61. The True You: How To Reach Your Potential Through Self-Assessment

If we're not constantly assessing ourselves,

Then we're never going to become the person we're meant to become.

The main goal is how do I really manifest the great potential and light of my soul in this world?

And the only way that that happens is if I am consistently changing.

I want to just take us back to where most people live,

And they live in the realm of my dreams,

My destiny,

My desired outcome is so far out there,

And I'm going to work really hard every day to eventually get there.

And in the process,

They judge themselves so completely that they almost paralyze and immobilize themselves.

There is the danger,

Which a lot of people fall to,

That in the process of self-assessment,

It leads to self-judgment.

And that's why when we talk about spiritual work,

It has to be constant and tremendous effort because the ego is so powerful.

How else will you match it?

How else will you meet it?

It's very important.

Very important.

Welcome to the Spiritually Hungry podcast,

Episode 61.

So I'm sure our listeners are really busy this week practicing non-judgment.

And we were thinking about it a lot as well after we left the last episodes,

We decided to go further and deeper in this topic and really talk about what is a healthy or proactive way to judge oneself.

And again,

The word judgment,

I am allergic to.

So I think it is aligned with self-assessment,

Self-awareness,

Feedback,

Internal feedback,

Internal validation,

That's the direction we're going in.

Yeah,

Interesting,

But the phrase that the Kabbalists use is the accounting of our soul.

Oh,

Good.

Because that's what I was thinking too.

And also discernment,

Right?

Right.

Right.

Assessment,

Discernment.

Yeah.

Judgment just is.

.

.

Too fraught.

.

.

.

Oozing with bad juju.

So I just want to pick up a little bit where we left off last week to review.

A judgment is the sum of our thoughts,

Feelings,

And observations.

And our brain is forced to make tons of judgments every day,

Some good,

Some bad,

Some neutral.

So we delved into that last week.

And just some examples,

Right,

Of when we use judgment and when we need it to keep us safe.

So let's say we're visiting a new place,

We might research crime rates to assess how safe it is to walk alone at night.

Now I would never do that.

You probably would more than me.

But I'll give you a story that happened a few hours ago.

We were driving for about 15 minutes and full disclosure,

I was feeling a little grumpy today.

I did not notice.

You did your best not to notice.

And I'm driving,

Driving,

And then all of a sudden I see something moving on the steering wheel and it's a big,

Big spider.

And I'm saying like the size bigger than my thumbnail.

Okay,

Michael,

You were across on the side of me.

I was there at his death.

No.

I saw his dead body.

So in that moment,

I had a judgment call to make,

Right?

So I started to freak out,

Right?

It's about to go on my hand and it looks and had white spots on this black body.

So I think it was poisonous.

And I started swerving a bit into the other lane.

You're like,

Pull over,

Pull over.

And all I'm thinking about is what is the greater danger in this moment,

Right?

That was my judgment.

Is it maybe getting into an accident?

There are other people in the car,

God forbid.

Or this poisonous,

Humongous spider biting me.

And the selfless choice was to endanger the four of us.

So I pulled over and I jumped out of the car and I hurt my already injured ankle in the process.

And yes,

We gave it a burial and the death came for this little spider.

But so that's the point,

Right?

We have moments in life where we need to make immediate decisions,

Judgments,

And some will be right and some will be wrong.

So when we talk about judgments,

It can reinforce our desires,

Our values and our needs,

Right?

Because again,

And we can choose a different word if you want,

But we'll just call it judgments for now.

So let's say for example,

If it's about food,

Right?

It's something that we deal with every single day.

We judge some foods are higher quality,

Some are lower quality,

Right?

I think we'd all agree on that.

Our judgments help us decide which food we want to eat if we desire and value living a healthy lifestyle.

We'll inevitably ask ourselves which food's going to nourish my body,

My soul,

Fuel my brain,

Give me energy to accomplish what I want today.

And the fact is some foods will accomplish this task more than others.

So in order to act in alignment with our desire and our values,

We need to make judgments.

And I can give like lists and lists on why judgment's important.

But I think the key is how do we make it a positive experience and how do we trust where it's coming from versus making decisions that are harmful to ourselves and to others?

Well again,

Where we want to focus this podcast is on the important work of self-assessment.

And unless we're doing that consistently,

I think that's where we want to start the understanding.

If we're not constantly assessing ourselves,

Then we're never going to become the person we're meant to become.

