Topics Include Shame, Stress & Overwhelm Live Q & A 2/4/21

Thank you.

Hello everybody.

Welcome,

Welcome,

Welcome to another Thursday Night Live.

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Let's pop the comments up so I can read them.

So I can see you all saying hi and hello and asking your questions.

So here we are.

I'm guessing you guys can probably tell that the video quality is not what it usually is because my computer crashed.

So it's out getting fixed.

So I'm using my tablet for everything this week.

Which seems to be working fine with my clients so far and I think it'll be okay with this,

Especially for one show.

So yeah,

Come on,

Fire your questions away.

And I am going to start with one.

I'm not going to say who it's from unless this person cares to reveal themselves because I kind of,

You know,

I want to respect people's privacy.

So they emailed me ahead of time.

So I kind of had this on the back burner.

And the question is,

What are some of the tools you recommend for overcoming and healing shame?

Shame.

Shame is one of those words that like as soon as you hear it,

It's like,

Okay,

This is some serious stuff.

Hello,

Sarah.

Yeah,

And I know I've asked this before and I was going to stop asking,

But since I'm using my tablet,

Let me know how the volume is or,

You know,

If there's any problems technically that I can fix,

Let me know.

Just put a comment up and I'll see it.

Thank you.

So,

So yeah,

Shame.

You know,

I was thinking about this and the shame.

What I was thinking was like,

Oh,

Well,

Shame.

It kind of feels like I always say the same thing.

And I was,

I was thinking about that.

So I was like,

Well,

Is there another angle to come at this from?

And what I was getting was,

Not really.

Not really.

It's,

You know,

The shame is pretty straightforward.

So my brain kind of went right to that.

And I think a lot of things are like this.

You know,

We always say spirituality is not easy,

But it's very simple.

And that's the case.

It's very simple.

And maybe the deeper things get,

Because shame is deep.

That's a very,

Very low vibration.

I mean,

Much lower than anger and frustration,

Stuff like that.

So it's,

You know,

Shame is a big deal.

Like if you're walking around in shame,

That can do some serious damage in your life and can hold you back in many ways.

And I think we all carry some levels of shame.

So it's not like,

Oh my God,

You're messed up.

I mean,

We all have shame.

It's just when we are aware of it,

When we know what we're carrying it around,

It's really going to behoove us to do the work and to work through it,

Because it's a big deal.

It's very dense vibration.

And as we release it,

The relief is going to be profound,

Which is wonderful.

I mean,

Who doesn't want a profound relief and a feeling of well-being because of that?

So you got to go in and you got to do the work.

And the biggest thing with shame is that you just can't stand the light.

Most things are like this.

Darkness can't stand the light.

So with shame,

It's not easy.

It takes courage.

You got to dive into your spiritual warrior mode to dig up the courage to do it.

But it's real simple.

You just have to talk to somebody about it.

You have to bring it up to the light and talk to somebody.

And you should be careful who you talk to,

Because it needs to be somebody that not only that you trust,

But you trust with an open heart.

And that's important too.

When you start talking about sensitive things like shame,

If you bring up shame to the wrong person and they're not capable of handling it,

That can be very detrimental because you're in a very vulnerable state when you're bringing shame up.

And if somebody is incapable of handling that and they just pack some more shame on top of it,

It's going to be even harder to bring up next time.

So you need to really be careful who you're picking.

And the length of time you know somebody is not a qualification.

The blood you have running through your veins is not a qualification.

So it doesn't matter if they're a family.

It doesn't matter if they've been a friend of yours for 40 years.

That's not a qualification to open up your heart and share your shame.

They need to be compassionate.

They need to be emotionally available.

They need to be sensitive without being overly fearful and trying to protect you from feeling anything.

It's one of the biggest things that we have to allow people to go through their emotions to some degree.

We can be there for them and we can support them.

But it used to happen regularly,

Not only in my workshops but other workshops that I had been to.

In a spiritual community,

There's so many loving,

Caring,

Big-hearted people that somebody starts going through a process to release trapped energy.

And the emotions start bubbling up and people run over there to try to comfort them and to make them feel better.

And it just diminishes the process.

It stops them from processing what they need to process.

Now all of a sudden it's about the emotion and it's not about the process that they're going through.

So you need to be with somebody that knows how to handle that type of stuff.

You can go through your process in a safe environment without being judged and supported without somebody pulling away from your experience.

So you can actually get it,

Work through it and be on the other side of it.

But believe it or not,

As difficult and painful as shame is,

It's so simple.

