What It Means To Live Your Desires

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46:13

What It Means To Live Your Desires

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The secret to happiness? Learning what you truly desire. But often we don't know what our desires are and how to actually "live them". Join Alara Sage for a deep conversation on this topic. A lesson in liberation.

Meet your Teacher

Denver, CO, USA

Meet your Teacher

Denver, CO, USA

Transcript

Okay, So welcome. I'm Melira Sage and today we're going to talk about what it means to truly live your desires. Another way to say it is to truly live your passion, Your purpose because they all go hand in hand. Hi, Michelle. Oh, Wonderful. Welcome, Sweetheart. Have you ever thought of that? Have you ever thought how your desires, Your passion and your purpose all works together? I've been speaking to people quite a lot about such topics. And one of the things I've come to realize is that the vast majority of people don't even know what they desire in life, Truly desire. Like, Yes, Of course, We all want financial stability and joy, Happiness, But really what they desire for themselves in this life, Their vision for this life. Most people just simply don't know. Often, Also when I ask people what lights them up, I find that quite frequently people don't have the answer to that question, Which is okay. That's part of what we're here to talk about today because I want to deepen the conversation on this topic. So you guys understand more clearly and also just from a different perspective, You know, We can say the same thing just from that slightly different perspective that can help you have that aha moment. Have you guys ever seen the, I think it's called the Yes Man, Maybe it's just yes. It's a movie with Jim Carrey. It's a delightful movie. He goes to this seminar where the guy is just like, Say yes. And the guy is, You know, Like he drills it into the audience's head and just say yes, Say yes. And it feels very cult-like. Is kind of like that. You're kind of like, Whoa, That's intense, You know? But then Jim Carrey actually goes and does this and he just starts saying yes to everything and his life transforms massively. Now, While I don't necessarily think we need to go to that extreme to say yes to everything, There is a really clear teaching in that movie. And that teaching is really about how we commonly say no. Not that we necessarily need to say yes to everything, But how often do we say no? How often do we not really allow ourselves a particular pleasure, A particular experience, Particular enjoyment, Just a situation that we feel we want in that moment. And I'm talking little stuff, Guys. I'm talking, You know, Maybe a friend says, Hey, You know, Let's go get something to eat. And she's with her other friend that you just don't really jive with. Right. And so, You know, We have this sense that, Well, I should say yes. Right. She's a dear friend. She really wants me to come along. I should say yes. Right. But sometimes the desire in ourself is to say no. Sometimes the desire in ourself is to say, I really don't feel like going and hanging out with them. My point being is that we have a life of obligation. In our society, There is a strong suppression of really what we desire. And that suppressive energy is rooted in obligation. I don't mean responsibility because responsibility has a slightly different energy to it. We are all responsible for our own being. We are responsible for our own energy. We are responsible for our ability to respond in the moment. But obligation is created through guilt and shame. This is a really big energy right now in this very moment. Because if you think about our society about, You know, Religion, Which actually I'm not against religion, It's more like the dogma of any religion, Including spirituality, Right? Dogmatic teachings, Dogmatic practices. Okay. Anything dogmatic has a sense of obligation to it. Like you should, Or you have to do this. If you think just about our general society and how we grow up and just even in school, How we are asked to fit into a box and our, You know, Politically correctness, Which honestly drives me crazy. And our, You know, False, False portraying of being kind, A kind person, A good person. We have this very, Very false sense of what it means to be a good person. Like if you just say thank you and please, If you do obligatory things, You know, You send the thank you card, Whatever it is that makes you a good person. I disagree. I think a good person is really rooted in the intention of your actions. So you could have, You can be doing all the goods, Person, Stuff, And really your intention is just to be perceived as a good person, As opposed to really doing it because you care and you love and you desire to do it. You desire to do it. That's what I'm getting at with this entire conversation. The intentions behind our actions are really the example of, Are we living a life that we desire or not? Are we living our desires? Yes. As you have clarity to what your desires are, Of course, That's easier, Right? You can say, I desire this, You know, Like I really desire to assist. People. I really desire to express my message and to share it. I desire to bring transmissions in and healing for people. That's very, Very close to my heart. I desire very, Very deeply for it. But if you don't know what that is, Then this is the conversation that's going to help you get a little bit closer to what that is. And that is really in, In the actions and in the intention behind those actions, Why are you doing something? Why? Because again, Something can be perceived as mean when perhaps the person was just really trying their hardest to, You know, Honor their own boundaries and it was