Dissolving The Concept Of Self With Metta -5 Aggregates

So I would like you all to take up your sitting posture,

Wherever that is,

Whether it's on a chair or on the cushion,

And just get comfortable.

Okay,

So once you guys are settled in and you found your sitting posture,

I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath.

And as you exhale,

Just feel your entire body relax.

We'll do this two more times.

Inhale,

Deep inhalation,

And relax.

Now,

Just scan through your body,

Just run your attention up from the top of your head all the way down to your toes and up again.

And notice if there's any tightness or tension anywhere in the body,

And consciously soften that tension.

Let go of it,

Relax.

I want you to bring a small Buddha smile on your face,

In your eyes,

And in your heart.

And in your mind,

Think,

May I be happy.

May I be well.

May I be free of suffering.

May I be filled with loving kindness.

And think back to a time where you did something good for another person,

Or any series of memories where you were generous,

Giving,

Sharing,

Kind,

Offered support.

Any happy memory that you can think of that brings softness to your heart.

And feel into that.

Feel into the idea that I deserve to be happy.

I deserve love and kindness.

I deserve compassion.

I deserve empathy.

I deserve joy.

I deserve to be at peace.

And really feel into that.

When your mind gets distracted and it's going into the sounds around you,

It's listening to the drilling,

It's listening to the crows,

It's listening to the taxis,

And so on.

Just be aware of that.

And let that go,

And relax back,

Sink back into the feeling.

Fill your entire body up with loving kindness from the heart.

You deserve to be happy.

You deserve to be free of any kind of suffering.

I want you to bask in this feeling as if you're on a beach in paradise,

And the warm glow of the sun is gently on your face and body.

Just basking in the goodness of loving kindness for yourself.

When your mind gets pulled away,

Notice it,

And relax back into the feeling.

Your mind might be distracted by some noise or smells or feeling on the body,

But notice that.

Relax.

Come back to the feeling of loving kindness.

Let the loving kindness spread throughout the body,

From your heart upwards to your head and downwards to your toes,

Surging through from your legs up into your torso,

Through your fingers,

Up through your arms,

Up into the head.

Loving kindness everywhere.

Every muscle,

Every bone,

Every sinew,

Every cell of your body is steeped in loving kindness.

You may feel some joy coming up.

You may feel some tranquility coming up.

You may feel some equanimity coming up.

You may feel spacious,

Expansive.

But these are all just markers in the background.

Our attention is relaxed and aware of loving kindness.

All the honking,

The drumming,

The crows,

They're also in the background.

Let them be.

My awareness is relaxed.

My awareness is passive.

Anything can come in and out,

But I remain steady in loving kindness.

All the sounds,

All the smells,

Everything is encompassed in my feeling of loving kindness.

They are not separate from me.

They're okay.

It's okay to be there.

Now I feel all that loving kindness throughout my body,

Throughout my cells,

Increasing,

Glowing out from the pores of my skin,

Protecting me,

Shielding me.

Loving kindness surrounds me.

It pervades my entire body and around my body.

Loving kindness is now my aura.

It's everywhere around me.

If your mind goes elsewhere,

It's okay.

Notice that.

Relax.

Come back to that aura of loving kindness.

Whatever distractions come up,

They too deserve our loving kindness.

So now we're going to feel into that loving kindness all throughout the body,

Surrounding the body,

Outside the body,

And we're going to share it with everyone here.

Everyone in this room deserves our loving kindness.

May everyone here be happy.

May everyone here be free of suffering.

May everyone here be filled with our loving kindness.

Pervade the entire room with loving kindness in all directions.

Feel into that loving kindness,

Which is now one homogenous experience that we are all feeling into.

Now we're going to direct that feeling of loving kindness in front of us.

Keep that feeling going in front of us.

May everything and everyone in front of us be touched by this loving kindness.

Just keep it going in front of us in the forward direction.

May all things,

May all beings experience my loving kindness in front of me without end,

Without limits,

Without any boundaries.

Whoever is in front of us in this room,

Beyond this room,

Beyond the space of this building,

May all beings in this building be encompassed by that loving kindness in the forward direction.

May the crows feel our loving kindness.

May the birds feel our loving kindness.

May the workers around us feel the loving kindness in the forward direction.

And now behind us,

May whatever beings be behind us feel into our loving kindness.

May they be touched by our loving kindness.

If your mind gets distracted,

Notice it and relax back into the feeling.

Put your attention behind you.

May all beings feel the loving kindness behind us.

May all beings to our right feel our loving kindness.

May all beings in our right,

To our right,

In this building,

Beyond this building,

Throughout the city feel our loving kindness.

May all beings to the left of us feel our loving kindness.

May we direct our attention to our left with our loving kindness.

Now may all beings below us feel our loving kindness.

