The Natural State Of Love: Working With Fear And Anxiety

So tonight is going to be a different kind of energy that we'll be playing with.

It's always love energy,

But how we get there can be very different.

And tonight it feels very primal,

Very in touch with our creative energies.

You know,

The natural state of being,

Which we're in at all times,

And that our natural state is love.

So we'll go ahead and start our breathing in together,

Just breathing in.

And letting go of wherever our mind is.

Our mind's always telling us,

You know,

I need to be this way,

I need to be that way.

Or,

You know,

I just finished doing such and such,

I'm not prepared.

Or I can't join in because,

You know,

I just finished having an argument.

Or I just finished,

You know,

Fooling around with somebody and I can't be here and present and all that sort of stuff.

And you know what,

Our minds have nothing to do with our preparation,

With our joining this natural state of love that we all are at all times.

So let's breathe together.

And joyfully ignore all the voices in our head.

Just breathing in.

And knowing that we cannot get this wrong.

I cannot screw this up.

I can try,

But I can't really screw it up.

I don't have to be perfect.

I don't have to be right.

I just need to be present to showing up,

To being here.

And the being here isn't being at a particular event.

It's not being at just the right place and time.

It's being exactly where you are.

If your car broke down and you couldn't make it someplace,

Or if your technology wasn't functioning and you couldn't get online,

Or if you couldn't go to a particular event,

None of that matters.

It's being present to wherever you are.

Because wherever that space is,

That space where you are,

Is the most important place that the universe can be through you.

It's not where you're going.

You hold it.

You hold the keys to the universe expressing through you.

Anything,

Anywhere you've got to be,

Anybody else,

That's them and that's the universe through them.

You can't express through another person.

And you don't need anybody else.

It's your expression through you.

So wherever you are is exactly where you're supposed to be.

No matter how frustrating it may feel.

No matter how it wasn't quite where you thought you were going to be.

That's the place to be.

So right now,

Wherever you are,

Feeling into your natural state,

The only way the universe can be present is if you are.

That's how important you being aware of you is.

And even though it's important,

It doesn't have to be a struggle.

It doesn't have to be complicated.

It doesn't have to be,

Oh my gosh,

I didn't get it right.

Anytime that you forget,

It's okay.

Because the moment you remember,

It resets the clock and the universe is there.

We may get caught up in what's happening,

An argument,

A moment,

No matter what.

And then we remember,

Oh man,

That's me,

I'm getting caught up.

And in that moment,

The universe learns what catches it,

Where it was.

And then it can turn that around.

And it can be present to whatever's happening.

Doesn't mean that whatever's happening is going to be pleasant,

That you're going to like it,

Or that it's even going to be the truth.

You know,

We're so inundated right now with media telling,

This person's this way and this person's that way,

And this is how this person meant something,

And oh,

You know,

Here's this coming in.

And how do you know the truth when all of that,

Coming from so many directions,

Contradicting itself?

We have to go back to knowing our own experience,

Being present to ourselves,

And being understanding and aware and loving of ourselves at all points in time.

It's like,

We're more present than we think.

When we look out at family or friends,

Sometimes we're sitting at a table and everybody's eating,

And you just for a moment go,

God,

This is the greatest thing,

This is the most wonderful thing.

I really love being with them.

This is the best moment,

It's the perfect day.

Enjoy those moments,

Because those days are when we've been so present,

So real,

So alive.

Presence isn't always what we imagine it to be spiritually,

Right?

Like,

If I'm spiritually present,

Then I'll,

You know,

I don't know,

I'll see energy,

I'll see things different,

Things will be coming,

You know,

What do we imagine that being present is?

It's a natural state.

It's relaxed.

So when you are relaxed,

When you're not self-editing,

Not listening to self-talk,

Just enjoy the moment that you're in,

Not wishing it to be different,

No matter what it's showing you.

That's being present.

That's the natural state.

And those happen more often than we think.

And they don't have to be so structured.

So together,

Let's enjoy our natural state right now.

Just breathing in,

That wherever you are,

It's a perfect place to be.

