So taking a nice deep breath in,
Breathing out,
Gently closing your eyes and we'll begin this practice with a self hug.
In fact I think every meditation should begin in this way.
So if it's comfortable to do so,
Take your right hand and put it on your left shoulder.
Take your left hand and put it on your right shoulder and massage your shoulders for a moment.
Then take a deep breath in,
Breathe out.
And as you breathe out,
Push yourself down into the ground,
Pushing your shoulders down.
And you can do a side hug too if you want to.
So just moving your hands down to your sides and placing both your hands round to your shoulder blades on each side.
Bringing them to a place that feels comfortable and giving yourself a good squeeze.
Gently opening your arms up and bringing them down to a comfortable position.
And however you are right now,
Giving yourself permission to be that way.
So when we sit to meditate,
All the things that are going on for us seem more vivid and a bit more intense.
So we must begin with kindness as we can feel a bit bombarded by life.
So noticing how you are and giving yourself permission to feel how you feel.
And then feeling your way into that sense of self.
Noticing the character that you're playing today.
Are you feeling like a troubled soul?
Or perhaps fragmented or lost?
Or maybe joyful to be sitting here?
Noticing where your inner voice is.
What's the temperature of your inner voice?
Is it shouting out?
Or is it whispering something to you?
Maybe it's being kind today,
Leaving you alone.
So notice how those thoughts,
That voice feels.
Feeling your thoughts.
Feeling your feelings.
And we all hold our vulnerabilities.
They sit underneath the shell we often wear for others in everyday life.
And we often wear it for ourselves too.
But this vulnerability needs to be felt.
It needs to be heard.
And it needs to be healed.
And our ego is really our vulnerable self in disguise.
Wanting to prove something.
To be more.
To do life better.
And knowing that there is something deeper underneath this.
Our sense of being that can hold that vulnerable one.
It can hold anything.
So as you sit here,
Breathing,
Listening to that vulnerable self right now.
Noticing where it appears.
Perhaps in your body,
As a sensation.
Perhaps as a story.
Perhaps as a general feeling.
And getting as close to it as you feel is comfortable.
And you can ask your vulnerable self what it needs.
Maybe there's part of you that feels sadness,
Some shame,
A longing.
Perhaps there's a story that things didn't go quite right.
Or that life has been a struggle.
And you're here because you were there.
And you don't want to be here.
There should be more than this.
And our vulnerable self is created from our life.
From our past.
And we carry it forward in our thoughts and our feelings.
In our body.
And they often come up when we're triggered in life.
And really it's a call to be heard and listened to.
There are parts of you that have been hurt and need your kindness.
So right now,
You can say to your vulnerable self,
No matter what's happening right now,
You can be still.
Allowing your vulnerable self to find its stillness.
And you can be still.
Just your body rising and falling as you breathe.
Being the stillness of the sky as clouds gently move through you.
So sitting and breathing,
Offering stillness to your vulnerable self.
Offering it space.
And this space allows the light to reach the deepest darkest places of you.
Your whole body being filled with light.
And this light holds your vulnerability.
Just sitting and breathing.
Allowing your wise knowing self to shine through.
You are not two,
You are one.
Your ego,
Your vulnerable self,
It's part of you.
And it can be met and understood.
It can be seen and it can be heard.
It may feel like it has hard edges to it,
But offering some stillness,
Some space,
Some light,
It will soften when it's ready.
You are this beautiful awareness that can hold it all.
You can be your own inner alchemist.
Transforming it all into space.
And gently expanding your awareness outwards now.
Noticing the sounds around you.
A sense of your body in the room.
The light through your eyelids.
And very gently taking a deep breath in.
Breathing out.
And gently opening your eyes.