Hi and welcome.
I will be guiding you through today's meditation practice for the next 20 minutes or so.
You can start by finding your way into a comfortable position with a long spine,
Either seated or lying down.
Grab any props that may help you settle deeper into this moment.
Maybe a blanket or an eye mask,
A pillow below the knees.
Take some time now honoring however feels best for your body today.
When you're ready you can close your eyes or soften your gaze,
Anchoring into the ground beneath you and just meeting this moment exactly as you are right now.
Noting any sounds you may hear.
Maybe the temperature of the room.
How your clothes meet your body.
And any smells that may be lingering.
Just settling in here.
Focusing now on the natural pace of your breath.
If your thoughts fight for your attention throughout this practice,
Try to just watch them from afar.
Almost as if they're a cloud passing that eventually dissolves into the distance.
Same with any sounds that may come up unexpectedly.
Let them come up and then let that moment pass,
Coming right back to the breath.
Observing the way your belly rises and falls.
And the expansion of your chest with each breath.
For the next few rounds of breathing,
I invite you to extend your exhale longer than your inhale,
Even if just by one count.
I like to inhale for four and exhale for five,
But do what feels best for you today.
Releasing the count now and the extended exhale and returning back to the natural rhythm of breathing.
Letting go of any tension.
Lately I've been in a season of feeling quite restless and not very grounded in some areas of my life.
Knowing that change is needed,
But not knowing where to start.
I've been thinking if I just look at my problem or my situations long enough or close enough,
I'll find my solution.
Which reminded me of a conversation with my therapist a couple of years ago.
And at the time I couldn't get my body and my mind to settle.
And I was in this extremely heavy space of grief and confusion.
My plans changed and my future looked unfamiliar.
I was unsure of who I even really was underneath it all,
Not knowing what move to make next or how to make a move.
And when I was finally able to come to a pause,
My therapist asked,
What do you know about butterflies and their life cycles?
She went on to say that in order for a caterpillar to transform into a butterfly,
It has to go through this crucial stage where it essentially becomes goo.
The caterpillar wraps itself into its silk cocoon,
Settles in,
And slowly dissolves into a liquid while the nest holds all the nutrients it needs to later evolve into a butterfly.
Any sudden movements to the cocoon during this state could keep it from fully developing into the beautiful butterflies we see fluttering around in the springs and the summers.
It's as if the only job while in this gooey state is to retreat.
It won't survive without the rest.
So she encouraged me to be the goo.
To give myself permission to put down the planning,
The problem solving,
And the need to know any of the answers and let this process unfold naturally.
Reminding me the caterpillar doesn't do anything or even know it's becoming a butterfly.
It simply just is what it is in the moment.
So I wrote be the goo on post-its around my house and I did just that.
I listened.
I released.
I gave myself what I needed and I released some more.
And slowly I began to trust.
And looking back now,
I can see the life I knew and the person I thought I was was actually dissolving away.
It was a shedding that required me to get still in order to make space for what was to emerge.
Looking back now has taught me that we're in a constant state of becoming.
This rearrangement that is a transformation we aren't even aware of while it's happening.
But so often we get in our own way seeking safety and control.
So we're going to transition into a body scan where we can dissolve away any tension that may be keeping us from fully retreating or giving ourselves what we need.
A chance to be the goo.
As we scan through each part of the body,
I invite you to imagine a light just above your head.
And this light can be whatever color feels most comforting to you today,
Right now.
And as this light scans over your body,
Imagine it bringing this warmth that has the power to slowly dissolve away any tension stored in the area it touches or hovers over.
Imagining that light now above your head.
Having it move all the way down to your forehead.
Clearing away any racing thoughts and just turning down the volume here.
Scanning down,
Creating some space between your eyebrows in case they furrowed without noticing.
Moving towards your eyes and maybe even giving a quick flutter,
Letting your eyelids fall more comfortably.
As the light extends down your face,
Unclench your jaw.
Sometimes I find my chin slightly dropping to make some more space in my mouth and allowing for the tongue to also drop from the roof of the mouth.
Scanning down towards your throat.
Letting any of the muck that sometimes stores here dissolve away and just fill with that light.
It might even feel nurturing to swallow here.
Following what feels right for your body.
Arriving now on your neck and your shoulders.
Seeing where you can lengthen the space between the two.
Widening the space of your collarbone.
Extending the light towards your heart space.
An area that can hold on so much from the past.
Sometimes even using energy here to prep for the future.
Sending your breath here to release it and fill with warmth and with light.
Slowly stretching that light towards your belly.
And your hips.
With the light stretching down your legs.
Slowly moving to your feet.
All the way to the tips of your toes.
By now your whole body is wrapped in this light.
Your very own cocoon of safety and stillness.
Using a few moments here to extend this light back to any areas of your body that maybe we moved on from too quickly.
While you're in this space,
I invite you to reflect on the following questions.
Where can you stop forcing and invite rest in instead?
What are some ways you can tend to your heart and make more space for what feels good?
What would you do if you could trust your life was unsteady?
What would you do if you could trust your life was unfolding in your favor?
Releasing these now.
I offer you permission to relieve yourself from needing to have all of the answers.
I'm often reminded of the words a mentor once shared where she said,
It takes courage to stay the course even when it feels like nothing is happening.
Taking a few deep breaths here before getting ready to awaken to the room and maybe even emerging with something we may not have had or have known before.
One more deep breath here.
Beginning to wiggle our toes and our legs.
Bringing a slight movement to our hips.
And moving our arms now,
Maybe even lengthening them besides you like a wing getting ready to break through the cocoon that's falling away.
Lightly shaking your head from side to side like you're saying no.
And again as if you're nodding yes.
And when you're ready you can open your eyes.
Thank you for showing up today for yourself.
Sending lots of love and gratitude your way.