Whoever you're with,

Even if they're across the room,

Watching something else while you're watching another thing.

Maybe they're on their phone,

Maybe they're watching TV.

Maybe you see them in a different room,

While you're over here listening to something.

You're just present to the fact that they're in the space with you.

Breathing in and out,

In the relaxation,

The unencumbered,

The unencumbered relaxation.

No expectations of things being a particular way.

That whatever is,

Is perfect.

Just being there,

Present to it.

And letting the creative energy in your body rise.

Let it come up from your root chakra,

Rise up through your body,

And join your heart.

Bringing in the energy from outside and above your head,

And joining that to your heart.

Just being present,

Knowing that this moment is perfect as it is.

It doesn't have to be special.

It doesn't have to include anyone else.

Because everything's included within you.

When you are peaceful and joined with yourself,

You're not separate from anyone.

So no one needs to join you in this space.

Because you're creating the space that everyone's in with you already.

And you're just holding that.

And it's easy.

You're just breathing in and breathing out.

There's nothing to achieve in this space.

So perfectly lovely,

And silent,

And present,

And alive.

There's nothing to be done.

There's no place in you that you have to heal.

No way of thinking that you need to address.

Isn't it amazing that you can be perfectly whole as soon as you recognize it?

And you can choose,

Maybe I'll heal something.

But why not just enjoy the perfect essence of yourself?

The part of you that's okay with you,

And your neurosis,

Your childhood wounds.

You don't have to do everything for all of those.

You're the space that they can exist in and be loved.

Just loving all parts of you.

Not having to pick it apart.

Just loving it.

It's like walking through a park,

And you're breathing in,

And you feel the sun on your body.

Or it could be the rain.

Either one.

See,

It doesn't have to be a particular way.

It can be sun,

Or it can be rain,

And you can be happy.

It doesn't matter.

It's not your outside circumstances.

Either you're walking through a park and it's sunny,

Or you're walking through a park and it's rainy.

It doesn't matter.

As you imagine you're doing that,

You pass by your childhood self,

And you see it's crying over a wound that it's had.

Then you don't have to fix everything about it.

Because as you walk past it,

Your hand gracefully plays with that child's hair,

And wipes away its tear,

Gives it a smooch.

And then that child watches you,

Enjoying whether it's rainy or sunny.

And that child knows,

I can do that too.

So you're leading you at all points in time.

You're teaching everything in your existence how to love what is,

And how to love itself.

That's your natural state.

To love no matter what is happening,

And to love you in that state.

Notice I didn't say anything beyond that.

If you love you,

No matter what's happening,

No matter what your experience is,

If you love you,

Are kind to you,

Are aware of you,

Nothing else is required.

What about somebody else in that?

What about their experience?

It's not under your control.

So you love you.

And then that teaches everything inside of you to love itself,

No matter its experience.

That it can be happy in sunshine or in rain.

That things don't have to be perfect,

Because the natural state is balance.

Your natural way of being is completely in balance.

Things don't have to be perfect for you,

Because you are the perfection.

Because isn't it perfect that whether things are good or bad,

That you're okay?

Isn't that more perfect than things having to be perfection outside you?

That you are okay,

No matter what is happening,

Is perfection.

More,

So much more,

Than having to have the perfect home,

The perfect car,

The perfect spouse,

The perfect life.

To be perfectly happy,

Regardless of sun or rain,

Good or bad.

That's perfection.

And that's your natural state.

Because you,

Just like a tree or anything else,

The tree doesn't say to the rain,

Don't rain.

The tree doesn't say to the sun,

Please hide.

The tree exists in the rain and the sun and needs both.

It's natural state is to function at its highest when it's sunny and to function at its highest when it's rainy.

And that's the same thing for you.

To function at your highest,

No matter what the external is.

And how can you do that?

Is to completely be rooted in yourself.

Rooted in the awareness that you are not separate from the universe.

That things are not just happening to you.

That you're the space where things are happening.

And that you aren't just the experience that you're having.

You're not just that person in a room looking at other people.

You are the room.

You are everyone in that room.

You are everything.