I just want to pause right there because when people think about assessment,

They might think was I most effective in my role in my job or was I if I change this,

Will I make more money in the year to come or not?

I think the assessment we're talking about is really that kind of continuous feedback that we give ourselves.

You know,

You spoke to this person that way or you looked at that person this way or you even judged yourself harshly in this way today and what will that make of you as a human being?

Because I think that people do check in with themselves,

But I think they're very specific about- By the way,

I'm not sure that's 100% true,

But I'm sure some people do.

I think it's in the box that's really important to them.

And usually it's one,

Right?

It might be money,

It might be power,

It might be a relationship,

But I think what we're talking about is that you look at your whole being and you assess who you are today and who you want to become to ultimately live the life that you were destined,

Which is a whole different conversation.

And I would frame it even more different than that,

Which is each one of us came into this world to become something very different than the person that we came into this world as.

That's really the entire purpose of life.

Many things that happen,

We work,

We get married,

We have families,

All of that are actually elements that are meant to lead to the main goal.

And the main goal is how do I really manifest the great potential and light of my soul in this world?

And the only way that that happens is if I am consistently changing.

And I want to speak about that a little bit more,

But the two ideas,

Which I think are very important.

As I was thinking about this in preparing for this podcast,

The thought that came is that if you're not strongly driven to internally assess yourself and grow and change and find the parts of you that need to change and find the parts of you that need to grow,

It is either because you don't know where you are or you don't know where you need to be going.

But if we have clarity about both who I am today and some sense,

You can have clarity about where you need to go,

But the person we need to become is significantly different.

And that's not a bad thing.

That's a great thing.

That's actually why we're here.

But any lack of a self-assessment and true drive,

And because I think it's important that we not think of what we're talking about in,

Okay,

I want to become a better person.

I want to change this.

Those are all nice thoughts.

But what we're talking about is something much more drastic than that.

But the caveat here is that,

Yes,

And of course I agree with you,

But I want to just take us back to where most people live.

And they live in the realm of my dreams,

My destiny,

My desired outcome is so far out there and I'm going to work really hard every day to eventually get there.

And in the process,

They judge themselves so completely that they almost paralyze and immobilize themselves.

That is the reality most people live in.

I'll accept that.

And that is obviously not what we're talking about,

But that does not- But we need to address how you get past that critical harmful judgment and make it an experience that actually only you can give to yourself.

Only you can give yourself honest self-awareness because you live within your body.

You or your best friend or somebody you truly trust.

You're beautiful because most people have very complicated relationships with their spouse's best friends and parents.

I'm a true friend,

Somebody you truly trust.

Or a teacher or a guide.

Because that can be fleeting.

Again,

So very important point you raise,

Which is there is the danger,

Which a lot of people fall to,

That in the process of self-assessment,

It leads to self-judgment.

So what I- Yes.

And I really,

We have to unpack that.

Of course.

And I think the answer to that,

The right way to understand that issue is by a teacher from the great capital of the Baal Shemptom and he said something very simple.

Any thought that you have,

Any self-assessment that you're doing,

There's one clear way to know whether it's coming from a good place or a bad place,

From the right place or the wrong place.

Very simple.

Does it propel you to do or does it cause you to refrain?

Does it cause you to stop?

Does it depress you or does it excite you?

So to be very clear,

What we're talking about is the self-assessment that leads towards excitement for growth as opposed to self-judgment that leads to being hard on ourselves,

Sadness,

Depression,

All of those hinders us from action.

And this is true- I'm really going to challenge you because if a person doesn't believe in their ability to grow,

Then how can they be excited for growth?

So for instance,

A child who's growing,

They're like,

Wow,

I'm a step higher on the chart,

I'm growing each year.

Then you have a child who has growth issues and then it's a source of stress because they know that they're not going to meet that mark.

So we have an array of people and where they're at in life and where they are in their development.

And really more importantly is the consciousness.

So I just want to like,

How does a person get to that place where they get out of their own way and they're not harmful to themselves and they can really believe in the possibility that change is here and now and that judgment should transform into feedback?

Right.

And most importantly,

And I would go back to what I said before,

Which is the simple way to know whether we are self-assessing in the best way is whether after going through that process,

Does it propel me forward?

Does it inspire me?

Does it excite me?

As opposed to,

Does it make me sad or upset or shut down?

So that should be very clear.

