Healing From Anger

Anger is part of the fight-flight response common to all mammals,

And we humans are mammals.

The anger response has a purpose,

To keep us safe from danger.

However,

Many circumstances in our modern world can trigger this response to perceived threat,

And due to just how human life goes,

A part of our brains can then bring on the anger response too often and too much.

And then,

We can spill out this response onto others at wrong times.

Then,

We later regret.

The Buddha said,

You will not be punished for your anger.

You will be punished by your anger.

A contemporary author named Eckhart Tolle wrote,

Where there is anger,

There is always pain underneath.

The following meditation is designed to help your brain calm and heal so you can think,

Because one does not think well when angry.

Then,

You're in a much better place to manage your life and your anger.

So,

Let us begin by taking some time,

Finding a comfortable space,

Perhaps lying down in your bed or on a couch or seated somewhere in a comfortable position,

Inside or outside,

In a quiet place.

This relaxation exercise will help to calm you,

And then will also help you to become more open and receptive to the things you'll hear.

So first,

When you're ready,

Just go ahead and close your eyes.

That's right.

Nice and easy now.

Begin by taking a soft,

Deep breath in through your nose,

Then out through your mouth.

Let's do this to the count of four in,

And the count of eight out.

Breathing in,

One,

Two,

Filling the lungs with air,

Three,

Filling more,

Four,

Hold that for a moment.

Now exhale as I count to eight,

One,

Two,

Three,

Letting go,

Four,

Releasing,

Five,

Really letting go,

Six,

Letting out all the way,

Seven,

Really exhaling everything,

And all the way to eight.

Excellent.

Breathing in as I count to four again,

One,

Inhaling,

Two,

Filling the center of your body with air,

Three,

And your lungs,

Four,

Hold on to that just a minute,

And exhale as I count to eight,

One,

Two,

Pushing out the breath,

Three,

Letting go,

Four,

Pushing out that breath,

Five,

Really more exhaling,

Six,

Even more,

Push it out,

Push it out,

Seven,

All the way out,

Emptying,

And eight.

Excellent.

Breathing in and breathing out.

You're doing very well.

Direct your attention now to your eyes,

Your eyelids,

Your eye muscles.

Relax your eyelids and eye muscles now.

Create a sensation of deep relaxation of all the little muscles around your eyes,

Your eyelids,

Your eye muscles.

Allow that relaxed feeling to begin to multiply and to magnify and to become greater and to expand.

That's right.

Think about your forehead now.

Relax your forehead and your temples.

Relax your temples and allow that feeling of relaxation to continue to expand to your cheeks,

Your cheek muscles,

Relax the bones of your face,

Your jaw,

Your chin,

Your lips.

Think about your lips.

Relax your lips.

You might allow your lips to part just a little bit as you breathe in the fresh air of relaxation and exhale all the tension from your day.

Breathing in,

Breathing out.

Think about the floor of your mouth.

Relax all the muscles in the floor of your mouth and your chin now.

Once again,

And your jaw and your neck now.

Think about those large and small muscles in the neck there and then just relax those muscles.

And picture and imagine you could see,

Sense,

Perceive the whole area of your scalp from your hairline up or top of your head down to the nape of your neck.

Relax all the muscles on your scalp.

That's right.

And your neck.

And allow that feeling of relaxation to flow and penetrate now into the muscles of your shoulders,

The large and small muscles of your shoulders.

Relax your shoulders.

Make them soft.

As relaxed as you possibly can and then allow that relaxation to flow down into both of your arms.

From your shoulders to your elbows.

That's right.

And from your elbows down to your wrists.

You're doing well and all the way into your hands and into your fingertips.

Relaxing your whole arms from your fingertips clear up to your shoulders.

Making those arms of yours heavy,

Limp,

Rested and relaxed.

Like the arms of a ragdoll.

So heavy.

So limp.

So rested.

Like every muscle there just won't work.

Excellent.

Allow that relaxation now to flow across your abdomen.

Across your whole chest.

Allowing a feeling of comfort to settle deep,

Deep,

Deep within.

Excellent.

Then think about your shoulders now.

Relax your shoulders.

Picture and imagine something soothing,

Something restful,

Perhaps like a robe of soft velvet flowing,

Curling down around your shoulders,

Holding them safe and secure.