And from that place,

Can you love you and everything in that room?

You're the space where it's all happening.

And you,

As the universe,

Can choose how to express in that space.

And what's going to be true for you.

And to love you,

To absolutely love you.

You as the universe are choosing to love you as a being.

And then to express through that being.

You are not just a personality,

Or just a person,

Or just a body.

Your body is like a focusing crystal.

And your personality is the sound of that crystal.

And you,

As a universal being,

Are more than just that body.

You're everything.

You're everyone.

But you get to use this specific crystal,

And this specific personality,

To love its own self and others.

And your natural state is being in that space.

And your natural state is occurring no matter what your mind is saying.

And you get to choose whether you listen to that little yappy voice,

Or whether you walk and breathe in the state of who you are.

And who you are is a vast universe.

And that's so amazing,

So hard to believe,

So hard to be aware of sometimes.

That you could be all that is,

And you are that.

You're not just this body.

You're not just the park that you're walking through.

You're that body.

You're the park.

And you're the sun shining on the park.

So it doesn't matter if it's raining or the sun is shining.

It's just all points of expression that you're getting to enjoy,

That you're contributing to,

In saying,

I love you.

And I'll take a moment to look at the comments.

It's convincing myself that everything is completely fine,

But I feel PTSD is stopping me from respecting this truth.

When it comes to anxiety or something like post-traumatic stress disorder,

It's very hard to pull out of those thoughts because they take up,

They're so fast,

And they connect to so many other thoughts.

So it's about shifting.

And this is a practice that you can begin to try.

The first thing I do when I have a flood of thoughts of that sort,

Those thoughts have an energy movement of their own.

They want to connect to other thoughts that are in fear.

Because when they can connect into other thoughts that are in fear,

It builds and builds.

And it's just a searching for how each of those thoughts handles fear.

So fear is searching.

So the first thing I have to do is to become very present.

Because those thoughts can take me out of the reality I am in.

Maybe I'm sitting here,

Just having a cup of coffee,

And then I think about an event.

Somehow I'm triggered.

A car goes by and I hear a loud bang,

And I'm triggered into one of those events.

And immediately I'm no longer sitting in this chair.

I'm in that event.

I'm in a different place.

So if I have the capacity,

I try to remind myself I'm feeling a cup.

I get very present.

I get very basic.

This is what this cup feels like in my hand.

I'm going to take a sip of coffee and,

Hmm,

It tastes a little bit like coconut and it's warm.

And I do very tiny thoughts of that sort.

And I get very present to exactly,

Specifically what is happening,

Because it pulls me out of traumatic thoughts.

Now every time you can do this,

It helps your mind build a different pathway.

If possible,

To even know,

When you're in a memory of that sort,

To understand that you are not just that thought.

And that's hard,

Because that thought has run away with you.

And in a weird way,

It comes down to a choice.

If you can stop the racing.

And this is all a process,

Right?

The first day you go to try it,

You may race in these fearful thoughts for some time,

And then go,

Oh my god,

I'm in fearful thought.

And then,

You know,

Okay,

I'm going to drink a cup of coffee,

I'm going to feel my butt in this chair,

The temperature in the room is a little cool,

All those things.

But if you do it once,

What it does is it derails it.

The next time you can do another thought,

Another way,

And it will help you begin to separate that you are not that thought,

You are not that memory.

You had that experience,

But you are no longer in that experience,

And it doesn't dictate the future for you.

It takes a while to build to that.

Then once you can build to that,

And separate from that thought a little bit,

Then you can begin to have the space for that thought to exist.

It exists inside you without you 100% joining it.

When we first go through this,

We join it.

That thought comes up and it just takes over everything.

It's like right here,

Right in our third eye,

And all we can do is think about that thought.

And then we slowly go,

Wait a minute,

Let me be present.

Then I can see that there's this thought,

And sometimes I join it,

And sometimes I can separate from it.

Sometimes I join it,

And sometimes I can separate from it.

And we continue to work with that.

And then we begin to work with the fact that I am this body,

I am this third eye,

I am this thought,

But I am not just this body,

This third eye,

Or just this thought.