perceived as mean. Conversely, Something can be seen as very kind and compassionate when really the person is so scared to not be seen as good or kind or compassionate that they've really shut themselves down to what they really want. And they're just acting robotically so that they're perceived as good, Kind, Compassionate. Do you see what I'm saying here? Our actions are instilled with our intentions behind every single action is an intention. I'm always asking people why, Why did you do that? And then they give me an answer. It's like, No, Really. Why did you do that? Why feel it? Feel the reason why, When you really ask yourself why you really start getting down to the root of are you living your desires or are you living a life of obligation? Can you feel that? Even I was speaking to a client the other day and she said, You know, We'll, We'll have to, I have to have a paycheck, Right? So if your job is based off of having to have a paycheck, You know, Is that filling your desires? And I don't mean that your desire has to be, Or excuse me, Your job has to be, You know, Like there's so many different jobs, So many different avenues of expression in job and career. I've had so many different jobs, But you know what? I've enjoyed every single one of them. Every single one of them. Well, Okay. I will admit I was a, A waitress for like six months of my life and I didn't enjoy that. So that's the one job I didn't enjoy. And that was probably actually a really good experience for me because I had enjoyed everything else up until that point. And I was like, Wow, Yeah, Don't want to do that. And that's just me, Right? Not saying waitressing is bad, But people get stuck in the rut of, Well, I have to get a job and therefore like this one fits that bill. This is, This is a job. I have to get a job that fits that bill. Forget about whether I like it at all. Forget about whether I have any sense of fulfillment. Forget about whether I even feel comfortable and safe there. That's a huge one. How many people I've worked in, Worked with, You know, In certain circumstances that honestly they don't even feel really safe in their work environment. They don't feel safe to be them again. It doesn't have to be this amazing job, But do you feel safe to be you? Are you lining aligning with something that is insisting that you be somebody else? Now you want joy, You want happiness, You want alignment, You want abundance, But choosing actions that are aligned, Choosing actions that take you into a place out of alignment. Why? Because you need a paycheck, Right? And again, This is just examples, Guys. We can take it to family. Family's a huge one of obligation. I should speak to my family. I should go visit my family. I should do this family reunion thing. I should whatever, Like there's a million shoulds when it comes to family, I should love my family. I should, You know, Like want to spend time with my family. There's a million shoulds with family, But what do you really want when it comes to your family and not the big picture? Cause we all want connection. We all want to feel loved and seen by our family, But is that what's happening right now? Are you placing yourself going to see them, Trying to appease them so that they'll see you so that they'll acknowledge you because that's what you want from them so badly. And so you keep placing yourself into a circumstance, Taking an action that is against your desires. Do you understand that? That's a little bit vague. So let me, Let me go into that a little bit deeper. Okay. The example is you want to be seen and loved by your family. You could also insert friends here, Insert. You want to be seen and loved by your friends. That's your desire. And so when your friends or family says, Hey, Let's go do this, Or let's, Let's, You know, Let's do this. Let's have a gathering or let's go do this activity or let's go do that activity. And you don't really want to like, It's not comfortable for you. You don't feel safe. It's not something that truly aligns with yourself, But you want to feel seen and, And appreciated by them, Loved by them. So you take action to appease them at an obligation. That action right there goes against the very desire you're trying to create. We don't think that that's the truth. We think, Okay, This is what I desire. I desire to connect with them. I desire for them to see me. So if I go do this, They'll see me. But what, What are you doing? Right? You are stepping out of your self out of your authenticity. Nobody can really see you truly see you in an inauthentic expression. They see your inauthentic self. So then what happens is you have to maintain that inauthentic you because that's who they see. Hmm. Yeah. Right. Because we think that's what they want. We think that's what we want, But that's not really what we want. We want is this is me and I want somebody to connect and love and validate me in my authentic expression. That's truly the desire within that example. So what it means to truly live your desire is to take action always in that understanding. That obligation that shoulds have tos are guilt and shame, Guilt and shame, Heavy shame guys. Shame is the lowest vibration closest to death. Talk about low vibratory energy. Talk about low vibe shame. So when we guilt ourselves, When we shame ourselves into things, We are completely pulling the rug out from underneath ourselves. We're telling ourselves that what you want, I don't care what that is. I care more about not going against the grain. I care more about making other people comfortable about appeasing them than I care about my personal desires, My passion, My purpose, Which means my happiness, My joy, My bliss, My pleasure, My fulfillment, My abundance, All of it. Right now we're straddling. We've got the