May the earth beneath our feet be filled with loving kindness.

May the insects in the ground feel our loving kindness.

May the worms,

May any beings living underground feel our loving kindness.

May all animals feel our loving kindness.

May beings in the sea,

Fish and reptiles,

Jellyfish,

All kinds of beings,

Coral,

Plants,

May all of them feel our loving kindness.

May the spirits that may be roaming feel our loving kindness.

The hungry ghosts,

Ghosts who are helpless,

Who have nowhere to go,

May they feel our loving kindness.

May whatever beings may be,

In whatever hell realms there may be,

Feel our loving kindness.

May all those suffering in these realms feel our loving kindness.

Now may all beings above us in the sky feel our loving kindness.

May the birds of the air,

Birds in the trees,

May the beings beyond the sky feel our loving kindness.

Whatever devas might there be,

In whatever hell,

Heaven realms there may be,

May they all feel our loving kindness.

May our loving kindness encompass the entire sky,

Out through space,

And out to these devas and nagas and other beings,

Up into the brahmalokas.

May all beings in the first,

In the second,

In the third and fourth brahmaloka feel our loving kindness.

May all beings in the formless realm feel our loving kindness.

May our loving kindness pervade the entire space,

This entire compound,

Out into the city and expand outward in all directions while we remain in the center.

A large field of loving kindness encompassing all beings in this city and beyond into the districts,

Beyond that into the state,

Beyond that throughout the entire country.

May all beings experience our loving kindness.

Let us be in an infinite space,

Without center,

Without boundaries,

Of loving kindness,

Pervading all of the continent,

Beyond borders,

Through all nations,

Throughout the world.

Throughout all parts of this planet.

May whatever beings reside on this planet and in this planet and above this planet feel our loving kindness.

Whatever distractions may come up,

Just relax it.

Come back into this infinite void of loving kindness.

Let that loving kindness pervade the entire field of space beyond this planet,

Through the entire solar system and beyond.

May all of existence in this universe and beyond begin to feel our loving kindness.

May our loving kindness know no end,

Have no end.

Let's rest in this field of infinite loving kindness,

This infinite field of compassion.

May all beings in this infinite field be free of any suffering whatsoever.

If there's any distractions,

Just let go.

It's okay if it's there.

It's okay if it's not there.

It doesn't matter.

Just bring our attention back into this infinite field.

And now we're going to gather our attention to our body.

Notice how the body has grown,

Has developed from our infancy when we are born.

How tiny our body is and how it grows and how it grows into a toddler.

And from there,

How it grows into childhood as we play around and make friends and walk and run.

And how it keeps growing into our teenage years,

Into our adolescence,

Into our adulthood.

This body has kept changing.

This body is always in flux.

This body internally is made up of so many different cells,

Organs,

States of matter that coalesce into the body.

But our body is no different than the chair that we are sitting on,

The ground beneath our feet,

The air circulating around us,

The water that we drink.

It's all form.

It keeps changing.

It's always in flux.

And one day,

This body will age.

This body will deteriorate.

The eyes,

The ears,

The nose,

The tongue,

This body,

The brain,

All of it will start to change.

It may weaken as we age.

And one day,

This body will become a corpse.

And it will decay.

It will go back into the earth,

Go back into the fire,

Go back into the elements.

This body is not different from the elements,

Which keep changing all the time.

This body is not me.

This body is not mine.

This body is not myself.

I am not the body.

Whatever I can observe in the body,

Through the body,

From the body,

Is not me,

Is not mine,

Is not myself.

I am letting go of the body.

I am dropping the body.

And I bring my attention to any sensations,

Any experience.

The sound of the voice that's speaking right now.

The sound of the crows.

The sound of the birds.

The sound of the cars.

The sound of construction.

This sound comes and goes.

These sensations,

The circulation of the fan,

The air on my skin.

All of it comes and goes.

The pain in the body,

If there is.

The feeling of spaciousness.

The internal arising and passing away of sensations in the body.

My thoughts.

My thoughts are not my thoughts.

Pull back.

Let your attention rest in itself.

Be aware of all of these sounds as they come and as they go.

The thoughts,

The reflections,

The concepts,

The ideas are just flowing traffic.

There is watching going on and observing of this traffic.

Pull back.

These sensations,

These thoughts,

These ideas are not me.

Are not mine.

Are not myself.

I am not them.

I drop my perception on them.

I let go of my awareness of them.

Any perceptions that arise,

Concepts of my name,

Of my family,

My relationships,

The color of my skin,

The culture I am born in.

All views that come and go in my mind.

All opinions are just conditioned by the outside world.

These are not my thoughts.

These are not my ideas.

These are not my concepts.

I am not my thoughts.

I am not my opinions.

I choose to let them go.

I choose to drop them.

All perceptions pass away.