If a person finds that whatever way they're going through this self-assessment leads them to be down on themselves,

Leads them to not be excited for growth and change,

Then that's not what we're talking about.

But I do think that for most people,

There needs to be a new way of thinking about this,

Which is,

And this is something we've spoken about a number of times in the podcast,

But I think it's worth,

I try to remind myself of this every single day.

I'm sure our listeners need to hear this as well.

None of us are even close to being the person that we're meant to be.

And that's not a negative thing.

I look at my own life and I'd like to assess that I've done a lot of very positive things.

I have influenced many,

Many people in a very positive way.

I am proud of many of my accomplishments,

But I still know.

I still know with certainty and clarity that the person that I came to this world to be is far greater than the person that I am today.

And that doesn't depress me,

Then that doesn't make me sad.

It makes me excited.

And it gives me the desire to continue to assess and continue to grow and to continue to change.

While it is very important to not fall to that first category of self-judgment that paralyzes and brings us down,

I think one of the reasons our world is not where it should be is because not enough of us are doing the other type of self-assessment that begins with one truth.

My potential is so powerful.

Who I am meant to become,

The person that I came to this world to be,

Is so much greater than who I am today.

That is not a negative thought.

That is an extremely powerful,

Positive,

Inspiring thought.

But I think- But then you cannot take your emotions seriously in that moment.

By the way,

Last minute,

30 seconds.

Unless it's inspiring,

Yeah.

No,

But so- Emotions that pull you.

But I want to underline this point because,

No,

No,

No,

I can speak to myself and I certainly I believe I can speak to many of our listeners not doing that part enough.

Being as,

I'll quote myself,

If we are not inspired every single day to change and grow in great ways or in significant ways,

It is simply because we are either not aware of where we are or not aware of where we need to go.

And that's what I hope our listeners receive from this podcast today.

The acceptance of the truth that I,

You,

Our listeners,

Are meant to do,

Accomplish,

Bring into this world so much more.

Even those of us who have accomplished a lot and even those of us who have done a lot and even those of us who have had a great positive influence on others and ourselves and our lives.

The goal is so much farther.

My potential is so much greater.

But the only way to get there,

The only way to get there is through this,

What's called Hizbon Nefesh or assessment of our soul.

It's interesting.

I think that most people don't have an idea really of that possibility of their future.

Like if I look at a child,

Right?

We have an eight year old and when she's frustrated about something or disappointed and she,

Of course she doesn't know what judgment is,

But for the sake of this conversation,

Let's say she's judging how things will turn out.

What will be the outcome of any situation?

And my answer to her is,

You're young.

There's a lot that you haven't seen yet.

There's friends you're going to meet.

There's situations you're going to be in.

She trusts that because she recognizes that she's young and she has yet to discover.

We lose that as we get older.

We think we become jaded a bit.

We know everything that we've seen enough death or sickness or pain or hardship,

Failure,

Rejection to be like,

You know,

Maybe this is just my law in life.

Maybe I'm never really going to be better or things will not get better or I won't feel better and we take that seriously.

And again,

It goes back to the emotion and it's really,

It's such a sad reality.

It's actually such a sad thought as I say it out loud because I would say it's terrifying.

That thought terrifies me.

But that is,

That is the reality in which we live.

And when I look at,

And that's why I love children,

You know,

I'm really drawn.

Let's have more.

Because it's that energy and that's,

You know,

I'm an open book.

If you want me to be quiet,

We probably shouldn't do public conversations,

But it's that idea that in the eyes of a child,

Anything is possible always.

Right.

And that's why,

And that is the truth,

Right?

But again,

We get jaded as we get older because we've just,

We've tasted too many things and whether we dealt with them,

I guess,

Well or not,

Will actually dictate how we then proceed in life unless you're listening to this podcast.

And then you work really hard to actually change that consciousness.

It's interesting.

And,

You know,

And depending on the age of our podcast listeners,

I am now 48 and I'd like to say,

Which is a phrase,

You know,

Knock on wood,

I guess,

Is other phrases people use.

I am.

You sound so old.

My birthday is tomorrow.

I sound old.

Well,

I'm sure some of our listeners are probably 78 years old.

So I sound,

I'm sure I'm very young.

I am very young,

But my point is I am more excited about what I am yet to become than anything.

And again,

Like I said,

I think I have a very healthy sense of positive accomplishments,

But I am much more excited about what I am yet to be.

Because you have a healthy understanding of what life is meant to be.

