How To Deal With The Fear Of The Unknown! #216

Welcome to the Soul Infused Monday show episode 216 called How to Deal with the Fear of the Unknown.

And I'm currently in Colombia,

Arrived here.

And only on Saturday,

I arrived here in Medellin in this big city.

And I'm not settled in yet.

I don't know much yet.

I'm so in the unknown that I think this topic is just so perfect.

And I also want to say that what I'm going to share is my personal experience,

What I'm doing,

Things that I think would be helpful for you,

You pick and choose whatever resonates with you.

And the unknown can be so different for different people,

Obviously.

The fear of the unknown is something that we human beings have,

Everyone,

Like it by default,

We are afraid of the unknown.

And that's okay.

At the same time,

Sometimes the fear of the unknown really keeps us from moving forward or keeps us from doing things we would love to do.

Fear in general keeps us from doing things.

And we know that however,

The fear of the unknown is a particularly strong one.

So I'm going to share a few things that I'm experiencing.

And I also want to give a disclaimer right away.

When there's something in the unknown,

It's not comfortable.

It is what it is.

So it's really a question on how to deal with it and how to approach it,

So that you can navigate through that.

Because it's not that there's a magic trick,

And suddenly you don't,

You don't feel the unknown anymore,

Right?

I want to be very clear.

Now,

For you,

It doesn't necessarily need to mean that you are traveling and you are not knowing where you're going to be next,

Or you are in the midst of trying to find a new home and you are literally kind of homeless by choice,

Right?

But find your own version of the fear of the unknown.

And also,

From a spiritual perspective,

There's really nothing that is in control anyway.

However,

We can have a sense of safety when we have things that we somehow know we can control in some way,

Or we know we're going to go next.

At the same time,

Anything can shift in any moment.

And it's good to have the capacity to deal with the unknown in a way that allows you to still do the things that you like,

And you're not caught up with it or too overwhelmed by it.

And I would love to hear from you.

How is the fear of the unknown showing up in your life?

Take a moment,

Take a moment and tune in and ask yourself the question,

How does the fear of the unknown show up in my life?

How do I navigate through it?

And or maybe also ask yourself the question,

What are maybe some of the things I'm not doing because of that fear?

Take a breath and ask yourself those questions.

And even if you don't have an answer right now,

Write them down,

Ponder upon that,

Like ponder around it,

Journey around it.

What does it mean to you?

So for me currently,

It means that when I came here on Saturday into the big city,

I have not been in such a big city,

And this is like a 2.

5 million city.

I am not even a city person.

When I knew I was coming here on Saturday,

I felt so anxious,

Like my inner child was freaking out.

I don't know anyone in this city.

I had researched some things,

I connected with some Facebook groups.

The main objective for me to be in this big city is that I want to dance.

So I connected with a few dance schools.

Long story short,

I was coming into a city,

Into a country that I've never been before.

I don't know anyone here.

And of course,

Of course,

There's anxiety.

I'm a human being.

My inner child was terrified,

And that's okay.

Now I was very clear,

I wanted to do it anyway.

And here are some of the things that I did and I do that might be helpful for you.

And again,

I want to say one thing.

When you embark on a new journey,

When you embark on something that you haven't figured out completely yet,

When you want to do something that you've never done before,

When there is a fear of the unknown,

Because you're literally in the unknown,

It is not going to be comfortable,

And you got to be okay with that.

I often hear that statement,

You have to become comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Now I want to change that because I don't think that's necessarily true.

Because the truth is,

As long as there's discomfort,

You are uncomfortable.

As soon as you are comfortable with that,

Then you are already outside of that uncomfortable state of being.

So it's not so much about feeling comfortable with being in this comfort.

It's more about approaching it with the mindset of I know I'm going to be uncomfortable for a little while and that's okay,

And I can handle it.

Does that make sense?

I find it it sounds nice and often in the personal development world,

Yeah,

Just be uncomfortable with being outside your comfort zone.

It's not that easy.

It's freaking uncomfortable,

And that's okay.

I keep repeating it because if you have the illusion or the belief that,

Oh,

It's going to be so easy and comfortable,

And I don't get to deal with the discomfort,

That's not the truth.

At least I don't have a recipe for that one yet.

However,

You can do certain things to embrace it and then to also enjoy the process.

Or if you don't enjoy the process,

You just go through the process anyway,

Because what's on the other side,

It's worth it.

