Manipuhaters (Season 1)

Manipulation is making me hate.

Welcome.

Hello.

The Stuck Stops here.

I'm Tammy Atman.

I'm LW No Lie,

And we are here for podcast number seven.

ManipuHaters.

ManipuHaters.

Don't you want to know how I came up with that?

I do,

Actually.

So manipulation is done because people hate themselves.

They hate the people they manipulate,

And the victims of manipulation end up hating the people that manipulate them,

As well as hating the fact that they're being manipulated.

That's a lot of hating.

Exactly.

That's why I did ManipuHaters.

So what made me think of manipulation and hate is what's going on on Thursday?

Thanksgiving.

Oy.

It's going to be peachy keen spending time with our toxic families.

For those of you who will feel mentally like that.

So the turkey and pie,

This podcast is for you.

I hate my fucking family.

All right.

Enough horsing around.

We got serious business to discuss here.

Nay.

Who invited that horse in here?

That's a lot of horseshit.

So manipulation.

I actually found a really good synonym for that,

Or a phrase,

Microaggressions.

And I like that because what these toxic parents do is tiny,

Repeated microaggressions for years,

Which are specifically designed to make you feel small in order to make them feel powerful.

And as a child,

Over year after year and aggression after aggression,

It's painful,

It's damaging,

And you always feel like you're wrong.

It's like a wearing down of your psyche.

That is absolutely true.

So let's talk about the ways parents manipulate.

So switching back and forth from verbal abuse to the silent treatment.

That's one way.

I think some kids would prefer the verbal abuse then to the silent treatment.

Yes.

We talked in the last episode,

The silent treatment is very marginalizing and ostracizing,

Which makes a child feel bullied.

It's terrible.

Then there's implicit threats and covert intimidation.

So if you're not physically abused and never have been physically abused,

There's that threat that's there that you better bend to the parental will,

Or you might be,

Even if it never happens.

And that feeling.

So there's fear,

There's ostracization.

Then another clever tactic is a diversion or evasion.

You're not responding directly to questions.

You go off on tangents.

You steer,

The parent will steer conversations away from anything that might make them look bad.

And of course,

Our favorite,

Denial.

That'll be podcast 52.

Denial.

The real problem is you.

You caused me to manipulate you,

Which is lovely.

And you will only receive love when you comply with the parent's wishes at all times.

It's like my way or highway.

Yep.

Do what I want or I won't love you.

And then even worse,

You feel guilt and shame for failing to live up to those manipulative expectations and demands.

It's another good one.

Empty words.

Luck is cheap.

They will,

It costs the manipulative parent nothing to talk about stuff that they don't believe.

I love you.

You're the light of my life.

They say that.

You're so important to me.

But there's no behavior to back it up,

Which further confuses the child because,

Well,

They said that I'm the light of their life.

But everything they're doing contradicts that.

So you question your own reality.

And the child might say,

What's wrong with me that I'm not feeling what they're telling me?

Right.

Absolutely.

And then there's financial manipulation too.

Spoiling the child and then telling them they're not grateful.

Or you shower them with gifts because you're not giving them anything else.

So you're trying to buy their silence.

Or you're going to accept me the way I am because I just gave you this,

This,

And that.

Also feel like it makes the child dependent on them and that they owe the parents something.

So they owe it to bow to their manipulation because they just gave a gift.

Yeah.

It reminds me of a time I was in a store.

It was like a big superstore.

And there was a kid with her parents.

And the kid was carrying this giant teddy bear,

Something she wanted.

And after the fact,

The parents said to her,

Well,

Now that we bought this for you're going to behave well,

Right?

You're going to be a good girl,

Right?

Because we bought you this toy.

And I thought to myself,

Oh my God,

That's going to crash and burn.

Oh,

I can only imagine what that's going to be like.

What happens when they have to buy them a BMW?

So those are some ways that they manipulate.

Now,

If you're wondering if you had controlling parents,

I have a list for that too.

One.

Over scrutinizing your eating,

Your parents,

Your hobbies,

Your social life.

Two.

Pressuring you with perfectionistic expectations or unattainable standards.

Three.

Forbade you from questioning or disagreeing with them.

Four.

Discouraged you from expressing anger,

Fear,

Or sadness around them.

Five.

Violated your privacy and boundaries.

My mother did that.

Six.

You had no say in household rules,

Responsibilities,

Or any decisions.

You just existed.

Seven.

They were unaware of the pain they caused you or unwilling to admit that they were wrong.

And eight.