And I hope that when I'm 60 and 70 and 80 and 100,

I still have this.

Yes,

But that is the point of this conversation.

How do you maintain a mindset and hold onto that consciousness,

That reality so that you are not jaded,

That you are not the sum of all of your bad experiences,

Right?

And even though,

And then we have these moments of like,

Oh,

You know,

That was a great night out of many nights.

That's not where we want to live,

Right?

That is the point of this conversation.

Well,

I would strongly recommend listening to the Spiritually 100 Group podcast over and over and over again,

But especially this one.

You know,

There's a teaching that speaks about,

Those of you who know the biblical story,

The biblical story is that Adam was created and it says that he was created alone.

The word in Hebrew,

The ancient word is Yechidi.

And the Kabbalists,

2000 years ago,

They asked the question,

Why is that story written in that way,

That man was created alone?

And it says that it is for the purpose of understanding that the entire world is worth being created for just one person,

Which means that this entire world and all the history of humanity.

In my dark mind,

I'm like,

Because we go out alone.

What?

What?

Is that song?

Because the end,

I know the end of the line.

You want to sing?

I know you like singing on the podcast.

No,

I bet when I can't.

Come into this world alone.

I've never heard that in a long time.

What is that?

I think it's called Trample by.

.

.

And then Turtles.

And then the end,

It's you and me.

Is that what it is?

No,

It's just me probably.

If I'm all alone.

But the point,

The message of that one,

Yes,

That's the sad part of it.

Yes,

That we leave this world alone.

But the point is again,

That.

.

.

We don't really,

But that's a different podcast.

Okay,

Go ahead.

So Adam,

He came in.

While created alone to teach us that the entire creation,

Which means all of human history and preceding human history,

All the millions of years of the existence of this world up until this point and the trillions and trillions of souls who've been in this world,

It would all be worth it just for me.

There's a phrase again,

And it's both inspiring,

But also crazy if you think about it.

The phrase is,

Kol haolam li vra bishvili.

Everything has been created just for me.

And if you accept that,

And again,

It's a very difficult concept to accept.

It also begins at least to give us a sense of what we are.

Can you imagine that every.

.

.

The power of what we.

.

.

Of our potential.

Yeah.

Of what we're meant to be.

That we were created,

That man,

Meaning each one of us,

The whole of history is worthwhile just for me.

The whole of history is worthwhile if only just for what I will become.

I got onto this kind of thinking like five or six years ago when a lot of people fear success as much as they want it,

Right?

And then I had all these thoughts of like the imposter syndrome and fraud.

And then I was like,

You know what?

The world was created for me.

Whatever that's meant to be,

Right?

My potential,

It took off all the pressure of where I felt and if I felt inadequate or was it,

And the fear and everything else.

It was just like,

You know what?

Whatever will be,

I'm buying into the potential of it.

Whatever I'm worried about today,

I have no idea what the power of my soul can be.

And it actually gave me great solace.

It took me out of being stuck in the moment and being reactive and judgmental about this happened and then that didn't happen.

This was the result of my actions and this was not.

It took me out of that completely and put me in a place of I'm not taking this moment seriously.

I'm not taking this emotion seriously.

I'm not taking this fear seriously.

And I'm just going to keep going to try to discover the potential of who I am meant to become.

Right.

And the way that it came back to where we began is that if you accept that to some degree,

And I believe none of us can completely comprehend that because it's such a big idea.

But it took the pressure off of me feeling like I had to perform in this moment.

Oh,

Right.

Right.

Because I bought into something so much bigger than that.

But it should give us greater impetus to say,

Well,

If all of human history is worthwhile just for me,

Well,

It's probably not the me that I am today.

Even though I'm a pretty good me,

It must mean that where I need to go is so much further,

Which means that that can only be accomplished by this introspection.

Okay.

If I'm meant to be this unbelievable being,

What are the parts that need to change?

Because if I'm just meant to be a good person,

Some things can change the way they can stay the way they are.

No rush to change this or to change that.

But if I really accept that I am this awesome worthwhile being,

That the whole world has been created just for me,

Wow,

I must have the potential to become so much different.

And that leads us back to the internal introspection and the assessment of our soul.

What are the things?

And therefore,

I think very practically what it means,

Again,

You can't have one without the other.

Unless you are finding things that need to change and acting upon them,

Then forget about everything we've said before.

There's no way,

There's no way I'm becoming the person that the whole of human history is worth being for just that me.