This thought can exist in me,

And at the same time another thought can exist,

And another thought,

And another.

And I can separate even further to say,

All these thoughts are existing,

But none of these thoughts are me.

And that takes time.

Do not be angry with yourself if you are just right here all the time.

Because it's just building a little separation.

And once you can build just two or three inches of separation,

You've got it.

Because the next time it'll be six,

And then it'll be ten,

And then it'll be,

Ah yes,

That memory is back.

But I am just not that memory.

And then what we can begin to do is not to say,

It should have been a different way,

It shouldn't be this way,

I shouldn't have had to experience it.

Of course.

Nobody wants to experience trauma.

And I don't wish that for anybody.

But what we can say is that it did,

It happened.

It happened.

And I'm not saying that it's the greatest thing,

Of course not.

A horrible experience is a horrible experience.

We didn't want it to happen.

But I can,

At some point,

Get to that space where I begin to recognize me,

And I understand,

Okay,

This happened.

I don't deny you.

I don't despise you.

I recognize that the me in this experience needs love.

And I can caress it,

And I can love it.

I'm not loving what happened,

But I'm loving the me in that experience.

And then I can take that me,

And I can hold me.

And I can say,

I love you,

Even though you had that experience.

You're loved in that experience.

That's the space that you can get to.

You can love the you that was in that experience.

And as you love the you that experienced it,

That experience begins to dissolve,

Because it's not about everything else,

Because that you in there has been loved.

And you just keep loving that.

Keep loving you.

And oh,

The power,

The absolute power that you will have when you have loved the you that experienced hell.

Then there's nothing to fear.

You don't have to fear hell anymore,

Because you can love you through the midst of that.

There's nothing to fear.

We're all loving each other through these things.

And recognizing again that forgiveness,

There's sort of an over-focus on forgiveness.

Oh,

You know,

You've got to let this go.

You've got to forgive everybody.

You don't owe anybody anything.

You know,

It doesn't matter.

If I attacked you and you forgave me,

It changes nothing for me.

Until I deal with me and forgive myself,

You forgiving me,

I can't accept it,

I can't take it,

I can't understand it.

So there's no use in you forgiving me.

Until I look at me and understand me and deal with me and then forgive myself,

Then I've done something.

But you forgiving me doesn't help me.

Until I forgive me,

It doesn't help anybody else to forgive me.

Because if you forgive me but I don't forgive myself,

I can't take it in.

But if I forgive me and you don't forgive me,

I'm still okay because I've dealt with me.

So if you deal with yourself,

You don't have to forgive anybody else.

All that's required is that you take care of your own emotional well-being.

Because when you acknowledge what happened and love yourself no matter what you experience,

There's nothing to forgive.

You've taken care of your end and it's up to that other person to take care of theirs.

There's no requirement that we just have to forgive others.

But once you have dealt with your own emotion and loved yourself through whatever that emotion is and accepted that situation,

Not that it was okay,

But that you experienced it.

When you've accepted that you experienced it and dealt with that,

Then your perception of that event,

Your ability to be aware in that event,

Is so different that you don't have karma attached to it anymore and there's nothing there for you to do.

Forgiveness is accepting something happened,

Not that it was okay,

Just accepting that a thing happened and taking the time to deal with your emotions around it and loving you no matter what your experience was.

Nothing to do with anybody else.

Because once you've done that,

There'll be nothing for you to deal with because you'll have taken care of what needed to be taken care of.

And it's tough,

I know,

It's tough.

I've spent time on the floor snot-nosed and crying.

I was telling a friend of mine the other day,

Her daughter passed away.

Now this lady is in her 80s and her daughter was in her 60s.

And it was still too young for her child to pass away.

And she was angry at God.

She didn't know what she could say and I was like,

You know what,

Until you've been snot-nosed and on the floor beating it,

Crying and screaming,

You hadn't talked to God.

Because you can talk to God that way.

And that's when we start getting real.

It's okay for us to agonize through some feelings and emotions.

We're not less spiritual.

We're hitting the very spot where we are taking ourselves into transformation.