They would switch back and forth from ignoring you or neglecting you to smothering and suffocating you.

From one extreme to the next.

Yes.

So you could see the ways you were manipulated,

The signs that are there.

So how many of these do you have to have to find out whether or not you had controlling parents?

It's not really how many.

How do you feel about yourself right now in your life?

If you're not happy or you're chronic or unfulfilled or chronically miserable or stressed out and empty,

This is one way of looking back and saying,

Okay,

Is this what's caused me?

I mean,

You're somebody that feels guilty all the time or you're a people pleaser or you're a rageaholic.

I was a former rageaholic.

Any of those,

This could be part of the reason why.

Everybody's different.

It's different.

Everybody's experiences are different.

But the toxicity and its effects are the same in that you're completely blocked from living an authentic life.

I found from my experience of dealing with people,

And again,

I'm not a licensed therapist or a life coach.

Neither.

But I found from my own experience talking to people that whenever somebody has these feelings of guilt or a lot of these negative feelings,

You can almost always trace it back to their childhood,

To their upbringing,

To their parents.

You don't all of a sudden,

Gee,

I'm 22 years old.

I'm going to start feeling guilty.

It really doesn't work that way.

It's learned crappy behavior.

I actually am going to put a couple of links to more information on this,

But one of them will be to this licensed marriage and family therapist who also wrote a book.

His name is Dan Newhart.

He's a popular speaker.

He's an educator.

He's a journalist.

And he specializes in helping adults cope with the challenges of unhealthy family narcissism and control and is the author of the best-selling If You Had Controlling Parents.

And he mentions two main personality types that he encounters in his practice.

Again,

I'm just relaying the information as I read it.

You need to do your own research and come to your own conclusions.

What do you think Dr.

Dan's Thanksgiving is going to look like?

Well,

It depends.

Did he fix his family?

Dr.

Dan,

I like that.

He might like that.

I'm going to call him.

So two main personality types he talks about.

The first is people who are drawn to order and control and are very uncomfortable with chaos.

Authoritarian moms and dads.

They are control freaks and it's almost impossible for them to let their children have the necessary independence to grow into their own being.

So their children cower and live in fear of parents like that.

And afraid to think for themselves and cannot.

Second personality disorder is narcissism.

Parents who are doing things because it's best for them and not because it's best for their children,

Which is,

You know,

That's what narcissism is.

It's all about me all the time.

And so that's,

You know,

When I link to the book,

You can definitely read up more on that.

I also wanted to discuss and I put this website that started in Britain.

So in 2017,

This website called My Hard Parent.

My Horrid Parent?

Horrid.

Yeah,

They like that word.

Horrid.

Almost as much as,

You know,

Crumpets.

Horrid.

H-O-R-R-I-D.

I'm going to put that in the link.

Forty-five thousand hits on the first day it launched.

Wow.

That's.

.

.

Yeah.

So if everyone thinks that they're the only ones,

Not.

.

.

You're not.

True.

Not true.

So what they found out after launching this website and studying the people and learning about the people visiting is how far into their adult lives that they're still oppressed by toxic parents.

So they were aiming it to the 18 to 23 year olds.

They were getting tons of people in their 40s,

Their 50s,

Their 60s,

And even their 70s saying that their parents are still controlling them and making their life a misery.

And that is tragic.

Wow.

So I almost think,

You know,

If they gear something like that towards 18 to 23 year olds,

Doesn't it take a little more time for people to sort of find the courage or the necessity to deal with these kinds of things?

Based.

.

.

Great question.

Based on my reading,

My research,

The 18 to 20s,

You know,

Or almost up until 30,

It really starts to surface.

But it almost services in a way of like rebellion.

Oh,

And rebellion,

Misery,

Poor choices.

But maybe you're not ready to say,

Wait a minute,

This is my parents or this is.

.

.

It stems back to my childhood.

I remember at that age,

Not even I was thinking rebellion,

But I don't remember even ever having an inclination that my parents might've been the cause.

Moving from the unconscious to the conscious.

And that is really hard to do unless you are actively getting therapy,

Doing your own reading to say,

What's going on with me?

What role am I playing and contributing to my own unhappiness and my own self-sabotage?

And that's,

You know,

And that's why you see all the time,

You know,

Oh,

The holidays,

You know,

You see,

You know,

What's that?

The artist,

Norman Rockwell,

Sorry,

Brain fart.

Norman Rockwell and it's the most wonderful time of the year.

No,

It's not.

No.