Piscean era, The old world, The old energies that we're leaving and the Aquarian era, The new world, New energies. We've got a foot on both of these, But we're starting to lean our weight over to the Aquarian, Starting to become more and more in the Aquarian energy. Our foot hasn't lifted up off this yet, But the weight is coming off of it. This old way, The Piscean era is all about doing shoulds and coulds, Shoulds and have tos. It's about martyrism, Being a martyr. It's about sacrificing your desires, Your heart, Your self-love, Your self integrity for a perceived benefit, Which is all illusionary, But that's okay for the good of all. Right? So what has been created is a bunch of people that are so far from their authentic self, So far from their truth. There's no aliveness. There's very little love. There's very little passion, Little to no pleasure and enjoyment truly within the body. It's all external. All of that, That deadness, That zombie energy is from that martyrism, Is from that guilting and shaming ourselves into doing things that just don't really resonate with us, With ourself, With our sovereign being. The new world is all about liberation of the self into freedom, Freedom to express, Freedom to own who you are, Freedom to be who you are, Freedom to choose what you want to do, Freedom, Why, True freedom, Illusionary freedom, True freedom. It's extraordinary, But it's not easy. And if you're listening to this, I guarantee you, You are riding the crest of the wave into the Aquarian era. You're a trailblazer. You my dear are a trailblazer. And you know what trailblazers have to do? They have to have a machete. Trailblazers have to have a machete and they have to slash and whack their way through. They have to create the path. There is no path. There is no trail. We have to create it. And there's all this resistance of, You know, Jungle. And by no means do I, Am I saying that we have to fight and like, Ah, Right. But what I'm saying is that there is effort. That's not easy, But I guarantee you the lion's heart, The courage of the heart is absolutely 100% seen, Recognized by the universe. When you continue to move with that courage of the heart, Your life reflects that. It reflects that alignment to your sovereign being. So again, What does it truly mean to live your desires? It's usually pretty challenging. It means seeing where you feel guilted into things where you feel guilt. If you don't do something really getting to the bottom of that guilt, Why do you feel that guilt? Really it's a program, A program in your body, In your mind, In your subconscious mind. One of my clients, I was speaking to today, You know, She was saying how she's doing all this work on herself and she feels guilty. And when I said, You know, Why, What, What is the guilt there? And it came down to selfishness, Right? That somehow if I'm loving and taking care of myself, I'm being selfish. So again, That's the martyr, Right? That means that I have to go out and help everybody else and forget about myself because they need me. I've got to go save the world, Right? Even if that means at the, At the expense of my own self, I will do that. I will sacrifice myself. And she wasn't doing that. Right. But that's the martyr energy. Not saying that was her or even I had a conversation with my mother a couple of years ago and I can, I don't remember what it was, But she was upset at me at some choice I was making. And I said to her, I hear you, However, This is my life. And she's, You know, She basically said to me, But I had to sacrifice myself for you kids. And I was like, And that was your choice. Doesn't mean that I have to, You know, I am 40. My parents and the generation of their parents, Like the baby boomers and the generation before them, The vast majority of them, It was very much like that. You know, We sacrifice ourselves for our children, For our family, For all this bullshit. And the interesting thing is how, Again, How unfulfilled those generations are. So the question is, Do we want to continue to create a society that is sacrificing themselves? Or do we want to create something completely different where the love of self starts first and then yes, You can help others. You can most definitely help others. Now that your cup is overfloweth, You actually can help others and you don't help others from a place of resentment. Isn't that interesting? Because when we feel like we are doing something just for the paycheck, Doing something because we have to, Doing something because we should, Doing something because of guilt, Doing something because of shame, That creates deep seated resentment to our self most importantly. And then to others, Just whoever we want to point it at, Our kids, Our partner, Our boss, The company we work for, Big pharma, The government, We'll find someplace to point that resentment that the resentment that I feel because I feel guilty because I don't follow my desires. So I need to point that at something to very, Very true. Maybe not so easy to hear, But it's very true. So what it means, What it truly means to live a life of desires is to step against that grain, To have that machete and blaze a new trail. And it's uncomfortable because we're used to guilt and shame, Even though it's low vibratory, I'll repeat close to death, We're used to it and surprisingly comfortable in it. Even though it's painful, It's comfortable. Isn't that interesting? Now to switch around and stop saying yes to shoulds and coulds, Start saying yes to our own desires in the moment. What do you really want right here right now? That's uncomfortable. Very exciting. Can you feel it? I can. Wonderful Christine, Excellent awareness. A lot of resentments to let go of. Yes. Goodness, We heard. We all do. Everybody does. Guarantee. It's