By the way,

When you wake up in the morning,

You feel like you're grumpy,

You've had a bad day.

Look back to the day before,

Constantly give yourself this feedback.

There's a kabbalistic perspective on self inventory.

And all great kabbalists have taken this process very seriously.

It's everything,

Right?

I know why you're laughing.

You know exactly why I'm laughing.

And we'll find out in a few weeks if anybody else knows.

So,

Kabbalists have been known to take part in serious deep self-reflection on a consistent basis.

I would say that is kind of like,

I do a lot of different podcasts with different people and they always ask,

What is kabbalah?

In essence,

It's a verb,

Right?

It's all about change,

It's all about action.

It's this constant,

It's not just wisdom.

It has to be applied repeatedly over and over again.

It's the willpower to overpower the divine nature of our being,

Our souls.

And this reflection is a form of accountability.

So it's a two-part process.

One is keeping careful accounting of where in the day one's fallen in the ego-based thoughts,

Beliefs and desires and actions,

Right?

That's one realm to be in.

And then awaken.

.

.

So,

I'll go through that so quickly.

Okay.

Explain what that means.

I will.

And the other is awakening true remorse,

Right?

So it's to be able to look at your day,

Your life and say,

Okay,

I did X,

Y,

And Z.

That was rooted in selfishness,

Ego,

Desire,

Received the self alone.

Or I would add,

Or hurting somebody else.

Well,

All of that's included in that,

Right?

Because when the ego is involved,

Then you'll do anything to protect it.

I would actually ask our listeners in this moment to stop for a moment and think about their day wherever.

If you're listening to it in the mornings,

Think about your previous day.

If you think about it at the end of the day,

If you're listening to it at the end of the day,

Think about your day and how many moments,

And I'll ask you to do it and I'll do it as well right now.

How many moments can you point to or actions or thoughts or words that in retrospect,

In inspection are not a manifestation of who you meant to become?

So take a minute.

I'll take a minute.

How many in this day too?

In this day.

It's been a great day.

But for our listeners too,

For you and for me,

How many can you just give me a number and I'm not asking you to show.

Today?

Today wasn't a great day.

Today I would say 10.

I can think of three or four today.

By the way,

I just want to give our listeners the moment to think about it because it is so important because again,

I think in order to start making this a practice,

Which I hope that does happen for ourselves and for our listeners,

You have to at least begin to sense what it feels like.

And by the way,

You want to know what woke me up because it probably would have been 20 or 30.

Was it me?

The spider.

Oh really?

Yeah.

When I was like,

The spider's about to attack.

It was to get out of your- By the way,

For all of our listeners,

It was a very fearsome,

Scary spider.

Okay.

You didn't see it from your.

.

.

You wear glasses and whatnot.

This spider had spots on it.

My point is that- Terrified.

No,

But it really woke me up and then the pain of my ankle and I was like,

Oh my God,

Get out of your funk and then I was able to turn around enough to record this podcast.

But I understood it right away and I was actually appreciative for that.

So the other part is once you recognize this is then to awaken true remorse.

So there's a concept called Heshbon Hanefesh,

Which is taking a personal accounting for your day.

Right?

And we do this a lot leading up to the new year.

That's the first thing.

It's written in Hebrew,

But you can't say it.

That's the first note that I made for myself today.

Yes,

And I didn't see your notes and I beat you to it because I said it first.

And it's an important idea generally,

But also especially in this month of Virgo when we're leading up to Rosh Hashanah and the new year.

And it's something really that I feel fortunate enough to have learned over 24 years ago,

30 years ago actually,

To be able to actually apply this each and every day.

It's everything because if you don't,

You just kind of float through life.

And then when things get really difficult,

You start to drown because you don't have any of these tools.

And that's very important.

If you don't mind,

I know you have more of your list,

But two things you said,

Which I think are really important to underscore.

One that this is a special time of year.

Many of our listeners might not know this,

But Kabbalistically,

This is the time of year that we had the most universal assistance to both introspect and change.

So while everything we're speaking about,

I believe is important,

By the way,

Our future listeners,

Whenever you listen to this podcast,

This is an important part of life,

Hopefully always.

But these months of what's called the months of Virgo and they're in Kabbalistic term Elul is the time that not only is most focused on introspection and transformation and correction,

But it's seen that there is a divine assistance for this process,

Which is very exciting.