So everyone you're watching this,

You're being flooded with false joy and being told that it is culturally repulsive to disrespect and dislike your mother or your parents.

Honor thy mother and father.

So now you've got the culture telling you that you're wrong for feeling this way and you're being manipulated throughout the holidays and it becomes internalized just like the turkey and the tryptophan.

So you know,

We have a tongue in cheek song here that I'm hoping that when you are sitting there and all the games start,

That you look at it a little differently.

You hum this song when the crap starts,

The toxic behavior,

The manipulation,

The guilt trips.

Make this your mantra.

And you'll love this until you're on it.

My sister's wedding was a scary affair,

Her fiance looks like a ghostly bear.

Yeah,

He just visited me.

Look clouded Kavanaugh.

Should've feedback just to look at that because he drinks 1000 beers a week.

So I hate my fucking family.

Now,

Now,

Now,

Now,

Now,

Now,

Now,

Now.

Oh yeah!

That's rock and roll.

I hate my fucking family.

That's a bad word.

We gotta stop using bad words.

We are setting a terrible example.

No,

No.

I love the bad words.

Me too.

I wouldn't speak if there was no such thing as four-letter words.

We got a few five-letter words,

Three-letter words.

We got them all.

So,

Yes,

So let that song be your mantra.

Let it help you get through the holidays.

So victims of manipulation slash microaggression.

That would be me.

And maybe a lot of the listeners now.

Maybe almost everybody.

I don't know.

To some extent.

Right.

Again,

Everything's a spectrum.

We like to think that our kids won't be talking about this one day,

Right?

Oh my God.

They won't be victims of.

.

.

Then I will have really failed because I'm telling.

.

.

I did what I'm telling everybody not to do.

How stupid would that be?

Awareness is a beautiful thing.

Exactly.

So a lot of us victims of manipi-haters will have the following characteristics.

People pleasing and a burdening sense of responsibility.

Me!

Extreme compassion and empathy to the point of fatigue.

So are you saying like people will have empathy for other people,

For strangers or for.

.

.

To the point where it's unhealthy.

There's no boundaries.

So they'll just take it personally.

They'll take everything.

Almost take it personally.

Other people's problems.

Insert themselves into the problems.

Wow.

It fills a void.

That's a lack of boundaries,

Isn't it?

Yeah,

Total lack of boundaries.

That's podcast 67.

They tend to blame themselves for everything and feel pity,

Excessive pity for other people.

Wow.

And they avoid conflict using well-entrenched,

Automatic peacekeeping habits.

Okay,

What are those?

They don't even think like.

.

.

If somebody's violating your boundary or overly demanding or you want to say no and you don't because they're going to get mad,

So you sacrifice yourself to keep the peace,

Which is what you learn to do by being manipulated throughout your whole childhood.

Right.

So being that yes girl,

Yes boy,

Yes person,

Whenever there's conflict or to avoid conflict,

It'll make you sick.

Make you sick.

Wow.

I remember as a kid feeling like I needed everybody to like me.

It was the worst.

I just remember it was so.

.

.

I felt so powerless because you can't control everybody.

And I just wanted everybody to like me and it bothered me if somebody didn't.

And that was.

.

.

Thank God I don't feel that way anymore.

You can all go fuck yourselves.

Well,

I hate you.

And I'm okay with that.

I'm totally okay.

So yeah,

Everyone wants.

.

.

I guess people want to be liked,

But what we lose sight of is we should rather be disliked for being real than liked for being fake.

It's true.

And what does it matter if everybody likes you?

I mean,

Everybody's got things going on in their lives.

Maybe they don't relate.

Maybe they don't care.

Like,

Why does it matter?

Oh,

100%.

I have people.

.

.

You lose contact and some people actually don't care.

Yeah.

All right.

That doesn't.

.

.

Just because they don't see your value doesn't mean you don't have value.

Absolutely.

And that's where a lot of those internalized negative messages become automatic.

Well,

If they don't like me,

There's something wrong with me.

If I don't bend to my parents' will,

There's something wrong with me.

If I don't make everybody happy,

There's something wrong with me.

And so,

Again,

External based living.

I think the reason why I went into music was because I wanted people to like me.

I just needed an audience and I wanted people to like me.

And on some level,

That's okay.

There's nothing.

.

.

It's when you.

.

.

Isn't it unhealthy,

Though,

To need that much attention?

Depends on the spectrum.

You know,

The performers like to perform for a reason.

They want to entertain people.

They want people to like the entertainment.