And there's not a heck of a lot to it.

You bring up shame and you talk to it in a situation and environment with somebody like I just described.

Like 90% of it's gone.

I mean,

You might have to do some follow-up work a little bit here and there and make sure you're shifting your perspective.

From whatever perspective you had that made you feel shame,

That made you think that feeling shame was the appropriate response to the situation you experienced,

You're going to have to shift that mindset.

So,

You know,

Yeah,

You do have to do a little bit of work on that.

Hopefully the person that you're talking to would be able to guide you through that.

But that's kind of it.

The biggest thing with shame is that it's hidden.

That's what shame is.

That's what makes it so bad.

So when you bring it up to the surface and you talk about it,

It's not hidden anymore.

So like 90% of the work is done right there.

It's just getting it off your chest and standing in it.

Because when you do that,

The natural healing automatically takes place.

Because that's the dynamic of shame.

It says like,

There's something wrong with me.

I'm broken.

I can't be fixed.

I'm dysfunctional and it's not okay.

And as soon as you bring that up to the light and into reality,

It becomes glaringly obvious that that's not true.

Shame only makes sense in our heads,

Like within us.

Lots of things are like that.

When we're stuck in our heads and when that's the only thing that is determining reality from non-reality and truth from lies,

We can get very confused.

This is one of the reasons we are social animals.

We need each other.

It's not just to procreate.

We need each other to stay sane.

This is why people go crazy on deserted islands.

Things start getting wacky when we're stuck in our own head.

Weird things make sense.

And when you bring it out into the light,

We've all experienced this on some level.

You're talking to somebody.

You've been thinking for like two weeks about something.

And you finally see the person you've been waiting to talk this over with.

And you start saying it.

And as the words are coming out of your mouth,

You're like,

Oh my God,

That makes no sense whatsoever.

That doesn't even make sense.

What was I thinking?

It made sense in my head.

It's the same thing with shame.

When you bring it up to it,

It seems like it's this gigantic burden because it's a version of fear that holds it there.

So fear always has the same dynamic.

It seems overpowering.

It seems really scary.

It seems,

Seems,

Seems everything that it seems to be.

And then as soon as you walk through it,

You realize it was just an illusion.

It wasn't overwhelming.

It wasn't overpowering.

It wasn't actually anything.

It was just an illusion.

It wasn't actually there.

So fear always has that dynamic to it.

That's how fear works.

It's not real.

It's an illusion.

So when you bring shame up into the light,

All of a sudden it loses its power.

You know,

Shame isn't shame in the light.

It automatically transmutes.

It's just,

You know,

It was shame and it was,

Oh my God,

Down here.

And then all of a sudden when it comes out in a safe atmosphere,

It's instantly transmuted because now it's no longer hidden.

So therefore it's no longer shame.

And it starts losing its power because the power,

Its power comes from being hidden.

That's the whole dynamic of shame.

It has to stay hidden.

Otherwise it loses its power.

So,

So yeah,

It's very simple.

It's,

You know,

Doesn't mean it's easy,

But it's very simple.

And I think,

I think the more,

The more powerful things are like that,

The closer you get to the truth,

You simplify.

Further you get from the truth,

You complicate.

So,

You know,

It's,

It's the same thing with,

With anything really,

You know,

Probably.

I don't,

And I'm going to say this,

I don't know if it's true,

But it was coming to me earlier.

Like the,

The more deeply powerful something is,

The more simple it is.

You know,

Like love is very simple.

It's,

And it's the most powerful thing there is.

And,

You know,

Fear is very simple and it's very detrimental.

Like depression is a very,

Very low vibrating energy too.

You know,

And years ago I was,

I was doing one of my things,

Trying to understand things on a,

On a new level.

And I was thinking about depression and it was like depression equals non-movement.

And to me,

That was very simple.

There's no movement in depression.

That's why it's so dangerous.

That's why anger can be healthier than depression because anger can incite movement.

It can have some negative consequences and we can make some bad choices out of anger,

But at least they can be some movement.

Whereas depression implies non-movement.

So that's why it's so dangerous because you never kind of,

You don't even have any hope for movement,

You know?

So,

But,

But that's very simple.

Depression is non-movement.

So what,

What helps depression?

Movement.

You know,

I mean,

I'm sure,

Of course,

There can be different parts of,

Different aspects of movement,

But,

But it's simple.

This is my point.

I think,

You know,

The,

The deeper we go into these things,

The more simple they get.