On Saturday,

When I was freaking out,

I was breathing through it and I did certain tools that I know of course I meditate,

I meditate every day.

So I did my meditation and then I felt that anxiety in my body,

This feeling of your heart is pounding and there's tension and your chest is kind of vibrating and my child was anxious.

And then I did some movement because that usually helps me.

I danced a little bit.

I simply danced to keep moving.

I also let myself cry because it was so much tension,

It was so much pressure,

It was so much anxiety that literally I felt my inner child wanted to cry.

So I cried and that felt good.

It released some of the stress.

I relaxed a little bit and then I took a very cold shower and I was in the mountains.

I was so cold.

I haven't been freezing in a long time.

I've been living in the Caribbean or in the tropics for the last 11 years.

I was freezing my butt off.

I took a cold shower and then I felt like I was more ready.

However,

What made the biggest difference,

What helped me actually the most is to accept that I was uncomfortable and that I was a part of me really feeling anxious.

And I got that image.

I spoke about this in a previous Soul Infused Monday show when I shared the lesson that I learned from nature in Costa Rica about the river.

The lesson in a nutshell,

What I shared was you are like the river.

You're constantly moving.

There's constantly change and yet you're safe because the river always finds its way.

Now there was more to it,

But I used that analogy and I had that image that when we are afraid of the unknown,

It's as if we are in this stream,

A river and my image was that it flowing downwards and you are in this river floating down very fast.

As if you are part of the waterfall and you're in that river and you don't know yet where you're going to land.

You don't know exactly when and it's fast and it's scary.

And I felt,

Okay,

You simply get to be there anxious and let yourself be brought down there.

Does that make sense?

I don't find the right words right now to express it.

But the image was me being in the stream,

In this fast stream of water and not knowing exactly how long it's going to be and not knowing exactly where I'm going to land.

And with that image,

I could also relax because I knew it will be over at some point and I will arrive where I'm meant to be.

And the other thing when I was,

I was walking yesterday,

So I'm in this Airbnb just for a few days until Thursday until I find something else,

But I wanted to have something to land.

And I was going somewhere and I got lost.

I found it very confusing.

I'm still transitioning into this new matrix of energy.

This is a huge city.

A lot of impressions,

A lot of people,

The energy is buzzing.

I get to actually transition.

It takes a couple of days.

It's not easy to come from something so quiet to a matrix that is so energetically full constantly.

So I was walking and I got lost a little bit and it was confusing.

The GPS was confusing on my phone.

And at some point I said to myself,

Just keep walking,

Just keep walking.

And I just kept walking and I just kept walking and I can't trust it that I will find it.

And of course I did.

It took me 15 minutes long and I think I just really walked around the wrong place,

But I arrived there and it was good.

And it took me a little bit and I'm still taking me to settle in.

But the fear of the unknown,

And this is just an example from traveling,

You might feel it in a very different way.

Maybe it's a fear of the unknown about your health.

Maybe it's the fear of the unknown in a relationship or around your business or job-related or money-related.

The fear of the unknown can show up in many different ways.

And we all have that in common.

As human beings,

As I said before,

By default,

We are afraid of the unknown and that's totally okay.

That's totally okay.

It's also totally okay to feel anxious sometimes.

And the most important thing is really to be in acceptance with it and to look at it and hold space for it and not to pretend you shouldn't feel this way or to judge yourself that you are afraid and that you should do better.

It's also okay that when you are in an anxious feeling because you don't really know what's coming,

That a part of us wants to control the environment.

That we go into old patterns of maybe controlling or I had a moment yesterday where I ate way too much and stuff that I usually don't eat.

But it triggered that feeling of an old pattern to create some safety even though it's not maybe the healthiest thing.

And that's okay too.

We get to navigate through that.

And what I wish or part of me sharing this is that you don't let that fear hold you back so that you can really do whatever it is that you want to do.

And not to wait until that fear is gone because the fear might be there forever.

The intensity and how you deal with it.

The one other thing I wanted to share is when we are afraid of the unknown,

I perceive it sometimes as black.

One thing that helped me as well that might not resonate with you.

But I was tuning into that fear of the unknown.

I was really sitting there and I was like,

Why is this so uncomfortable?

How does it feel?

What is it?

And I was really looking at it.

I wasn't judging it.

I wasn't trying to get rid of it.

I wasn't fighting it.

I was being with it.