That's okay.

If it's naturally who they are.

If you're sacrificing your soul and your happiness and your ability to be authentic in order to get people to like you,

That's where it's not working.

Took me a long time to figure that out.

Way too long.

You know,

A couple other.

.

.

Again,

You take everything personally.

You have a lot of self-doubt and low self-esteem.

Oh,

And the fear of abandonment and anger.

That's right.

I used to be afraid of my own rage.

Because it was always sitting there.

And it would eventually seep out in all the wrong ways.

What were you afraid would happen?

Honestly,

I would be so afraid that I would get so angry that I would never stop being angry.

That it would become this rage.

And expressing that rage would never stop.

Wow.

So you were afraid you couldn't control it?

Like at some point if you let it out,

It would just.

.

.

Consume me to the point of somehow losing myself in oblivion.

Wow.

So I just kept pushing it down,

Pushing it down.

Because I was never raised to talk about things.

You know,

My oldest daughter called me the other day.

She was having a problem at work.

And there was a miserable co-worker who likes to complain about everything and everybody.

And demanded a meeting.

And she was like,

Didn't sleep.

And I was like,

Well,

Why didn't you sleep?

She's going to tell my boss that it's my fault.

That I didn't do what I was supposed to do.

I go,

Is it true?

No.

It's not true.

What did your boss say about this?

He's like,

Oh,

We have to meet with her and just appease her because this is what she likes to do.

So the boss knows her M.

O.

So the boss knows that her M.

O.

And knows that you have done your job.

Yeah.

So why are you worried?

Because what if he believes her?

I was like,

Doesn't sound like it.

But she got it off her chest.

She's allowed to feel that way.

So maybe she had like an irrational fear,

But she was able to talk to you about it.

And feel better.

And that's now think about if you feel that way at three and four and five and nine and 12 and 18 and 21,

And you never get it off your chest and you never find a way to express it and then make sense of it.

Where does that go?

It's festers like lava.

Wow.

So,

Again,

Being a victim of manipulators.

It compromises your sense of integrity and self-esteem question,

Question your own reality,

And it leads to chronic negative and distorted thinking about who you are and how you see relationships.

And then you end up feeling isolated and experiencing extreme loneliness,

Which can eventually contribute to anxiety and depression.

Oh,

No.

Yes,

It's true.

I had both as a result of being a victim of chronic microaggression.

So what type of parents are emotional manipulators?

There's a lot of room for to expand on that.

But I can describe my parents as having you know,

They were toxic,

Toxically self-centered.

They were all three of them were anger,

Intense anger.

They were afraid of abandonment.

You know,

I don't know about my stepdad.

My mom and my dad definitely had a fear of abandonment,

Chronic rage,

Chronic anger.

And in your book,

You mentioned that it goes back a bunch of generations where they all kind of grew up with this fear of abandonment.

Great segue.

Thank you.

How much is a segue?

Two pounds.

So,

Yes,

And that's one of the other things that can help you is to understand why your parents are treating you the way they are.

So oversimplification.

Okay,

I know they're narcissistic.

I know that they're manipulative.

I know they're controlling.

I know they like guilt trips.

Whatever it is that you discover.

Well,

Then let's look at why.

And when I looked at why,

I'm able to accept that they had the limitations that they did.

I'm able to accept that going back to the late 1800s,

Very late 1800s,

The problems started there and just never went away.

You know,

I talk I think I've mentioned the invisible scar,

You know,

That it goes through generation to generation.

I could call it an invisible virus.

It just gets passed down until somebody decides that they've had enough,

Which was me.

When you're an adult and you are able to look at your parents as people,

Not as like the almighty or the all-knowing,

But you actually see them as flawed people and people who have probably suffered similar circumstances.

I think it helps.

It helps to feel empowered and to not feel so powerless when you're with them,

Like especially,

You know,

Holiday time.

You're going home and you don't live at home,

But you're going home for the holidays and you're going to have to deal with those people.

So it's great to feel empowered and see yourself on a different level rather than being this like little hurt child.

When you are raised in a toxic environment,

And it's a great point you bring up,

You develop survival strategies.

And what happens with those survival strategies is as an adult,

They don't work.

So the consequences of these survival strategies,

Which you learned in childhood and you now carry into adulthood,

May look like this.

You're a perfectionist.

You're isolated.

You're never satisfied with your accomplishments.

Me,

Me,

Me,

Me.

You're intimidated and or defensive around controlling authoritative people.

Me,

Me,

Me,

Me,

Me.

