Through meditation,
I've come to realize that my present is a product of my past.
I also see my past experiences unconsciously manifesting in my present as part of my personality.
Do you think it is wise to try to revisit traumatic experiences from my past to heal and free myself from suffering?
I know that therapy helps,
And I have already done it,
But could this also be achieved through meditation?
Or do you think I am wasting my time?
In cases of really deep trauma,
You need help from others.
For example,
Go through therapy.
Or even take certain drugs and medicines.
And if your situation is such that you have no control over the range of emotions,
Whether that's rage or grief,
And you can't control it,
You need to go through therapy.
If you can't control it,
At that point you need help from subject matter experts.
However,
Besides those really urgent cases,
Other cases can be helped by meditation.
Meditation does not purposely surface those deep traumas.
But if you are totally relaxed in your body and mind,
And you are still,
You fall into a certain stage that mimics kind of your sleep.
And in that state,
As a natural consequence of that state,
As if you are dreaming,
Those certain subconscious thoughts tend to rise to the surface.
So in the beginning of meditation practice,
Usually it's those really awfully emotional or stimulating thoughts that tend to rise first.
The reason why I told you in the previous question to avoid overly dramatic or stimulating experiences is that these experiences and thoughts will tend to interfere with your meditation process if you are a beginner.
But even despite those barriers,
If you go through the challenges and you can maintain that focus and that calmness and equanimity throughout the process,
These distracting thoughts will tend to disappear.
And in that calm,
You will start experiencing those traumas and memories that you didn't even know existed from your early childhood that will start to rise to the surface and become aware of them.
And as these memories and thoughts arises,
Because of the trauma,
You know that they are associated with certain emotional reactions.
And you will experience those emotions that's associated with those traumas,
Whether that's rage or grief.
And then you will realize at that point that these traumas have remained deep within you as traumas,
And they have not yet been healed.
So what I'm saying,
If these thoughts arises of past events,
And you chase after it,
And you go deep chasing after it,
And you will encounter those associated emotions.
However,
If you don't chase after those thoughts,
But still maintain focus on the breath,
Despite those thoughts arising,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And do not chase after those thoughts,
And when I say focus on the breath,
I mean you are mindful of the breath,
Which means you are focused and not subject to the emotional stimulus.
And if you are able to maintain this mindfulness on the breath,
Despite the memories of these past hurts or traumas arising,
And with repeated practice,
Eventually you get to a state in which you recall the memories,
But don't associate them with any emotions,
And then you can say you are healed.
And at that point,
We may say that this is no longer a trauma,
But it's an experience.
So you may remember those events now,
But you are not affected by those events.
It's as if you are seeing them as a third party witness.
And that's the healing process.
What I'm saying is that meditation is not meant to heal in such a way.
I'm saying that such healing process is a natural consequence of meditation practice.
It's almost as if remaining moisture of a justly washed dish will tend to evaporate with time.
It's the same thing with meditation practice.
All these traumas and thoughts will tend to evaporate through meditation practice.
However,
When these thoughts arise during meditation,
And you allow yourself to actually delve deeper into that experience,
Into the associated emotions of that trauma,
And kind of allow yourself to linger in that state,
You will be able to heal.
And if you allow yourself that space instead of creating that distance,
Then no matter how long you do meditation,
It won't be healed.
