Live Event - Lights, Courage, Action - Thinking To Creating

Alright,

So let's just test this.

Yeah,

Alright.

So why did I call this light's courage and action going from thinking to creating?

Because like I said before,

There's so many things that are possible if we get past that phase of thinking.

If you think about it,

Thinking is like a bridge.

We have this idea or an insight and then there's this bridge of thinking which should be like a small bridge really where you just walk across it.

And then you're at the place,

You're at the creation part,

You're acting,

You're doing something or you're not even doing something,

You're just having an insight.

So it's like a bridge,

Thinking is that in between.

But a lot of us get stuck on the bridge or it feels like one of those long bridges.

I don't know,

Someone tell me the longest bridge that they know of in the chat.

Feels like one of those long bridges where you're like,

I'm so tired of walking across this thinking bridge and it feels like this thinking bridge never ends.

I'm hungry,

I'm tired,

I'm stressed out.

When is this bridge going to end?

I don't even see the end of it.

And it can almost sometimes feel like one of those,

Even one of those underground tunnels that you go through.

You know when you go through an underground tunnel and you're like,

It's just completely dark in here.

When am I going to get out of here?

That's what thinking feels like sometimes,

Right?

I don't know,

You guys tell me.

So thinking to creating is the key because having an idea then stopping ourselves,

That's what limits most of the things that happen in life.

And then we turn bitter and regretful and it's even worse because it's like,

Hey I've got all these ideas,

I know how I can do this,

I know what to do.

The internet is full of information,

There's sessions like this where there's bunches of information that you're receiving,

Your thinking is working,

It's absorbing that,

You know what to do,

You have everything you need.

But then it's like,

That's it,

It just stops there.

Nothing changes in your life.

And I remember feeling this way.

So I'm going to share with you how I felt.

I'm not just here telling people things,

Everything I say,

Like I always say this in my sessions,

I don't plan what I'm going to say,

Ever.

I just make the title and then I show up because this is all my experiences,

Right?

So I remember having all these ideas of,

I want to do something where I feel a bit more fulfilled or I just want to do fun things like I want to do some traveling,

Even things like I want to ask a girl out because I couldn't speak to women for a while.

Even things like that,

I was like,

I want to just do things.

I know what it takes.

I know like I have the information,

I can't get past that.

So I became this information storing machine.

Like I was on Google just searching,

Learning,

Reading books,

Constantly constant,

Constant,

Constant.

But then I still,

I felt like I needed more information constantly to get to where I wanted which was some place where I felt like I had some peace or some purpose or meaning in life,

Right?

I thought the more I read,

The more I'm going to know.

And I did learn a lot of things about myself.

But there were many times where I was bitter because I was like,

Well,

I know that I could do something different but what if it doesn't work out?

What if that relationship doesn't work out?

What if that job doesn't work out?

What if,

What if,

What if,

What if,

What if something bad happens?

And a lot of the time it was unconscious actually.

It was just this physical response,

Just like stopping me.

Almost like I felt my whole body tense up.

I don't know if anyone could relate to that.

So I had a lot of thinking but I couldn't,

I didn't create anything.

And the reason why I call this light,

Courage and action is because first we have to switch on the lights inside ourselves.

When it feels like things are going bad,

First we have to find some kind of light.

Because if you're surrounded in darkness and you're believing that you are the darkness,

Your life is darkness,

It's very hard to move into change because your whole body responds,

Right?

And I had a lot of anxiety and shame and low self-worth,

No confidence.

And yeah,

I just,

I didn't have many lights on basically.

I had short term lights,

Let's call them,

A buzz.

For me it was a lot about let's go and drink alcohol to just de-stress,

Let's call it.

Or let's go and eat some amazing food,

Let's go out for dinner to de-stress.

Let's go to get a massage de-stress.

Let's do this to de-stress.

Really distract.

Distract.

Because when it feels like you're in this loop of life and nothing's really changing and you're stuck and you're trapped by your overthinking,

Then of course we want to weigh out.

We want to get away from that.

So I'm not judging any of this.

We want that to stop.

So we find these temporary lights,

Let's call them.

