Greetings.
If you would like to take notes during this meditation,
I encourage you to pause,
Grab a pen and paper or some medium that won't talk back to you if you can.
We want to stay in this present moment as much as possible.
We recognize that feelings and sensations can dull with time and when another hard time comes,
I hope this meditation and reflection can serve as a small piece of your navigation kit.
As Adrienne Mabry Brown says,
Our temporary and cyclical work is to notice what is broken,
Clean up the dangerous fragments of the past and let them go or remake them into something beautiful and then begin again.
If you're able,
I invite you to lay down on your back.
Close your eyes or soften your gaze.
Notice the parts of your body resting against the earth or some other surface.
Notice the parts of you facing towards the ceiling or sky.
You might take note of any feelings or sensations you may be arriving with and where they are landing in your body.
As you breathe,
Start to notice the quality of your breath.
No need to change it,
Just notice.
Notice the temperature of the air as it enters your nostrils,
The temperature as it leaves.
Is your breath shallow or deep?
Does your breath live in your chest,
Your ribcage,
Front or back body?
Take another three rounds just to notice your breath as it is.
I invite you to bring one hand or both hands to your belly.
Let's breathe in for four,
Three,
Two,
One.
Breathe out,
Three,
Two,
One.
Breathe in,
Another in and out.
Starting to return to a more natural breath.
I invite you to return to this grounding breath if you start to feel a sense of overwhelm during the meditation.
You're in control of how much you lean into this meditation,
But if feelings of overwhelm are also paired with multiple identities of privilege,
I do encourage you to practice staying with the discomfort.
As Michelle Cassandra Johnson says,
The only way out is through by way of the feelings.
As you breathe in,
Reach your shoulders up towards your ears and as you breathe out,
Gently press them away.
Soften your jaw and let your tongue fall away from the roof of your mouth.
Here you might take note of any feelings or sensations that are present for you in this present moment.
I invite you to bring to mind where you were when you heard this hard news.
Who was around you?
Are there any sounds you can recall?
What was the quality of light?
Any taste in your mouth?
Consider what was the first emotion to wash over you?
What color is that wave?
Did it start as a ripple or a typhoon?
Did you feel drawn to ride the wave,
Submerge,
Seek shelter,
Or something else?
Notice any feelings or sensations that are currently arising for you.
After that first wave receded,
What emotion was left on the shores of your heart?
What does that emotion look like?
Does it sparkle or reflect?
Is it monotone or dull?
Is it one large thing or small scattered across your heart?
What does that emotion feel like?
Jagged?
Sticky?
Malleable?
Does it smell pungent?
Sharp?
Sickly sweet?
Fresh or familiar?
Does it taste sour?
Bitter?
Spicy?
Overwhelming or underwhelming?
What does this emotion sound like?
A creak?
A howl?
A whisper?
As you stay with this emotion,
Notice how your body is responding to it.
Do you want to curl in?
Brace yourself?
Soften?
Let's take five rounds of breath to stay here,
Each exhale sending your warming breath to this emotion,
Melting a little more with each breath out.
Notice any shifts with that emotion or your reaction to it.
As you breathe in,
Can you imagine taking in the cleansing salt of the vast ocean?
The waves pull towards you once again,
And you are reminded of that hard thing.
As the ocean's waves cover your heart,
Breathe out,
Allowing that melted emotion to mix with the water.
It is not gone,
But transformed.
As the waves recede again,
Notice what emotion comes next for you.
What does it look like?
What does it feel like?
How does it smell?
What do you hear?
As you stay with this second emotion that you have visualized,
Felt,
Smelt,
Tasted,
And listened to,
How does your body respond to it?
Let's take five more rounds of breath to stay here,
Each exhale sending your warming breath to this emotion,
Melting a little more with each breath out.
Notice any shifts with that emotion or your reaction to it.
You may pause here and repeat that portion of this visualization exercise as much as you want or need to.
Sometimes we think we have made peace with something and yet a sharp memory returns,
The same emotions washing over us like it just happened.
Sometimes our struggle,
Whether we have chosen it or it has chosen us,
Makes us very good swimmers.
You may not control all the events that happen to you,
But you can decide not to be reduced by them.
Maya Angelou.
My wish for you is that you may find both reflection and rest on the shores of your heart,
Finding solace in the recognition that you are not alone.
Thank you.
