This is a guided meditation for being in healthy and even empowered relationship with the idea of failure.
As always,
I'd like to invite you to welcome in the gentle,
Soothing,
Havening touch,
Moving hug,
Shoulders to elbows,
Cross the brows,
Around the cheekbones,
Or gently running your palms together as though you're washing your hands under warm water.
And let's begin with a gentle breath,
And I count to four,
Three,
Two,
One.
Slow release,
We count to six,
Two.
And I'd like to invite you to imagine that you're standing in front of a whiteboard or a chalkboard,
And that the word failure is written on that board in big letters.
Just invite your mind and your body to notice that word,
To fail,
Have failed.
And invite your mind and your body to share with you any thoughts or feelings or sensations that start to arise when you think about that word.
Failure,
Mind to wander as you ponder everything you know,
Or have been taught about the experience of failure.
And just failure,
When you think about that idea as you see it on that board,
A color,
Maybe a symbol.
You know,
Weight,
Is it heavy or light?
Is it dark or bright?
What does the construct of failure feel like in your mind's eye?
And as you notice that word written there in front of you,
Invite you to start to explore if everything that just came to mind belongs to you.
Or are these things that you've been taught experiences or people,
Society,
School,
Across the course of your life?
What have you been taught about the idea of failure means to fail?
Is it positive,
An opportunity to learn and grow?
Or perhaps,
Like many of us,
Your mind and body have learned that failure's bad,
Less than preferable,
Perhaps even unacceptable.
I want you to notice with great intention what have you been taught about this word that's written in front of you,
Failure.
And as you do so,
Let's continue to gently breathe and then deepen our breath into our abdomen,
Expanding our relationship with ourself and this word.
Gently breathing in,
Filling your body with as much air as you can muster.
And slow,
Easy release when you're ready.
Still inviting your mind to explore what failure has meant for you.
What is your mind's story about failure?
And imagine that all those things that you've been taught,
Perhaps experiences that might be coming to your mind,
Are like balloons that you just fill up with air and each balloon as you fill it is now filled with that construct of failure.
Because that's all they are,
They're constructs,
They're experiences,
And the experience may feel like it's a deeply defining part of you,
But it's only defining because of the narrative that your mind and your body carries about the idea of failure.
It's pretty cool.
You just keep filling up those balloons until you don't need to fill up any more thoughts,
Thoughts,
Feelings,
Ideas,
Experiences.
Just keep building your balloon pile of what is failure for you and we're just externalizing it into these balloons,
They're just gonna sit there.
And then on your other side,
I'd like to invite you to think about a time when you've seen a toddler stumble and fall,
Right on their bum.
And as you think about that,
As you bring that image to your mind,
Thoughts or feelings do you have as you notice that little toddler?
And in your mind's eye,
Notice that toddler starting to get back up because that's what they do,
They try again,
Right?
And if you're a parent yourself,
Or an auntie or an uncle or a grandparent,
You spend time with children,
What are we usually doing as adults when they fall?
Hey,
Come on,
Come on,
You got this,
Right?
We're supporting them,
We're cheering them on.
And on this other side,
As you're walking through this beautiful narrative of this little one learning to walk,
Something that we do as humans,
I want you to start making a list in your mind's eye of all of those thoughts and those feelings.
What comes to mind as you watch this little one learn to walk?
Nope,
They just fell again.
What is that?
What happened?
You grin,
You check in on them.
And as they stumble back to their feet,
What happens?
You see,
We're designed for failure because failures are the opportunities that we have for learning.
Our brain gets muddled,
Our amygdala gets muddled in all of these stories of failure.
And so I'd like to invite you to start popping those balloons that you felt.
Letting go of those old narratives.
As you bring each one,
You can even imagine you're holding in your hand and not feeling anything.
Next one,
I don't mean to feel shameful about that.
I learned.
The next one,
Same thing.
Let go that narrative that somebody else taught you.
And let's keep in mind that little one.
Notice those sensations,
Those feelings,
Those words,
Emotions that you wrote there.
I'd like to invite you to just wipe out that word failure on that board in front of you.
Just gonna streak through it.
And what word would you like to put in its place?
The next time you make a mistake or fail,
We want to teach our system to view this as a first attempt in learning.
And sure,
Maybe it's something you've done 30 times before,
But guess what?
The reason we make a mistake is because something different happens.
It's still a first attempt.
What word do you want to write on that board instead next to this powerful list that you've created as you spent time with that little one learning to walk?
Growth,
Strength.
Once you have your word,
Go ahead and write it on that board.
Big,
Bold,
And vibrant.
And welcome in a gentle breath as you step back and you notice your chosen word.
Where does that energy live in your mind,
In your body?
What does it feel like when you're embodying that?
And notice that your brain has the capacity to feel that way,
Just like that.
Intentional attention.
And I invite you to lean into this new chosen state anytime you start to go down that old narrative path of failure,
What it means to make a mistake.
Because those are just stories that your brain learned along the way.
And our brain loves to learn and grow up.
It's plastic,
Not real plastic,
But it's neuroplastic.
So when we use that to guide our brain,
We get to build the brain within which we want to navigate the world.
I'm going to leave you with one other little homework assignment here.
I invite you to make a list of all the times that you feel like you failed or made a mistake.
And spend some intentional time reworking those situations from this new mindset.
The word you just put up there.
What would be different about these experiences from that state of embodiment,
That state of energetic engagement?
It's a joy being a part of this journey with you.
I look forward to seeing you soon.