These lights,

Almost like when you buy,

I don't even know what I'm thinking of,

But yeah let's just say you buy a candle that's this sized.

So it's just you switch it on and okay I got a bit of light.

Then the candle just melts.

It's gone.

And then you're back to the darkness.

So when I say light,

I really mean the light within us.

The light that really is our essence.

Because there's a lot of talk about hey you have to work through your overthinking.

You have to try and change your thoughts.

But the way I see it now,

It's pretty hard to change thoughts because it's coming from the subconscious.

Coming from your upbringing.

So I tell most people leave them alone.

Leave thoughts alone.

Don't try and mess around with that.

Instead,

Raise this light up in you.

Because that's a different part of you.

Start raising the light from your heart you can call it.

Some people might call this spirit.

I don't know,

Everyone has different names.

I'm not one of those people who specifies names but I just say light.

So raise this light and then you feel a bit like happy about life.

Hey look I've got these things going on for me.

I'm healthy hopefully.

I've got this one person who makes me feel good in my life.

Just turn on that light.

That's the first thing.

And when I say courage,

Now this is where it gets really interesting.

Because whenever we want to do anything and we have mental blocks in our way,

We think that we have to try and change those mental blocks and feel confident.

And if you've ever been to one of my talks before you've probably heard how I see confidence.

It's probably different from anything you've ever seen.

I don't see confidence as important before you do things.

When I was learning to drive a car,

I didn't have any confidence driving a car.

When I went on my first date,

I didn't have any confidence about dating.

When I went travelling,

I didn't have any confidence about travelling.

We don't have confidence.

We don't need to have it before we do things.

A lot of people say I'm going to wait until I'm ready or when it feels right,

When I get a signal from someone up there or whatever.

I'm going to wait,

I'm going to wait until it feels right,

Until I have that feeling.

How long are you going to wait?

I used to wait for a long time.

I was waiting for a long long time.

I was waiting until I was ready,

Until I felt right,

Until it was a good timing.

You know,

Good timing is what we say.

It's not good timing right now.

In the future it will be.

Maybe there is something to that.

I'm not disregarding everything.

I'm not regarding wise choices.

Depends on the situation.

But what I am saying is,

If you wait for things forever and ever and ever and wait for yourself to feel ready,

It might not ever come.

Courage means you are feeling the fear and doing it anyway,

Just like that book.

It means you are willing to endure pain and your mind telling you not to.

Everything in your body saying no,

Your mind saying no,

But the inner part of you is kind of cheering you on and saying come on,

Come on,

You can go for it.

It's like a really quiet voice.

It's like whispering and saying come on,

Come on,

Come on,

Go for it.

You have to really listen to be able to hear that voice,

Right?

So courage,

Once you have the lights on and you tap into courage,

Courage is going against everything that you think.

There's a lot of people I meet who are,

For example,

Like coaches in my community.

You would think that they have everything figured out.

They might act like they got everything figured out,

But a lot of them are still scared.

Public speakers,

They look so confident,

But maybe they are still scared before they go on stage.

They just use courage to say you know what,

I'm going to go for it.

And then after a few minutes you are fine.

Once you are moving,

Once you are moving,

Once you are moving.

It's like that bridge I said at the beginning,

Once you get across that bridge of thinking and you are in action,

Then it's a different story.

So that's why that comes on to the last point.

Lights,

Courage and action.

Action definitely takes you from thinking to creating.

Because action is movement.

Is getting something going from it being stagnant,

Feeling stagnant,

Your life feeling stagnant,

Something feeling stagnant,

To actually moving.

And action doesn't have to be,

Here's where most people get it wrong actually,

Or not wrong let's not use that word.

Here's where people are sometimes misunderstood.

Thinking that action is like this,

I have to take the big leap,

I have to go for the big leap,

It feels like such a big step.

Well what if it doesn't have to be a big step?

I think in tiny steps,

Whenever I'm working with a client,

I know that if we try and say something massive,

Then they're going to be overwhelmed by that.

Because our brains don't like that big step stuff.

Sometimes they do,

So this is where I'm not saying in every occasion it's true,

But in general if you break that down and say okay,

One year's time,

I always ask people this,

One year's time,

If everything went right,

Where would you be?

