"Worry", Talk , & Meditation

So my name is Seth.

Nice to see you guys here.

Who's been to a sit before?

Whose first time is it?

Who's not sure if they've come to one or not?

Is anybody like maybe?

So like I was saying,

I've been doing this for about a year here.

I think there was somebody doing it before me.

Is that correct?

Yeah.

I hope I do a better job.

So originally I'm from Andover,

So a little bit north of here.

When I graduated from college,

I went to a Buddhist monastery and I ordained as a monk.

So I lived there for eight years.

No hair,

Nice robe.

It's really easy deciding what to wear in the morning.

Yeah,

In 2014 I left,

Spent two years traveling through India and Australia.

I'm back here for about a year.

Bringing meditation to the community,

Some public schools also in the Massachusetts area,

And also yoga studios and also here.

And at the very beginning of the gathering,

So I was talking to some people about the theme of worrying.

And I was saying that this morning,

So I'm right now in Lawrence,

Which is,

You know,

Depending on traffic,

About 40 minutes north of here.

And yeah,

I was leaving.

I usually leave a little bit early,

Just give myself time.

But I looked at the phone and it said it would take me an hour to get here.

So then I thought,

Oh gosh,

I'm gonna be late.

So I kind of hurried downstairs to the car and I go outside to find my car kind of encased in a ball of ice.

So I'm like,

Okay,

Great.

So I kind of sit there and scraping away on the ice and then I get in the car,

Start driving.

And as I'm driving,

The time and the navigation's kind of ticking down,

Right?

So it was 59 minutes when I left the house and it was kind of saying that,

You know,

I was making good time,

I guess.

Until finally I kind of get into this area and it was 11.

30 and I was like,

Oh,

Awesome.

Like somehow that worked out.

There's no traffic and it was great.

So then I parked,

You know,

Down,

Was it Mass Ave?

Down there somewhere.

Plenty of time.

So I went and got a burrito and was hanging out.

I was like,

This is great,

I'm so early today.

And then it was 11.

40 and I was like,

Okay,

I'll start moseying down to MIT.

And I go to put the money in the meter and it's 15 minutes,

30 minutes.

Put in the next quarter,

30 minutes.

I was like,

Huh?

Put in another quarter,

30 minutes.

It's like,

What?

And I look and it's only a 30 minute meter.

And I was,

You know,

Pretty far down the road and I said,

That's not gonna work.

And the guy was next to me ticketing the car behind me so I know that they're like on top of it.

So again,

Like,

Oh God,

Okay,

I guess I'm not gonna make it after all.

And then I got in the car and just started driving and turned a corner and there's a parking spot.

I'm like,

Oh my God,

I am gonna make it.

And then I kind of ran over here.

And the whole time I was just reflecting on worry,

On this feeling that I was having of worry,

This anxiety of,

Oh my gosh,

I'm not gonna make it.

Even when I was in the car,

I said,

So if I don't make it,

You know,

It's to help self-organize a nice little meditation together,

I don't know.

So something will happen,

It'll be fine.

But this kind of,

You know,

Thought,

Does worrying help?

Does this help or not?

And my thought was there's a yes and a no,

That it has a reason in terms of it gives us energy,

Kind of helps you act or react or kind of be more present,

Gives like a burst of energy if you need it.

But it's also exhausting,

Right?

It's stressful,

It's not good for you,

I guess your health if you do it for extended periods of time.

And it seems like maybe a lot of us do it more often than we should,

Right?

That it kind of opens up.

And then also it was brought up that actually worrying has to do with not being able to control our situation.

We wanna have control,

But it's not necessarily possible.

And that feeling of being out of control,

But wanting that control and trying to almost force it to work the way that we want,

Or feeling terrified that it's not working,

Kind of activates some,

You know,

I don't even know how to say it,

Like ancestral feeling of when you're being chased by a bear or something,

This deep panic worry that makes you act or react.

But you're just sitting in your car,

It's not really life or death,

But somehow it's the same mechanism.

And if it's helpful or not,

Or kind of what that's about.

And I would say just after hearing your guys' reflection,

Which has been really awesome,

So I'm glad we had like a little brainstorm,

That it seems it's helpful in little,

In maybe certain bursts,

Right?

So for instance,

Right,

You're crossing the road,

A car comes,

That feeling which you could call,

I don't even know what you call that,

Worry,

Anxiety,

Panic,

But just that sudden burst of energy and oh my God,

To jump out of the way,

To do something,

To act,

To react,

Can be very helpful.

It can also be helpful to stay focused on a task.

A certain level of stress helps you stay focused on something.

Also,

If there's something big coming up,

It helps your mind keep remembering that that thing is coming,

To kind of start mentally and emotionally preparing yourself for that moment.

So I think it has functions like that.

And also there's times,

For instance,

Like in my case,

Where I was completely out of control,

I was doing the best I could.

It's not like that worry was helping me move faster through the traffic or worrying didn't help me find that parking spot.

That there's other times that it's just ridiculous,

That it's just kind of this fear.

So just kind of like as a mindfulness exercise,

Simply it's just something to look at in our lives.

When things like worry come up,

Anxiety,

In which ways are they helpful for us?

In which times we catch ourselves doing that and you just say to yourself,

Stop it.

You're hurting yourself,

It's ridiculous.

So that's just kind of where we're at for this today.

So as far as the meditation goes,

Who here has never meditated before,

Just so I know?

You're sitting in a good spot though.

If you sit close to me,

You get all the meditation vibes.

So yeah,

Really briefly,

I guess we could say that meditation,

It's the opposite of worrying.

So meditation,

It's really about being present,

Letting everything be OK,

Really just arriving,

Letting things go,

Letting our thoughts,

Our feelings kind of just come and go.

So not really trying to force it into any direction.