When I hit an emotion that has me so distraught that I'm lost in it,

Then I have now found something to transform.

And by loving myself in that,

I'm transforming.

It's not that I'm less spiritual.

This is the spiritual journey.

It's to love yourself when you're ugly,

When you're not pretty.

To love yourself when you're full of crap,

When you're the terrible person,

When you're the wonderful person,

When somebody's victimized you,

Or when you're the victimizer,

All of that.

Loving ourselves through all of that.

Not just loving yourself as a victim,

But loving yourself as the perpetrator.

It's okay too.

Love yourself all the way.

I'm just going to look at the comments again.

Usually can find a way out,

But today kept burying himself deeper in fear.

Every thought is an energy.

And no energy seems to run towards change.

It's like change is inevitable.

And we all know,

Oh yeah,

I've got to learn to really be cool with change.

But who among us really runs towards change?

We usually just have to deal with it.

Even our fear doesn't want to change.

Fear,

As an energy,

Is not aware always of what it's putting you through.

Every energy,

It seeks similar energy.

So fear,

Unaware of the turmoil that it's creating,

Is seeking more fear.

Just like any other natural process in the universe.

It's tribal.

It seeks its own kind.

Just as animals get into a pack and seek one another.

Just as a flower turns its face to the sun.

This is natural.

Fear seeks fear,

Because it builds the basis of its own energy.

So we like,

Sometimes,

We imagine,

Because we've seen movies,

And we think,

Fear wants to scare me.

Fear wants to control me.

But fear is just an energy seeking a larger foundation.

By touching,

And it does that by sending a vibration out and seeing what resonates.

And oh,

There's another part of it here.

And then it bonds together.

Just like throwing seeds out into a garden and them growing.

It actually doesn't want to assault us.

But because fear has a storyline,

We get caught up in the storyline.

If we just stopped listening to the story that the fear is saying,

And notice the vibration of that story,

We would see it like little tendrils reaching through our minds for other similar vibrations.

But what we tend to do is go,

I remember when this happened to me.

And then a few weeks later,

That happened.

And that's just one tendril finding it,

And then the vibration going,

Oh yeah,

And then when I was ten,

This happened.

And then when I was twenty,

This happened.

All that's happening is a vibration is activating similar vibrations.

So that it's placement in your mind,

It has the most vibrations happening.

It's just a tribal type of scenario for an energy,

Seeking similar energy.

Now when we become aware of that,

It seems very boring.

And who wants a boring story about fear?

We've taught ourselves a really good scary story is a lot better.

And we mimic that in our life.

We go to the movies to look for really scary stories.

But at some point,

As we become more and more aware that we're in a vibrational universe,

And we want a different way of existing,

Our stories are not as entertaining to us.

We begin to notice that these are vibrations,

And that we can choose the vibration we want to exist in.

And when we are,

For a moment,

Caught up in a story,

And that's okay,

Because what catches our attention is the story.

So it's okay for us to get caught up in our fear for a moment,

And then go,

Oh yeah,

This is a vibration.

There's actually some memory,

An experience,

That talks about that the future is going to be like a certain way.

And that doesn't really know,

That fear doesn't know that the future is going to be that way.

And I can stay stuck in the story,

And fight the story,

But you can't fight the story.

Because the story always comes up with another story,

Or another way.

What you have to step away from is the story.

And go,

Ah,

That's this vibration story.

But I'm not in a story.

I'm the universe,

Which has been called upon to love the stories in this body's experience.

I am the universe,

Which has been called upon to love the stories that this body experiences.

Because that's how the universe grows.

And that's how the universe expands.

Because if the universe can expand to love the vibration that appears as fear through your experience,

Then this universe is expanding to love more.

And that's what we're doing here.

Or we can get caught up in our story,

And say it's too painful,

It's too this,

It's too that,

For me to look at.

And that's fear controlling us.

Because you've already experienced it.

And because you've already experienced it,

You've already been through it.

So there's nothing to fear now.

You've already made it through it.

And now,

You as the universe can love you in the midst of that experience,

And bring love to that situation.

