What Happens When You Appreciate What You Have -Live 1-14-26

Because there's some things that I want to do today,

Together,

And they all center around this idea that in the modern world we have been trained,

Truly trained,

To focus on what we don't have,

To focus on what's coming next,

To focus on what we need that's not in our current present moment.

And there is a real problem with that.

Because at first,

At first,

And I'm very aware of this spending most of my life as some form of high achiever,

Type A,

Get things done,

Chase the next dream.

At first,

When you focus on what you lack and you convince yourself,

Whether you realize it or not,

That you're in danger because you do not have this thing.

When that happens,

Your body starts releasing stress and energy.

There are threats and smitters to say,

I'm in danger,

I need to do something about it,

I need to solve it,

And I'm gonna have the energy to do it.

Which is a quick fix.

It's a quick idea to go try to get what you're looking for.

And in short bursts,

It makes a lot of sense.

If you're in an emergency,

Then yes,

Flood me with adrenaline,

Flood me with cortisol,

Narrow me on the emergency,

And let's get this solved.

Let's figure this out.

If you're in a life-or-death situation,

Or a major collapse,

Or something that needs to be done now,

Or ideally 10 minutes ago,

That works.

But it doesn't work in the long term.

Because over the long term,

When you are in that state of narrowed focus,

One,

Your body starts to degrade.

Because it's not built to be in that high adrenaline,

High cortisol state for an extended period of time.

It's an emergency mode where maintenance,

Rest,

And digestion don't happen.

Which unfortunately explains the health of a lot of the modern world.

Because if you are perpetually in a state of fight-or- flight in your nervous system,

Your body doesn't rest,

It doesn't digest,

And it doesn't heal.

And if you think of most of these modern diseases and problems,

They all pretty much stem from a lack of rest,

A lack of digestion,

And a lack of your body's ability to heal.

Despite this,

Most of us believe that it works,

That we need to keep focusing on what we don't have,

What doesn't exist yet,

What's missing,

What we needed to have in our life and do not already have.

But from my own personal experience,

You can only do that so long before you end up tired.

Not just tired,

Exhausted.

And also frustrated and disappointed,

Disillusioned,

And feeling incapable.

Because at first,

Someone gave you the energy to push a boulder.

But then,

As you started to push these things in your life,

To make these happen.

Whether it's surviving an uncomfortable relationship,

Whether it's making things work at work,

Whether it's saving enough money to survive,

Whether it's anything.

But eventually,

If you don't rest,

If you don't relax,

If you don't appreciate what you have done,

What you have gotten,

And give yourself a moment to say,

It's working.

I'm enjoying this.

I have a life.

Most of the things in my life are already working,

And I'm sure I'll figure out this other thing along the way.

But it doesn't mean that I can't enjoy my life now.

If you're not doing that,

It starts to feel hopeless.

It starts to feel useless.

Because you're not actually enjoying your life.

You're constantly focusing on a future when all of the problems will be solved,

And then you'll be able to enjoy it.

Does that make sense to everyone?

Because this modern story gets in the way of everything,

And everyone.

And I see it.

I thought that it was simply me being super type A,

High achieving,

Running a business,

Piecing things together.

I thought it was my peer group.

But it's everywhere.

You see parents focusing that when their kids are this in school,

When things are going to be done.

You see people at the job when they've saved this amount of money.

You see people in a relationship saying when we finally get married.

You see people postponing enjoyment into the future.

You see people saying,

When I am fit,

When I am my ideal weight,

When I am this rich,

When I have my healthy relationship,

When my house is clean,

When this,

We create all of this criteria,

All of these things that need to happen in order for us to be happy,

In order for us to enjoy.

And underneath it all is the most toxic lie of the modern world.

And it gets reinforced by our body,

Which is,

If I allow myself to rest and appreciate,

Then I'll lose my drive.

I'll go soft.

I won't actually accomplish my dreams.

I won't get anything done.

I won't matter.

How many people have heard some form of just relax and it's like I can't relax.

X won't happen.

I won't achieve this.