You confuse love with pity and you become a rescuer,

A rescuer in all of your relationships in order to feel important.

You find it hard to relax,

To laugh or be spontaneous.

You're sort of controlling yourself.

Yeah.

Me,

Me,

Me,

Me,

Me.

You expect people to hurt,

To judge or take advantage of you.

So you're constantly on the defensive because that's what happened.

That's what you know.

And you also can become an approval.

An excitement and an achievement junkie.

That would be me.

Also,

A lot of me's.

So it sounds like a lot of these behaviors are some of them are for like this momentary feeling of normalcy.

You know,

Like if you're if you're like an achievement junkie,

Let's say an approval junkie,

Like when you get that approval from somebody,

It gives you like a moment of feeling like you might have felt had you not grown up with toxic parents.

I would like.

Yes.

And that moment,

Again,

We talk about micro moments a lot.

I wouldn't say it's it's gives you a moment of normalcy.

It gives you a moment of not feeling so empty.

We talked about the bucket with a hole in it.

The problem is it only lasts a moment.

Remember the last podcast you talked about?

Oh,

You did this.

You accomplished that.

And how much satisfaction you get from it.

I said three point two seconds.

Right.

So that's so I like to I mean,

No disrespect to people with drug addiction or drug problems.

So that's not my intention.

But I would say these being a perfectionist,

Being a achievement junkie and being defensive and having a hard to laugh,

Finding it hard to laugh isn't is an addiction.

It's your drug.

It's that to take the pain away and stop feeling so empty.

It is all these survival strategies are a drug.

That's how I see it.

And I repeat,

This is no disrespect to people who have drug issues or are familiar with it.

That's not what I'm saying.

But if we look at our survival strategy strategies and distorted behavior as a drug,

Like I got to get off that drug,

It's it's not helping me.

Right.

So odd as victims of toxic manipulation.

You end up respond.

I ended up responding to everything with self-doubt,

Self-blame and always being wrong.

Everything.

So.

So where was your confidence?

In the toilet.

You don't have any.

You know,

There's no if you can't relax and have fun and be authentic,

Where's your confidence?

Everything is,

You know,

A hyper reaction.

You're either hyper reacting or you're being hyper vigilant.

You're scanning your life on a minute by minute basis for threats,

For ways to make it less painful.

It's like you're at war all the time.

You can't relax.

You're on your guard.

I'd say I fight battle.

That's why I always say every day was bad.

I just had good moments because even if you temporarily win a battle,

You'll still have a war.

Right.

And I had to find a way to stop fighting that internal war.

So.

So what gives us an opportunity to break that cycle?

Great question.

You know,

For me and everybody's different.

Once I realized,

You know,

Where all this chronic shame was coming from.

From being manipulated,

Controlled,

Emotionally abused,

Abandoned physically and emotionally.

I realized I had created a false self that was not based in reality.

I was still using unhealthy survival strategies as an adult.

And once I realized it was them and their parents and the people,

You know,

In the generations before them and not me.

I felt many things.

A sense of relief.

A big,

Huge boulder off my shoulder.

And I started to look at things with clarity as to what they really are.

And what's really happening and not,

Well,

What's this doing to me?

Nothing's doing anything to you.

You have assigned labels to things because that's how you were raised.

Everything,

You know,

Is a label.

My good or my bad.

And that's sometimes things just are.

And they always talk about being balanced,

You know,

In Zen and again,

You know,

Hippie dippie doo da terms.

I know that.

I get it.

But balanced means.

Instead of getting,

You know,

Somebody cut you off in traffic.

Instead of being at an enraged 15,

You're at an annoyed four.

It doesn't go away.

You know,

When your spouse or your significant other or your friend.

Does something that.

Annoys you,

You don't like or hurt you.

You approach it in a way that it's not intentional.

It was accidental.

It's maybe not out to get.

Maybe they're not out to get me.

So that's a more mindful approach.

Being more mindful about what you're feeling and why you're feeling it.

Yeah,

I was somebody else was talking about.

They were so angry that,

You know,

This this friend stopped talking to them.

You know,

Did you ever ask why?

No.

So you just got mad.

Yeah.

They were almost afraid to have,

Say,

If it meant that much to you,

Make the phone call and have that heart to heart.

Right.

But just to get mad.

That's a knee jerk reaction.

And it's and it fester.

And I understand people are hurt.

I get it.

You know,

That's I'm not disputing the hurt.