Because as you begin to realize that you are in the center,

Almost like a circus,

You're in the center,

The spotlight turns on,

And there you are in the middle of that tent.

And there's these dancing bears,

And there's the elephants,

And there's the acrobats,

And all these are thoughts.

And you can either announce,

And now we have this,

And now we have that.

Or you can stand back and begin to watch,

And allow,

And notice,

It all happening at the same time.

And you can love that entire scene,

Even though it seems crazy,

And even though it gets out of hand,

And if the tigers go running off,

It's all okay.

Because you are actually in charge.

There's a point of choice.

And it's so hard,

Because we want these things to be automatic.

We want it to be that I automatically am in control of myself.

I want to automatically see that fear,

And be like,

I'm not that fear.

And you go away,

And I'm better than that,

And I don't have to deal with that.

And it doesn't happen that way.

What happens is,

We feel the fear,

And we're living in that fear,

And we're nervous,

And we're picking our,

Oh my God,

And how am I going to,

Oh what the heck,

The next thing is going to happen,

And then we realize,

Wait,

That's me joining this thought.

Let me separate a little bit from it.

Let me remember what it was like,

Yes.

That's what it was like to experience that.

I choose to love myself,

Even when I was experiencing shame and hurt.

And I'm not going to be ashamed of myself.

And I love me.

And just love that.

You did the best you could,

The whole blame time,

And you're loved,

And I'm not ashamed of me.

And in that moment,

The universe changes the vibration of shame into love,

And it expands a little more,

And a star is born,

And that star becomes a planet where people live and don't experience shame.

And we're removing it from our own planet as well.

It takes choice to move out of the stories,

Choice to open to the being that you are.

Your natural state is not complicated,

It's not perfection.

The natural state is like any evolving being.

In our minds we can see the evolution of animals,

And trees,

And plants,

And people on this planet.

The evolution of tools and ways of being,

And ways of thinking.

And we went from people with very limited thought to people with very extensive thought.

And now that thought,

Which can be so extensive and so helpful when it comes to creating certain tools,

Created shame,

And blame,

And hate.

So we are now evolving to love those spaces that we created,

So that we can function in a way that doesn't need the tool of shame,

Or blame,

Or hate,

That we can create without those tools.

And while this is a natural function of our evolution,

Currently we have to choose to evolve that way.

We have to choose to address our thoughts that way.

And hopefully in the future,

When enough of us have addressed loving ourselves through shame,

And pain,

And blame,

Others won't need to.

But for now,

We must choose it.

The natural state of wholeness and unconditional love,

And we dive deeply into that,

To feel it,

To hold that space,

To share it with one another.

Everyone on this live tonight,

Anyone listening in,

We touch that energy in ourselves,

So still and so quiet.

The awareness that our natural state is wholeness.

The awareness that we don't wish for anyone to feel the stagnation and the pain of fear,

And shame,

And hurt.

And that for now,

We must choose to love ourselves in that,

To make it an action.

But that's how the rivers get to the ocean.

We're all a bunch of rivers,

Going towards this ocean of love.

And these rivers must cut through mountains.

They must cut through areas that are not traversed.

And they'll go through dirt areas,

And they'll,

You know,

Over time,

They'll go,

Well where did,

Look at this beautiful river,

Look how fast the water flows.

But it didn't at first.

Just a little trickle.

And that water kept going through,

Kept making a bigger groove,

And that's what we're doing.

In our own minds,

All those tangled,

Rooted nests of things,

We're just washing that dirt away.

And we're making these grooves in our own minds,

Cleaning out places of shame or stagnation,

Places that are held back.

And we're on our way to that ocean,

To share,

To blend.

And we do that,

And we get there.

But it takes a long time for all the rivers to lead to the ocean.

But what a beautiful world it creates,

With all these rivers touching the oceans,

Creating the rain that falls back down.

And that's what we're doing with one another.

See,

It's not a place we're going to.

It's not that one day I'll be enlightened,

Or I'll be awakened,

Or I'll be better.

This is it.

