Self Compassion

Self-compassion sometimes in life we feel really stressed we feel like we're really suffering either in body,

Heart or mind and we might just have the sense that what we really need what we really long for is someone just to wrap their arms around us and tell us that we're going to be okay and with self-compassion this is something that we can offer ourselves so to begin with just finding a really comfortable way to arrange your body self-compassion is about bringing goodwill,

Tenderness and kindness to our own pain,

To our own suffering and this begins by offering kindness to our own body so you can lie down or you can sit and you really just want to arrange your body in a way where you just feel naturally comfortable where you can rest and where you can settle down once you're settled the invitation is to bring the palm of one of your hands and to rest that hand in the middle of your upper chest and then if you like to bring your other hand to rest on top and so to begin with we offer tenderness and goodwill through touch through the soothing touch of our hands on our heart and as you bring your hands to rest in this way you might have a sense of the feel of the body beneath the hands the touch of your body or your clothing any softness or warmness there and you might also have a sense of the hands resting on the body when we rest our hands on the body in this way this begins to very slowly release oxytocin the HUG hormone this can really soothe the nervous system and offer us a sense of safety a sense of being cared for you might also have a sense of your body breathing beneath the hands maybe even a very subtle sense of the beating of the heart and it can take a little bit of time to get used to practising in this way it might feel a little bit odd having our hands resting here or maybe it feels strange to talk about offering ourselves kindness or compassion and this is okay,

This is really natural when I first started practising in this way it felt very alien to me,

It felt a little bit uncomfortable and over time I've come to appreciate this way of cultivating goodwill offering myself kindness when I'm not feeling too great we can also offer ourselves kindness by just bringing more awareness into our bodies so often we live from the perspective of the mind rushing around so let's just take some time to check in with the body maybe noticing anywhere in the body where we're bracing,

Where we're holding on to any tension so you might notice up in the forehead any creasing in the brow and maybe just softening here allowing the forehead to soften as much as it will and at the same time receiving any tension that might remain allowing the eyes to soften allowing the eyes to relax maybe even open a little bit their closed often we hold quite a lot of tension in the jaw so what would it be like to just allow the lower jaw to drop to loosen all the while the hands are here on the heart on the upper chest and just holding ourselves just holding ourselves gently tenderly maybe noticing any tightness or tension in the shoulders letting the shoulders drop and if there's tightness there in the tops of the shoulders maybe bringing one of your hands to just rest on top of one of the shoulders so rather than trying to massage away any tension which can be really helpful now we're just simply offering acknowledgement through touch offering contact offering the warmth of the hand to the shoulder the palm of the other hand still rests over the heart and it's worth saying if at any point in the practice holding the arms and the hands in any way is creating suffering in the body is creating tension then really feeling free just to allow the hands to to rest in the lap for a while or maybe even resting on the upper thighs and giving contact and warmth here might also notice any holding or tensing in the belly the way our society is structured means often we sort of put our belly in so that like something about holding the belly in makes us more acceptable but this can cause a lot of tension and strain so what would it be like to just let your belly completely relax and relax often just for now really letting your body breathe fully maybe even bringing the palm of one of your hands to rest here on the lower abdomen feeling your body underneath your hand feeling the soothing touch of the hand in contact with the body maybe feeling the movement of the breath in the belly also you might just have a sense of any heaviness in the buttocks and in the lower body feeling the safety,

The solidity of the ground beneath you the warmth of the hand of your hands on your heart perhaps the other hand on the belly or maybe gently offering kindness to another place in the body where there is tension or suffering if you wish to you might inwardly offer yourself some words of kindness,

Of goodwill so you might say to yourself,

May I be safe may I be peaceful if you've noticed that you've been giving yourself a hard time recently then perhaps offering the words,

May I be kind to myself may I accept myself just as I am may I be kind to myself may I take care of myself finding whatever words most resonate with you might be as simple as just saying,

Hey,

It's okay mate,

It's alright it's okay darling feeling your body comfortable,

Resting here feeling the warmth and support of your hands on your body wherever they are,

Spending this precious time to take care of yourself and offering self compassion to your own suffering so we'll bring this practice to a close now remembering at any time during your day and the coming days when you're feeling stressed or sad or anxious or exhausted just to bring the palm of one of your hands to rest on your upper chest that's all you need to do thank you for practicing with me and may you be peaceful