Worrying,

It's about controlling.

We're trying to control something.

Meditation,

It's actually about letting go of control consciously.

And especially here,

An environment that you're safe,

That it's OK,

That you really allow yourself to let go of control.

And that includes trying to control the meditation,

Trying to control having a peaceful mind,

Trying to control relaxing.

It's actually not about controlling anything.

It's really about sitting here,

Enjoying sitting here,

Enjoying the fact that you get to relax,

Enjoying the fact that you're not me who was stressed out coming down here for an hour.

You guys just could walk over here from wherever.

So just finding this enjoyment and this relaxation of just being here.

And then the rest comes by itself,

Then that peaceful mind,

That stillness,

That comes by itself when you feed these conditions,

When you feed the conditions of just relaxing.

So what we'll do is we'll sit with our feet flat on the floor.

Again,

If you want to sit on the floor itself,

Totally cool option.

I usually,

These are really weird chairs in this room,

But I usually slide forward on my chair a little bit.

So I'm actually still sitting upright.

So I'm not slouching the chair,

But I'm actually,

So feet on the floor upright.

Again,

Weird chair,

So if it doesn't work for you,

No problem.

You can find a place on the chair.

There's a bar in front.

You might want to slide behind that bar.

So it's about finding this balance,

This place between awakeness,

Alertness,

Awareness,

And totally letting go,

Totally relaxing.

So when you can find that balance between being fully awake yet fully relaxed,

The mind can find this place of stillness in the middle.

So to begin,

We sit in this position,

Taking a moment just to acknowledge that we're here in this room together,

Just to acknowledge that we're sitting here together for this purpose of meditation.

Then you can close your eyes,

And you can take a few deep breaths,

Breathing in deeply through the nose and out through the mouth.

As they say in the yoga classes,

You can have exaggerated exhalations.

Also,

Really just let go.

As you breathe out through your mouth,

Just let go of the things you want to let go of right now.

So using your breath as a tool.

As you relax and breathe,

I've brought with me a bell.

So I'm going to ring this bell a couple times.

Just listen,

Allowing your mind to follow the sound,

Staying relaxed,

Breathing.

So when we've closed our eyes,

We relax our eyes and our face,

Softening your forehead and your jaw.

Coming down the back of our neck,

We relax our shoulders and our arms.

We relax our hands and fingers.

We relax our chest,

Softening our heart,

Really allowing ourselves to be present in this moment together.

Moving down,

We relax our bellies,

Allowing ourselves to feel safe,

Allowing ourselves to let go and just to be here.

We soften the muscles in our back,

Down into our hips.

We relax our legs,

Down to our feet.

Relaxing our toes and feeling the ground underneath us.

We allow our mind to expand to get a sense of the space around us,

Feeling the room,

The spaciousness surrounding you.

And we feel our relaxed body sitting in the space.

As we breathe in,

Feeling the air flowing in through the nose,

The body filling.

Breathing out,

Feeling the air flowing out through the nose,

Body relaxing.

Air through the nose,

Body expanding.

And air through the nose,

Body relaxing.

If you feel restless,

Focus on the expansion and contraction of your belly as you breathe.

And if you're feeling peaceful,

Shift your focus to the flow of air coming in and out of your nostrils,

Allowing yourself to relax,

To enjoy sitting here in this moment having nothing to do,

To really just rest and breathe.

Really taking the next few minutes to rest and relax.

Just be with whatever's there.

As you breathe in,

Imagine relaxation coming in through the breath.

As you breathe out,

Imagine peacefulness flowing out to the space around you.

So breathing in,

Relax.

Breathing out,

Peace.

Staying relaxed,

Breathing deeply.

Listening again to three sounds of the bell.

Taking three deep breaths in through the nose,

Filling the body,

And out through the mouth,

Relaxing,

Releasing.

Very good.

Another breath,

Really deep in,

Filling up,

And deep out through the mouth.

Final breath,

Deep,

Deep,

Deep,

Full in through the nose.

And hold your breath for one second,

Two seconds,

And out through the mouth.

So we rub our hands together until they become warm.

Place our hands on our eyes.

Rub your eyes,

Your eye sockets,

Your face,

Head.

And rub your ears.

Going to warm them up.

Massage down the back of your neck and shoulders.

Can rub down one of your arms,

Down the other one of your arms.

Leaning forward,

Also rubbing your lower back,

The kidney area,

And then down.

Even your legs and knees.

Slowly open your eyes.

You can stretch out or shake out any way that you need to.

How's everybody doing?

Would I be going out on a limb when I say it feels like you guys need this every day?

Yeah,

I encourage you guys to practice.

If you don't already,

To do this by yourself.

Or even to reach out to other people around you and say,

Hey,

Who wants to meet?

Whether around the same time,

On other days,

Or in the mornings,

Even friends.

But to really bring this a little bit more into your life.

So I'm kind of lucky because I teach meditation every day,

Pretty much.

I get to do this as my job.

So I don't have to worry about trying to make a personal practice.

But to try to find a time to do this more often,

Because I really feel in the room that you guys are really basking in that.

And that it seems like you really,

It's like a sponge right here.

It really felt like you needed more of that energy,

That relaxation,

Letting go energy.

So feel free to try to self-organize,

Whether just by yourself or with a small group,

To do a little more of this.

Because I think once a month is not enough.

Any app?

I tried out the Headspace app,

Which is pretty good.

I also,

Myself,

Made a guided meditation on YouTube that you can just sit and play straight up or meditate with it,

Which can be a good resource.

So I have some cards if anybody wants to be in touch with me afterwards or get any of that info.

Otherwise,

Have a nice and relaxing day.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Good to see you.

Good to see you.

I'll take all of you.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Pleasure.

Can I take my office?

Yeah.

Thank you.