And as that robe moving down your back and down your spine,

Relaxing each and every muscle cell,

Nerve and fiber and all the spaces in between.

Flowing down your back,

Down the spine.

Into your hips,

Down into your thighs.

Think about both thighs now.

Relax both thighs as far as your knees.

Excellent.

Relax all the muscles of your thighs.

Feel that heaviness settle in there.

Wonderful.

Now allow that relaxation to flow on down to your ankles and all the way into both of your feet now.

All the way down to your toes.

Let your whole body relax.

Kind of drift and float.

Rest in your being.

And now imagine in front of you a beautiful place in nature.

Maybe a lovely path or trail somewhere,

Like in the mountains or among some gently rolling hills.

This could be an imaginary one or one you've seen before.

Just find this trail,

This pathway.

It's safe there.

Well marked,

Easy,

Safe to navigate.

You're all alone.

A beautiful day.

Temperature just right.

Everything quiet.

Soak it in here,

Noticing the trees,

The colors,

Shadows.

Moving along this trail,

You realize each step is easy.

Each step forward allows you to become even more quiet.

Enough to even double your feelings of relaxation.

That trail moving on downward,

Every step allowing you to relax more and more,

Deeper and deeper,

And that clearing up ahead.

Oh,

There's a beautiful pond.

Rounding the bend,

Notice how it sparkles in the sunlight,

Perhaps reflecting some puffy white clouds.

And you find a bench by this pond and decide to sit a moment to think about things,

Feeling very peaceful.

Realizing while you're there in your own life,

It could be time to make some changes,

Some shifts.

Maybe wanting to be just a little bit different.

Known to yourself and to others as a calm,

Peaceful,

Thoughtful person,

Kind,

Compassionate.

Yet some things might stand in the way.

They come into your mind as you're pondering.

A small grass basket is noticed somewhere underneath this bench.

This basket has in it a blank journal with empty pages and a pen or a pencil.

In your thoughts now,

It dawns on you that there might be some unspoken,

Unrecalled burdens left from days gone by related to this anger that you have at times.

So take a few moments here to write or jot those things down in brief phrases,

One at a time.

Just one on each page.

These things could possibly be experiences left over from childhood or sometime earlier in your life.

Maybe from your family situation,

In your school,

Maybe teasing their unkind words or even physical injury.

Perhaps these feelings even occurred because of some situation or person on a job or place of employment.

Maybe you really could not defend yourself or tell anyone at the time.

If any of these recollections is too painful,

It's okay for you to allow yourself to float above those scenes,

Almost as you're watching them in a far-off movie.

So go ahead,

Keep on writing things down,

One phrase at a time,

One page at a time.

Writing them here gets them out of your memories,

Out of your brains,

Out of your mind.

And I'll be quiet as you do so.

And then when you feel ready,

Place this journal into the basket.

This basket is actually a very special basket,

And it can actually hold and contain those thoughts that you've written down in that journal,

Every thought and every feeling,

Every emotion,

Every related dream,

In full entirety,

Everything that goes with those phrases,

Those words.

The energy in this basket can neutralize them so you can let them go.

Get rid of those experiences,

Those memories,

Those phrases,

Even the dreams about them,

Which have been perhaps subconsciously bothering you.

Now's the time to get rid of them.

Take your time.

We're not in a hurry.

Get them all in there.

And now as you gaze around on the ground nearby,

There are many,

Many stones lying around,

Stones of different weights.

Pick up one and another and another,

Adding weight to this basket.

When you're ready,

Close the basket.

Now toss it,

Throw it,

Perhaps with all your might into this pond.

Watch here what happens.

As it comes down,

Notice the splash,

The ripples in the circle.

As it goes down and as that impact ends,

Those ripples diminish.

And you can notice the sparkles on the pond and reflections of the sunlight.

Maybe hear the gentle sounds of nature.

Now in the bottom of this pond are some crystals.

Crystals hold emotion.

They work to dissolve all the negative emotion that was in that basket.

And that basket made of grass dissolves into the pond.

The pain of those yesterdays seemed to disappear like those quiet ripples in the pond.

Now it's time to rest.

Breathe easy.

