Dear parent,
I am so sorry for your loss.
I know there is no meditation in the world that can undo what has happened.
But from one parent who has grieved pregnancy loss to another,
I hope to offer you a space to acknowledge your grief and take care of yourself.
Your grief and the physical toll of your experience mean that it's really important to be kind to your body at this time.
And so I invite you to tend to yourself by making any adjustments you need to,
To be completely physically comfortable.
You might want to lie down,
To put a quilt or blanket around yourself,
To adjust the temperature or light in the room,
Or to wear comfortable clothing.
Take some time to do this,
Treating yourself with tenderness and love.
Allowing your body to surrender to gravity,
So allowing whatever surface you're resting on to hold you,
And just trusting that surface to hold you.
Surrendering to gravity as an act of acceptance of your current experience,
And feeling the solidity of the earth below.
So we're going to gently scan through the body now,
Finding those places where you might be holding grief,
Just allowing the surface beneath you,
The earth beneath you,
To take some of that weight from you.
So bringing your attention to your head,
Sensing from the top of your head,
To your face,
The sides of your head,
The back of your head and your brain inside,
And any grief that you find there,
Just acknowledging that and surrendering it down into the earth,
Allowing what supports you to hold you,
And allowing the earth to hold that grief for you.
Coming now to your neck,
Throat,
Shoulders,
Sensing whatever's in your neck,
Throat and shoulders,
And any grief that you find there,
Allowing the earth below you to hold it,
Just as it holds you.
Sensing through your arms,
Hands,
Down to your fingertips,
Sensing whatever's there,
And again allowing yourself to surrender any grief to the ground below you.
Sensing into your chest,
Ribs,
Upper back and heart space,
Allowing yourself to experience whatever you find there,
Allowing the surface below you to hold you,
And allowing the ground to take and to hold any grief that you can allow yourself to surrender.
Sensing down now into your lower back,
Hips,
Abdomen and genital area,
And all that is inside your abdomen,
Allowing the surface beneath you to support you,
Acknowledging whatever you find,
And releasing any grief to the ground,
Allowing the ground to hold that for you.
Sensing down now into your legs,
All the way down to your feet and your toes,
Allowing yourself to be held,
Allowing your grief to be held,
And then coming back to all of those areas where the grief was,
Gently be gentle with yourself,
And looking underneath the grief,
Because what you'll find there is that beneath that grief is love.
So allowing yourself to be aware of your whole being,
Of all that you're feeling,
But most powerfully of all,
Of the love that's underneath the grief,
The love that is throughout your whole being,
And allowing that love to permeate you,
Allowing it to fill your whole self,
Allowing yourself to be a being of love,
Allowing yourself to feel it,
And the awareness of this love might not necessarily remove any sadness,
But the love is there,
And it's full,
Nonetheless.
And now sending that love outwards,
Knowing that it will find your baby wherever they are,
And you may wish to thank your baby now for the love that they brought into your life,
A love that you may always feel.
Holding space for yourself now to experience whatever emotions you have,
Whatever you feel is valid,
And then gently coming back once again to an awareness of your body,
Grounding yourself in the moment,
So aware of your body where you're resting on the surface,
Aware of your head,
Shoulders,
Arms,
Torso,
Legs,
And taking some deep breaths,
So breathing in nice and deep,
Breathing out,
Allowing the out-breath to be just a little bit longer than your in-breath,
Signaling a moment of safety to your body,
And you can start to gently come out of the practice now,
So giving yourself permission to release anything you need to release,
Permission to hold anything you need to hold,
Aware of your body where it's resting,
Continuing to breathe nice and deeply,
Remember now's the time to take care of yourself,
And gently becoming aware once again of your surroundings,
And you are processing a lot physically,
Emotionally,
So if you need to snooze just now to allow yourself to process that,
That's okay,
If you need to rest here for a bit longer and just give yourself some time and some space,
That's okay,
If you need to move,
To shake it out,
To express in some way,
That's okay,
Whatever you need to do,
And when you're ready,
Coming back to full awareness of your surroundings,
Continuing to allow yourself to breathe,
Continuing to offer yourself love and compassion,
And when you're ready,
You can come back to your day.
Please continue to be really gentle with yourself,
Dear parent,
And ask for support from those around you if you need.
Take good care.
