's just,

It's my favorite thing in the world.

It's,

I love it.

Yeah.

In cases,

False evidence appearing real.

Yeah.

That's,

That's what fear is,

You know,

And,

And we,

We need to work through that.

Jen,

Thank you.

I listen to all of your podcasts.

Very helpful.

I'm glad,

I'm glad.

Thank you,

Jen.

And thanks for tuning in here and throwing a great question too.

That was an excellent question.

And,

And it felt good to lean into that and just get that stuff out.

And yeah,

You know,

Jen and anybody else,

You know,

If,

If you have specific questions,

Shoot me an email.

You know,

I'll do what I can and you know,

Just make the connection.

If,

If you're thinking about,

If you're thinking about working with me or any other life coach,

For that matter,

If the way I say things clicks with you,

Then that's the best way to pick a life coach.

If the way somebody else says something clicks with you and resonates,

Then that's a good reason to pick them for a life coach.

But speaking for me,

If,

You know,

If you're interested in it,

Reach out,

You know,

Just reach out.

You never know what's going to happen.

Some people like,

You know,

We,

We hit the brakes too much.

Sometimes there's ways to,

To,

To accomplish things that,

That we never would have thought of.

I do that all the time.

Almost everything that I've,

I have conversations with people all the time about what other people would deem useless,

Meaningless,

Ridiculous stuff.

I just sit down and talk with people and it's amazing how much good stuff comes out when,

When you just make a connection with somebody,

You know.

All right.

Well,

I think that's going to do it for tonight.

Sarah says,

Thank you.

You are truly appreciated.

Well,

I appreciate you guys too.

You know,

I,

This makes me feel alive.

So it's,

I couldn't do it without you guys.

Kate,

So glad you had a dog's name is Faith and not Shark,

Especially as you walk on those beautiful beaches out there.

Yeah,

Shark.

That,

That would be,

I probably shouldn't be yelling Shark out there.

Although lately,

Most of the people have not been out there again.

It got a little busy with the holidays and the Dominican holidays.

And then now it's like peaceful and quiet out there again,

Which I love.

So,

All right,

Everybody.

Thank you for listening.

And what the heck do I do?

Well,

Oh,

Don't forget my website.

Where's my,

Well,

I think I hide that.

Click that.

This is my website.

Very difficult to remember.

Glen Ambrose dot com.

So yes,

Go there.

All my stuff's on there.

And I think that's it.

So I am going to say goodbye.

And I am going to bolt.

Do you see how I just want to say this for a second.

Do you see how my mind works people?

Like every week I have to go back to my instructions and figure out what I'm doing to end this.

My mind,

Like,

This is kind of what almost,

It's not a detriment because I don't really care,

But my mind like just throws information out that I'm not going to like I will,

I will do this and I will forget how to do it as soon as I'm done doing it.

Like it just doesn't retain a lot of information like it used to because I just don't function from the brain that much anymore.

It's just in the moment and what flows through me.

And that's most of what,

So I have to make like a concerted effort to actually remember things now.

Like what I would deem normally useless things.

Or day to day things.

Like I actually have to make an effort to remember things now because I just kind of use them for what I need to and then they just go off the page.

I think it's funny.

That's why I brought it up.

I was thinking about it before the show started and I was like,

This is funny.

I think I'm going to tell people that that's how my mind works now.

So,

All right.

Thanks everybody.

I'm going to click this and I think this is going to kick me out later.

.