Welcome to the Soften,
Soothe and Allow Those Difficult Emotions Meditation.
When we allow ourselves to experience tough emotions,
And then find where they exist in our body,
We can start to develop a different relationship with them.
Opening up to those difficulties,
We can begin to create a sense of peace within,
And accept our lives as imperfect.
If at any time during this meditation you experience too much discomfort,
Stay with your breath until you feel better.
If things are still too much,
Try opening your eyes and looking about the room.
You may want to discontinue the meditation and take a walk or have a cup of tea,
Or even reach out to a friend.
Taking care of yourself is mindfulness in action,
And you can always try this meditation at another time.
So let's get started in a comfortable position,
Either in a chair or on a cushion,
Making sure your back is upright yet relaxed.
Take a few deep breaths,
Letting out any tension that you're experiencing right now.
And let your breath return to normal.
Noticing how your breath feels as it comes in and out of your body.
Noticing where you feel the breath most strongly.
Is it in your chest,
Your belly,
Your torso,
Or maybe even your nose?
Think of a situation that's causing you a lot of emotional upset right now.
It may be something you're feeling about yourself or something you don't like,
Or some mistake you've made,
Or it could be a situation that's just very difficult to deal with right now.
Take a moment to remind yourself of those details,
Trying not to get too lost in the storyline,
But get in touch with what it is that's troubling you and how you feel about it.
Become aware of what emotions are attached to this difficult situation.
There's probably more than one.
So maybe just label them anger,
Disappointment,
Fear.
What emotion is coming up for you right now?
Choose the emotion that you feel most strongly.
See if you can tell where you feel that emotion in your body.
Is it a gripping in the throat,
A heaviness behind the eyes,
Feeling it in your gut?
What part of the body do you notice is physically manifesting the emotion that you're feeling right now?
Describe these sensations to yourself.
It feels hot or cold,
Tingling or numb,
Tightening in the muscle.
Just describe what it is in your mind.
This is by definition a painful emotion,
And we naturally want to resist it and tighten up against it and make it go away,
But this just makes it all the more painful.
So instead of resisting,
Soften around the emotion,
Being aware of the emotion in your body and just try to soften around it.
See if you can relax a little bit of the feeling of tension or pressure.
Let the muscle be soft without a requirement that they become soft,
Like simply applying heat to sore muscles.
Remember you're not trying to make the sensation go away.
You are just being with it with loving awareness.
And if the emotion is very intense,
You may want to just focus the awareness around the edges,
Softening around the boundaries or the borders of the emotion rather than going fully in.
Just softening around the edge of the sensation.
Then let's soothe yourself gently.
Recognize and validate how hard it is to be feeling this.
Every single one of us constantly feels really difficult and painful emotions,
And we need to be able to comfort ourselves for the pain of living this human life.
So take your hand and gently touch the place where you're feeling the emotion.
Let your touch be soft and caring.
Gently trying to soothe this difficult emotion.
You can use some kind words like,
Oh,
This is such a painful experience,
I'm so sorry it's hard for you right now.
And then next we're going to allow any feelings that you might be experiencing.
Remember that you are allowed to feel this.
It's natural to feel this way.
You aren't choosing to feel this.
This is how it's happening.
Just soothe and comfort yourself that this is hard right now and hard to be feeling this.
Letting that emotion be there.
You're safe right now in this moment.
Take a moment to notice if the sensation is changing at all.
Is the quality of it shifting or moving?
For the next few minutes,
If that same emotion is still very strong,
Or maybe even a new emotion comes up,
Just continue locating the sensation in your body,
Softening around the edges of that sensation so that there's not so much tightness or constriction.
With yourself and your body,
Acknowledging the difficulty that you're going through right now,
Caring for yourself with tender compassion.
If your mind gets pulled away into thinking about the situation,
That's okay.
It's natural.
Just gently try to bring your awareness back to the sensations of that emotion in your body tangibly.
If any feelings of peace or comfort arise,
See if you can be aware of and be with those emotions as well.
If it's still very difficult,
Stay with the pain using the words soften,
Soothe,
And allow.
Each time you feel your mind starting to drift off,
Just try to refresh in your mind the source of the pain,
Getting in touch with the feelings in your body,
Softening,
Soothing,
And allowing.
Now dropping the focus of this particular emotion or sensation,
Let your awareness fill your entire body from head to toe,
Resting in the awareness of your physical presence.
When you're ready to end this practice,
You can place your hand gently over your heart,
Getting in touch with feelings of tenderness,
Kindness,
And compassion for what you're going through,
Remembering that we're all imperfect and that life is imperfect.
When we can open to that,
We can be happy and peaceful,
Even in the face of our suffering.
When you're ready,
You can go ahead and open your eyes,
Letting your attention move out into the world around you.
Thank you for your practice.