But maybe if you dig deep to see,

You know,

Become aware of where that hurt comes from,

Maybe you'll see it has nothing to do with that disappointment of that friend.

Maybe there's something deeper behind there that's causing you to feel this level of hurt.

I can't remember the last time I felt that level of rage.

Yes.

Well,

For me,

It was five and five years ago,

Probably almost to the day.

No,

But yes.

But what happens is they're rejecting me.

They're hurting me.

I'm important.

How do they not know that I'm not important?

Maybe they don't think you're important.

Their loss.

Most people that,

You know,

I talk to,

I'm like,

Wow,

You got a lot to offer.

You're you're really fun.

You're smart.

You're great to be with.

Just because,

You know,

You're not for everybody,

Though.

You know,

For everybody.

Like me as a kid,

You can't be all things to everybody.

And if you try,

It's exhausting.

Why do I want to please everybody?

Well,

We just talked about it.

It's exhausting.

That's why.

That's right.

So it's we mentioned self-awareness.

And we mentioned,

You know,

Breaking the cycle.

And those are simple words.

And it's not simple.

It's not.

It's not.

So when you think about people.

Manipulating you make it to change it to they're trying to manipulate you.

Only you give them the power to succeed.

So when you're sitting around the Thanksgiving table with some people who you may hate.

What do you think about?

Well,

First,

The song,

The song.

That's number one.

Number two is.

There's a hate inside of them to want to do that.

To force you to do something to bend to their will.

There you become an outside observer rather than be letting it internalize you.

Can you just like observe the.

The living inside out.

Helps you to become an outside observer because you depersonalize the experiences going on around you.

And it becomes well,

They're the ones with the problem.

I haven't done anything wrong.

I haven't.

You know,

I've.

If you've genuinely done the best that you could.

You know,

You bring again a benign random examples.

You bring up flowers over to whoever's house.

Doesn't matter who it is.

A relative.

And somebody else brings a bigger.

OK.

And they've fought all over that as a way to make you feel bad for not getting as big a bouquet.

Should I leave right now?

Right then and.

If these are the types of people you're hanging out with.

Right.

So.

What do you do?

Pour some beer into the bigger bouquet.

Get the bigger bouquet drunk.

I don't know.

I'm I'm babbling.

But so now they're you're going to get mad.

Without awareness,

You're going to take all that personally.

Well,

Unless you can recognize that their behavior is ridiculous.

How are you going to do that?

Awareness,

Awareness.

Think about us.

This stuff stops here and our songs to sing to yourself over and over again.

That's right.

This will get you through the holidays.

And I have websites to everything that is two websites I have in the notes to everything we discussed today.

And what do we got next week?

Oh,

Next week we have a special episode of the stock stops here.

We are going to be interviewing a real life coach and should be super fun and interesting.

She specializes in,

You know,

Dealing with toxic parents.

That's her specialty.

Yes.

I think she calls herself Reiki Rita Reiki Rita.

So we're going to have her on.

And she's got some great resources on her website.

Yes.

We're having her on to talk about navigating the rest of the holidays.

Right.

We're getting you through Thanksgiving.

New Year's.

Yeah.

We're getting you through Thanksgiving with,

You know,

Bad words and silly songs.

She's actually going to have some real tools.

Yeah.

She's bringing her tool belt.

She's like the mature one.

Let's hope we'll find out.

So stay tuned for next time when we interview Reiki Rita and we will see you and speak to you after Thanksgiving.

Have a happy Thanksgiving,

Everybody.

Hope you get through it with a little help from your friends,

Tammy Atman and L.

W.

No lie.

We will talk to you soon.

Say goodbye,

Tammy.

My father in law has a gambling addiction.

My brother in law just got his third conviction.

Want to know about my holiday prediction?

There will be a food fight and a massive eviction.

My sister in law has no idea why her dates run from the door.

A strange thing is that you as a total bore.

Don't go away.

Cause I got plenty more.

I hate my fucking family.

Get me out of this dysfunctional tree.

My parents are crazy and they don't like me.

So I hate my fucking family.

My cousin's wife is a total bitch.

She married my cousin,

But with one little hitch.

They must live like they are really rich.

He gets sex,

She gets cash.

Ain't that a switch?

Cause now you all know why I need therapy.

It's not my fault they're all fucking crazy.

Of course I think nobody is as perfect as me.

As I add some Prozac to my glasses chaffing.

I hate my fucking family.

Get me out of this dysfunctional tree.

My parents are crazy and they don't like me.

So I hate my fucking family.

I hate my fucking family.