That if our listeners take the time to do this now,

You will be most fruitful in changing,

Transforming and seeing than any other time of the year.

And the second thing you said,

Which I think is so important,

So important because our listeners,

You know,

Some person can say,

Oh,

Well,

You know,

That's for spiritual people,

You know,

Looking inside,

Introspecting,

Correcting,

Finding where I fell,

Finding where I behaved with my ego and selfishness hurt people.

That's for spiritual people.

I'm not a very spiritual person or it's not that important to me.

But we've seen so many people that unless you do this in a consistent basis,

You're going to come to a point in your life where you're drowning.

And I don't mean physically drowning.

I mean overwhelmed.

You're in negative thoughts and judgment.

And with no way out.

And with no way out.

That's the saddest part of people that unfortunately we sometimes come in contact with.

That's my greatest pain of the people we work with.

Honestly,

With the work we do,

My greatest pain in this is that.

That they're so,

So drowning in this negativity that they never took the time to clean and think about and transform.

But also I can see the opening.

I can see the gateway,

Right?

Like you could be on the other side of your chaos and pain if you could just change this thought.

But by the way.

And the understanding.

But when you're 80,

It's much more difficult to do.

I know.

It's just hard to say.

And when you're 20,

30,

40,

50.

But again,

Regardless of what age our listeners are,

Because you can be very inspired even when you're 80 to do the transformation.

But I often say that spirituality is for spiritual people,

But I often say that for relationships,

I don't think that it'll be for the most part.

Relationships can become as powerful,

As amazing as they are meant to be without consistent spiritual work.

Not one piece of life can be.

But this part,

What we're saying,

What you said,

Which I think is so important,

To either scare inspire whatever the word is for our listeners.

We're not talking about a nice spiritual thing to do.

Unless you're consistently doing this,

It's not just that you're not going to be a better person or spiritual person.

You will find yourself in a place of drowning by negative thoughts,

By circumstance,

That at a certain point you can't find your way out from.

And that's why this is so important.

Not just as we said earlier,

Because this is the only way to become the greatest version of yourself,

But because unless you are consistently doing this process of introspection and change and cleansing of negative behavior,

Negative thoughts,

We've seen it too many times.

By the way,

There's something called toxic positivity,

Which is when you're constantly like,

Yeah,

This is fine,

So good.

And you're denying what you're really feeling.

You're denying your emotions,

You're denying the reality,

Which eventually leads to this drowning we're talking about,

Toxic positivity,

Where you're always chipper,

But it's not really coming from a true place.

This is a dead end.

I mean,

I couldn't even believe when I discovered there's a term for this.

Most of us,

To some degree,

Have an element,

Some of us more,

Some of us less,

Of that toxic positivity.

I think I'm just like,

This is not such a great day.

By the way,

Honestly,

And I get this feedback a lot from people,

Like,

Well,

You put it all out there.

Because I know that if I,

And by the way,

The first part of my life I was all about that.

Like,

Everything's fine,

And put on a happy face and make it,

You know.

And then I was just like,

No,

I'm suffering,

And I'm not gonna stick with that emotion my whole life.

So now I talk about everything,

You know.

And some people understand it,

Some don't,

Some judge or not.

But I think either way,

Whether you judge me or not,

I do think it's helpful because it gives people permission to- And inspire.

Admit their garbage and where they're at.

There's another Kabbalist I want to quote.

It's Moshe Chaim Luzzatto.

And it's one of my favorite books,

Which I don't have,

Just my commitment for this year is to be able to find more time to read the books that really inspire me.

But it's Path of the Righteous.

And he discusses virtues of the righteous,

Which is a word also,

You know,

That can be misunderstood.

It's interesting because it's translated in that way,

But actually the exact translation would be the path of the- Just the truth.

Yeah.

Those who are straight.

Yeah,

I like that better.

I don't like the word righteous.

It usually doesn't sit right with me.

But basically it's individuals who transform the desire to receive the self alone and to desire to receive the sake of sharing,

Which is basically in essence your potential self.

The first virtue he speaks about is vigilance,

Which does involve some aspect of judgment.

It involves examining one's intentions before acting,

Deciphering between good and bad.

What's good for my soul?

What is bad for my soul?

Probing,

Looking into even one's seemingly good actions to determine a hidden agenda.

Because the ego is sneaky.

And that's where people get stuck a lot.

Like I'm a good person.

I'm a sharing person.

I'm a charitable person,

But really what's really going on here?