And yes,

Nicole.

Life begins where fear ends.

Yeah,

That's it.

I mean,

It's,

You know,

We're going to,

We're going to experience fear.

It's going to happen.

It's just a matter of,

Are we going to let it hold us back or are we not?

You know,

That's one of the,

You know,

I did a podcast on shame.

So of course,

If you guys want more in depth,

You know,

Diving in,

Go listen to that podcast.

Most,

Most podcast channels you can search,

You know,

There's a search bar in there somewhere in the menu or somewhere.

So just put in shame and you should be able to find that one on shame.

And it's the,

What was I going to say?

I kind of lost my,

My train because I went off on that a little bit.

But the life beginning where fear ends,

It's,

Oh,

It was the love and the fear thing.

That's what I was going to say.

So there's,

You know,

We have to,

We can simplify making our decisions in life because if you look at a life choice and you go,

Okay,

Why would I make this life choice?

And why wouldn't I make this life choice?

If you make two lists,

One why you would make the life choice and one why you wouldn't make that life choice.

You should be able to see that one of those,

Either the would or the wouldn't is based in fear and the other one is based in love.

So then it's just a matter of asking yourself,

How do I want to live my life?

Do I want to live my life?

Making decisions based in fear reasoning,

Or do I want to live my life based in love reasoning?

You know,

You either live in love or you live in fear.

It's very simple.

So,

You know,

When I moved,

I moved many times,

But every time I moved,

It comes down to basically a different version of why would I move?

And for some reason,

I thought that the place I was planning on moving to or thinking about moving to,

I would enjoy my life more there.

Like one time moving to a horse farms and getting a dog,

That being in nature,

That sounded like a lifestyle I would enjoy more.

Moving to Florida,

It was warmer.

It's a lifestyle I enjoy more.

Moving to the DR,

It's a lifestyle I enjoy more.

So basically it was some version of enjoying my life more,

Which was why I would move.

And then whenever I looked at the reasons why I wouldn't move,

Sometimes they were money-based,

Sometimes they were walking into the unknown,

Not knowing what I was getting into.

Sometimes they were out of concern for family or friends.

How would it affect them?

So that side is all fear,

Fear,

Fear,

Fear.

And enjoying my life is love.

So it's very easy.

So once I see that,

I can't not move.

I can't.

That's why I move so often is because once I look at a situation and I go,

I think that this,

I would enjoy the lifestyle of living in this area more.

And then why wouldn't I?

Well,

Because I'm going to be inconvenienced for a week or two moving and there's some fear around it in different ways.

I just,

I can't choose.

I can't choose the fear one.

I can't.

Like I can't live with myself by living like that.

You know,

I made that choice many years ago.

And who knows,

You know,

Like I see Nicole here and Nicole knew me when I was young and crazy.

And I kind of had that aspect to me back then in a different way.

It was irrational and it wasn't thought out well.

And it led me into making some really foolish,

Bad decisions.

But I wasn't ruled by fear.

Now I use logic and I actually make logical,

Good,

Healthy choices.

And I'm still not ruled by fear.

And now it's working for me.

Back then I was using it irresponsibly and it wasn't working for me.

You know,

So.

So now it is.

And hey,

Guys,

Keep firing some questions in here.

I can't go on this forever.

Well,

I probably can.

You guys that know me,

I could probably ramble forever.

But I still like to hear your input questions,

You know,

Stuff like that,

If there's something you want want me to tweak or expand on,

I can do that.

Specific situation you're dealing with.

And we can always change topics.

It doesn't have to be on this topic.

So.

So,

Yeah,

It's,

You know,

Choose to live your life.

Was that OK?

All right,

Nicole just gave me some fuel.

Was there ever a time you were fearful?

Yeah,

Man.

I mean,

It was the only reason that like I was the people who knew me when I was younger.

The only reason that I was so I wouldn't let fear rule me is not because I was like what people saw externally.

It was because I was scared shitless internally.

It's the so the reason I got to where I got to when people really got to know me,

You know,

In high school and stuff and after was because.

When I was young,

It was kind of a kind of a rough neighborhood.

I mean,

Everybody ran around fighting and stuff.

And and I was no different.

And everybody in the neighborhood was a little bit older or a little bit bigger,

It seemed there,

You know,

And I wasn't a very good fighter anyway.

So like,

You know,

I got picked on quite a bit and I fought back for a while.

And then a teacher chilled me out like in fifth grade and I started relaxing.

Then by the time I got to high school,

Freshman year,

The picking on was getting really bad.