just about owning it. The denial doesn't do us any good. It's just like, Okay, Where's my resentment? Let's have a look. I'm sure it's in there somewhere. Maybe somewhere you don't really want to look, Right? I brought this exercise in the other day. What would you do if you only had, This is an exercise I've done many times with myself and with my clients. I can't remember whether I talked to you guys about this or not. If this is a repeat, It's a repeat. But it's important for this conversation right here. The exercise is what would you do? How would you live differently if you had two years to live? If you had one year to live, If you had six months to live, I've done this exercise many, Many times because it's very, Very revealing. It really shows you where you're living a life of obligation. The last part of that exercise is three months. If you only had three months to live. Now this is the interesting part. The other day when this exercise came back into my awareness, My higher self was like, I was like, Oh yeah, Yeah, This, This exercise and my higher self was like, But you never look at the three months. And I was like, No, I don't because it's always just like, Anybody would say, Oh, If I had three months to live, Like, Fuck it. Right? Everything goes out the window. It's balls to the wall. It's just simply what? What you truly, Truly want to do. What's really, Really important to you. And the interesting thing was, Is I had always used the two years of one year, The six months with my clients and with myself, I had dismissed the three months because I thought that was too exaggerated. And yet here I was seeing it in a really beautiful way. Is that not truly living in the moment? Yes. Again, There's some logistics about a job and money. But they use it as an exercise, Use it as a reflection. What would you do differently if you only had three months to live? Because the honest truth is for me, I would spend all my time with my boys and my partner. And I would still hold my container for my clients. That's my honest truth. Would I do transmissions when I do these, I'm not really sure, But I know for sure my clients, My one-on-one clients, I would most definitely continue to hold that container because I fucking love it because it's so dear to me. That kind of truth, What the reflection comes back to you for that three months, That kind of truth is the Aquarian era. Yes, We're still going to need money for a while. I don't know how long. Still going to need to work and do all of that. But again, Is there even a reflection within that? When I watched this really great thing, I love reality TV show. I know that probably sounds really funny, But I love watching all of the humanism going on and the interactions and all the different levels of, I can see so much. So I enjoy watching the different levels of conscious and unconscious energy going on and the pain and the, All the different things going on. It's really intriguing to me to watch it all happen. But there was one that's the one called glow up. It's a makeup one and I don't really watch it because I like the interaction ones. I like the relationship ones because there's so much beautiful projecting and all this stuff that goes on that I just love to watch happen. Anyways, The one called glow up, It's a makeup one. It's like a makeup competition. And this one woman, She was a, Like a preschool teacher or something like that. And she just realized she's always telling the kids, You can do anything that you want, Anything that you want, You can do in life. And then she realized she wasn't walking the talk. She realized she wanted to do makeup professionally and she quit her job and she went on this competition. That's the courage of the heart. That's the yes. And it doesn't have to look that extreme, That dramatic, You know, It's easy to use dramatic examples cause it's, It's highly polarizing. It really emphasizes it, But doesn't have to be that dramatic. You can even, You know, Even in the same job, For instance, You can switch to a company to a company that you feel more in alignment with in the same exact position, Right? You could switch to a company and to a work environment where you feel safe scene, Right? Even though it's the same position, Like it doesn't have to be this massive, Like, Screw this, I'm gonna, You know, Take this up. But again, It's like, Where are you sacrificing yourself? And I would say one of the largest ones I see is like just what I said, Where people are in a position, It's not about the position. It's about the environment, The job, The boss, The company, The other employees that they just it's gross. It's toxic. It doesn't feel good to them. So even acknowledging these kinds of circumstances that we repeatedly choose to put ourselves in why, Cause I need a paycheck. Well, Okay. Yes, I agree. You need a paycheck. I totally get that. We all need that. But is that a why to put yourself in that particular environment to sacrifice yourself? No, I disagree with that. Is that the why to do the things with the friends or insert family? That just don't resonate with you. Is it the why to not speak up, Not to be you to not express yourself. There's so many subtleties here, Guys. I want to bring it out of like the big picture and into like the real subtle energies, The real subtle actions that we take on a regular basis of shoulds and have tos the subtle things like pretending to be happy, Fake smiling. Oh, How are you? Oh yeah, I'm great. But inside you don't feel great. So why are you smiling? Right? Because that's what we do in our society. That's like the socially accepted thing to do. I noticed that when I went, You know, When I was 19, I left the country and I traveled and I became a scuba diving instructor and I was gone for