Three years time,

If everything went right,

Where would you be?

And I actually ask people,

25 years time,

Tell me where you are.

I take them that far.

Because that draws out insights,

And they will realize what's important to them.

What's important to you if you think about 25 years from now?

Write that down and ask yourself this,

You don't have to do it right now,

But I want you to,

After this,

Do you listen to this?

Just spend 5 minutes,

No more than that.

Just imagine I was in front of you,

And I said,

Hey,

25 years time,

What would you love to create for the next 25 years?

You have 25 years to do it,

Ask yourself that,

It's my challenge to you.

Probably never been asked this by anyone in your life.

That's why sometimes people love having these conversations with me,

Because I throw them these deep questions,

To draw out the insights.

Because then we bring that insight back and we say okay,

How about in the next 6 months?

Now you've learnt what's important to you,

How about in the next 6 months?

How about in the next week?

What can you do?

I can do these 3 small things.

For example,

I was coaching someone today,

And she's going into business now,

So she's hired me to figure out what to do,

What kind of ideas does she have,

What can she bring to the world,

She's very much in that explorative stage,

So she doesn't really know what to do,

She just knows that she doesn't want to do the same old thing,

She wants a little side thing to work on.

Just a little side project,

Right?

So I said okay,

I call you up.

Call you up in 3 years time.

Everything went amazing.

What would you be saying to me?

And she said all of these huge plans of I found a partner,

I am living in a place near the coast,

I have a business,

I am leading other women now,

And all these exciting ideas came through.

And she was beaming,

She was saying this,

No one's ever asked her anything like this before in her life.

And asking herself wasn't helping,

Because your mind will trap you in your own questions,

Right?

It will turn into this cycle,

The fear will speak to you instead.

But I was in front of her,

So she has no choice.

I was helping her get the best out of herself,

Right?

So then we brought that back to this week,

And I said okay,

What has to happen?

One tiny step.

And she said,

Yeah,

Just reaching out to 5 different people.

Having conversations with them.

And then I said what else?

And she said okay,

Well,

I can brainstorm,

I can create a document of my wisdom,

What I know.

And that was it.

That's her small steps,

Her actions.

And now she knows that's all she has to focus on.

These tiny things continuously over the next week,

The next week,

The next week.

You see,

This thing about our mind getting in the way isn't really a thing when we break it down and we make it simple.

It will take her courage to create these things,

It will take all of us courage to create any change.

Whatever it is,

It's not just to do with career,

It's to do with relationships,

It's to do with just knowing yourself more,

It's to do with fears and blocks that you have.

That takes courage.

Because you've known this thing for maybe your whole life,

Right?

You've known these patterns for maybe your whole life.

So your mind is not going to give you that so easily.

But it's easier than you think.

Once you move out of thinking,

Much easier.

So those are the three things.

Lights,

Turn the lights on inside.

What lights you up?

Light yourself up somehow.

Because the mind doesn't,

It moves away.

Moves out of the way once you're lit up from the heart.

Courage,

Doing things that feel uncomfortable and scary.

Not everyone speaks about this,

They speak about confidence.

You need to have the confidence,

You need to be fearless.

Okay,

Try that.

But that doesn't work all the time for everyone.

There's still a part of everyone who has a bit of doubt.

So if you go for,

I have to be fearless and fully confident,

Then you're just cutting yourself short.

Because then you'll say,

Oh no,

I have a bit of doubt,

So I've got to stop.

I don't have the confidence thing,

I've still got this doubt,

So I'm not at confidence yet.

No,

Courage gets rid of all of that.

Courage is just feeling like you are okay to endure the discomfort because something more powerful is working through you that wants to get to the other side of that bridge,

Like I said.

And thank you for saying that bridge,

M in Canada.

One federation bridge,

Yes.

And you can create anything.

I don't care what challenge you have.

I can genuinely say that if I spoke to anyone,

I can help them move past any challenge.

Because it's the same thing all the time,

It's the mental blocks that are occurring.

And it's feeling like something is bigger than it is.

It's a lot of like fears coming through.