Every day that you build another inch of connecting that river to the ocean,

You're awakening yourself and others.

There's no future that we're getting to,

Where it'll be all just perfect.

We're creating that.

The perfection is that today you loved you.

The perfection is that in that memory where you were embarrassed,

Ashamed,

Hurt,

Invalidated,

That you loved you.

And you wiped away that,

Those tears,

That pain.

You cleared that out,

That stagnant energy.

That's evolution.

That's awakening.

And that's every day.

And the beauty of that is that your own life is more free.

We don't have to wait to be awakened.

We awaken each day a little bit more.

When you are immersed in fear,

You can't feel love,

And that's when you must choose love.

When I cannot feel love,

I choose it.

And that's a hard thing to explain,

But try it.

When I am looking at someone accosting me,

Saying something bad about me,

And I ask,

I wonder if I can love them in this moment.

And I feel around,

And I'm not feeling it all that much,

But I hold the state,

I choose that I will feel love.

Or I choose that I will express that.

Sometimes we have to choose it before it comes.

Because we're so wrapped up in the feeling of anger,

Or dissatisfaction,

Or fear.

And it's not up to my fear to feel love.

It's up to my love to care for that fear.

And I let that sit for a second.

Because when I am in fear,

I am attached to fear.

It's there on my forehead,

I'm so close to it.

That fear may not feel that love,

But I am not that fear.

I am the love that can love that fear.

And I must,

By being present,

Aware,

Whatever it takes,

Even if it's the choice,

Hey fear,

I'm choosing to not be so wrapped up in you.

I'm choosing to love you.

So I'm moving away from the vibration of fear,

And I'm coming from the vibration of love.

It takes a bit of work to do it,

But it's worth going for.

And sometimes,

Right at first,

I just had to know that it was possible,

Or I could do it.

I just had to know,

Yeah,

This is doable,

It's possible.

But whatever you choose to do,

You will do.

If you choose to love your fear,

Not your fear to feel love,

But choose to love your fear,

You will accomplish it.

Because you are the universe,

Loving through this body.

You are not this body.

You are not those thoughts.

You are the creative force of love on this planet,

And that cannot fail.

It hasn't failed in millennia.

It's what creates our entire solar system.

It won't fail.

It's you.

You're not going to fail you.

You're going to love you.

You won't fail you.

You may see that you sometimes fumble,

But you will never fail you.

And it's a joy,

You know?

It's a joy to figure out how to love me.

And now that I love me more and more,

I love loving me.

I love loving you,

And you're going to love loving you.

It is just a dang pleasure to love yourself.

It is.

What a pleasure to love you,

No matter what.

And our minds are great storytellers,

But I am more than my mind,

And you are too.

Our minds are great storytellers,

But we're more than the story.

We're the space that holds the story.

We're the space that holds the story.

So here's that story.

Here's the mind telling a story,

But we're the space,

The whole space,

This room,

The street,

This universe,

That's holding all these different stories.

And can you love them all?

I love sexy me.

I love,

Like,

You know,

Unattractive me.

Me that's blowing my nose in the morning and looking and seeing,

Oh my God.

Me that plucks hairs off my chin.

You know,

I love me.

I love sexy me.

And I love happy me.

And I love sad me.

I can be all those things,

And I can love me in all those states.

And that's,

So can you.

You can love you happy.

You can love you sad.

Loving you does not depend on how you feel.

Loving you is a choice.

And then it's a damn pleasure.

I first chose to love me no matter what,

And now it's a pleasure to love me no matter what.

No one is going to fail themselves.

That's a fear.

You've never failed you yet.

You're still here.

You're still having lifetimes.

You're still willing to show up and learn how to love you.

You don't have to fear that you're going to fail.

This is the best lifetime yet.

And if you choose to love you,

That's all you have to do.

You will.

How many of us have a spouse that we love?

Do we feel it 24-7?

God,

I love them 24-7.

Or do we just think,

Oh my God,

If they do the same thing again,

I'm going to kill them.

How many times have we mentally killed our spouses?

But do we love them?

Yes.

You know,

How many times have we felt that way about our kids?