And I had a really bad freshman year.

And that that that summer between freshman sophomore year,

I was distraught,

Man.

I was messed up.

And I remember that summer just laying in my bed,

Just crying,

Just fearful,

Talking to people like,

What do I do?

Nobody had any good answers.

You know how to deal with this stuff.

I,

I was a sensitive person and I didn't know how to fit into the typical old school boys world.

I just wanted to be friends with everybody.

And that's not how it was.

So like you needed to stand up for yourself or so it seemed so.

Or you had to have some sort of gift where you could,

I don't know,

For some reason,

Some people had this gift where they just wouldn't get picked on that much.

And I just didn't.

I think my mouth was too big.

Like I was always smack dab in the middle of a situation.

Whereas other people could,

Were a little bit more quiet and they could kind of just slide by when the attention went to them.

And that just wasn't me.

So if I was there,

I was probably going to get picked on.

So what happened that summer was I just decided I wasn't going through the next three years of school like that.

It just wasn't going to happen because I didn't,

I couldn't stand the fear inside of my body.

I was just completely consumed with fear.

I would,

I would lay there just shaking,

Just thinking about it and find.

So I was like,

OK,

What are you scared of,

Glenn?

And this may have been like,

You know,

Now I think back and it's like,

Geez,

Glenn,

Your mind always worked in this logical way.

So I was like,

What are you scared of?

And I'm like,

I guess I'm scared of getting beat up.

I mean,

That's what you pull away from when you're getting picked on.

And it's like,

OK,

What about getting beat up scares you?

Physical pain,

I guess.

I don't want to experience physical pain.

So I was like,

OK,

Well,

You have a choice.

You either get over this fear or you live in it.

And at that time,

At 15 years old,

All I could see was I have to get over my fear of getting beat up.

So how do you get over that fear?

You walk through it.

So I was like,

I'm going to school and I'm going to start shit with every person that comes near me.

And and I'm going to get my ass kicked.

This was my intention.

I was going to get my ass kicked so many times until I wasn't scared of getting beat up anymore.

I was going to get used to getting my ass kicked.

That that was my intention.

And I walked into school and the first person that gave me some crap,

I went after them like a maniac.

All that pent up anger and frustration came flying out of me and I saw people started backing off.

And I was like,

Oh,

Wow.

So like if somebody attacks,

If you attack back 10 times harder,

You usually win.

Like they'll back down.

Not too many people really want to fight.

People want to put other people down.

That's what they want to do.

They want to they want to feel like they're tougher than they're better than they're stronger than they're in control of the situation.

Most people don't actually want to fight.

And most people really don't want to fight somebody that they can't predict.

So like,

You know,

I'm supposed to be some little kid that you can pick on.

And all of a sudden I come back flying at you like a crazed animal.

And that like was very unsuspecting.

I didn't know how to deal with that.

And it worked really well.

So that's what I did.

And,

You know,

We do what works and it worked.

Now,

Was is that a good thing to do in that situation?

No.

You know,

It wasn't the best way to handle it.

It was the best way my 15 year old brain could figure out how to handle it.

And it worked.

I wasn't fearful.

I wasn't getting picked on.

So I kept doing it and it became a way of life.

You know,

In all ways,

Not just with fighting,

But how I lived.

If there was something that scared me,

I ran right at it.

And like I said,

I there was no thought.

There was no rationale.

There was no concern for my own safety.

So I did it in a foolish way.

And I did a lot of stupid things because of that,

You know,

And a lot of dangerous things because of that.

And got hurt a lot of times because I got trouble and trouble because of that.

So it wasn't the best way to handle it,

But it did work.

It got rid of the fear.

I didn't I wasn't walking around with the fear inside me.

So that that was really where it all began.

Me getting rid of the fear.

I look back on it now and I understand that.

Like,

Really what the answer is,

Is confidence.

Like I was I was exuding confidence in the way I was acting.

But.

I was I was acting very aggressively and that's not healthy.

So like really the you know,

The biggest helpful thing that I found is,

Is if somebody is picking on you,

You just can't give them the power.

Like you you can make a joke of your own accord.

You know,

Like if somebody is going to pick on you.

Oh,

That that hat's stupid.

Yeah,

I know.

I know.

But I love it.

Oh,

I'm an idiot.

What can you do?

You know,

I mean,

Now that type of thing is self-deprecating.

So I don't do it,

But it would have been a healthier tool when I was 15.

And I did do some of that stuff.

