Beyond Self-Judgment And The Stories Of The Mind

Welcome,

Take your time to arrive.

There's no need to feel any particular way for this to be helpful.

You do not have to be calm or centered or settled before we begin.

However you are,

However your mind is,

However your body feels,

It is all completely welcome here.

Begin by letting your attention move towards the simple fact that you are being supported.

Notice what you are sitting on or lying on,

Feel the contact points,

The weight of your body resting down,

The steadiness underneath you that does not demand anything in return.

You do not have to earn this support,

You do not have to perform for it,

It is simply here holding you.

If it feels comfortable,

Allow the body to soften just a fraction more into that support.

No need to look for a perfect position,

No need to hold yourself in a particular way.

Let your body be as it wants to be and let that be enough.

Now gently bring your awareness to your breathing,

There is nothing to change.

Let the breath be exactly as it is.

Notice the inhale as it arrives,

However long or short it may be.

Notice the exhale as it leaves,

With whatever pace it chooses.

Perhaps you feel the breath at the nostrils,

Cool as it comes in,

Slightly warmer as it goes out.

Perhaps you notice the rise and fall of the chest or the gentle lift of the belly.

Choose one place that feels natural and allow your attention to rest there for a while.

Thoughts will almost certainly continue in the background.

They may comment on the meditation,

On your day,

On something that has not happened yet.

They may judge how you are doing this.

They may even tell you that you should be more present than you are.

All of that is simply thought being thought.

You are not required to stop it.

You are only invited to notice that thinking is happening.

And then return again and again to the simplicity of the breath and body.

Take another gentle breath now.

Let yourself feel the whole arc of the inhale from beginning to end.

And the whole arc of the exhale from beginning to end.

Nothing to fix.

Nothing to improve.

Just noticing.

From here,

Begin to include more of the body in your awareness.

Notice your feet resting where they are.

Notice the weight of your legs.

Notice your hands,

Perhaps resting in your lap or by your side.

Notice your shoulders,

Your neck,

Your jaw.

You may become aware of areas that feel tight or heavy.

A pulling in the chest.

A knot in the stomach.

A heaviness behind the eyes.

You may also notice areas that feel soft or open.

Everything you find is welcome.

Self-judgment and stress often show up in the body before they show up in conscious thought.

The body responds to the feeling of pressured thinking.

Even when you have not noticed the story behind it yet.

So for a few moments,

Simply let the body speak.

Let it tell you how it is,

Without needing to translate that into words.

Now,

Gently widen your awareness to include the stories of the mind.

You might notice familiar themes.

I should be further ahead.

I did that wrong.

Other people are doing better than me.

I'm not good enough in some way.

You do not have to repeat these sentences exactly.

You may just notice the flavor of them.

The way they return again and again in slightly different forms.

These are the stories that tend to wrap themselves around self-judgment.

From a three principles understanding,

Every one of these stories is created by thought in the moment.

That does not mean they feel light.

They can feel heavy and convincing.

They can come with a strong physical sensation and an emotional charge.

Yet they are still movements of thought,

Appearing and disappearing,

Just like all other thoughts.

Take another easy breath.

Let the breath remind you of something quieter and more reliable than any story.

You are being lived,

Moment by moment,

By a deeper intelligence that does not need you to manage every thought.

If it feels okay,

Choose one recurring self-judging story and hold it gently in your awareness for a second or two.

Not as something to climb into,

But as something to look at from a little distance.

Almost as if you're holding a photograph at arm's length.

You can see it,

But you're not inside it.

Then let the photograph fall away and return to the breath.

Return to the feeling of your body resting here.

The story may still be somewhere in the background,

But you are not giving it the same attention.

You are resting as something larger than the story.

This is one of the most important shifts we can experience.

The realization that we are not our stories.

We are the awareness in which stories appear.

We are the space in which thought comes and goes.

We are the sky,

Not the changing weather.

Spend a little time sensing that now.

Thoughts may still pass through.

