Hi there,
Jesse here.
Welcome back to these reflections on mindfulness as a way to help us manage our brain injury symptoms.
And I welcome you wherever you are,
If you're in Fredericton or Fez,
Florence,
Fargo.
Here we are together.
And today I'd like to talk to you about and practice together a beautiful element of mindful concussion care.
And that is the idea that you are in choice.
And anytime with me or any other teacher,
I really encourage you to remember this and to know that it's so important for you to listen to what you need because everybody and everybody is different.
And to give you an example,
When I was first learning mindfulness,
There was times that teachers would invite practices that were just way too overwhelming for me.
Maybe you've experienced that as well.
And it's so normal with the brain injury for us to have very strong reactions.
When things get difficult,
We can go into kind of hyper aroused states where we're anxious or afraid or angry.
Or we can go very easily into hypo aroused states where we get foggy brained and spacey,
Depressed,
Even as much as disassociated from our bodies.
And both of those states are really wisdom in the body,
Caring for us.
Our bodies saying,
Hey,
What's happening right now is too much.
We're gonna we're gonna do something to make you care for yourself.
So in this,
It's a beautiful caring for yourself.
And it's not about coddling.
And it's not about avoiding.
It's about recognizing that because we do become easily overwhelmed,
It's so important that especially in these early days when we're learning,
That we start with anchors of attention that are pleasant or neutral.
And that for the time being,
We don't engage in practices that invite us to spend a lot of time paying intimate attention to our symptoms.
Whether it be physical or emotional or just thought patterns that are challenging.
So in this,
We're learning this such an important skill of noticing that our attention has moved off our pleasant or neutral anchor that we're practicing with and gone on to our symptoms.
And then we gently with kindness pull our attention away from that and back to as we've been practicing so far.
Pleasant sound sights and the sense of taste and touch and other pleasant anchors that we can attend to.
And in time,
The goal really is to be able to sit with grace,
Without fear,
With all the difficulties that arise.
But for us,
It's important that we don't try to do that on day one.
So part of this caring for ourselves in this way,
Sometimes it can bring up shame.
I know that for me,
When there are times in my early days of learning when there's things that I couldn't do,
I couldn't do a 45 minute body scan,
I just became disassociated.
I became anxious and twitchy.
And thankfully,
I had the wherewithal to say,
No,
No,
No,
I'm you kidding me?
I'm not doing that.
And I had been really guided.
In fact,
Before my car accident,
I had been learning yoga from beautiful yoga studio,
Unity Yoga here in Vancouver.
And the teachers there were so wise and so clear that everybody's path was unique.
And so I had experience modifying my practice.
So that it worked for me.
And this is what I invite you to do.
And the way that we do that is we begin to listen softly,
Not with hyper visions,
To what our body's telling us.
And remembering that we can't learn.
If we're afraid,
We can't learn if we're anxious,
We can't learn if we're spaced out.
We only can learn when we are calm and focused.
And so I'm going to invite you now to give this a go.
This beginning to really attend to the wisdom of our bodies and helping which will help us make choices that we need in any given moment.
So the first example of that is the practice if you've been with me so far,
Of just coming to the moment of deciding,
Oh,
Okay,
I'm going to do some practice now.
Practice being present.
And the first thing is to notice where in the body there might be some clenching or tension held.
And this is where the choice begins.
Because your body's unique and everyone holds tension in different spots.
So I can guide you and any teacher can guide you generally,
But it's only you that knows what's going on in your body.
And it's okay too,
If it's really hard for you to feel that it's very common and normal to feel kind of a bit numb and not be able to figure these things out.
But as we begin to invite again,
It often gets easier over time.
So noticing if you can,
If there's places that are feeling a bit tight and inviting in a gentle letting go.
This isn't a grasping for relaxation.
No,
This is simply noticing tight muscles,
Tight mind and loosening up a bit.
And the next choice that I'd like to invite you to consider is what position will serve you best right now to do the rest of this practice?
Is it going to be sitting,
Standing,
Lying down or walking?
What will best serve you now to help you stay present?
That's always the kind of question that we can ponder.
So I'm going to offer you a first option,
Which is the option of lying down.
You may already be sitting or doing something else,
But see how that feels like.
Does that call you like,
Oh yes,
I would love to lie down right now.
And just feel into the body when that option is presented.
Do you notice in the physical sensations in the body?
Is there like a clenching up against it?
No,
I don't want that.
Or loosening and like an inviting yes please.
Or as well as physical sensations,
We can tap into thoughts that arise.
Is it like a happy emoji or a frowny emoji?
Or how does the nature of our thoughts become spinning and or do they become calm?
So for every choice that we have,
We can tap into the,
What I call set,
S-E-T,
The sensations,
And thoughts that arise.
You may also feel like,
Oh man,
If I lie down,
I'll just fall asleep.
That's okay.
That's good information.
That's really what this is all about.
Learning about ourselves,
Attuning to ourselves.
And so maybe if you are,
Then after this recording,
You might want to just go have a rest or go to bed early tonight.
You know,
It's about recognizing that.
Or you may choose to sit and if you do,
You can do that same practice of tapping into the sensations,
Emotions and thoughts that arise when you consider,
Do I want to sit?
And if I do,
Which chair do I want to sit in?
Do I want to sit on the floor?
What is speaking to you,
Calling to you right now?
Or maybe instead it would be helpful to stand up,
You know,
Maybe even sitting for a long time today and having a moment just to get up.
Or maybe walking is the right choice.
Do this listening to this reflection just moving for a bit,
Even for these last couple of moments just to get the body going.
Mindfulness isn't always about being quiet,
You know.
For many people,
They become more settled,
They become more clear when they move.
And so this is about listening to your body and what you need and what you need today,
Maybe different than what you need tomorrow.
I wish you well as you begin to listen and remember,
You're in choice.