And setting aside daily time for reflection,

It has to be consistent to match the strength of the ego.

And I think that's really key because our ego is so powerful.

And that's why when we talk about spiritual work,

It has to be constant and tremendous effort because the ego is so powerful.

How else will you match it?

How else will you meet it?

That's very important.

That's very important.

And if you brought up again,

Also one of my favorite Kabbalists,

Another great Kabbalist wrote a book.

And I think this,

Again,

It's a big idea,

But I find it very inspiring and I hope our listeners do as well.

So when we talk about the person we're meant to become,

There's a word that's used for that.

And that is a huge word,

But I think it's in the context of everything we've spoken about,

We'll give our listeners a sense of where they're meant to be going.

I can't even guess what it is.

What's this huge word?

Creator.

Right?

So the force that created this world,

All the energy from the beginning of time till today that has sustained and come into this world,

We are meant to become like that force.

So who am I meant to be?

I'm meant to be like the Creator.

Some of you might or might not know,

A number of years ago I wrote a book called Becoming Like God.

Very good book.

Go buy it.

Where can we get it?

Amazon,

Claw.

Com.

But that's the context.

That's the framework within which our lives should be assessed.

I need to become like the Creator.

And he actually has a beautiful book that goes through the different aspects of the Creator and how we are meant to mirror them.

But before,

Maybe I'll touch upon one or two of them,

But before we go any further,

That's,

And I wonder how many of us really have that as our goal.

I'm not meant to be a good person,

A better person.

I'm meant to be like the Creator.

Can you imagine how much goodness there is in that force that is called the Creator?

All the love that has ever existed,

All the blessings that have ever existed,

All the goodness that has ever existed.

Most people are just trying to have a little less chaos in their lives from year to year.

Right.

But by the way,

That's a problem.

I know.

That's why I'm going to keep bringing that up.

If we focus our lives simply on- On lack,

By the way.

Just keeping our head above water or just getting a little bit better.

By the way,

At times,

That's all we can do,

But there better be parts of our time,

Of our lives,

Of our days,

Of our weeks,

Of our months,

Of our years that are focused on the true end goal.

Or that ancient,

I'm not sure if it's Chinese,

But it's called as a Chinese proverb.

If you don't know where you're going,

You're never going to get there.

So yes,

It's true.

There are times we're overwhelmed.

There are times we can't even be thinking about this,

But there can be no times that we think about this.

If we understand that why did my soul come into this world?

My soul came into this world to be like the creator,

To be like that force that created this world.

Endless goodness,

Endless blessings.

Joy.

Endless joy.

It is,

Again,

It is truly beyond our comprehension,

But at least it gives us a sense of where we're going towards.

And therefore,

Everything we're talking about,

So I'll use an example.

One of the attributes of the creator are something called noussé avons in the phrase,

Which means that he carries other people's darkness,

Negativity,

Which means that even if often we behave in ways that are not right,

Just,

Straight,

The light of the creator continues to sustain us.

In our practice,

So he uses the example,

How we're meant to be like the creator in this sense that even when people do negative actions towards us,

Still,

If you want to be like the creator,

Even through that,

You act with kindness towards them.

Again,

This is not always easy.

How do you carry their garbage though?

You handle it,

Which means most of us,

Again- Which means you dump it.

No.

If somebody came over to you and slapped you in the face- Oh,

You love this.

I don't know what happened to you when I was asleep.

And the next minute they ask you,

Can you lend me $100?

The answer would be absolutely not.

Well,

The light of the creator doesn't behave like that.

The light of the creator even after- But that's not carrying their garbage.

No,

No,

No.

Savon handles it,

Meaning he does not give retribution immediately to the individual that behaves negatively.

You mean he filters it.

He doesn't punish with it.

He doesn't react to it.

He sustains it.

He transforms it.

Well,

He doesn't transform it.

That's the individual's job.

No,

But he- But he accepts it and yet continues to give.

But my point,

I don't want to get stuck on that one idea,

But the point is that,

Because it's a beautiful book that goes through every aspect- No,

Because it becomes like a fire that doesn't burn you,

But actually warms you.

Right?

Is that what you're saying?

Because the view is this,

Who am I meant to be?

I am meant to be like the creator.

Like the creator.

I'm not meant to be a better version of myself,

A good person,

A spiritual,

Whatever those phrases.

Who I am meant to be is so,

It's everything.