I learned some of those techniques when I was younger.

But it's confidence.

If somebody can't make fun of you because they can't hurt your feelings,

They can't because you're confident in yourself.

That's the best thing that you need to do.

In those situations,

Like I said,

I just didn't know that.

So,

So,

Yeah.

And then what?

So that's that's where it all started in the young life and then older,

When older in life,

Later in life,

After I woke up spiritually.

Yeah,

There's been many times when I'm fearful.

You know,

Courage is not absence of fear.

It's action in the face of fear.

I still get scared.

You know,

I mean,

It still comes up.

I just don't let it own me.

I see it.

I just don't let it own me.

So it's.

Yeah,

I mean,

You want to talk fear?

I was I was going to go to try to get,

Try to get custody of my son after going to family court for 10 years.

And getting my ass handed to me and chewed out by judges half the time because I didn't because I couldn't afford a lawyer.

So I was an asshole for wasting their time and making them think like I had a lot of bad experiences in family court.

And now I have to I had to get past all the fear of that and go for custody.

Knowing that if it didn't work,

Whatever was going on in my son's household now was going to be 10 times worse because now I was he was standing up for himself against what was going on.

And then he was going to have to stay in that house.

So,

Yeah,

I've you know that I've been in plenty of situations where I've had to transcend,

You know,

Transcend that fear.

And it can be done.

You just have to put the power in.

I had to take the power away that I was handing to the Rhode Island court system and to my ex-wife.

I had to take that back and put it to my higher power.

I had to believe that whatever ran the universe was more powerful than the Rhode Island court system.

And when I took my power and put it in the hands where it belonged,

That was very helpful.

Wasn't easy,

But it was helpful.

So cool.

I got some input here.

I'm going to.

Raina Wilson.

Love your show.

So helpful.

Thank you,

Raina.

And I love that name,

Raina.

I actually named my one of my dogs,

Raina,

In years back because I love the name so much.

So thank you.

Thank you for watching.

I appreciate it.

Let's see.

Abby.

So Abby is asking,

How do you deal with stress today?

How do you deal with stress in today's world?

And I'm going to start on this,

Abby.

And if you want to get more specific as I go,

Feel free to put more comments.

The first thing I would stress dealing with anything is we have to understand the thing that we're dealing with.

And the biggest misconception of the biggest the world's filled with them.

One of the biggest misconceptions and socially acceptable ways of looking at things is that they are stressful.

My job is stressful.

People go,

Oh,

Yeah,

I know.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh,

Being a parent.

Stressful.

Oh,

Yeah,

Yeah,

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh,

You know,

Having a dog is stressful.

You know,

It's like having a kid sometimes.

Yeah,

Yeah,

Yeah,

Yeah.

Oh,

Poor me.

And people just talk like that.

Nothing is stressful.

Jobs aren't stressful.

Parenting isn't stressful.

Situations are not stressful.

Stress is not being induced to you by an external circumstance.

That's not how stress works.

Stress is a response to an external stimuli.

So you have a job.

You don't have a stressful job.

You have a job.

Your response to that job is stressful.

That's the problem is your response.

It's not the job.

Now,

Usually when I come out and I don't know if Abby is listening to me before,

You know,

Some people I know,

Some people I don't.

I don't recognize the name.

But,

You know,

When people usually hear stuff like that,

It usually stings at first because I'm basically saying that you're the problem.

But think of it this way.

Like if stress was external and you that would mean that you have no control over it and you have no hope for ever living a happy life.

If your job was a source of stress,

Then you're screwed.

If being a parent is a source of stress,

You're screwed because you can't control that.

You can't change anything.

You're just you.

So if the external circumstances are causing the stress,

You're screwed.

So as much as we think we would like it to be like that,

Swallowing the bitter pill that it's our response that's the problem is actually our only gateway to the solution.

Understanding that because like when you have jobs or you have parents or you have any situation at all that people call stressful,

There is one person that's experiencing stress from it.

Probably most people because we're all unconscious and not interacting with life properly.

That's why most people aren't happy.

So don't do what most people do.

So most people are going to say,

You know,

Be experiencing stress because of the situation.

And then there's going to be one or two people who aren't stressed out because that situation.

So what's the difference?

It's the same situation,

But yet some people are stressed by it and some people aren't.

Well,

It's so it can't be the situation.

It literally has to be the person.

It has to be the person.

You know,

So that's the simplicity of the answer.

That's where that's where you start.

Just really swallowing that and understanding that to be true and maybe playing around with it until you understand it deeply.

