Sometimes,
We have flashbacks to a younger self in scenarios,
Frankly,
We wish had never happened.
We can feel the shame,
Sadness,
Anger and sometimes disgust towards ourselves rise up in our bodies.
It's not easy.
The scenarios play out in our minds and all the key players are present and yet somehow our judgment is reserved for our younger self.
I've thought about this lots in recent years and in recent years I've also spent a lot of time reading and listening to very wise people,
Kind people and learning to reparent myself in a way and there's one thing that for many of us I think it's useful to remember and to accept is that our younger selves were without the necessary guidance to make positive choices and our younger selves were without the necessary guidance to maintain healthy boundaries.
So quite often the scenarios that we get flashbacks about,
The scenes that play out in our heads that make us cringe internally,
That we want to push away,
Happened because our younger selves just simply didn't have the guidance that they needed.
Lots of things have happened and some of these things we feel ashamed about,
Regretful about,
Angry about and things happen that should not have happened.
We weren't always safe.
That's the reality but let us in the spirit of love,
In the spirit of moving forward and in the spirit of being very well aware that we are blessed with a short earthly existence,
Let us explore together through a softer,
More realistic and more forgiving lens how we might reframe what's happened.
Turning the attention inward now,
Making yourself comfortable,
Closing the eyes if it feels comfortable,
Placing one hand on your body,
Palm towards your body,
So it might be on your leg,
It might be on the other hand on your abdomen and this is really for kind of tangible support and comfort.
Knowing that if at any stage we feel overwhelmed in this or any other practice,
We can always come back to the supportive hand,
To what is real and comforting in the here and now.
Feeling the breath in the body,
Settling,
Open to seeing what comes up for you,
Knowing that you're safe and comfortable in this moment.
Visualizing now bringing to life in your mind's eye a younger you that needs to be forgiven,
Bringing to mind in your mind's eye a younger you that you don't feel great about.
See if you can spend a few moments putting this younger you and the situations they found themselves in into context,
With kindness,
Understanding they were doing what they could with the tools and support and awareness that they had or did not have at that time.
Seeing what comes up for you,
Sometimes underneath the frustration,
The guilt,
Shame is a deep sadness for what was not in place for you at that time.
Your younger self needed love,
Guidance and support.
Acknowledge what was,
Not pushing your past away,
But very gently reframing it.
Your younger self is not at fault,
They simply did not have what they needed back then.
Things are different now though,
And you can release.
Now you can tell your younger self all the things you wish someone had told you then.
Forgive yourself,
Forgive all the you's,
Past,
Present,
There's no other way.
In your mind's eye now,
Visualize yourself as you are today,
As you are today,
Sitting alongside your younger self.
You might like to take their hand,
And you might like to embrace them.
The sensing what they need from you and what they need to hear.
Resting for a moment now,
Noticing what you feel,
Just noticing.
Life is long and complex,
And it's likely you'll need to come back to this practice or similar work as time goes on.
This is just one step in a larger journey.
The most important thing is that today we've taken the step towards reframing and acknowledging,
So that next time you get a flashback to a situation or scenario that you wish you'd handled differently,
That you wish had never happened,
A situation that you wish your younger self had never found themselves in,
You can look at it through a slightly kinder lens.
Accepting how it makes you feel,
But also extending love to that version of you who simply didn't have what they need.
Accepting and embracing all versions of yourself,
Slowly coming back to the space around you now,
To the environment that you're in in this present moment,
Very slowly.
When you're ready,
Opening your eyes.
Thank you so much for practicing with me today.
