Nighttime Talk Down

Hi,

My name is Karen.

This meditation is created to help those of us who sometimes struggle with sleep.

And so if this is you,

Whether it's something you struggle with often,

Or maybe this is a once in a while thing,

I hope that my words can help to soften the bed for you and to ease your mind so that you can be free of worry or any thoughts of the past.

When we're worrying,

Generally we are anxious about what might come or might not come.

When we're dealing with depression or disappointment,

Anger,

Sadness,

It's typically involved with our past events.

But these events aren't holding us.

We actually have the power to let them go let them go by shifting the perspective of the mind and what it's interested in.

So if you'd like to join me,

Draw back the covers of your bed and climb in.

Arrange yourself to be as comfortable as you can be,

Using as many blankets or pillows as you think will help.

And if you should nod off while I'm chatting,

No worries.

After all,

That's really what we're going to try and achieve is your restful sleep tonight.

We're going to begin by letting the mind focus a little bit.

Focus on one thing,

Grounding it if you will.

We'll begin by just practicing a little bit of a box breath.

In a box breath,

We breathe in for a count of four,

Hold for a count of four,

Exhale for a count of four,

And then pause again for a count of four.

You don't have to think about it.

Don't worry,

I'll count you through it.

Let's begin by taking a big breath in and then exhale everything.

Let the body be completely empty.

Let's begin.

Breathing in for a count of four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Pause,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Exhale,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Pause,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Breathe in,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Pause,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Exhale,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Pause,

Four,

Three,

Two,

Last time,

Here we go,

In four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Pause,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Exhale,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One,

Pause,

Four,

Three,

Two,

One.

Now let your breath just come and go as it pleases.

Our breath should feel as natural as it was the day you were born.

There's no need to think about it or to try to control it.

You've been doing this all your life and you're doing it beautifully right now.

Maybe allow your body to take a nice little stretch,

And if you wanted to,

You could sigh out your breath or just slowly exhale.

And as you exhale,

Allow your body just to melt a little bit more.

Allow your eyes to become heavy,

And whenever you're ready,

You'll close them.

Life can be challenging,

And we can't always find the solution to our problems in the time frame that we want to.

It may be that there's not enough information for us to make a decision on something,

Or it's not really ours to solve,

And we're just concerned about it.

But the mind needs to rest.

When we start with the box breath,

It's really nice just to put something pretty simple in front of the mind to pay attention to.

We are nothing but nature,

And all nature is guided by circadian rhythms.

Circadian rhythms are these clusters of time,

Patterns of time,

Which with the lightness of day or the darkness of night signal the body's natural internal clock to either wake up or to fall asleep.

And if we don't sleep through the evenings and night times,

Our body doesn't really get a chance to heal itself,

And our greatest healing will happen during REM,

A wonderful moment of sleep.

Without it,

We'll feel a little bit groggy in the morning,

And accumulatively,

That's going to add up.

I like to think of the ideas that are troubling us,

Those conundrums of life,

As things that we can set aside.

If we don't have a solution for it now,

Tell yourself,

There's not enough information,

And I'm just not ready to make a decision.

And that's okay.

That's all right.

So imagine that problem explained in detail on a sheet of paper,

And once you've looked at that sheet of paper and said,

No solution will be found tonight,

You can place that conundrum paper into a box.

So let's go through some of those thoughts that you're having.

Perhaps there was something in the day that didn't turn out the way you'd hoped it would.

We can't change the past.

And whether this occurred today in the morning,

The afternoon,

Or the early evening,

There is nothing that we can do to change it.

But what we can do is perhaps find a way the next day,

When well-rested,

To either make amends,

Make improvements,

Or let it go completely.

And know that whatever you did,

You offered your very best efforts.

And sometimes,

That alone has to be enough.

These moments when we believe that we fail to achieve what we should achieve,

By skill set,

Or intelligence,

Or what we're entitled to,

These can be great learning lessons.

We can recognize our humanity in those moments,

When no matter how hard we try,

It's just not going to be enough.

And in those moments,

Know that you can lay your head on the pillow and sleep what is known as the sleep of the just.

You left nothing on the table,

You tried everything possible,

And still there was no solution.

Life is like that sometimes.

You just have to chalk it up to experience,

And take the wisdom of whatever that experience has to offer,

And hopefully grow from it.