Feelings may still move.

The body may still hold some tension.

Yet all of this is appearing within awareness,

Not defining it.

Awareness itself remains steady and unchanged.

If you notice that the mind has pulled you back into another story,

There is no problem.

You can simply recognize that this has happened and gently guide your attention back.

Back to the sensation of the breath.

Back to the support beneath you.

Back to the felt sense of this very moment.

Notice how thought loves to travel into the past and into the future.

It replays scenes from years ago and turns them into evidence for what it believes about you.

It imagines scenes that have not yet happened and treats them as if they are already real.

It takes these pictures and wraps them in judgment.

Gently notice that every one of these past and future scenes is being experienced now as thought.

The only place they exist is here,

As images and words in your mind.

You do not need to fight with them or push them away.

You can see them as you might see a film projected on a wall.

Clear,

Perhaps emotional,

Perhaps powerful,

And yet still made only of light and shadow.

Return again to the felt sense of now.

Feel the contact of your body with the surface beneath you.

Feel the rhythm of your breathing.

Feel the subtle aliveness in your hands or feet.

Rest for a few moments in what is actually happening,

Rather than what the stories say is happening.

You may begin to notice a little more space around your inner commentary.

The self-judging voice may not feel quite as close.

It may not feel quite as loud.

There may be moments when it goes quiet altogether without you doing anything to make that happen.

This space is not something you have manufactured.

It appears naturally as you spend less time inside the stories and more time in presence.

It is the spaciousness of your true nature being revealed.

Take another slow breath.

Let the exhale feel like a small letting go.

Let the inhale feel like a gentle opening.

Nothing dramatic is needed.

Just these tiny movements are enough.

From within this space,

Notice the difference between the voice of judgment and the quieter sense of wisdom.

Self-judgment tends to rut.

It pushes and nags and insists.

It creates pressure.

Wisdom feels very different.

It moves slowly.

It feels simpler and obvious.

It brings a sense of ease,

Even if it points to something that once felt scary.

You do not need to go looking for wisdom right now.

You do not need to strain to hear it.

Just know that as the stories of the mind become less compelling,

The deeper intelligence of life has more room to be noticed.

Rest again in the body.

In the breath.

In the awareness that is simply here,

Witnessing everything.

If another wave of self-judgment arises,

See if you can meet it with a little understanding.

You might say quietly to yourself,

There is that story again.

That is all.

No self-criticism for having a thought.

No need to investigate it.

Just a gentle noticing.

And then a soft return to present.

You are showing your system again and again that it is safe to let thought come and go.

Safe to feel what you feel.

Safe to rest as awareness rather than the content of your thinking.

For the next little while,

Simply rest in the spaciousness beneath thinking.

If thoughts arise,

Let them pass through.

If feelings move,

Let them be felt.

Keep returning to the breath.

To the body.

To the simplicity of now.

Nothing special has to happen here.

You do not need a big realization for this to be valuable.

Even a slight sense of more room,

A touch more softness,

A hint of quiet is more than enough.

Feel the steadiness that has been here throughout.

Feel how your body has been held.

Feel how your breath has been breathing you.

Feel how awareness has been quietly present,

Whether you were noticing it or not.

Before we close,

Acknowledge gently that you have just spent time resting as yourself,

Beyond self-judgment,

Beyond the stories of the mind.

You have not had to fix anything about yourself.

You have simply seen a little more clearly how experience is being created.

Know that you can return to this space whenever you need to.

The stories will continue to come and go,

But you are not limited to them.

You can pause.

Feel the body.

Notice the breath.

Rest again in awareness.

When you feel ready,

Begin to bring your awareness back to the room around you.

Notice any sounds.

Notice the quality of the light,

Even if your eyes are closed.

Notice the support beneath your body once more.

Take one last gentle breath.

Let the inhale rise.

Let the exhale fall.

You can carry this sense of spaciousness with you into whatever comes next.

Thank you for being here,

Exactly as you are.