years. It was extraordinary. It was something that just happened to me. And you know, In Asia, They don't do that shit. You walk into a store and they look at you and if they feel like smiling at you, They'll smile at you. And if they don't feel like smiling at you, They don't smile at you. I didn't have the culture shock when I left the US. I was gone for two and a half years and then I came back to the US and I was like, Oh my gosh. And I walk into a store and the person was like, Hi, How are you? It's so nice to see that you came. And they're not even looking at me. They're like, Hi. Yeah, Thank you for coming. And I was like, Wow, That's gross. You know, We're like, Hi, How are you? And then they turn away before you even respond. How authentic is that? Like honestly, Don't ask me if you don't want to know, Just don't ask. I don't need you to ask me. Like again, These are subtle things and we may not think that they're that important, But they're absolutely what I'm speaking about here today. It's absolutely the way that we have structured ourselves to be particular ways. And if we aren't those particular ways, We are not good people. We're not nice. We're not friendly. You can't do that. You know what came to me when I, When I felt into the three month container thing, How dare you. That's so delicious. How dare you, How dare you consider living your life so free, So liberated, So true to yourself. How dare you? That's good. That was my, My mind telling me that my, My mind going, How dare you? We can't stop. Stop. Shh. Yes, Glen. And that's what I'm referring to. So Glen said I give up my job immediately, But it was, If it was longer than I'm not so sure. But again, It's not about like giving up the job or not giving up the job. Right. It's about, It's about like why it's always about why and is that why really what you want to align yourself to just, That's the answer. Is it what you really want to align yourself to? Again, It's okay to say I need a paycheck, But why that job? Why that company? Why always can come up with reasons always. So what it means to really live your life's desire is every single day understanding and just beginning to see after this conversation, I invite you guys to see, Just start to see from a place of non-judgment and even not even from a place of needing to change anything just yet. Just observe yourself, Right? The witness observer is so powerful. You know, In quantum physics, They teach as soon as there's a witness observer, The energy reacts differently. So just by observing yourself, You start to offer and invite yourself into change. Okay. So what I invite you to do is to observe yourself, Observe how often you do things that are socially appropriate or correct, You know, Politically correct. That appease other people that are obligatory, That if you didn't, You would feel guilty or shameful and just observe yourself. Okay. And to do this from a state of non-judgment, Right? Just like, Oh my gosh, Look at that. There I did it. Oh, Whoa, There it was again. Ah, That was a doozy. Like have fun with it. Because if you make this heavy, You make it heavy, But you can play any game that you want with lightness. You can play it with fun, With curiosity. If you come at it that way, Right? So again, From non-judgment, Allowing yourself just to see. And then as you observe, You will notice certain ones that you can immediately start to shift out of, Right? Just easy ones, Ones that you're like, Yeah, I definitely don't need to do that anymore. There's really no purpose to that. So that one I can totally shed, Right? And it may take some practice, Especially if it's like a social thing. These are just natural things that we do, But you can see the ones that are just like, That can go and that can go and just practice that. Practice the ones that are easy to go. Because what that starts to do is it starts to excite you. It starts to tell yourself, Whoa, I do have a say in this whole life thing. I have a say. I'm a sovereign being. I have a say. Wow. Okay. And it starts to excite that in you. And then pretty soon you build conviction of that say, You get more courageous in that say, You get to be like, Okay, Now I'm really ready to shed this one. That's a little bit harder. It's a little bit more against the grain. I'm out there with my machete, But I've shed these other ones that I really now can feel how that's just not truly my desire anymore. And then when you hit some big ones, You know, It really lights you up. It makes you feel alive and fulfilled when you do those things and you get over any guilt or shame, Wow. You know, It's like you broke down some of those walls of yourself. You know, Now you can see more. Now you can experience more. Things get brighter, More beautiful, And things even start to flow better. Why? Because you're aligned. So as a summary, Because we've had a lot of people joined since the beginning, What it truly means to live your desires is to understand, To see where you're living out of obligation, Out of a sense of guilt, A sense of shame, Social pressure, And learning to acknowledge those and learning to let those go so that you can really understand what your desires really are. Because we've lived so long in this other way that our desires are buried under all this obligation. It's pushed down. Our desires are like way down there and you're like, I don't know. I don't know what my desires are. I can't see them. It's like they're buried, Quite frankly, Under a bunch of bullshit. So it's okay if you don't know what you desire. It's okay if you don't feel passionate. That's okay. This is how you start the process. My desire is that humans feel passion again, Passion for life, Not a fear of death, A passion for life. Thank you all so much for being here.