Hi,
How are you today?
If you're here,
You may be caught in that familiar perfectionist spiral.
Replaying a conversation,
Criticising yourself for a small mistake,
Or feeling nothing like you do is quite good enough.
I know this pattern immediately.
In the film industry,
Perfectionism felt like protection.
If I could just control every detail,
Anticipate every problem,
Then I'd be safe from criticism or failure.
But here's what I've learned.
Perfection isn't actually about high standards.
It's your nervous system's way of trying to keep you safe from rejection or judgement.
And while it may have served you in some ways,
It's also exhausting your system.
Let's interrupt this pattern right now.
First,
Place one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly.
If it's comfortable for you,
Close your eyes so you can fully focus.
Feel the rise and fall of your breath.
Now,
I want you to say this to yourself.
I'm having a perfectionist moment.
And that's okay.
My brain is just trying to protect me.
Think about the situation that's bothering you.
Instead of asking,
What did I do wrong?
Or,
How could I have done it better?
Try asking,
What did I learn?
And how can I be kind to myself right now?
Take three breaths with me.
On each exhale,
We're going to release the need to be perfect.
Again,
With your eyes closed,
Drop into your body.
As you breathe in,
Take your breath down into your belly.
Let your belly expand.
And as you breathe out,
Release the fear of making mistakes.
Breathe in,
Down into your belly.
Let your chest relax.
And breathe out,
Releasing the need to control how others see you.
Breathe into your belly.
And breathing out,
Releasing the belief that your worth depends on being flawless.
Now,
Imagine speaking to yourself the way you'd speak to a good friend who made the same mistake.
What would you say to them?
You should have done better.
What would you say to them?
How would your voice sound?
Here's the truth.
Your perfectionism has gotten you far,
But it doesn't need to drive the bus anymore.
You can keep your high standards while being kind to yourself.
You can strive for excellence while accepting that you're human.
For the rest of today,
Try this.
When you notice perfectionistic thoughts arising,
Just pause and ask,
What would self-compassion look like right now?
Maybe it's taking a breath before responding to an email.
Maybe it's acknowledging that you did your best with the information you had.
Maybe it's simply saying,
Good enough,
And moving on.
Your worth isn't determined by your performance.
You are valuable exactly as you are,
Mistakes,
Imperfections,
And all.
Small shifts in self-compassion stack up over time.
You're rewiring decades of patterns.
So be patient with yourself.
You've got this.