Once you're there,

Then you can start learning how to deal with it.

And then that kind of depends on the person.

You know,

Some people we all have coping mechanisms.

We develop them between the ages of four and eight.

Most of them.

Sometimes later in life or even earlier through extreme circumstances.

But generally between the ages of four and eight,

We basically made sense of the world in which we were in.

And we locked onto those belief systems and they're based on what our parents and our neighbors and our friends were all teaching us.

Up until that age and what they taught us was what was taught them a dysfunctional way of living in this world.

And we're we're seeing now that the way we're living in this world doesn't work and we're searching for another way.

You know,

This is why the world is changing.

The old ways don't work anymore.

Like two,

Three generations ago,

If you came in and said,

Geez,

I'm really having difficulty at my job because it's very stressful.

And like,

Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy.

I don't know.

I think I might have to quit or I don't know.

I don't think I can take it.

If you said that to somebody two or three generations ago,

They'd be like,

What are you talking about?

You just go to work,

You do your thing and then you go home.

What they wouldn't even understand what you're experiencing.

But that is what that is,

Is that's a change in in in the way people are.

We are more sensitive now because we need to be to induce a new way of thinking into this world.

The old way of thinking doesn't work before people,

You know,

People sat on a stool and put two pieces of metal together and stepped on a pedal for eight,

Ten hours a day and did that for 40 years.

Do you think that was fulfilling to them?

Of course not.

But it was good enough.

It was fine.

You know,

A lot of times.

A lot of times people had had marriages that weren't the best,

But they're like,

You know what?

He doesn't beat the kids that often.

And he brings a paycheck home.

Sigh.

You know,

It's good enough.

We lived for generations on good enough.

We're not there anymore.

Good enough is not good enough anymore.

And that is that that's coming from within.

That's that's how people are being birthed into this world with this yearning for a new way of being that's happier and healthier.

And more fulfilling and more loving.

This is why when we are.

This is why stress has come into play.

You know,

Stress is a major problem in this world and it hasn't always been.

So why has stress become a gigantic issue in the world in the last 20 or 40 years?

Right.

So like why?

It's,

You know,

People have been going to work their entire lives.

Now all of a sudden people go to work and it's very stressful.

Why?

Because we can't.

That is that's the spiritual awakening that's trying to happen.

We have to live in a loving,

Fulfilled,

Better way now.

Our expectations are our our inner expectations are different now.

This is why everybody is either addicted to drugs,

Alcohol,

Prescription drugs,

Television,

Social media,

Distraction,

Moving very fast.

Because these are all distraction techniques.

So we don't feel the uncomfortability that bubbles up when we're still.

And that uncomfortability is pushing us towards living our best life.

So that's what all this is about.

It's all about us living in accordance with nature and ourselves and becoming the best version of ourselves and following our passions.

You know,

This is we can't we can't get away living the way we've been living for the last several thousand years.

It's not going to work.

We've come to the end of technology seeking and like that the whole path we're on,

We're at the end.

We're going to blow ourselves off the planet as a species within the next 20 years,

Probably.

Like somebody is going to get hold of nukes,

Figure out a computer program that looks like the United States sent the first one and blow up the entire planet.

It's just a matter of time.

Something's going to happen like that.

You know,

Unless we change the way we are as a species,

The way we are living,

And that's what's bubbling up inside of us.

It's the push for us to become a more loving,

Connected,

Community based,

Loving species.

We have to change the way we're living.

You know,

And so stress is not a problem.

Stress is a symptom.

When you are experiencing stress at a job or a situation,

It's either because you're the way your brain is perceiving the stimuli is that you're a victim.

You know,

Like so take a typical stress job,

Like when you're really stressed out of your job,

It usually sounds something like,

I can't take it anymore.

I can't do this.

I can't.

I just can't go into that work environment anymore and subject myself to that.

I don't think I can do this much longer.

Right.

Like that's what it kind of starts sounding and looking like when you really hit the end of your stress levels and you're at the end of your rope.

So like,

Why does it sound like that?

It's I can't do it anymore.

You can't do what?

Go to work?

Like who's making you go to work?

You don't have to go to work.

You're choosing to go to work.

You know,

And we forget that.

So,

So some people actually don't even hate their jobs,

But they're so caught up in the victim mentality.

They've been telling themselves every morning for so many years that I don't want to go to work.

Why do I have to work?

I can't believe I have to go to work.

I don't really even like it there.

I don't.

I don't.

