Resetting The Co-Regulation Field With Your Child

Okay,

We're here for a co-regulation reset.

And so we're just gonna start by allowing everything that feels heavy,

Everything that feels off or unsupportive right now in the regulatory field,

Everything that you've been carrying or over-carrying,

We're just gonna offer it over to the Violet Flame.

So you can just see things specifically and name them or just set that intention and just allow the Violet Flame to be right in front of your body and just offer everything over to it.

So anything specific,

Anything in general,

It doesn't matter,

Just letting it go,

Just clearing the deck here.

So if there's been a specific instance or incident recently that you wanna offer over,

If it's just tension in the body,

It's just all the survival that's been active and needed to be carried.

We just offer the Violet Flame all of it to invite that reset.

Pause the recording here if there feels like more time here would be supportive to release and to name things,

To let go,

Could possibly even do journaling if you need to here,

Whatever it takes to begin to clear the deck for a reset.

We're just going to ask the Violet Flame to continue to work through this whole process so it will stay active even as we move forward,

Just continuing to clear the energy,

Clear the air,

Release what is stuck and stagnant and opening up where the stress response has become part of the co-regulation.

So we're gonna begin to follow the breath in through the nose and out through the mouth and allowing the breath out to be as if you're blowing through a straw.

A little bit of tone to the lips and we're inviting that exhale to move away from the body out of the field.

So we can imagine even that we're trying to blow that air through that straw and allowing it to move all the way out of the room and letting that breath be as slow as possible,

Allowing the jaw and the shoulders to stay relaxed,

Letting the ribs move open on the inhale.

And as we drop into this breath,

I like to just take a moment to forgive ourselves for anything conscious or unconscious that we might be holding that we're not doing enough,

That we are the problem,

We're the reason why the other person in this co-regulation isn't fill in the blank,

Right?

And so specifically here as we're thinking about our children,

About those who can only regulate through our system and the burden that that can feel like sometimes as well as where we make ourselves wrong for everything that's happening,

Everything that they're experiencing,

How they're processing their experience.

And we just offer forgiveness to ourselves.

And we remember that their expression of the regulation isn't always a direct correlation to us.

They have their own innate nature that we're learning about,

That they are learning about.

And so how can we be the center of this co-regulation without taking on so much shame and blame and guilt?

And again,

You're welcome to pause the recording if you wanna spend more time in this place of forgiveness.

The violet flame is still working here.

And so burning away the shame,

The guilt,

The places of unforgiveness,

Letting that tender mama heart have some love,

Some compassion.

You're doing so much,

You're carrying so much,

It's hard.

And so in this co-regulation reset,

Just allowing yourself to let go.

While we want to be conscious of the co-regulation,

We have to remember that we're not overly responsible for everything.

And there's no way we can track everything.

And we also have to have space for our little precious star beings to become themselves.

And we're learning what that is,

And we're learning how their soul needs that to come into form.

And so there's an aspect here that we're never going to be able to be so regulated that there isn't a quote unquote problem or issue or hiccup.

But what we're doing in this reset is clearing the stagnant energy,

The stuck energy,

The places where we're overholding and the places where we're in shame and guilt,

Which is creating too much survival.

So go ahead and take an inhale and hold at the top.

And you're gonna hold for a moment while you're holding the breath in,

Let the body go.

You might even give some wiggles in the pelvis and the shoulders,

Just relaxing the body,

Opening the body while holding the breath.

When you need to let go of the breath,

It needs to whoosh out the mouth,

Big whoosh,

Let it go.

Repeat that a few times,

Just bringing the breath in,

Holding it,

And then letting it go,

Big whoosh,

Just letting everything that needs to go be carried out of the body.

And then I want you to think about your perfect attunement field for this regulation.

So perhaps you would like to see you and your child sitting on clouds together or laying in a beautiful field of flowers or sitting beside a stream.

So just take a moment to allow the images of your perfect place for you and your baby,

You and your little star to connect and be safe and relaxed.

And think of some of the other energies you'd like to have there,

Joy,

Connection,

Health,

Abundance,

Gratitude,

Beauty.