Let your mind sink into the awareness of this emptiness of all perceptions.

No matter what I am experiencing,

No matter what disturbances around me,

All these are empty.

Empty of me,

Of mine.

Empty of myself.

I am free from all distractions.

Any choices that have arisen,

Any effort that arises is not me,

Is not mine,

Is not myself.

All intentions,

All craving,

Clinging,

Choosing,

Deciding,

Being,

Acting,

None of it is me,

Mine,

Or myself.

I choose to drop all of these.

Let the mind sink beyond these perceptions,

Beyond these choices,

Beyond these actions.

Let the mind sink into the clear blue sky of awareness.

In this awareness,

I encompass everything.

All distractions,

All disturbances,

All choices are in this awareness.

The awareness of sound,

The awareness of vision,

The awareness of the body,

The awareness of thoughts,

Even the awareness of this awareness,

I choose to relax.

I choose to sink deep into this awareness,

For all other awarenesses are not me,

Not mine,

Not myself.

I am free from every distraction,

Every awareness of all distractions,

Every awareness of all choices,

Of all sensations.

Now,

There are no options.

There is no me,

You,

Them.

There is no outside or inside.

There is no center.

There is no middle.

There is no boundary.

There is just awareness.

There is no I in this awareness.

There is no me in this awareness.

There is just awareness.

There is just flow of information,

A flow of attention,

A flow of consciousness.

I choose to drop this awareness as well.

It doesn't matter to me.

No awareness,

Awareness.

No cessation,

Cessation.

No suffering,

Suffering.

Freedom,

No freedom.

These are all concepts.

I choose to drop all concepts and just remain in non-conceptual reality.

No projections,

No ideas,

No images.

They're all within the scope of this blue sky of undifferentiated,

Boundless,

Borderless,

Free awareness.

Unconditioned,

Unclouded,

Uncreated,

Unborn,

Undying.

Not me,

Not mine,

Not myself.

Just rest and relax.

There is no going or coming,

No being or non-being.

No liberating,

No bondage,

No suffering.

No cessation,

No jhana,

No infinite space,

No nothingness.

No light,

No darkness,

No body,

No mind,

No sensation,

Just awareness.

There is only watching.

There is only observing.

There is only hearing.

There is only feeling.

There is only thinking.

There is only meditating.

There is only being.

No difference between inside and outside,

Me or them,

This or that.

Pure,

Unconditioned,

Undifferentiated,

Unmanifest.

Doesn't matter if there's quiet or no quiet,

Silence or no silence,

This world or the other.

All of it is within this unconditioned,

Absolute,

Unmanifested reality.

This reality pervades,

Transcends,

And is enmeshed in all.

It is the all.

Free from choices.

Free from differentiation.

The I,

The me,

The myself sinks,

Melts,

Evaporates into this reality.

There is nothing but this reality.

The absolute.

This is the shelter,

This is the refuge,

This is the island.

This is just this.

Nowhere to go.

Nowhere to be,

Nothing to become,

Nothing to accomplish.

No goals,

No direction,

No choices,

No object,

No subject.

No nothing,

No everything.

Just this.

Reality.

Just the absolute.

Just rest.

Just sink into it.

Nothing else,

Nothing else.

There is no mind,

A quiet mind,

A signless mind,

No jhana,

No hindrance,

No duality,

No duality,

No separation,

No union.

In the seeing,

There's only the seeing.

In the hearing,

There's only the heard.

There's only seeing,

Only hearing,

Only being.

In the pain,

There's only the pain.

In the pleasure,

There's only the pleasure.

Just this is the end of suffering.

Total being.

Total,

Absolute presence.

This presence is there all the time.

Available here,

Right now,

In all situations.

It is self-luminous,

Free of all defilements.

This is our nature,

Our true nature.

This is what the world stems from.

This absolute reality,

Free of all conditions and concepts.

In all conditions and concepts.

Beyond experience and in all experience.

Beyond sensations and in all sensations.

Beyond thinking and in all thoughts.

Beyond body and in all bodies.

Beyond identity and in all identities.

Beyond this world and in this world.

Just this,

Available freely to all,

Everywhere.

I want you to slowly bring this awareness,

This understanding,

This experience in the body.

Embody it,

Ground it to the body,

Ground it to the senses,

Ground it to the mind.

And when you're ready to come out of this sit with that absolute,

Pristine presence of mind.

Beyond all conceptual minds.

Bring it back here,

As you come out of the sit.

And when you open your eyes,

That presence has always been there.

And will always be there.

As you start to feel into your body,

Do so with that presence of mind.

And as you open your eyes,

Do so with that presence of mind.

And as you move around in the body.

And if you choose to move around in your chair or in your seat.

Do so with that presence of mind.

And when you're ready,

You can open your eyes and be here now.