I'm meant to be everything in kindness and goodness and blessings and in forbearance,

All of that.

My point simply is that when we talk about the Khishbo-Nefesh or the internal assessment,

Unless we have some sense and we can't have a clarity about where we're going to be because we're not there yet,

But some sense of who we're meant to be coming in that phrase,

By becoming like the creator today.

I can tell you one thing for certain,

And I think it's really apropos.

It's not a coincidence that we're recording today.

It's a really long day.

It's been a really long summer for me.

It's really long here.

But the thing is this,

If I had taken myself seriously today,

The way that I woke up in the morning,

I certainly wouldn't be sitting here enjoying myself,

Inspired.

I didn't take that seriously.

I knew it was a process.

I didn't know how long it was going to last.

I knew that I could influence the length of it,

But it didn't define me and I didn't punish myself like,

Oh,

It's because you did this and that the day before.

I was just like,

Okay,

There's something here.

I'm not going to take it too seriously.

What do I want this day to be?

What do I want the week to be?

Where am I going day to day?

It really,

Because I didn't take the dark feeling seriously,

I was really able to go where I was supposed to.

That's just a day.

But if we take this formula and we use this example of my day today and we use that for life,

Then you will never hit a dead end.

There will be no limitation because you don't take anything,

Not the good,

Not the bad,

Nothing is serious.

It's just a process as long as you're clear about where it is you're headed.

Exactly.

I think that's really powerful.

No,

I feel it fully because you saw me earlier.

I did not notice.

No,

I think it's really powerful,

Really,

Really powerful.

It's everything.

Nice.

Should we get to a letter?

Yes.

Why do I never see the letters?

I just never check that account.

I see.

That's what I love about us,

By the way.

It's great that you have a schedule,

You have a plan,

And you follow through with that.

I try.

I try my best.

So interestingly,

This is a letter actually written in Spanish from one of our listeners in Argentina.

Some of our listeners might not know that our podcast- You translated it.

That's probably why I never saw it.

Well,

This is translated.

So this is a translated letter from the original Spanish.

Our podcast is translated into Spanish,

Portuguese,

Hebrew,

Maybe a few other languages I don't recall right now.

So if you do have friends,

By the way,

Who don't speak or understand English on YouTube,

It's available in Spanish,

Portuguese,

Hebrew,

And of course,

English as well.

Is it available in Russian?

Not yet.

I don't think so.

Farsi.

Farsi.

I hope so.

Actually,

We should record a whole episode of Farsi.

I will be speaking the whole time.

Exactly.

And I'll be listening.

You'll say three words.

Arey.

Arey.

What do you know another one?

How do you say I love you?

Tell me.

How do you say I love you?

A sharetan.

Exactly.

A sharetan.

Dear Monica and Michael.

I'm fascinated with the podcast and waiting every week for the translation of each video on YouTube.

I started to read more about Kabbalah since this pandemic.

I had to be alone all the time and it helped me to cope.

I want to thank you for your self-sabotage podcast.

Since my forties,

I've realized that every time I want to start my ventures,

I self-sabotage.

I become negative.

I still have not found the tools to overcome it,

But for now I started to change with affirmations and to become more positive.

For me,

It is very easy to help others and solve their problems,

But I am not achieving my dreams.

I think it comes from starting to accept that I deserve to achieve my goals and my dreams.

I will continue to find more tools in your podcast.

I love you so much.

Greetings.

Andrea from Chacao,

Argentina.

Thank you,

Andrea.

And now our listeners know that they not only can share their stories,

Questions,

Inspirations with us in English,

Which please continue to do,

Send us all of your questions,

Stories,

Comments,

Inspirations to Monica and Michael at kabbalah.

Com.

But also if you or your friends or family speak Spanish,

Portuguese,

Hebrew,

Send them to YouTube.

You can also send us their stories,

Comments,

Questions to Monica and Michael at kabbalah.

Com and they will be translated for us and we'll be able to share them.

Go to Apple podcast,

Write five star reviews,

Write your reviews and share this podcast with as many people as you can because we record this to hopefully bring some inspiration into your lives,

Into the lives of those who we haven't yet reached through your work by sharing this podcast.

Questions,

Comments,

Inspiration,

Stories to Monica and Michael at kabbalah.

Com.

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As always,

We hope you enjoyed listening to this podcast as much as we enjoyed recording.

You are the yin to my yang.

I could never.

Ah,

Shit it's all of them.

Bye.