Name some of those energies into this place,

This reset,

Reattunement.

And when that feels available and a beautiful image,

Bring it into your heart,

Bring it into your belly,

And bring it into your brain.

So we allow all three centers to be attuned to this image and to the energies and emotions that you are wanting to anchor.

And again,

This can be a place where you pause,

You could even do some journaling on this.

There's an invitation to maybe have an image or a picture of this perfect place,

Maybe an attunement altar in your child's room.

And after you bring this image into the belly,

Into the heart,

Into the brain,

Just resting into it again for yourself,

Just feeling yourself there,

Seeing yourself there,

Hearing the sounds of that space and place,

Hearing maybe the sounds of your child's laughter,

Seeing their smile.

And then if there's something specific that needs to be reset,

Such as a sleep pattern,

An eating pattern,

A safety pattern with being with other people,

Whatever might be a little glitchy that we're resetting,

Just begin to speak to your child in this energy space that they are safe,

They are loved,

They are connected,

And just begin to see whatever might be stuck in their field or their body beginning to dissolve or dematerialize or vaporize.

So if they picked up a little bit of stress around sleep,

Perhaps they came in with it because being in the body is a little uncomfortable,

Just seeing that energy dissolve so that they can have safety and connection.

If maybe they tend to feel your stress,

If you are working or needing to get things done,

Needing to move fast,

And that becomes a bit of a trigger in the field for them,

Or they become extra clingy,

Or even in the opposite,

They become quite dismissive of you or forgetful of you,

Just checking in,

Finding that energy in their body that's usually living in the back of the heart,

Back of the throat,

Top of the head,

And just dissolve it,

Seeing it burn away,

Lift away.

And again,

You can pause the recording and repeat any of that again and again as much as you need to,

Just dissolving where the energies become knotted or stuck,

Anywhere they're following a false pattern to get attention,

To find a form of safety that may not be how you want to have them entrained.

And then just taking a few moments,

Speaking in this energy space to the soul and to the body of your child and letting them know how well they are held,

How well they are tended,

And specifically how safe they are in this place that might have been a little crunchy or a little dissonant before.

So in the case of sleep,

Just letting them know that angels watch over them,

That your soul watches over them,

That they are safe,

Their body is protected,

Whatever you would like to say,

Entraining that.

And then on your next inhale,

Hold that breath in.

On the exhale,

We call in the energy of rose quartz,

Allowing this energy,

This pink,

Beautiful light energy to come in and encircle both of you,

Both you and your child,

So that you're now held in a circle of pink light.

That pink light moves in and through and around both of your bodies and it anchors into the place where your co-regulation is happening,

Your field,

Your cloud.

And you can also send that same pink energy to specific places in your house or your child's life where you want to make sure the co-regulation's holding a little more fully.

You can see it in their bedroom,

Surrounding their bed,

Aspect or place in their house or somewhere they have to go.

And then just to anchor this whole process,

I want you to give a name to this new co-regulation.

So maybe it is safety,

Maybe it is even the thing that you are inviting the child to,

Such as sleep,

Eating well.

It could also be something more emotional,

Such as this is the field of joy,

This is the field of connection.

Whatever word works for you,

Just anchoring that in.

And then just see yourself holding your child or embracing your child.

Whisper any loving words that you need to,

Anything you want to make sure they receive in this space.

Anything your body needs to receive as well in terms of gratitude or support.

When you're ready,

Roll your shoulders,

Wiggle your fingers,

Take another sighing breath.

Know that this process is one that you can do whenever there needs to be a big reset.

You can also do this daily as a way of entrainment.

You can follow along with this as a guided process or just work with any of the elements,

Completion or a journaling process,

However you want.

The more we entrain the field,

The stronger it will hold subconsciously so that we don't have to have direct focus on it.

And just know that you're doing a really amazing job and that regulating yourself and regulating others is a lot.

You're worthy of rest,

You're worthy of support,

And you are able to reset the field over and over again as you continue to grow and support you and your baby.

And you have a wonderful day.