Sometimes,

We are in a state of sadness.

We recognize that we've lost something.

This is the nature of life.

There are hellos and goodbyes.

And the goodbyes can be very painful at times.

But I would say to that,

Don't ever miss an opportunity to say hello,

For fear of the pain of the goodbye.

The pain of a goodbye is directly proportional to the joy and love experienced from hello,

Until that point of goodbye.

It offers us opportunities to grow in ways of compassion,

And understanding,

And selflessness.

It's all right to be sad.

If those events of the day,

Or recent past,

Are causing you anger,

Or sadness,

Or regret,

Or resentment,

Invite yourself not to revisit whatever the event was.

Revisiting it will not change the outcome.

You can't change the script.

You can't think of the clever thing to say,

Because it wasn't said.

And the past that you're trying to change,

Becomes a fiction that still causes you pain.

Take the wisdom from that event,

And let it go.

Perhaps you're worrying about tomorrow,

What might or might not happen.

When we're anxious,

We're truly grasping for control of something that we have virtually no control over.

There are so many things that go into making the future.

You're not an island.

You will be affected by the actions of others,

The needs and wants of others.

The best that you can do,

The best that any of us can do,

Is to prepare so that whatever might come,

You'll be as ready as you can be.

But trust that Murphy's Law is probably going to play a part in this as well.

We can't control the actions of others.

We can't control what their needs are,

Or what their agenda might be.

All that we can do is to control our response to all of these variables.

Know that you've done everything you can.

And so for tonight,

Let's lay all of those worries into that box that holds our issues or struggles of the day.

Tomorrow is as much a fiction as the past is unchangeable.

And we come to realize,

To understand that the only place that's real is right now,

In this breath.

Where do you feel your breath right now?

As you breathe in,

Perhaps you feel it vividly in your belly.

Breathing in,

The belly rises.

Breathing out,

The belly falls.

Or you might feel it in the chest.

Breathing in,

The ribcage expands.

Breathing out,

The ribcage shrinks.

You might notice it in the nostrils,

Or in the airway passages of the head or throat.

Breathing in,

The air is cool.

Breathing out,

The air is warm.

Begin to notice,

Especially,

Your exhalation,

Whether you're studying it from the belly,

The chest,

Or the airway passages in the head.

Unlike the inhalation,

The exhalation,

The out-breath,

Provides us with a wonderful sense of releasing tension.

We literally feel in the body a sinking,

A melting away.

Perhaps you can imagine yourself with each exhalation,

Sinking a little more deeply into your bed.

And as you sink into your bed,

Any troubles that might remain,

Any puzzlements,

Any worries about tomorrow,

Or sadness or anger about the day,

All of these things float up.

And then,

As you exhale,

You blow them away from the surface of the bed,

Just as a wind would gently blow leaves across the surface of a still pond.

They don't serve you.

Let your breath release them.

Perhaps you'll become aware of the sounds,

Sounds in your own body,

A gurgling stomach,

The sound of breath itself,

Or the pulsing of your heart.

You may notice sounds further away,

Wind,

Or a clock ticking,

A trusted old dog snoring.

Whatever these sounds are,

There's no need to follow them.

These are not your story.

These are not your story.

Breathe in deeply.

And as you exhale,

Let go any desire to follow the stories of the wind or the rain.

Release any need to follow the stories of the day,

Or worries for tomorrow.

Allow the cover of darkness to wrap itself around you.

And know that you're safe.

And know that everything that you need,

You have within you,

And what perhaps felt overwhelming today,

Well-rested tomorrow,

You'll be able to tackle,

And you will skillfully work through whatever problem is there.

As you nod off,

I'm just going to whisper some affirmations.

These are really love notes to the self.

Just a reminder,

So that you truly know in your heart how wonderful you are,

And how deserving of this rest you are.

You are beautiful.

You are wise.

You are compassionate.

You are loving.

You are creative.

You are strong and braver than you know.

There is no one like you.

When you arrived in this universe,

The universe smiled.

It was made better by your presence.

And the light you bring daily is appreciated by so many.

You are loved by so many.

Can you hear your breath?

What is it telling you?

Follow your breath deep down.

Let it guide you to a deep and restful sleep.

And tomorrow,

Well-rested,

With greater clarity,

You'll be able to face whatever is there with skill and grace.

Namaste.