Hello and welcome to this meditation about getting to know a protector within yourself.
Protectors are parts of us that developed in an attempt to protect the wounded and scared inner child,
And they're really doing the best that they know how,
But the ways in which they're causing a dissociation or reaction in your system is no longer necessary.
As you begin to get to know your own internal system and start to understand these roles of your protectors,
It's going to support you in your journey of physical and emotional healing.
Because when we truly see that these parts of ourselves are acting in a way to protect us,
Doing what they know how to to survive,
In ways that they think are going to keep us alive and prevent us from feeling a deep pain,
Then we can't help but have compassion for them.
And protectors are our allies.
Even though they're acting in ways that might be harmful to you right now,
When we can inform them that you're capable,
That you're willing to learn how to be more present and take care of yourself more deeply,
Then they can shift their roles and become even stronger allies in your life,
Helping you reach that version of yourself who exists in your intention for life.
And if you're ready,
I invite you to find a comfortable position,
Sitting or laying down.
And we'll start just by taking some long and deep breaths,
Maybe shifting your body if you need to get more comfortable.
And breathing into your body here,
Closing your eyes,
If that feels right for you.
And I invite you to take a deep breath into your belly and up into your heart.
And on the exhale,
Just letting go,
And allowing your body to soften.
And when you start to feel relaxed and present,
I invite you to feel the earth under your body supporting you here today.
And I invite you to bring into your mind's eye a situation or a person that has caused a lot of reactivity within you.
And this might be someone at work,
Or a partner,
Or a friend.
Someone in your life who might act in a certain way,
Do something,
Or say something,
That you begin to feel a reaction to.
You begin to feel a reaction to.
And as you breathe here,
We can just witness if there's any energy beginning to move inside you,
As you begin to draw this up.
And we'll slow down and just notice what's happening in your body.
Any sensations,
Or memories,
Or emotions.
And I invite you to locate where this reaction is happening in your body.
And instead of pushing that reaction away,
Or telling it it shouldn't be there,
That it's bad to feel that way,
We're going to begin to work with it together,
To give you some more information.
And if at any point this begins to become too activating,
You can open your eyes and come out of the meditation.
I just invite you to feel my voice as a support for you here,
A resource.
Holding no judgment for what might come up in this exploration today.
Just a lot of curiosity,
And compassion,
And understanding that all of this is a way your system has developed to survive.
And so I meet it all with a lot of honoring.
So I invite you again to notice your body.
And any sensation with this situation.
And sensation can speak to us in temperature,
Energy.
Our nervous system can also speak to us in affect,
Which is like our brain.
Primal emotions,
Like rage,
And shame,
And fear,
Or image.
And you might notice that this reactivity inside has a color,
Or a shape,
Or an appearance of some kind,
Or even it might be showing itself as a younger version of yourself,
Or an ancestor.
And you might also begin to notice what your mind is saying,
What you're hearing yourself say.
Say to yourself,
Maybe about you,
Or about another person.
And you might even notice that there is an impulse inside.
Maybe to say something to them,
Or to run away,
Or to reach out to others.
And in this moment,
We'll just notice that impulse.
And you're just having an experience right now,
In your body,
With your thoughts,
With these impulses.
And I wonder if it's possible just to allow yourself to have this experience.
And maybe with some curiosity from this vantage point,
Of this chain of reactions that happens in your nervous system,
When we bring to mind this situation.
And at this point,
I just invite you to allow that trigger,
If it's a person,
Or an event of some kind,
Just to fade from your awareness.
And the experience in your body can stay here.
And the experience in your body can stay here.
Just that trigger itself,
We can invite that to fade from the mind.
And to explore,
With some curiosity,
That this chain of reactions occurring in relation to this other person,
Is really some part of you.
A protective part of you.
Who has created a maybe even elaborate way to protect you from being hurt by this situation.
Maybe there's something familiar in that exchange with the other person that your body remembers from another time.
And so this protective part in you steps up and steps in to prevent what it perceives as a danger.
And I invite you to ask this part of you to turn towards you.
Yeah,
So to turn away from this other person that it's triggered by.
And to turn towards you.
We can just breathe here,
Feeling the ground underneath you.
And I invite you to consider in yourself as you and this part get closer together.
How do you feel towards this part?
How do you feel towards this part?
And maybe there's judgment or shame or anger.
And yet,
If there's any thread of curiosity or clarity or openness to get to know this protective part,
I invite you to follow that.
And we're going to talk to this part just like you would talk to a person.
With respect and understanding.
They just want to be known.
And we'll see first what this part wants you to know about it.
And you can just ask it,
What is your role?
What are you worried would happen if you didn't respond in this way?
To this situation?
And just really listen.
What is it afraid would happen if it didn't react like this on behalf of you?
And in other words,
What is its intention?
In reacting in this way?