And for me,

It felt like a black space,

An emptiness,

A nothingness.

And that was good for me because I'm actually not afraid of the dark.

I don't feel the darkness.

I actually enjoy it.

I like to be out when it's dark,

Especially in nature.

I remember in Mexico,

I did once a ceremony where we were in a kind of like a cave.

It was pitch black.

And for most people,

One of the biggest things to look at was the darkness.

Now,

Granted,

It was only like for a few hours,

But that I reminded myself,

I'm actually not afraid of darkness.

I am not afraid of darkness.

So that helped me to deal with the fear of the unknown.

And I felt like I simply get to be in that space until I'm out again.

And the other thing is that the fear of the unknown is like being in a gap.

This is what you know.

This is the unknown.

In between,

There's a gap.

There's a gap of emptiness.

The old is not anymore what you might want,

But the new hasn't unfolded yet.

So you are in the gap.

And that gap is actually a beautiful place to be if we can bear it.

Because the old is gone.

The new is not there.

You are literally a blank piece of paper,

Open to be painted on.

And you get to choose what you create.

There are a lot of beautiful things about embarking on the unknown consciously.

And at the same time,

Of course,

It's scary.

So I want to leave you with that today.

And I hope something resonated with you.

Tune in for a moment and share with me what landed for you today.

What is your biggest takeaway?

And share with me.

If you're live right now,

Leave a comment below.

If you're watching the replay,

Leave me a comment below.

And if you're listening to this on Inside Timer or Spotify,

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Leave me a review.

Share it in a message.

I always love to hear from you.

And I'm going to take a moment and see some of the comments.

And if you also have any questions,

Please let me know.

I always love to engage with you.

I'm going to share a recap of a few of the things that I find most valuable in my journey.

First,

I want to share a few things that I find most valuable in my journey.

First,

Embarking on the unknown is uncomfortable and that's okay.

There's no magic pill.

You get to navigate through it.

Be an acceptance of that.

It's okay to be afraid and it's okay to be anxious sometimes.

Hold space for it and do it anyway.

That's a big piece.

Also,

Address the underlying issues.

Check with your smaller step towards the big unknown.

And movement,

Meditate,

Move,

Do something that also helps you to reduce the intensity of it.

And remind yourself,

Like I talk to myself all the time.

We all do,

By the way.

However,

When you do it consciously,

It's sometimes more valuable because often we are just in judgment and automatic dialogue that we are not even aware of.

Talk to yourself,

Remind yourself of the things that you have accomplished.

Be your own best cheerleader.

Grab yourself by the hand and just go for it.

And be okay with being uncomfortable.

Not comfortable being uncomfortable.

Be okay that it's going to be uncomfortable for a little while,

That you're in this river stream,

Not knowing where right,

Left and center is.

And trust,

Trust,

Connect to your higher self,

Connect to your soul.

Allow yourself to be guided.

Allow yourself to be guided.

And magic might come out of it on the other side.

I'm going to take a moment here and then I'm going to let you go.

Acknowledge that you will be uncomfortable for a little while.

Huge takeaway.

Thank you for sharing.

And Debbie is loving the image of the gap being like a blank slate to paint and to create.

Beautiful.

Yes.

Trust the process.

Great takeaway.

Fear of unknown is just the gap waiting to be created.

Beautiful takeaway.

The space between the old and new is a blank slate.

Good one.

Okay.

This is really helpful.

Check with inner child and take a tiny step.

You can take beautiful takeaway.

Be okay with the discomfort.

River steam,

Mirror stream is an aha image for me.

Beautiful.

Embrace it,

Be with it,

Move except being in the uncomfortable.

Beautiful.

So last one I'm going to share,

Keeping moving my energy.

I remembered to dance also this morning whilst I was a project on that keeps me stuck in thinking too much.

Good to be reminded again.

Beautiful game.

Beautiful,

Beautiful.

Well,

Thank you for being here today.

Thank you for being on this journey with me.

Thank you for your good wishes.

And I will be still in Colombia next week on Monday somewhere else.

I don't know where.

So I'm still in the unknown and I'm navigating through this with you.

And I'm wishing you a wonderful rest of your Monday,

A soul infused week.

And I'm super,

Super excited to see you next Monday again at 9am Pacific,

12pm Eastern time.

And if you haven't left your biggest takeaway yet,

I super appreciate it.

And I will get back to it and read any any comment you leave later on.

Much,

Much,

Much love.