How Do You Know If You Are Meditating Correctly?

How do you know if you are meditating correctly?

How do you know if you've done a good job?

But by what measure do we judge a meditation practice?

These are some of the questions that I've been contemplating recently.

Because the more I teach and write about and discuss the idea of meditation,

Inevitably people will come back to me and say,

Oh,

I had a bad meditation session,

Or I just can't get into it,

Or I'm not feeling it today.

And whilst on one level these sentiments are legitimate and worth sort of breaking down and working through,

On another level they sort of sidestep or completely miss the whole point of meditation.

In general,

The overarching sort of goal or methodology of mindfulness meditation is to observe the contents of consciousness as it is for what it is,

Without judgment and without filter.

We just observe what arises and then watch it pass.

So by that definition,

Any feelings that come about during or after the meditation session,

The formal practice,

Are themselves just mere arising in consciousness.

The feeling of,

I've done a good job meditating today,

Or that was a bad meditation session,

Are themselves feelings to observe.

If you're meditating and you get this feeling of bliss,

That itself isn't a sign that you're meditating correctly.

All that is,

Is what your current meditation and mental state is suggesting.

You're feeling blissful,

So observe it.

If you feel angry and frustrated and overwhelmed,

That isn't a sign of a bad meditation session.

That's just what your mental state is projecting.

That's just how you're feeling right now.

That's just a thing to observe,

To watch,

To investigate,

And then to let go of.

From the point of view of consciousness,

It's all the same.

It's all a part of it.

This is a little bit esoteric and perhaps a bit more advanced than what I would usually sort of discuss here.

But it's important because as long as we are engaging with the practice,

We're doing it correctly.

It might feel good.

It might feel bad.

It might feel neutral.

Your emotions might chop and change.

They might be steady.

Your focus may be on point or it might be varied.

But provided you're engaging with the practice,

You're doing the practice.

How you feel about it is irrelevant,

Provided you're observing those feelings.

In leading into today's little sit that we're going to do,

I just want you to hold that in mind that whatever arises and how you're feeling about the arising of those feelings,

Of those thoughts,

The mental states,

All of that sort of stuff,

Everything that pops into your mind is something to be observed,

Is a part of the practice.

Holding your mind that you can only have the meditation that you're having.

And provided you're engaging with the practice,

You're doing the practice.

So we're just going to sit with this concept.

You can only have the meditation you're having for a couple of minutes.

I'm going to go silent and you'll just close your eyes.

Take a deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth.

Enjoy your attention to your meditation object,

Most commonly the breath at the nose.

When your mind wanders,

You just bring it back to that point of focus,

The sensations of the breath entering and leaving the nose.

And you're just going to remember,

Whatever arises,

Good,

Bad or neutral,

It's okay.

It's a part of it and you're doing it correctly.

After the couple of minutes of silence,

We'll do a little discussion to debrief.

Are you ready?

Take that breath,

Draw your attention to the sensations entering and leaving your nose.

And let's begin.

You you you you Okay,

So how'd you go?

That was only a couple of minutes of silence and you might have been super focused or not focused at all.

You might have felt feelings of bliss or its opposite.

You might have been lost in thought,

You might have had memories,

Or you might have felt every single motion of the breath at the nose.

Whatever you felt,

It's right.

Whatever you felt,

It is the practice.

You can only have the meditation you're having.

So what I want you to do for the rest of the day and ongoing with your practice is to just hold that in mind.

You can only have the meditation you're having and provided you are observing things mindfully,

You're doing it correctly.

And it's here that I would like to suggest that there isn't necessarily or there shouldn't be or there doesn't have to be a gap between formal practice and the rest of your life.

As the session comes to a close,

It's tempting to just sort of switch off that mindfulness button,

Switch off our focus and just sort of drift.

But really,

What's the point of our practice if not to take it into the real world?

We exercise in the gym to be strong and fit for real life.

We study so that we can learn and apply those skills in real life.

And in the same way,

We practice mindfulness to get the benefits in our everyday life.

So for the rest of the day,

When things pop up in your mind,

When you noticed a strong sense of emotionality,

Good or bad,

When you notice a lack of focus or hyperfocus,

Just take a moment to step back,

Take a breath and observe your mind mindfully in that moment.

Because every opportunity,

Every moment is an opportunity for mindful observation and there doesn't need to be a gap between a formal sit like this one and the rest of our life.

So if you like,

You can continue sitting in silence and try that again.

Try the idea that you can only have the meditation you're having,

Focusing on the breath like we did during this practice or you can sign off.

Either way,

I wish you well for the rest of your day.

Cheers!