I don't.

And they feed that.

And then pretty soon they actually think that they're a victim of work.

You don't have to go to work.

Nobody's got a gun to your head.

You go to work because you choose to go to work.

Because making money,

The money that you make when you're at work,

At some point you decided that the money you made was it was worth going to this job.

So you could get that money so you could have the food and the roof over your head and the car and take care of your kids and stuff like that.

You made that choice when you first got that job that first day,

You weren't going,

Oh,

My God,

I can't.

I can't go tomorrow.

I can't go to my first day.

Why?

Why?

No,

You were going,

Sweet.

I got a job.

Now I can pay my bills.

Then a year later,

You're like,

Why do I have to go to work?

You forgot your why.

We all do something to get something.

So remember your why.

You know,

It doesn't mean you have to stay at a job,

But just understand that you're not a victim of it.

So some people,

It's just that you just shift your mentality and realize that like nobody,

I'm going to work because I like having a television and streaming Netflix.

That brings me joy.

So you think so.

So I like going on vacation.

So I'm going to go to work every day.

Yeah.

If you like what you're getting from going to work,

Then you're choosing it.

You can give up your house and the food and the Netflix and not go to work.

You have that choice,

But you chose to go to work because it gives you the things that you want it to.

So you're not a victim of it.

So,

You know,

So that's one thing that that sometimes it's just as simple as that as a shift.

Sometimes you have to understand that it's your choice to go and that can help temporarily,

But you actually have to get out of the job that you're in because it just ain't the right job for you.

I mean,

If you hate your job,

Go find another one.

There's plenty of them out there,

You know,

And you've got to make sure you don't fall into the lack.

Mindset.

There's there's jobs is like sometimes it could take people a year.

Two years,

Five years,

10 years to take one class a semester or whatever.

I don't care how slow you have to do it.

Just do it.

Because eventually in 10 years,

You'll be out of your job and you'll have done something five years,

One year.

But don't stay there acting like you have no choice because you have choices.

There are things you can do to to start new careers.

I started my business in the middle of that court battle that was a year and a half long to get custody for my son.

And he moved in with me the first day of court.

So now all of a sudden I was full time parent.

His mom stepped out of the picture.

I was full time everything.

My son was on three soccer teams and I'm starting a business while I'm collecting food stamps.

So like you if the if you're willing to make the commitment,

You can do it.

You know,

So the reason we don't do things and I think I'll probably touch on this to wrap it up,

Because.

Yeah.

When I said that,

It's funny,

Nicole.

Nicole just said.

Just do it,

Even if it's one class.

And it's funny because as soon as that came out,

It caught my attention,

Too.

So must be.

So I'm going to expand on that a little bit.

And I have podcasts on this,

Too,

That you can find.

Overwhelmed.

The reason we don't do things is because of overwhelm.

So what happens is we look at it,

We go,

Well,

I want to change careers,

But I don't know how.

Or I would have to get a four year degree and that's too big of a project.

Or I want to start a business,

But I don't even know how.

Or,

You know,

All that I could go on for 16 years about the excuses why people don't do it.

But the problem is not the excuses.

That is that it's too big.

It's just too big.

So whatever it is,

Just keep chopping it down into smaller pieces like we're not.

We're so we think we're supposed to see the end result like 12 steps ahead before we take step one.

And that's not how life works.

The way life works,

Because we change every step we take.

So we go,

Oh,

Well,

I could see myself.

I'll try to come up with an example.

That's kind of obvious.

So what I mean.

I could see myself going to college and I could see myself getting my bachelor's degree,

But there's no way I could do a doctorate because like you have to go work inside hospitals and not make any money.

And I wouldn't be able to afford to live.

So I there's no way I could do that.

So that so people actually don't do things because of something that's eight years into a plan.

Like that's not how life works.

Like we change every step.

So you take the step that you're if there's something that's your passion,

This one you want to do,

Take step one.

And then you will grow from taking step one.

You become more confident,

You become a little bit more understanding of the path that you're on.

You become more self-empowered,

Your self-love rises.

Now,

Also,

You're capable of taking step two.

Then you become more,

You know,

The same things,

More courage,

More strength,

More confident in yourself.

And then you can take step three.

You are literally not the same person taking step three as you were taking step one.

You are literally lit to really a different person.

We change our skin and our all the cells in our body almost every year.

Psychologically,

It's the same.

If somebody has more self-confidence and more self-love,

They literally act and behave and accomplish things that they didn't six months earlier because they didn't have that stuff.