If you break that down to,

Hey what can I do,

That's the tiniest step,

This size,

This size,

This size,

Then your fears can't really speak to that.

Your fears are kind of confused,

They're like,

Oh,

That's the tiniest step,

It's fine.

I'll let that one go.

I won't stop you from doing that tiny step because it doesn't mean anything.

So it's like you've hacked into your system by just making it simple for yourself.

And then also lighting yourself up,

Like that power is much more powerful than your mind.

Because that's coming from a deeper source,

Your heart,

Soul,

Whatever you want to call that.

And then action.

We are action.

Like quite literally we're action.

Look,

The sun rises and it helps us to wake up.

What's happening is an action of the sun.

And then it turns dark and then we go to sleep.

That's an action.

We eat food,

That's an action.

Our body is digesting,

Even now,

You've eaten dinner,

There's actions going on inside.

There's something constantly happening,

Our breath in and out,

Action.

Breath comes in,

We get oxygen that replenishes us,

It goes out and gets rid of the crap.

Same thing is happening constantly,

There's actions.

So if you believe that you are stuck ever,

It's not true.

You just have to go with what's happening in your nature.

You have to realize,

Look,

Nothing is stuck ever.

Stuck doesn't exist.

It's like me saying,

You know when people say I am this,

I am stupid,

I am lazy,

I am whatever.

That doesn't exist.

You can't even say that.

Maybe you're feeling this way right now.

Maybe you're feeling sad,

Maybe you're having feelings of joy or discomfort.

If you use the word I am,

It doesn't actually make sense.

Because I am not,

It's like saying I am a table.

It's a noun.

It's using a noun.

It doesn't make sense.

We can't be nouns.

Because like I said,

There's something going on within our body all the time.

We're verbs.

We're actually verbs.

So this is going a bit deeper.

But I want you to just,

I don't know,

I want to see if something is sinking in or something is clicking.

Because whenever I speak,

Like I said,

I don't have any agenda or I don't know what I'm going to say.

But I want to say things that have been helpful for me and people I've been working with.

And if any insights come up for you,

Something new you've heard,

Instead of like you're listening for just agreement for okay I already know that fine.

No,

Something new that's just been like oh,

Hmm,

Never thought of it like that.

Then that means something's going on for you.

So I want to see in the chat what's coming up for everyone as I say all that.

So how do you tap into light in the midst of overwhelm?

That was the question.

Here's the thing.

It's going to sound tricky sometimes to do.

But if every day you tap into something that is going to make your day enjoyable,

Something maybe you just have,

Something,

One thing,

Then you'll realize like your body might slow down.

And yeah,

When there's overwhelm going on,

When it feels like it's too much,

That's the time where you have to make more time for these things,

For these slowing down.

There's no excuse to say you don't have time.

Any time,

If anyone ever says that to me,

I'll find time for them somehow.

Because I'm not saying anyone needs to go and find a tree to meditate under for days until they become enlightened.

I'm not saying to do any of that.

I'm just saying like find something,

Some small way to tap into yourself to slow down.

Like five minutes.

If you say you don't have five minutes,

You are lying.

Because you have five minutes to go to the bathroom to make a drink,

You have five minutes.

Probably have more.

But start with that.

So in the midst of overwhelm,

If you're actually feeling overwhelmed in that moment,

Here's an example.

Someone actually I've been talking to recently,

She was telling me with her challenges of anxiety,

She was saying she's going to a place to eat and before they went in she was feeling anxiety.

So she said I'll be back,

Just go inside,

I'll be there in a minute.

I've got to make a phone call.

But instead she just wanted to have some time to herself to just breathe for five minutes.

So she sat there outside just breathing.

Just breathing.

Just breathing slowly.

For five minutes.

And then she was just like,

Ah,

Okay,

I feel lighter.

And she continued.

So if you're feeling some kind of overwhelm,

It's your responsibility to do something about it.

Nobody else is going to come and save you.

No one.

This is like,

And this is a deep one sometimes for people because there is a part of us,

You know,

We grew up as children.

So there's always this tiny part of us which is waiting for someone to come and say everything is going to be okay.

Waiting for it.