I swear,

If he leaves his clothes,

I swear,

If she can't learn how to da da da.

All those things.

But do we love them?

Sure.

Do we feel like it all the time?

No.

But it's never a question.

Of course you love your children.

Even when you don't feel like it.

You'd throw yourself in front of a bus if you had to.

And that's why you will not fail.

Because it does not depend on how you feel about you to love you.

Isn't that amazing?

That we are not just our feelings.

I don't worry too much about everybody on the outside loving me.

I only worry about me loving me.

Again,

It's that same thing with forgiveness.

If others love me,

It doesn't matter until I love myself.

Just like you can't forgive me and me feel better,

You can't love me and me feel better.

But when I love me,

Then I'll take all the love you can give me.

It's like my friends,

I'm learning now I can have more love in my life.

Because some of my friends love me even though something about me.

Even though I'm gay,

Some of my friends love me.

At first I didn't like that.

But now I'll take it.

I'll take the maximum amount of love that they can give.

And why?

Because I love me so much,

I can take your little dot and enjoy it now.

I don't need for your dot to be completely understanding and completely aware and forgiving and all those things so that I get the maximum love from you.

If all you can give me is a morsel,

I'll taste it.

I like it.

I love you.

Because I have enough love for myself that I can enjoy the tidbits of love that you can give.

Just like I have enough forgiveness for myself that if somebody else also wants to forgive me,

Wonderful.

It's all in how you treat you and you think of you and you love you.

And that which used to be unacceptable is quite alright because I'm not dependent on it.

There's no part of you that's ugly or unlovable.

The parts that feel unlovable have been created by fear and lack of love.

And as soon as they receive love,

No matter how they have appeared,

They transform.

And you're here to transform yourself.

And you can't get it wrong.

We think we have to do it just the right way,

But no.

We can't get it wrong.

And it's a natural way of being.

There's only fear and thought that interrupts that.

When you think,

I want to love me,

But then a thought comes along.

Oh,

I can't.

You know,

You need to.

You don't deserve.

You gotta.

First is this.

Love that thought because it's not you.

Our thoughts interrupt our natural way of being.

Naturally,

You love you and everybody else.

That's your natural state.

You've been taught to think of people as deserving or not deserving.

You've been taught to think certain ways about yourself.

But your natural state enjoys walking through the park on rainy days and sunny days and loves all the aspects of themselves and doesn't bother with labeling things as good or bad about themselves.

It's just what is.

And can I love that?

Yes.

Yes,

You can.

As long as you choose it.

And that's how important choice is.

Choose you.

You've been taught to not choose you.

You've been taught that you don't have choice.

And why?

Because choice is so powerful.

Choice is your right and your gift that you choose how you want to live your life,

Who you want to be with,

Everything.

Choice is the highest right.

And we've been taught that certain things must be given,

That you don't have choices and certain,

Oh,

We've got to.

Because why?

Because choice is so powerful.

Because if you learn that choice trumps fear,

That choosing to love you trumps the feelings,

How powerful you'll be,

How free you'll be.

Free to make all the kind of choices you want.

And I'm just holding this space with you guys,

A beautiful space.

It's right there at the edge of fear,

The choice point to lean into you,

To lean into the awareness that you are so much more.

This fear wants you to believe that it's bigger and stronger.

But remember,

It's just a vibration that has a story.

And that vibration only knows to use that story to find other stories so that the vibration becomes stronger.

That fear is simply a vibration that feels uncomfortable,

But it is so comfortable with itself that it seeks other fear.

And that you first must be aware that it's simply a vibration,

And then using the vibration of love to surround that fear.

I love you.

I know you got this.

And at no point should we ever be disappointed in ourselves.

Love you.

And I know that you love me,

Because the universe that is you showed up to love me and yourself.

And the universe that I am,

I love me and I love you.

And I love you.

And I want you to love you.

I want you to know how amazing you are.

Never be disappointed in you.

And know you cannot fail,

Because you are the universe that created you.

You did an amazing job.

And you were created by love,

From love,

For love.

And it's going to be a pleasure to love you.