So you literally change as a person as you take each step.

So you just do what you're capable of right then.

If it's taking classes,

Then look at it and take one.

If it's starting a business,

Call the Small Business Administration and say,

What services do you guys have?

Do you have any free workshops or something?

I took tons of those things for years.

Is there anybody I can talk to?

Because I have no idea what I'm doing.

I have an idea and I have no idea how to make it come to fruition.

But the phone call is literally step one.

Step one isn't making the phone call,

Figuring it out,

Having a business plan together.

And then going for a loan or something like that's not step one.

Step one is sitting there picking up the phone and going,

Help.

I don't know what to do first.

That's step one.

You know,

I built a website one time many years ago before the websites were like they are now.

And I literally I had to learn how to write HTML code and stuff.

So what I did is I Googled what is HTML code?

And then I read.

I was like,

OK,

I vaguely understand what HTML code is.

Then I had to Google,

How do you write HTML code?

And I vaguely understood that.

Then I was like,

How do you embed HTML code into a website?

I Googled that and then I said like I literally took those steps one step after the next step after.

What is this?

How do I do it once it's done?

How do I put it into a website?

Like those are small steps,

But this is how we accomplish things.

You just nobody think about it.

And I'll wrap it up with this.

Nobody that you see that has succeeded at anything knew what they were doing when they were going for it.

There is nobody that is successful in any area that was at the same level of capability,

Understanding,

Intelligence,

Know how,

Any of it.

When they were before they took step one.

Nobody.

But yeah,

Unconsciously,

This is what we this is what we do to ourselves.

We freeze ourselves with silliness.

That doesn't even make sense.

And then but when you when you really look at it,

This is why I love spirituality.

I'm talking spirituality here,

People.

This is spiritual living and people think spirituality is woo woo.

No,

Living thinking that stress is induced by a job.

That's woo woo,

Because when you look at it,

It doesn't make any sense.

That's woo woo,

Things that don't make sense and just kind of float around out there with no substance.

That's woo woo.

But yet most of the world is living in a woo woo world and pointing out spirituality,

Saying it's woo woo.

No,

Spirituality actually makes logical sense when you really break it down and look at it and you can see how it's going to work.

You know,

There was there was nobody that started a business that knew how to run a business before they started it.

It doesn't happen that way.

You learn as you do,

You know.

So there.

So so now you got those of you guys who don't watch me that often,

You know how my brain works.

I go,

Go,

Go,

Go,

Go.

And I ride that train that of information that's coming through me.

And when it stops,

It just stops.

And that's what just happened there.

I just was like I was finishing that sentence and I ran like this little check that I do.

I don't know really how to describe it.

It kind of happens fluidly.

But as I'm coming to the end of a thought,

I'm kind of at the same time running a check to see if any other information is coming.

And that time,

As I was finishing that sentence,

I ran the check and it was just a what?

There was nothing there.

And like my brain just stops.

And I go,

So there.

So,

Yeah,

Those of you that know me are pretty familiar with that because it's something I say often.

So there,

Because my brain just stops when the information stops.

So.

So there.

All right,

Peeps.

Yeah,

I got to keep these two under an hour from now on.

And just to let you know,

If you could send me a message through Facebook,

Hopefully,

Or an email if you have some input.

I,

I will try to read the comments,

Especially on here after we're after I end the show.

But I'm thinking about doing my life lessons and laughter podcast live like this.

And just basically picking one topic.

I'll still have comments coming in that I can feed off of,

But it's probably going to be one topic for the whole show.

So I'd love to get your input on that.

If you guys think it's a good idea or not.

So let me know.

By email Glenn at Glenn Ambrose dot com.

Or like I said,

You can always private message me here on Facebook or.

Or the comments,

Hopefully,

Hopefully I'll go back and read them.

So thank you for listening,

Everybody.

And thank you for the input.

It was this is why I like the input,

Because when it's when I'm going like when you guys put comments and ask questions and contribute.

It it really helps the energy flow.

I can connect to you guys better and then I can you know,

The information just flows that much better because I'm like connected with you.

So it really does help.

So thank you.

Hope you enjoyed it.

And if I can be of service in any way,

Shoot me an email to find out more.

That's step one.

Don't if you're thinking about working with me,

Don't make the decision before we chat.

Just shoot me an email,

Man.

You know,

We'll talk.

All right.

Take care.

Thanks for watching.

And I will talk with you guys soon.

This tablet's fighting me.

I got it.

See ya.

You.