But again,

Like I said before,

How long are you going to wait for these things?

Own it.

This is up to you.

It's up to you.

You have to make this happen.

Whatever change you want,

You have to make this happen.

What are you willing to do?

What are you willing to commit to send your life from okay,

Everything's fine,

Everything's okay to just lift up because that's possible.

And maybe your life is great right now but what little small tweaks can you make to turn good to great?

Probably just a small few tweaks.

It's the mind that gets in the way.

Reach for the skies they say.

You can reach for the skies by doing some small things.

Everyone.

This is why I wanted to become a coach and not just a meditation teacher because meditation is,

Yeah,

This is how I got out of anxiety.

Meditation yoga,

The path,

You can call it.

It helped me so much to slow down and become present.

But now I want to maximize the potential and live in a full expression of ourselves instead.

I don't want to just be slowed down and okay it's fine,

I'm calm,

I'm slow.

We still have this excitement and aliveness in us that we can tap into,

A lot more potential.

So why I became a coach was to help people bring themselves into like the best,

Best version.

So there's no regrets after that.

There's no more regrets.

You're living your life of no regrets.

Imagine that.

And why I say this is because I remember having a lot of years passed by in my life and I'd be like,

Oh another year's gone.

Oh it's Christmas already.

Even look at it now,

It's three months.

And then Christmas would come and I'd be like,

Oh I can't believe where the year's gone.

How fast time flies.

I can't believe it.

Or it would be my birthday and I'd be sad.

I'd be like,

Oh my god,

Another year?

Wow.

How time flies.

Where's all my time going?

I didn't have anything to really say about my year.

It was just passing me by.

And Christmas I would feel sad and bored,

Birthday's the same.

Whereas now,

I look back and say,

Wow,

Like what?

Wow.

I created that year.

I created that.

Look at what I did this year.

Wow.

And I'm not pushing myself to limits where I'm not enjoying my life,

You know.

I'm not a workaholic.

Yes,

I work hard but I'm always smiling and having fun doing all this stuff.

I'm in the present,

I'm having fun,

I'm going through it.

So what I want to encourage everyone here is to tap into that full expression of yourself but whilst being present.

So when you have your next birthday and your next Christmas,

You're not going to be like,

Oh,

I can't believe that,

Wow,

Another year's gone by.

Where's the time going?

When you have a life of full expression and you are really owning your life and there's no regrets,

Then you look back at your year and be like,

Wow,

Like what another year?

I'm celebrating.

I'm celebrating another year passing by.

Like that's,

I could never have imagined that in the past.

I would never celebrate years passing by.

So that's what I want to say to you guys.

Courage means that you say,

Look,

I thought I couldn't do this but I could.

Look,

I thought I was stuck but I'm not.

Look,

I thought that,

I thought I'd have anxiety forever but I've made a tiny improvement because I've spent this year working on it.

I thought I wouldn't be able to create a side hustle or a business ever but look,

I've done a little bit of it,

Well done,

For taking the step and going through.

Yeah,

Maybe I could have done a few more things but look,

I'm still doing,

I'm still moving forward.

Move forward and you have no regrets.

There's no way your mind can do anything with that.

Your mind cannot.

I sometimes say the monkey mind,

I'm not giving the monkey mind any bananas.

Not giving that monkey any bananas to say,

Hey,

Look Raj,

You could have done better.

Look Raj,

Another year's passed by.

Look Raj,

You're getting older.

Look Raj,

You could have done this.

Look Raj,

All these monkey thoughts.

Sorry monkey,

You're not getting any bananas.

Just imagine that life.

You don't need anything else in your life if you have this feeling that I'm talking about.

If you tap into this courage and you are present and enjoying your life in this way,

You don't need anything.

You don't need to buy anything.

You don't need to go on any vacations.

You need nothing at this point because you have full inner peace.

You're living in a full expression of yourself.

You know in yoga when they say,

Do the full expression of the pose.

Go for the full expression.

That's what I'm talking about here.

Go for the full expression of your life.

Okay,

I went into another flow.

I'm going to pause there.

I'm going to leave it there.

I want you guys to ask me questions before we end.