I won't get there.

If these things happen.

If I allow myself to appreciate.

I know that was me too.

And I actually work with quite a few entrepreneurs who tell me the same thing.

They even avoid meditation.

So you're multiple steps ahead because they think it's going to make them lose their edge.

But this is the problem.

When you don't appreciate what you have.

Eventually,

You don't enjoy it.

You lose the ability to enjoy the things in your present moment.

And then you lose your drive to do anything.

Because the only reason and this is an important point.

The only reason we do anything is for the feeling.

For the feeling of experiencing it.

The only reason beginner meditators meditate is because someone told them that it's going to relieve their stress,

It's going to improve their sleep,

It's going to make them more creative,

It's going to make them more productive.

And they're searching and seeking a feeling,

A reward.

They're searching for a carrot.

But if you always are holding a carrot in front of yourself,

And you never allow yourself to actually eat the carrot to experience the reward,

Eventually,

You're going to lose the motivation to run.

So I'm going to tell you from personal experience before we get into the exercises.

The real goal is that when you allow yourself to experience and enjoy the life you already have,

Two things happen.

Two really important things happen.

One,

The goals you have that are unnecessary,

Absolutely unnecessary disappear.

So what do I mean by that?

Maybe you have been chasing a certain amount of money in order to feel safe and secure.

And if you can give yourself safety and security by noticing and appreciating the resources you already have around you,

The relationships that support you,

The people who are there for you,

Then you don't really need to chase the money,

Do you?

Because you already feel safe and secure now.

So yes,

If you're chasing something to receive something you can give yourself today,

When you give it to yourself,

You will lose that motivation.

And that's totally okay.

That's a shortcut.

That's working smarter,

Not harder.

But then the second thing will happen.

When you allow yourself to truly,

Truly,

Truly enjoy and appreciate the things you have in your life,

Then you get so much more inspiration,

Energy and motivation to have more of what matters.

So let's say you're seeking connection in your life,

And you've been seeking it in 100 different ways.

When you allow yourself to notice and appreciate the connection you already have,

To bask in it,

To be supported by it,

Then you get a lot of motivation to go get it.

Even if that connection requires being a little vulnerable,

Being a little awkward,

Taking a risk,

You'll go for it,

Because you know how good it feels.

You know how wonderful it feels.

If you're searching for an intimate relationship,

You might allow yourself to enjoy the relationships you do have to the fullest.

And that's going to give you the motivation to do the scary,

Awkward,

Uncertain,

Vulnerable parts of getting a relationship.

So in essence,

The more that you allow yourself to enjoy the life you already have,

Two great things happen,

Although they don't seem great in the beginning.

One,

You lose useless goals.

And that's most of what the modern world sells us.

You lose the goal to have the fancy car.

You lose the need to have the big house.

You lose the need to be famous or important just to be famous or important in order to be liked.

You lose all of the things that you see on TV.

You lose every single one of them for the reasons you had them.

And then you gain the motivation and inspiration to do the things that really matter.

Connection,

Love,

Peace,

Joy,

Growth,

Contribution.

Because when you allow yourself to feel peace,

You will defend your peace at all costs.

One of the best ways to convince yourself to set boundaries is to allow yourself to feel how good it feels when you have set boundaries that protect your peace and to feel the peace,

Because it'll give you the courage to do the scary part.

So I'm going to take some time for questions.

But then we're going to have the entire rest of the class,

We'll be practicing this.

We'll be practicing how to enjoy the thing we want most in our life,

And that we already have.

Because maybe I'm dreaming of connection.

And I'm going to sit in connection.

Maybe I want peace.

And I'm going to start sitting in all the areas of my life where I already have peace.

Maybe I do want financial security.

I'm going to sit in all of the areas of my life where I already do have security,

The amount that I do.

So that's the practice for today.

But with that,

Any questions before we dive in?

Anybody confused or uncertain?

And of course,

If anybody is new and can't make it the whole time,

Before we jump in,

Would love a follow or anything else.

But just wanted to make sure to pause for questions.