Let go.

Relax.

I'll be quiet so you may do so.

Then after this time of resting,

When you feel ready,

It becomes time to move on,

Onward.

And continuing on this path around the pond,

Feeling freer and lighter perhaps than ever before.

Notice yourself feeling light and gentle pressure on your feet as you go along the next smoother part of the pathway.

Pacing yourself,

Feeling grounded as you gently move forward.

And as you round the bend there,

There's another quiet area.

It looks like a small glen.

More relaxed than you've been in a long time.

You notice here an even smaller,

Quiet,

Shallow pond,

Fed by a tiny trickling waterfall from above.

It's cool there in the shade of all those trees.

There's a bit of a sparkle about this place though.

Birds and tiny insects seem to frolic in the glimmers of the dancing sunlight.

It's safe here.

And.

.

.

There's a noticing this is a very good place to heal.

So gently entering the water as you feel ready and comfortable to do so.

Beginning there with the toes and the feet.

Now you realize that this is a warm and healing spring flanked by rocks and ferns and crystals.

The water is very,

Very clear.

Realizing it's safe here and that this is a place of solitary healing.

You find yourself venturing slowly in the shallow pond,

Lying down,

Finding a safe and cushioned place to rest the head.

This water is infused with healing energies and you find it easy to drift and float here.

Here,

A place where nothing bothers you,

Nothing disturbs you.

Always and only more calm and peaceful in mind and body.

Now that place here of inner safety,

That feeling can seep deep inside yourselves.

As new realizations come,

There might be even a possibility now to imagine what another's person's viewpoint might be.

After all,

Each one of us has a different lens from which we view this life.

The ultimate healing for deep-seated anger is forgiveness of self and others.

This is perhaps easier to think about now than ever before.

And you may call on that part of your highest,

Wisest mind to help you do so.

When you're ready,

It's time to step out of this pool,

Drying off using a soft,

Gentle towel hanging from a tree nearby,

Feeling calm,

Centered,

Energized,

Revitalized.

And as you look around,

You find a place on a mossy rock to sit still,

To think even more about things,

Pondering the meaning of what anger has done in your life.

And thinking about your own most simple steps you can take to handle a normal human emotion in the right way.

Now,

Sometimes anger can actually be the fuel to take some kind of action,

Perhaps to change something which one can change about one's life.

Maybe like taking social action for a higher cause,

Or maybe make some changes in one's life,

Moving away from the negative and on towards the positive.

This might just mean moving away in one's own inner mind,

Or it could mean making some changes in the material world,

Such as moving out and making space away from a difficult human relationship,

Or changing job circumstances,

Or locating a more pleasant environment in which to live.

Ponder these things in your life now,

And I will be quiet.

While this idea emerges from your mind.

Now there's a shift and a realization one must always take certain steps to calm the brain in immediate situations.

This becomes easier for you now than ever before.

The new pattern and pathway in your mind and brain is something like this.

Upon the very first noticing of irritation or anger,

I begin to focus on my breathing by taking slow deep breaths,

Breathing in to the count of four,

Then gently exhaling through the mouth out to the count of eight,

Like this.

Breathing in one,

Two,

Three,

Inhaling,

Four,

Filling up,

Hold it,

Breathing out one,

Two,

Letting go,

Three,

Releasing,

Four,

Letting go even more,

Five,

Really exhaling any tension that's there,

Six,

Push it all out,

Seven,

Let it all go,

Eight.

Breathing in and breathing out.

I now realize it's a kinder thing for myself and others to just remove myself from the situation in order to calm further and allow myself to think.

I move away easily and effortlessly from the irritating event while I'm taking slow deep breaths.

And in fact,

Every breath I take allows me to calm more and more,

Calming and breathing more and more,

Noticing the breath as I move along.

My anger is now being transformed into the energy it takes to take only right and loving action.

My peace of mind is as important to me as it is to others.

I am a calm,

Peaceful,

Loving person.

It is now easier than ever before for me to remain calm in the face of challenge.

I now know the steps to take and I find this easier and easier every day in every way.

Being and becoming more loving,

More calm,

More peaceful,

More kind,

More passionate,

Myself and others.

I am that calm and peaceful person I have always wanted to be.